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Ielts exam preparation for a higher band score., ielts essay: gap between poor and rich is increasing in modern world.
IELTS Essay Topic:
The gap between poor and rich is increasing in modern world. Why this is the case? What problems this can cause in our society and what measures could be taken to tackle this issue.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example or evidence.
Sample Answer: In some countries there is a wide gap between indigent and welfare society and this gap in increasing rapidly in modern world. This kind of problem might be caused by several reasons while there are some actions that can be taken in to consideration to tackle this problem.
The most notable reason for the wide gap between the poor and the rich is the absence of government’s prudent policy. The role of the government is to manage economical and social sectors, fair distribution of resources among people, creating job opportunities for rural people, subsiding neglected and promising sectors, educating people and taking many development works in to implementation phase. Only the government can watch wealth distribution and take initiatives for development works. For example, ensuring tax collection and using it for development of the country is only possible by the government in a country. However, many countries lack honest and visionary government bodies and thus those policies are never implemented. Thus the rich in such country accumulate more wealth while poor people struggle even more. Moreover they suffer from global economic system which is capitalism.
Corruption in many countries is quite common these days and this trend allows rich people to find ways to earn more money while poor population finds it difficult even to earn a decent amount to support their family. A lack of government initiatives could be the root cause for this. For example, the poor farmers sell their goods at a cheaper rate while the middle-men earn a fortune simply by syndicating and manipulating the market price. The banks offer loans to rich people and a poor have no way to get any monetary help from any bank or from any government organization. This is another reason poor people get no opportunity to develop their economic condition while rich amasses more fortune.
Unfair distribution in a country causes many unavoidable problems including increasing crime, social anxiety, brain drain, political instability, unfair distribution of power and can even cause a civil war.
However, there are few measures that can be taken into consideration to address this problem. Firstly, the government should encourage local organizations to support the poor people. This support should include incentives, loans and education. Government can take initiatives so that poor people get fair prices on the goods they produce and sell. Decentralization is also required for the development of rural areas. More vocational education should be encouraged to build a skilled nation. The fair collection and distribution of tax and other revenue should be strictly managed and banks should be obliged to grant loans to the poor and capable people.
Thus the local economy can improves gradually. Furthermore, the government should subsidize some production sectors such as seeds, tractors, and fertilizers in order to enhance agricultural production in many countries.
To conclude, the gap between poor and rich is an issue every government should take seriously and practical measures should be taken in to consideration to tackle this pressing issue.
[Written by – Alif Rifky ]
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IELTS Essay Band 8.5: Gap between the rich and the poor
The gap between rich and poor continues to widen in many countries.
What solutions can be implemented to reduce income inequality and promote social cohesion?
Task Achievement
This is a well-written essay that clearly addresses the question. You have identified the main causes of income inequality and proposed relevant solutions. Your ideas are well-developed and logically presented. To further improve, consider providing more specific examples or evidence to support your points, and further elaborate on how your proposed solutions would work in practice.
- Provide more specific examples or case studies to illustrate the points made.
- Provide more detailed evidence to support the points made.
- Further elaborate on how the proposed solutions would work in practice.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
You have demonstrated a strong command of grammatical structures and punctuation in this essay. Your sentences are well formed and error-free, contributing to the overall coherence and cohesion of your argument. However, there is room for improvement in terms of lexical variety and sentence variety. Consider incorporating more advanced vocabulary and varied sentence starters to enhance your grammatical range.
- Use more varied sentence starters to avoid repetition.
- Incorporate more advanced vocabulary to demonstrate a wider lexical range.
- Use more varied linking words to improve cohesion.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have written a well-structured and coherent essay. Your ideas are logically organized and your arguments are clearly presented. You have used a variety of cohesive devices effectively to link your ideas and paragraphs. However, there is room for improvement in your introduction and conclusion. Consider including a brief overview of your main points in the introduction and a stronger final statement in the conclusion. Also, be mindful of overusing certain phrases or ideas. Keep up the good work!
- Consider including a brief overview of the main points in the introduction.
- Use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each body paragraph to guide the reader.
- Include a stronger final statement in the conclusion to leave a lasting impression on the reader.
- Avoid overusing certain phrases or ideas to maintain the reader's interest.
Lexical Resource
You have demonstrated a high level of lexical resource in your essay. Your vocabulary is wide and varied, and you have used it flexibly and accurately to express your ideas. You have also used some less common vocabulary, which adds sophistication to your writing. There are no errors in word formation or word choice, and your vocabulary is not dependent on the question. Keep up the good work!