good one liners for best man speech

  • Food & Drink
  • Wedding Music
  • Wedding Photography
  • Formal Wear
  • The Honeymoon
  • The Bachelor Party
  • Getting In Shape
  • Sex & Relationships
  • Best Man Duties
  • Groomsmen Duties
  • Wedding Speeches
  • Gifts For Groomsmen
  • Engagement Ring
  • Wedding Band
  • Bachelor Party
  • Wedding Registries
  • Groomsmen Gifts
  • Bridal Gifts
  • Formal Wear & Tuxedos
  • Wedding Bands
  • Engagement Rings
  • Bachelor Party Supplies
  • Honeymoon Supplies
  • Ultimate Budget Spreadsheet
  • Badass Bachelor Party Spreadsheet
  • Engagement Ring Setting Finder
  • Guest Text Reminders
  • Wedding Websites
  • Planning Checklists
  • Photography Shot List
  • The Must-Read MANuals
  • Proposal Photographers
  • Changing The Name
  • Diamond Comparison
  • Hotel Room Block Booking
  • Wedding Price Guides
  • Signature Cocktail Generator

The Plunge

The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

As the best man, you’re tasked with giving the toast—maybe the most famous one of the evening. For the big speech, it’s important to have some jokes scattered throughout. The couple gets to be sentimental. Her father gets to be sad and nostalgic. You need to bring the funny like it’s showtime at the Apollo. That’s no easy task, either. Luckily, there are dozens of jokes that have already been written that you can plug your buddy’s name into and carry on. We compiled some of our favorites for you here. Good luck!

The Openers

Good evening everyone. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan. Of course, I’m only kidding. We went over the speech 40 minutes ago in the hall.

It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers.

We’ve reached the moment in the evening where we get to watch the groom figet and worry in anticipation. Yes, everyone, I’ve been asked by the staff to give him the bill.

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I begin, I just want to apologize for not being an experienced public speaker. I’m probably going to spend most of the time looking at this piece of paper in my hands. Oh, it’s not my notes – it’s a picture of the triple Jameson I’m going to down as soon as this is over.

I just heard there was a lucrative pool on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 40 minutes, so settle in…

Before I begin my speech, there’s just one order of business I’ve been asked to take care of. *Hold up pair of trousers with padlock on them* These are Jack’s Chastity Pants. I know he’s given keys out to various ladies over the years, but since he is now a married man, he’d like to get those copies back, so Jill is the only one with access. *Wait for the keys you strategically handed out to wedding guests to be brought up*

My name is Peter and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but shut up – I know your secrets.

Just a couple of rules before we begin. If you have a mobile phone – leave it switched on, entertain yourselves. And if anyone texts you any good jokes, kindly pass them up to the front.”

I’ve been told I won’t get away with a few thank yous and a quick toast. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt.  Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!

Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen – Before I came here today one of my good friends gave me some advice on giving this speech. He said think of it like walking through a nudist camp, it’s only hard for the first minute.

Jokes About The Groom

Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff from ebay, amazon and I want one of those dot com. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until he overheard someone say the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press.

I read somewhere the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass to the happy couple!

Sally is a bright, charming, wonderful woman, who deserves a good husband. It’s such a shame Harry swooped in before she could find one.

I think the main reason we’ve lasted as friends all these years is because you’re geographically convenient…and you had a trampoline.

Jack is the kindest friend anyone could ask for; a man whose philanthropy knows no bounds. ‘Generosity’ should be his middle name. He would do anything for me; like helping write a section of the best man speech because you forgot about it until late last night at the bar!

Jack was in a pub when he proposed. No, really, it was actually very romantic – he got up on one knee.

It’s strange to be giving a speech like this one, because my parents always told me that if I had nothing good to say about someone, I should just be quiet.

Seeing the happy couple walking down the aisle earlier today, I’m sure we all agree that the bride looked simply stunning. The groom, on the other hand, simply looked stunned.

So I’m the best man, although I think I was picked by default since the groom doesn’t really have any other friends.

I can only say in my defense that Mike and I share a common sense of humor so if this speech is in anyway unfunny please “Feel Free to Blame Mike.”

I’d also like to congratulate Keith on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it.

John did tell me that the vicar was firmly against sex before marriage. However, Jane did assure him it would only take a couple of minutes.

Rest assured though, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I’ve promised Dan and Anne that if there is anything slightly risqué, I’ll whip it out immediately …”

Although Ria did actually tell me Paul has always brightened up her life. Well, she actually said he never turned the lights off but it amounts to the same thing pretty much.

I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every extra minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the Groom’s dance lessons worked out.

Jokes About The Bride

I do have to say though how lucky you are Dave, you’re leaving with a beautiful wife whom you love. And you, Miranda, you get to go home with such a nice new dress and beautiful bouquet of flowers, it’s great.

Jill, you are an amazing woman who deserves a wonderful husband. And I promise you I won’t rest until I get to the bottom of what’s gone wrong here.

Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. Linda, I expect you had a similar experience when Paul asked you to be his wife.

I spoke to both Sally and Paul before the Wedding and I asked Paul what he was looking for in Marriage – he said “Love, happiness and a long life together.” When I asked Sally the same question – she replied – A coffee percolator!

Speaking of Jane, I would like to say how beautiful she looks today in that fantastic dress …Dan likes it too, as he told me in the church it will blend in just nicely well with the rest of the kitchen.

Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!”

When I saw Linda heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.”

Before proposing, Paul went to ask Linda’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing Paul took the hand that had spent 20 years fishing into his wallet!

I recognize my place here; being best man at a wedding is like being the dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you say too much people start freaking out.

If you can’t hear me in the back, let the silence in the front assure you that you’re not really missing out on anything.

A Best Man is like a dog. You love him, care about him, and he’s only thrown up and ruined your upholstery twice.

I would like to start by saying what a pleasure it is to be Best Man at Jack and Jill’s wedding. Jack made me compete for this honor today, but I was able to beat Mark the Bartender over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am!

I found the speech length really difficult to settle on. At one point, it ran to almost 70 minutes, so I cut it down to a five-minute speech but I just felt like too many important things were being left out. So I came to a compromise – I’m going to read the five-minute speech. Then straight afterwards, I’ll do 70-minute one and you guys can tell me which speech I should use.

What can you say about a man who came from humble beginnings and is now rising to the top of his industry based solely on his intelligence, grit and willpower? A man whose charisma knows no bounds and who has already distinguished himself amongst his peers? Because I’m trying to write my Tinder profile and I’m having trouble summarizing myself.

When I sat down to write this speech I Googled “perfect best man speech”, but you had to pay to read the examples and I didn’t think it was worth it, so I’m gonna wing it.

I admit, I’m extremely nervous right now. As the people sitting near to me at the table can testify, it really is possible to smell fear.”

I must admit, I’m not used to speaking in public. Until now I thought a toastmaster was a kitchen appliance.

The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

You know, it’s been said that being asked to be best man is like being asked to make love to Camilla Parker Bowles.. It’s a great honor but you don’t really want to do it!

I’ve been anxious about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately last night I slept like a baby. Waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out. Ten minutes ago, I had to ask a complete stranger to burp me.

Dave was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the bride and groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…

What’s the difference between in-laws and out-laws? Outlaws are wanted.”

Leading up to today John and Jane were having an issue with the seating plan. Who would sit comfortably in here & who would have to get up and stand during the speeches so we decided to use wedding present list, biggest presents at front and work it back from there. So hopefully you can hear me at the back when I say on behalf of Jane and John thank‐you very much for the teaspoons.

40 Wedding Ceremony Readings That Will Wow Any Crowd

40 Wedding Ceremony Readings That Will Wow Any Crowd

The Groom Speech: 10 Rules

The Groom Speech: 10 Rules

6 Things To Include In Your Groom Speech

6 Things To Include In Your Groom Speech

Spin Your Wedding Speech For Maximum Impact

Spin Your Wedding Speech For Maximum Impact

Join the plunge (don’t worry: it’s free).

Best Man Wedding Toast Ideas, Samples, and Guidance

Best Man Wedding Toast Ideas, Samples, and Guidance

The Toast With the Most: The Best Man’s Big Speech

The Toast With the Most: The Best Man’s Big Speech

The Father of the Bride Toast

The Father of the Bride Toast

Everything You Need To Know About Making Speeches With Your Wife

Everything You Need To Know About Making Speeches With Your Wife

Go For Emotion In Your Wedding Speech

Go For Emotion In Your Wedding Speech

6 Things To Avoid In Your Best Man Speech

6 Things To Avoid In Your Best Man Speech

Using Subtext and Speeching Between The Lines

Using Subtext and Speeching Between The Lines

The Sounds of Silence: Using Pauses in Your Speech

The Sounds of Silence: Using Pauses in Your Speech

The First Seven Seconds Of Your Wedding Speech-How To Crush It

The First Seven Seconds Of Your Wedding Speech-How To Crush It

Best Man Speech: Who Do You Mention?

Best Man Speech: Who Do You Mention?

The Easiest Speech You’ll Ever Give

The Easiest Speech You’ll Ever Give

Who Gives Toasts at the Rehearsal Dinner?

Who Gives Toasts at the Rehearsal Dinner?

The Plunge

good one liners for best man speech

This website uses cookies to ensure you get the best experience on our website

  • Anniversary Gifts
  • Stag and Hen
  • Wedding DIY
  • Wedding Dresses
  • Wedding Planning
  • Wedding Songs
  • Wedding Speeches
  • Wedding Venues
  • Date Checker
  • Advertise with us
  • Industry Blog
  • Submit a wedding
  • Giving back
  • Supplier Log in
  • Your Inspiration

The Most Hilarious Best Mans Speech Jokes

Author: Hollie Bond

NB: To help you browse our best suggestions we have included some third party links. Some purchases made through these links may earn us a commission to help keep our blogs and offers current and up to date. Thanks for your support!

Best Man Speech Opening Jokes

Jokes about the newlyweds, self-deprecating best man jokes, jokes to end the best man's speech.

Feeling the pressure to deliver a best man’s speech that will make every guest in the room laugh? Keep guests young and old entertained for the whole speech with these funny best man’s speech jokes.

It’s such an honour to be asked to be a best man and this VIP role comes with many fun and important tasks (if you’re not sure what they are check out our guide to being a brilliant best man here). One of the tasks many best men dread though is writing and delivering the best man speech on the wedding day. Unless you’re a natural public speaker or have spent time on stage, it can be a pretty daunting prospect, especially when you consider that the best man speech is traditionally known to be the funniest and most looked forward to of all the speeches.

The good news is, you’re not alone and thousands of other best men before you have sat and stared at a blank piece of paper for hours before finally getting the inspiration to write an awesome best man speech.

We’ve got a comprehensive guide on how to write a brilliant groom’s speech here to help you with the structure, format, and length. But, once you have the general gist and bare bones of the best man speech jotted down, it’s time to insert some funny jokes into each section, to keep all the guests chuckling with laughter from start to finish.

Remember you’re not expected to be a professional stand-up comedian, Michael McIntyre style, and a wedding is often an emotional day, so it’s absolutely fine to make jokes that are unique to the couple or situation and also to include a heartfelt sentiment or two in between all the gags. To help you on your way to going down in history as the best best man ever, we’ve rounded up some of the greatest tried-and-tested best man speech jokes and one-liners that’ll easily fit into most wedding speeches. Feel free to tailor them to fit the newlyweds you’re talking about. Good luck!

What shouldn’t the best man joke about?

When it comes to writing your best man speech, there are certain topics that are strictly off-limits. It’s important to spend time thinking about things that will come across badly or offend any guests and really consider every sentence carefully before it makes the final edit.

Mentioning the groom’s ex-girlfriends or a previous wife is a definite no-go, as is talking about the groom’s sex life in any way. So that means no mention of the impending wedding night too. Anecdotes about the groom can be best man speech gold, but you need to get to the punch line within a few sentences otherwise you’ll lose the audience and always make sure any anecdotes will amuse all types of guests.

The best man should always avoid joking about the bride too. Unless you’re really good mates with her and know her well enough to have a giggle with her, then it’s best to just say something heartfelt and lovely about her.

Jokes containing swear words should also be avoided. While the younger generation of guests might not flinch when you swear, older members of the audience could be extremely offended. Finally, it’s best to steer clear of making a joke about how long it took for the groom to propose if that was the case. Not only does it make the bride look like all she wanted was a ring on her finge, it also might be an area of contention between the couple so won’t come across as funny to them.

And remember, you’re not the next Al Murray or Michael McIntyre so you don’t need to pepper your speech with one-liners worthy of a stand-up routine. Only joke about things that are genuinely amusing and specific to the groom at the wedding you’re attending rather than anything too generic that you’ve found on the internet.

Starting the best man’s speech is the most difficult part. Once you’ve said a few words, shaken off those nerves, and realised the crowd isn’t full of people about to throw tomatoes at you, you’ll get into your stride, but those first few sentences can be pretty scary.

The trick is to get the audience on your side from the off with a short and easy-to-understand joke that sets the tone for the speech to follow. Here are some great opener ideas for best man speeches.

1) If there’s anybody here today who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you’ve just married [NAME OF THE GROOM].

2) Good evening. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan. Of course, I’m only joking. She went over the speech with me half an hour ago in the bar.

3) Everyone here who knows Sophie will know that she is a wonderful and kind person, who deserves a good husband. Thank god Theo married her before she found one.

4) We’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the Groom shift uncomfortably in his seat and grip the tablecloth in nervous anticipation. That’s right, I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill.

5) It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers.

6) I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 45 minutes, so settle in…

7) My name is James and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but you’d do well to keep quiet – I know your secrets.

8) I’d like to congratulate the Groom on a truly magnificent speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right – I could hardly follow a word of it.

9) Being asked to be someone’s best man is like being called up for jury duty. You don’t really want to do it, but know you have to. You’re made to dress in a suit and pretend to be an upstanding member of the community. The only difference is I didn’t have a say if the life sentence passed earlier today.

10) I did ask for a microphone but was told one wasn’t available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you’re not missing out on anything.

11) I’ve been told I can’t get away with a few thank yous and a quick toast in this speech. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.

12) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I came here today one of my good friends gave me some advice on giving this speech. He said think of it like walking through a nudist camp, it’s only hard for the first minute.

13) You’ve got no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to today. After all the time I’ve been friends with the Groom, he has at long last admitted that I am in fact the best man.

14) Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I begin, I just want to apologise for not being an experienced public speaker. I’m probably going to spend most of the time looking at this piece of paper in my hands. Oh, it’s not my notes – it’s a picture of the triple vodka I’m going to down as soon as this is over.

15) Firstly I’d like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I’ve stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand.

16) I don’t believe in roasting the groom on his special day. Therefore this speech won’t contain anything embarrassing or controversial about Matt. Instead I’ll refer only to the kind, funny side of his character. Thank you and goodnight.

17) It’s strange to be giving a speech like this one, because my parents always told me that if I had nothing good to say about someone, I should just be quiet.

18) Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, a great man… but that’s enough about me, I’m here to give a speech about Arthur!

19) For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Sam and for those of those who do know me…I apologise. My full name is actually ‘Sam-would-you-like-a-drink’. For those of you who I chat to in the bar later, I’d appreciate it if you could use my full name.

20) Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom drink alone, could I?

21) Now, before I start, the venue manger has asked me to request that, for reasons of health and safety, none of you get up on top of the chairs and tables during my standing ovation.

22) I have no problem admitting to you all that I’m extremely nervous right now. And, as the people sitting near the front of the room can attest, it is actually possible to smell fear.

Wedding Date in Mind? We offer you the chance to check the availability of your preferred wedding dates with venues in each county.

Once you’ve opened the best man’s speech and given the guests an idea of the tone and also helped them relax, knowing that you’re not about to deliver a complete car crash of a speech, it’s time to get personal.

Remember, the best man’s speech is mostly intended as an ode to the groom and your friendship and to give the guests an idea of what the main man at the wedding is really like behind closed doors!

You can also include some jokes about the bride (or another groom at a same-sex wedding), although keep these minimal as the father of the bride will have spent a large part of his speech talking about his daughter. As well as these tried-and-tested quips, try to include a few jokes that are specific and personal to your friend, to ensure the groom and his guests feel like you do actually know and love him!

23) So where do I start about Ben? Well, for starters he’s handsome, witty, intelligent, he’s charm…sorry… Ben, I’m having trouble reading you handwriting. You can tell me the rest later.

24) The bride and groom have asked that I don’t talk about Mike’s mishaps, mistakes, embarrassing moments or ex-girlfriends. So thanks for listening everyone, that’s it from me!

25) I do have to say though Rowan just how lucky you are. You will leave here today with a wife who is warm, loving and caring. And Margot, how lucky you are as well. You leave here today having gained a lovely dress and a wonderful bouquet of flowers.

26) Helen please put your left hand flat on the table. Paul please place your hand on top of hers. Enjoy this moment Paul because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand.

27) We all know the bride is a wonderful lady who deserves the perfect guy. Too bad you don’t always get what you deserve.

28) Well, I do hope that Meghan and Harry enjoy their honeymoon in Wales. I assume that’s where they’re going anyway… When I asked Harry what he was doing after the wedding, he said he was going to Bangor for a fortnight.

29) I’ve been instructed by the bride and groom to keep this speech smut-free, so if I come across any innuendo, I’ll whip it out immediately.

30) Harry is the kindest friend anyone could ask for; a man whose philanthropy knows no bounds. ‘Generosity’ should be his middle name. He would do anything for me; like helping write a section of the best man speech because I forgot about it until late last night at the bar!

30) Seeing the happy couple walking down the aisle earlier today, I’m sure we all agree that the bride looked simply stunning. The groom, on the other hand, simply looked stunned.

31) I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every extra minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the Groom’s dance lessons worked out.

If the groom is known to be a bit of a tech geek or a gamer…

32) Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff online. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until I told him the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press.

33) Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. Jane, I expect you had a similar experience when David asked you to be his wife.

34) Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!

35) When I saw Kate heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.”

36) Before proposing, William went to ask Kate’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing William took the hand that had spent 25 years fishing into his wallet.

37) I’ve been asked by many how I’m going to cope with my best friend being married and spending all of his time loved up at home. I’m thrilled! I’ll finally be able to talk to women without him cramping my style.

It’s a classic and winning tool in British humour – the self-deprecating joke, where you take the mick out of yourself in order to make the crowd both laugh and also get them on your side straight away. Here are some of the best ways to put yourself down in hilarious fashion.

38) I would like to start by saying what a pleasure it is to be Best Man at Charles and Camilla’s wedding. Charles made me compete for this honour today, but I was able to beat the barman over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am!

39) The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

40) I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately last night I slept like a baby. Waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out.

You’ll probably want to end the speech on more of a heartfelt note or with some sort of thanks and advice for the newlyweds, but there’s always time to get a couple of more jokes in at the groom’s expense beforehand…

41) Ryan was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the bride and groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…

42) I’ve just got some last messages here to read out: one from Greg’s football team to Jacqui: “Apologies we couldn’t all be there today, good luck with Greg, we found him to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight.”

Looking for a Wedding Venue? We can arrange for brochures to be sent directly to you based on what you are looking for.

Hollie Bond

Hollie is a lifestyle journalist with over ten years’ experience working in the wedding industry as Lifestyle Editor for You & Your Wedding magazine Also a Regional Editor for Muddy Stilettos, Hollie has written for Square Meal magazine, Family History Monthly, BBC History magazine and Homes & Antiques. In her spare time you can find Hollie in a dance studio practising ballet…

Learn more about Hollie Bond

Posts we recommend

Not sure this is the post for you? No problem. We have hand picked some other options that we think might tickle your fancy...

good one liners for best man speech

30 Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

Handy one-liners to make the guests lol.

good one liners for best man speech

If you've read our post on how to make a great best man speech , you'll know that we recommend starting with a joke , and here, we're sharing 30 foolproof examples of funny opening lines for wedding speeches! The beauty of this list is that it works for any wedding speech, whether you're a groom , bride, best man , bridesmaid , groomsman, bridesman, groomsmaid, father of the bride, father of the groom, mother of the bride, mother of the groom, granny or grandad, or just a close pal with a knack for public speaking!

Boasting everything from eye roll-worthy classics to offbeat gags, our round-up of funny opening lines for wedding speeches is sure to have something to suit your personal style, and many of them can be customised to pack an even bigger punch on the day. Kick off with one of these gems, and you'll not only put the audience at ease, you'll set yourself up for a terrific wedding speech!

good one liners for best man speech

Note: [Name] can indicate yourself, the bride/groom, the couple as a whole, or another member of the bridal party!

1. “Gosh, what an emotional day it’s been. Even the cake is in tiers!”

2. “Hi everyone! I’m [Name] and it’s time for me to give the speech I frantically scribbled down 15 minutes ago!”

3. "The couple have requested that I don't share any embarrassing stories... so that's it from me! Thanks for listening!"

4. "[Name], I love you so much, and I really hope you'll feel the same about me after you hear my speech."

bride giving a speech

5. "I just want to start by congratulating [previous speaker's Name] on their wonderful speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right, I couldn't follow a word of it."

6. "The couple actually had a bit of trouble finding someone to make a speech today. They started by asking their funniest friend, and they said no. Then they asked their most charming friend, and they said no. After that, they asked their best-looking friend and, again, they said no. Then they asked me, and, after already turning them down three times, I couldn't refuse again."

Bride gives speech Olga Hogan Photography: Hannah & Eoghan

7. "Ladies and gentlemen, today we witnessed a unique event in history - it's the first and presumably last time anyone has trusted me to give a speech!"

8. "[Name] and I share the same sense of humour, so if you don't like my jokes, you can blame them!"

9. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate something truly magical. Something so rare and fortuitous and wonderful that it simply must be celebrated. I am, of course, talking about the open bar/donut wall/photo booth/[Name] wearing a tie ."

good one liners for best man speech

10. "Where do I start with [Name]? They're kind, intelligent, gorgeous, charming... [directed at them] sorry, I'm having trouble reading your writing, you'll have to tell me the rest later."

11. "I think we can all agree that it's been a fantastic day. But unfortunately that ends right here with my speech."

12. "Loyal. Kind. Honest. Generous... That's enough about me, I'm here to talk about [Name]!"

good one liners for best man speech

13. "I'd like to begin my speech by giving the happy couple some relationship advice, but unfortunately I'm single and spend most of my time trying to coax my cat into little outfits/browsing Doctor Who fan sites/playing Rock Paper Scissors with Alexa."

14. "A few months ago, [Name] called me up and asked, 'What are your feelings on marriage?' I had to tell them that, while I was very flattered, I wasn't ready to settle down just yet."

15. "Can everyone hear me OK? If you can't hear me in the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you're not missing anything."

good one liners for best man speech

16. "Hello everyone! I'm [Name]. I'm sure you all know me as (Name's best friend/sister/mum/dad), but if you don't, well done on sneaking into the wedding unnoticed!"

17. "Before I begin, I must explain that, this morning, [Name] asked me to remove anything resembling innuendo from my speech. Unfortunately, I didn't have time to go through it again, but if I come across anything risqué, I'll whip it out immediately."

18. "[Name] knows that I'm a bit nervous about this speech, and they gave me some great advice. They said 'Don't try to be too charming, witty or intellectual... just be yourself!'"

Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

19. "All of us gathered together in this room, we've got something really important in common - none of us have got a clue what I'm going to say next!"

20. "I was told that the secret to a good speech is to start with something that's relevant to everyone in the audience. So here it goes - all of your cars have been stolen."

21. "I want to start by saying that, of all the weddings I've attended over the years, this one is, by far, the most recent."

good one liners for best man speech

22. "I'd like to start by congratulating [Name] on their excellent taste... in speakers."

23. "Before we start, can everybody do me a favour and get up off their seats? Now can everyone take one step backward, please? Now can everyone move one step to the right? And now can everyone move one step left? Thank you. Someone told me that the key to giving a good speech was to move people, but I think they must have been having me on, because this is going terribly!"

wedding speech opening lines funny opening lines sincere opening lines (9)

24. "I'm so happy to be overseeing the only five minutes of today that [bride or groom's Name] didn't plan. Only joking, they went over my speech with me at the bar half an hour ago. [Pulls extra page out of pocket] But I did manage to hide one page!"

25. Guys, before I start, just some housekeeping notes, the venue has asked that you don't stand on any of the chairs and tables for my standing ovation."

26 . I sincerely hope that each day of [Insert names] marriage is better than the the one before, the only thing is that also means they'll look back on today, their wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of their lives.

27. I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. You'll be glad to hear, that last night I slept like a baby. I woke up every two hours, bawling my eyes out.

good one liners for best man speech

28. Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom/bride drink alone, could I?

29. Just some last messages here to read out: one from [NAME’S] football team for [PARTNER] " Apologies we couldn’t all be there today, good luck with [NAME], we found him/her to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight ."

30. Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments of silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 250 chickens, and the many, many carnations, roses and wedding coordinators who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.

Loved these opening lines for wedding speeches? We also have a handy checklist of people you need to remember to thank !

Image credits

Marc lawson photography, via one fab day, see more in:.

good one liners for best man speech

You might also like...

good one liners for best man speech

Creative Wedding Planning Ideas

25 Hilarious Best Man One-Liners to Spice Up Your Wedding Speech

Crafting the perfect best man speech can be a daunting task, but injecting humor into your toast can make it memorable for all the right reasons. One-liners are a fantastic way to add a touch of comedy to your speech while keeping it light-hearted and entertaining. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or simply bring a smile to the newlyweds’ faces, we’ve compiled a list of 25 funny best man one-liners to help you steal the show at the wedding reception.

25 Hilarious Best Man One-Liners to Spice Up Your Wedding Speech

  • “They say marriage is a lifetime commitment. So, [Groom’s Name], what’s it like signing a lifetime contract with a professional nag?”
  • “I’ve known [Groom’s Name] for years, and I can honestly say he’s the luckiest man alive… at least until the honeymoon’s over.”
  • “I’m honored to be the best man today. It’s like being the backup quarterback – you’re not the star, but you’re still expected to deliver.”
  • “I’ve never seen [Groom’s Name] happier than when he met [Bride’s Name]. Well, except maybe that time he beat me at Mario Kart.”
  • “They say marriage is about compromise. So, [Groom’s Name], how many pairs of shoes did you agree to let [Bride’s Name] keep?”
  • “I always knew [Groom’s Name] was a catch. I just never thought anyone would be brave enough to reel him in!”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: Congratulations on marrying the man of your dreams. And to [Groom’s Name]: Sorry, buddy, but you peaked too soon.”
  • “They say marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. But by the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade.”
  • “I’ve never seen two people more perfect for each other than [Groom’s Name] and [Bride’s Name]. It’s like they were made for each other… or at least made to drive each other crazy.”
  • “They say marriage is a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. But let’s focus on the first two for now!”
  • “To the happy couple: May your love be as endless as your wedding reception bar tab!”
  • “I’ve been asked to give [Groom’s Name] some marriage advice. Well, here it is: Remember, happy wife, happy life. And if she’s not happy, just buy her chocolate.”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: You’re not just gaining a husband today – you’re gaining a designated driver for life!”
  • “I’ve heard marriage is a marathon, not a sprint. So, [Groom’s Name], you better start stretching now.”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: Congratulations on snagging [Groom’s Name]. Just remember, you can’t return him once you’ve opened the package!”
  • “They say marriage is like a game of chess: the king always has to protect his queen. But let’s be honest, we all know who wears the pants in this relationship.”
  • “I’ve never seen [Groom’s Name] more nervous than he is today. Well, except maybe that time he had to parallel park in front of his crush.”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: You’re not just marrying [Groom’s Name] – you’re joining the elite club of people who can tell him he’s wrong.”
  • “I asked [Groom’s Name] if he was ready for marriage. He said, ‘I do.’ And by ‘I do,’ I mean ‘I guess so.'”
  • “To the newlyweds: May your love be like Wi-Fi – strong, reliable, and never-ending!”
  • “I’ve never seen [Groom’s Name] look so nervous. It’s like he’s waiting for the results of a paternity test on Maury!”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: You’re not just marrying [Groom’s Name] – you’re also inheriting his impressive collection of Star Wars memorabilia.”
  • “They say marriage is about compromise. Well, [Groom’s Name], get ready to compromise on 90% of your decisions.”
  • “To [Bride’s Name]: Congratulations on finding someone who’s willing to put up with your shopping habits. And to [Groom’s Name]: Good luck fitting all those shoes in the closet!”
  • “I’ve known [Groom’s Name] for a long time, and I can honestly say he’s the luckiest man alive. And [Bride’s Name], well, let’s just say she’s lucky she’s pretty!”

Adding a touch of humor to your best man speech can make it truly memorable for the newlyweds and all the guests in attendance. Whether you choose to use one of these one-liners or draw inspiration from them to create your own, remember that laughter is the best gift you can give to the happy couple on their special day. So, grab the mic, deliver your toast with confidence, and get ready to bring down the house with your comedic prowess!

  • Laughs and Love: Hilarious Best Man Speeches to Inspire Your Wedding Toast
  • Elizabeth Reaser’s Intimate Italian Wedding

You May Also Like

Wedding toast inspirational quotes, witty wedding quotes, 30 free wedding toasts for the bride and groom.

good one liners for best man speech

20 Genuinely Funny Jokes For The Best Man Speech

  • Budget & Planning , wedding-speeches

best man making a speech

No pressure, but the best man speech can really set the tone for the evening.

The best man – along with the other speech makers – is tasked with setting the mood for the night ahead, making sure to give the wedding guests a good laugh. He’ll need to strike the balance between funny and a little cheeky (remember the listening ears of older relatives!) and he may also like to throw in a little sentiment – it is a wedding after all.

RELATED TO:  Have you bought your tickets for  The Wedding Journal Show ? Get exclusive VIP & discounted tickets online now!

If you’re looking for a little bit of inspiration for your best man speech, then we’ve got in spades, from funny one liners to quips that’ll leave the guests in stitches.

Whether you’re a skilled public speaker, a natural comedian or a total novice, littering your best man’s speech with a few of these jokes will really pack a punch.

Opening jokes

The key to a killer best man speech is to kick it off with a great opening line!

“Good evening everyone. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan.”

“It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers!”

“[GROOM’S NAME] was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the bride and groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming¦”

“Leading up to today [GROOM’S NAME] and [BRIDE’S NAME] were having an issue with the seating plan. Who would sit comfortably in here & who would have to get up and stand during the speeches so we decided to use the wedding present list, biggest presents at front and work it back from there. So hopefully you can hear me at the back when I say on behalf of [GROOM’S NAME] and [BRIDE’S NAME] thank‐you very much for the teaspoons.”

“Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!”

Jokes about the groom

A best man speech is an opportunity to give the groom a bit of a roasting!

“On their first date, [GROOM’S NAME] thought he’d make an impression, and promised a seven course meal. She was a tad disappointed when it turned out to be a burger and a six pack!”

“I read somewhere that the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So raise your glasses to the happy couple!”

“Just some last messages here to read out: one from the Groom’s football team to [BRIDE’S NAME] – ‘apologies we couldn’t all be here today, good luck with [GROOM’S NAME], we found him to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight.”

“As part of my research, I discovered that according to tradition I am supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and tell you all about his many good points. Well, I’m very sorry but I can’t sing and I won’t lie.”

“Twenty years ago, the Groom was told by a doctor that he would never dance normally again. When the band starts, you’ll see exactly what that specialist was talking about.”

“[BRIDE’S NAME] please put your left hand flat on the table. [GROOM’S NAME] please place your hand on top of hers. Enjoy this moment [GROOM’S NAME] because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand.”

“You are both so lucky. [GROOM], you get to leave with this amazing woman. And [BRIDE], you get to leave with that beautiful dress and wedding bouquet.”

Jokes about the bride

Aim for a gentle ribbing when it comes to the bride – don’t take the jokes too far!

“Isn’t it funny how history has a habit of repeating itself? Twenty-nine years ago [BRIDE’S NAME]’s parents were sending her off to bed with a dummy. And tonight they’re doing exactly the same thing again!”

“When I saw [BRIDE’S NAME] heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.”

“Everyone who knows the bride knows she’s a wonderful person. She deserves the best husband out there. Thank god [GROOM’S NAME] married her before she found one.”

“Before proposing, [GROOM’S NAME] went to ask [BRIDE’S NAME]’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing he took the hand that had spent 20 years fishing into his wallet!”

Jokes about the best man

When it comes to the best man speech, guests will love a little self-deprecating humour

“A Best Man is like a dog. You love him, care about him, and he’s only thrown up and ruined your upholstery twice.”

“I recognise my place here; being best man at a wedding is like being the dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you say too much people start freaking out.”

“Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. [BRIDE’S NAME], I expect you had a similar experience when [GROOM’S NAME] asked you to be his wife.”

“The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.”

What else goes into the perfect best man speech?

Okay, so you’ve the gags sussed. What else do you need to include in a best man speech?

– Thank the other speakers who have gone before you – Congratulate the newlyweds – Remember to say a few kind words about the bride – Don’t forget to compliment the bridesmaids – Read out messages from guests who couldn’t attend – Propose a toast!

Check out our guide here for even more advice on perfecting the best man speech.

Latest news.

Karma beauty salon in Holywood, Co. Down is giving away a bridal skincare package

WIN The Perfect Bridal Skin Package with Karma

good one liners for best man speech

Bride Diaries: He Put A Ring On It!

Four Seasons Hotel Carlingford

Win A Stay & Afternoon Tea At Four Seasons Hotel Carlingford (CLOSED)

a wedding at glenavon house hotel

Glenavon House Hotel – Where Dreams Come True!

Spending time together on the wedding day

Why You Should Take Some Time Together On Your Wedding Day

Leonard and Nicola's wedding day at La Mon Hotel & Country Club

Nicola and Leonard: A Fairytale Wedding Day

Stay up to date, sign up to get special offers and discounts, all the latest wedding trends and access to must-have suppliers.

good one liners for best man speech

Facebook Fans

Instagram followers

Pinterest followers

X Followers

Youtube Viewers

Email Subscribers

Digital Magazine Views

Monthly Website Visitors

good one liners for best man speech

Plan Your Wedding

  • Wedding Journal Show

Advertise With Us

© 2024 Copyright weddingjournalonline.com – Part of  Penton Media Group

best-man-speech-jokes

255 Hilarious Best Man Speech Jokes to Make Every Guest Laugh

  • 5 months ago

Welcome to the ultimate collection of hilarious best man speech jokes!

If you’ve been given the honor of being the best man at your friend’s wedding, then you know that one of the most important tasks is delivering a memorable and entertaining speech.

In this post, we have curated the funniest and most rib-tickling jokes for the best man speech occasion for you to choose from.

Pick your favorite one from the different categories given below, and let the fun begin!

Table of Contents

Unique Best Man Speech Jokes

Stand out from the rest with our unique best man speech jokes. Make your speech unforgettable with jokes that nobody else will have – your moment to shine.

My only wish for you is that each day of your marriage is better than the previous, so that you can look back on today, your wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of your life.” For those of you who don’t know me, I’m the groom’s brother, and for those of you who do know me… I apologize. It’s been an emotional day. Even the cake is in tiers. Excellent. With Dad-level puns like these it should be a room full of baby showers in no time. “Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I apologise in advance for not being a public speaker. If you see me looking down at this piece of paper again and again, it’s not actually my notes, it’s a picture of the massive drink I’m going to have as soon as this is over.” I actually started my best man’s speech with: “Looking out I see a lot of familiar faces, and a lot of faces that are new to me. I don’t know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.” Bride and Groom were huge LOTR fans. It was perfect. Not the best man but the father of one of the grooms: ‘Well, a gay wedding. What next!’ guests hold their breath The answer, of course, is a honeymoon! ‘Sorry everyone, this speech will be a little bit off the cuff. I figured I would have more time to prepare. [husband and wife] started dating in 1998, and it took them 7 years to get engaged. It took another 6 for the wedding to happen, so I figured I would have at least a few months between the ceremony and the reception to figure this thing out.’ It gives a nice bit of background on the couple, is about as safe as you can get, and should get a few laughs. Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, and a great man. But enough about me! I’d like to offer a toast to the bride and groom. Then whip a piece of toast out of your breast pocket, hold it in their direction, and say you want them to have this. I did it as best man at a large wedding and it killed.” I saw a groom’s brother say, “I always knew you would find the best wife” in front of three other sisters. Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park. I was at a wedding once where the best man inhaled most of the contents of a helium balloon, possibly one of the true great speeches of all time. For my brother’s wedding, I pulled out a piece of paper and started: “I have known this man since we were college roommates eight years ag-Oh sh*t! I brought the wrong suit we’re going to have to wing it.” All those among you who know the Bride will know that she is a wonderful and caring person. She deserves a good husband. Thank God he married her before she found one. They joke that a woman finds a man she loves for exactly who he is and then spends her life trying to change him. So let’s all raise our glasses and take a last look at the Groom. We’re gonna miss you, buddy! My wedding speech started with: ‘I’m 33 and I’ve no kids, no steady girlfriend and like being single, what do I know about marriage?’ The Groom was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the Bride and Groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming… All of us gathered together in this room, we’ve got something really important in common – none of us have got a clue what I’m going to say next! I have to say, I was a little worried when the groom asked me to be his best man. I mean, this is a guy who once tried to microwave a frozen pizza while it was still in the box. But then he met the bride, and she’s been keeping him out of trouble ever since. My maid of honor opened hers with ‘For those of you who don’t know who I am… how dare you?’ To the owner of a blue Honda, license plate 4YG 87X, your car is being towed. Replace make, model, plate with the actual car of someone in the wedding party. I’m not used to public speaking. I only found out today that a toastmaster isn’t actually a kitchen appliance. Say a bunch of really good compliments about a guy. Then say “enough about the best man, let’s talk about the groom.” I recently gave a toast at a scottish wedding, groom and groomsmen were all wearing kilts. I started my toast by saying how lovely the bride looked, and how gorgeous she looked in her dress… I followed it up by saying how the groom doesn’t look half bad in his dress either. Got a good amount of laughs. The groom stole the bride’s heart, so the bride stole the groom’s last name. All in all, I would say that things worked out quite nicely, considering neither of them ended up in prison… I didn’t really know where to start so I thought I’d trawl the internet. After a couple of hours I’d found some really, really good stuff. But then I remembered that I was supposed to be writing a speech. Twenty years ago, the Groom was told by a doctor that he would never dance normally again. When the band starts, you’ll see exactly what that specialist was talking about. I’d like to start by congratulating the happy couple on their excellent taste… in speakers.

Funny Best Man Speech Jokes

Lighten the mood and captivate the crowd with our handpicked funny best man speech jokes. These jokes are like secret ingredients for a speech that everyone will remember.

Now I know what you’re all thinking, doesn’t the best man look great in his suit! I would like to comment that this is down to a fitness regime which includes me doing at least 50 push-ups a day for the last three months. But I should mention that none of them have actually been intentional – I’ve just been collapsing a lot from all the nerves and stress. I’ve known the groom for years, and I’ve got to say, he’s the luckiest guy in the room today. And that’s not just because he’s getting married, but because he’s got me as his best man. I mean, have you seen the other guys he hangs out with? My name is Joe and I am an alcoholic. What? Am I in the wrong place? Hi everyone, I’m the best man – although I think I was picked by default since the groom doesn’t really have any other friends. Now, before I start, the hotel manger has asked me to request that, for reasons of health and safety, none of you get up on top of the chairs and tables during my standing ovation. We’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the Groom shift uncomfortably in his seat and grip the tablecloth in nervous anticipation. That’s right. I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill. For the speech today, the Bride and Groom have asked that I don’t talk about the Groom’s mishaps, mistakes, embarrassing moments or ex-girlfriends. So thanks for listening everyone, that’s all from me! I have no problem admitting to you all that I’m extremely nervous right now. And as the people sitting near the front of the room can attest, it is actually possible to smell fear. Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 200 chickens, countless carnations, delphiniums, lilies and roses who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m… I have been the groom’s mate for 2 days now, he found my advert on a website as he hasn’t got many friends so had to hire someone for the day. I guess you’re all wondering why I gathered you here today… If I could just say a few words… I’d be a better public speaker! I’ve been instructed to keep this speech smut-free, so if I come across any innuendo as I’m reading through, I’ll whip it out immediately. If you could keep the clapping and cheering to a minimum today – I’ve got a terrible hangover. I know you shouldn’t drink heavily before a big event but I couldn’t let the Groom drink alone, could I? I did ask for a microphone but was told there weren’t any available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence at the front should assure you that you’re not missing out on anything. The Groom and I share a common sense of humour. So if this is not funny, feel free to blame him. I spoke to some of the groom’s colleagues and they told me he’s something of a God at work. He’s rarely seen, holier than thou, and if he does any work it’s a bloody miracle! I’d now like to focus on the groom for a moment. Enjoy it, mate. After today, this is the last time you’ll ever be the center of attention. As the best man, it’s my job to talk about the groom’s qualities that make him a great partner. Unfortunately, I couldn’t think of any, so I just Googled ‘good qualities in a husband’ and read him the top ten list. When it came time for the Best Man speech, he pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and began reading about what a wonderful husband the Groom was going to be, how he was loyal, handsome, kind, how he was loved by everyone, etc… Then, the Best Man squinted at the paper, stumbled over the words, then turned to the Groom, handed him the paper and announced, “I can’t read your handwriting!” We are gathered here today to remember and celebrate the life of {The Groom} and while we mourn that he was taken from us all too soon… Wait a minute… that’s for next week… gimme a minute to find today’s speech… I didn’t really want to do this, but I thought it might be the only chance I’ll get to have a meal and some drinks paid for by the Groom. Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I must inform you that I’ve had rather a heavy night and I’m still feeling a little fragile. Therefore please spare a thought and try not to clap and yelp too loudly during my speech, however tempting that might be. You’d think I’d know better than to be out boozing in the early hours just before a big wedding, but I don’t like to see (Groom’s name) drinking alone. Hello! I’m the groom’s best man. He told me if I do a good job today I can be the best man at his next wedding too. The best line I’ve heard in a best man speech: “Life is like a maze, full of twists and turns, ghosts chasing after you…”

Hilarious Best Man Speech Jokes

Ready to crack up the crowd? Our hilarious best man speech jokes will have everyone in stitches. Get ready for a speech that’s pure fun!

Being asked to be someone’s best man is like being called up for jury duty. You don’t really want to do it but know you have to. You’re made to dress snappy and pretend to be an upstanding member of the community. The only difference is I didn’t have a say in the life sentence passed earlier today. Don’t worry my speech won’t take too long today, because of my throat. The bride has threatened to cut it if I go on for too long. And the groom has threatened to cut it if I mention anything about the bachelor party. I spoke to both (groom and bride) before the Wedding and I asked (groom) what he was looking for in Marriage – he said “Love, happiness and a long life together.” When I asked (bride) the same question – she replied – A coffee perculator! When I was younger, my brother (the Groom) used to push me down the stairs, ridicule me in front of our family and friends, and beat me up on a daily basis. Finally, after 20 years, he finally realized who the best man is. Get serious and do the first couple sentences of the president’s speech from Independence Day. I had 6 feet of (pretend) notes rolled up and folded in my pocket. When I started the speech at my wedding, I told everyone I just wanted to say a few short words and then let the notes roll down to the floor. I never thought I’d meet someone who cares about what other people thought as much as my sister… until I met my husband. Wait for laughs. This is from an intentionally bad MoH speech by Rachel McAdam’s character in Wedding Crashers I don’t believe in roasting the groom on his special day. Therefore this speech won’t contain anything embarrassing or controversial. Instead, I’ll refer only to the kind, funny side of his character. Thank you and goodnight. I have one final piece of advice for you two lovebirds: never stop laughing, even when the jokes are lame. As part of my research, I discovered that according to tradition I am supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and tell you all about his many good points. Well, I’m very sorry but I can’t sing and I won’t lie. It’s time for me to do this speech I hurriedly scribbled down about an hour ago! I always knew the Groom’s speech would be hard to follow. In fact, I couldn’t understand a word of it. What a pleasure it is to be Best Man at this wedding. The Groom made me compete for this honour today, but I was able to beat the Bartender over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am! I think we can all agree that it’s been a fantastic day. But unfortunately that ends right here with my speech. I’d like to begin my speech by giving the happy couple some relationship advice, but unfortunately I’m single and spend most of my time trying to coax my cat into little outfits/browsing Doctor Who fan sites/playing Rock Paper Scissors with Alexa. Guys, before I start, just some housekeeping notes, the venue has asked that you don’t stand on any of the chairs and tables for my standing ovation. A good marriage is like a casserole: only those responsible for it really know what goes into it. Now I have a few cards to read out from those who couldn’t make it today. There was one time when (groom) was asked, ‘What is (bride)’s favourite flower?’ To which he had no hesitation in replying, ‘Self Raising!’ ‘What makes a good wife?’ ‘One who helps her husband with the washing up!’ And, ‘What’s the last thing you’ll say to you wife before going to sleep?’ ‘It doesn’t matter what I say, you’ll buy it anyway.’ At my twin brother’s wedding I opened with: “When I first met the Groom I didn’t really like him. He was always crowding my space and stealing my nutrients, but after we busted out of that uteran prison we were perpetual partners in crime… I was the MC at my sister’s wedding. At the time I was wearing my hair in a mohawk but most of the guests were pretty conservative. I had just re-shaved the sides of the hawk on the morning of the wedding so it looked brand new. I started my speech by telling the large crowd of guests (about 500 people) that they were giving out free haircuts in an alley behind the building. I got some good laughs. A little bit of self depreciating humor definitely helped get the laughter I needed to ease my worries about doing a good job for my sister and her new husband. You’ve all been the victim of an elaborate prank. Firstly, I’d just like to say how nervous I am to be making this speech. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve stood up from a warm seat with warm pieces of paper in my hand today. I heard there was a sweep stake on the length of the best man’s speech. I just went for 35 minutes – so settle in… Leading up to today (the groom and bride) were having an issue with the seating plan. Who would sit comfortably in here and who would have to get up and stand during the speeches so we decided to use a wedding present list, the biggest presents at the front and work it back from there.

Short Best Man Speech Jokes

Quick laughs, big impact! Our collection of short best man speech jokes will make your speech memorable without dragging on.

We’ve reached the moment in the evening where we get to watch the groom figet and worry in anticipation. Yes, everyone, I’ve been asked by the staff to give him the bill. I just heard there was a lucrative pool on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 40 minutes, so settle in… My name is Peter and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but shut up – I know your secrets. My speech today will be like a mini-skirt.  Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention! Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen – Before I came here today one of my good friends gave me some advice on giving this speech. He said think of it like walking through a nudist camp, it’s only hard for the first minute.   I read somewhere the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass to the happy couple! Sally is a bright, charming, wonderful woman, who deserves a good husband. It’s such a shame Harry swooped in before she could find one. I think the main reason we’ve lasted as friends all these years is because you’re geographically convenient…and you had a trampoline. Jack is the kindest friend anyone could ask for; a man whose philanthropy knows no bounds. ‘Generosity’ should be his middle name. He would do anything for me; like helping write a section of the best man speech because you forgot about it until late last night at the bar! Jack was in a pub when he proposed. No, really, it was actually very romantic – he got up on one knee. It’s strange to be giving a speech like this one, because my parents always told me that if I had nothing good to say about someone, I should just be quiet. So I’m the best man, although I think I was picked by default since the groom doesn’t really have any other friends. I can only say in my defense that Mike and I share a common sense of humor so if this speech is in anyway unfunny please “Feel Free to Blame Mike.” I’d also like to congratulate Keith on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it. John did tell me that the vicar was firmly against sex before marriage. However, Jane did assure him it would only take a couple of minutes. Rest assured though, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I’ve promised Dan and Anne that if there is anything slightly risqué, I’ll whip it out immediately … Although Ria did actually tell me Paul has always brightened up her life. Well, she actually said he never turned the lights off but it amounts to the same thing pretty much. I’ll try to keep my speech short, because every extra minute I speak is an extra minute’s delay in witnessing how the Groom’s dance lessons worked out. I do have to say though how lucky you are Dave, you’re leaving with a beautiful wife whom you love. And you, Miranda, you get to go home with such a nice new dress and beautiful bouquet of flowers, it’s great. Jill, you are an amazing woman who deserves a wonderful husband. And I promise you I won’t rest until I get to the bottom of what’s gone wrong here. Being asked to be the best man is about five minutes of glowing pride, followed by an eternity of panic and misery. Linda, I expect you had a similar experience when Paul asked you to be his wife. Speaking of Jane, I would like to say how beautiful she looks today in that fantastic dress …Dan likes it too, as he told me in the church it will blend in just nicely well with the rest of the kitchen. Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!” When I saw Linda heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.” Before proposing, Paul went to ask Linda’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing Paul took the hand that had spent 20 years fishing into his wallet! I recognize my place here; being best man at a wedding is like being the dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you say too much people start freaking out. If you can’t hear me in the back, let the silence in the front assure you that you’re not really missing out on anything. A Best Man is like a dog. You love him, care about him, and he’s only thrown up and ruined your upholstery twice. I would like to start by saying what a pleasure it is to be Best Man at Jack and Jill’s wedding. Jack made me compete for this honor today, but I was able to beat Mark the Bartender over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am! When I sat down to write this speech I Googled “perfect best man speech”, but you had to pay to read the examples and I didn’t think it was worth it, so I’m gonna wing it. I admit, I’m extremely nervous right now. As the people sitting near to me at the table can testify, it really is possible to smell fear.” I must admit, I’m not used to speaking in public. Until now I thought a toastmaster was a kitchen appliance. You know, it’s been said that being asked to be best man is like being asked to make love to Camilla Parker Bowles. It’s a great honor but you don’t really want to do it!

Best Man Speech Jokes One Liners

Nail the punchlines with our one-liners. These short and clever jokes are perfect for a speech that packs a punch without going on and on.

An unmarried man is incomplete, a married man is… finished. No, that came out wrong. Don’t worry my speech won’t take too long today, because of my throat. Sarah has threatened to cut it if I go on for too long. And Tom has threatened to cut it if I mention anything about the stag weekend in Liverpool. Sarah deserves a wonderful successful loving husband. Thank goodness Tom married her before she found one. The marriage ceremony, asks that couples take each other for better or for worse. Tom, in marrying Sarah you really couldn’t have done any better. Sarah in marrying Tom… it could be worse. When Tom met Sarah it was love at first sight. Pure and Simple. Sarah was pure and Tom was simple. A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong. Marrying Tom is like winning the lottery but never having any money for the rest of your life. Love is blind, only marriage opens your eyes. I love marriage. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. Marriage after kids is basically a ‘who’s more tired? competition. Marriage is easy. It’s basically just deciding what to watch on Netflix. Marriage is basically peeing with the door open and not caring. Marriage is essentially being able to watch another person eat chicken wings without feeling sick. Marriage is spending the rest of your life trying to get out of debt with someone. During your speech, ask the Groom to put his hand over the Bride’s; then joke that it’s the last time the Groom will have the ‘upper hand’. When the guest are applauding as you stand up just gesture for them to quieten down and say, ‘What a reception!’ Stand up. Remove a peach from your pocket and hold it up for everyone to see. Say ‘I’m sorry, there’s been a misunderstanding on my part. I have nothing else prepared.’ Sit back down. I am actually a little nervous doing this, luckily I already tested it in front of a tough crowd, down the local old-folks home, and I think it went down quite well. They all pissed themselves anyway. Rest assured though, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I’ve promised Tom and Sarah that if there is anything slightly risqué, I’ll whip it out immediately. Tom is a great guy and he will no doubt be a great husband. Any girl is safe with him. He never lets his hands wander, they’re far too busy holding on to his money.

Clean Best Man Speech Jokes

Keep it classy with our clean best man speech jokes. Add humor without making anyone uncomfortable. Your speech will be a hit without crossing any lines.

If there’s anybody here today who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you’ve just married [NAME OF THE GROOM]. Good evening. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan. Of course, I’m only joking. She went over the speech with me half an hour ago in the bar. It’s been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers. Being asked to be someone’s best man is like being called up for jury duty. You don’t really want to do it, but know you have to. You’re made to dress in a suit and pretend to be an upstanding member of the community. The only difference is I didn’t have a say if the life sentence passed earlier today. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Before I begin, I just want to apologise for not being an experienced public speaker. I’m probably going to spend most of the time looking at this piece of paper in my hands. Oh, it’s not my notes – it’s a picture of the triple vodka I’m going to down as soon as this is over. Firstly I’d like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I’ve stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand. I don’t believe in roasting the groom on his special day. Therefore this speech won’t contain anything embarrassing or controversial about Matt. Instead I’ll refer only to the kind, funny side of his character. Thank you and goodnight. Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, a great man… but that’s enough about me, I’m here to give a speech about Arthur! For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Sam and for those of those who do know me…I apologise. My full name is actually ‘Sam-would-you-like-a-drink’. For those of you who I chat to in the bar later, I’d appreciate it if you could use my full name. Please keep clapping and cheering to a minimum. I’m terribly hungover. I know, you shouldn’t drink the night before a wedding, but I couldn’t very well let the groom drink alone, could I? Now, before I start, the venue manger has asked me to request that, for reasons of health and safety, none of you get up on top of the chairs and tables during my standing ovation. I have no problem admitting to you all that I’m extremely nervous right now. And, as the people sitting near the front of the room can attest, it is actually possible to smell fear. Once you’ve opened the best man’s speech and given the guests an idea of the tone and also helped them relax, knowing that you’re not about to deliver a complete car crash of a speech, it’s time to get personal. Remember, the best man’s speech is mostly intended as an ode to the groom and your friendship and to give the guests an idea of what the main man at the wedding is really like behind closed doors! You can also include some jokes about the bride (or another groom at a same-sex wedding), although keep these minimal as the father of the bride will have spent a large part of his speech talking about his daughter. As well as these tried-and-tested quips, try to include a few jokes that are specific and personal to your friend, to ensure the groom and his guests feel like you do actually know and love him! So where do I start about Ben? Well, for starters he’s handsome, witty, intelligent, he’s charm…sorry… Ben, I’m having trouble reading you handwriting. You can tell me the rest later. The bride and groom have asked that I don’t talk about Mike’s mishaps, mistakes, embarrassing moments or ex-girlfriends. So thanks for listening everyone, that’s it from me! Helen please put your left hand flat on the table. Paul please place your hand on top of hers. Enjoy this moment Paul because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand. We all know the bride is a wonderful lady who deserves the perfect guy. Too bad you don’t always get what you deserve. Well, I do hope that Meghan and Harry enjoy their honeymoon in Wales. I assume that’s where they’re going anyway… When I asked Harry what he was doing after the wedding, he said he was going to Bangor for a fortnight. I’ve been instructed by the bride and groom to keep this speech smut-free, so if I come across any innuendo, I’ll whip it out immediately. Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff online. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until I told him the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press. Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions! When I saw Kate heading up the aisle with her father, I thought “At last she’s seen sense, and got herself a man with looks and money.” Before proposing, William went to ask Kate’s father for her hand in marriage. He said that it was fine by him, providing William took the hand that had spent 25 years fishing into his wallet. I’ve been asked by many how I’m going to cope with my best friend being married and spending all of his time loved up at home. I’m thrilled! I’ll finally be able to talk to women without him cramping my style.

Dirty Best Man Speech Jokes

Add a bit of spice! Our dirty jokes are just the thing to make your best man speech memorable. Keep it fun without going too far.

If there’s anybody here today who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you’ve just married. Everyone here who knows Sophie will know that she is a wonderful and kind person, who deserves a good husband. Thank god Theo married her before she found one. We’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the Groom shift uncomfortably in his seat and grip the tablecloth in nervous anticipation. That’s right, I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill. It’s been an emotional day, even the pussy is in tiers. I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on the length of the Best Man’s speech. I put my money on 45 minutes, so settle in… My name is James and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but you’d do well to keep quiet – I know your secrets. I’d like to congratulate the Groom on a truly magnificent speech. I always knew it would be hard to follow and I was right – I could hardly follow a word of it. I did ask for a microphone but was told one wasn’t available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence from the people at the front should reassure you that you’re not missing out on anything. I’ve been told I can’t get away with a few thank yous and a quick toast in this speech. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Unfortunately, I can’t sing and I won’t lie. You’ve got no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to today. After all the time I’ve been friends with the Groom, he has at long last admitted that I am in fact the best man. Firstly I’d like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I’ve stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand.

Best Man Speech Jokes for Friends

Make your friends laugh with jokes tailored just for them. Celebrate your friendship with humor that brings back shared memories and inside jokes.

If there’s anyone here feeling nervous, apprehensive, and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, I’m right there with you! I’m not a professional stand-up comedian, but I’m a natural public speaker when it comes to talking about my best friend. I’ve been worried about giving this speech for a while now. Fortunately, last night I slept like a baby – waking up every two hours and bawling my eyes out. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-ager of this speech. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-icurist for this groom’s facial hair. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-servant for this groom’s needs. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-nequin for this groom’s style. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s brain. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s sense of humor. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own name. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own wedding date. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own phone number. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own social security number. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own password. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own email address. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own street address. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own shoe size. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own height. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own weight.

Best Man Speech Jokes about the Groom

Bring a smile to everyone’s face by poking fun at the groom. Share funny stories and good-natured jokes that showcase your bond with the man of the hour.

I’ve known the groom for many years, and I have to say, he’s always been a bit of a wild card. But now that he’s settling down, I think we can all breathe a sigh of relief. The groom is a great guy, but let’s be real, he’s not exactly the most organized person in the world. In fact, I’m pretty sure his dresser drawers still look like a black hole. I was surprised when the groom asked me to be his best man. I mean, we’ve had our differences over the years, but I guess he figured I owed him one after all the times he bailed me out of trouble. The groom has always been a bit of a ladies’ man, but I’m happy to see that he’s finally found someone who can keep up with him. Or should I say, someone who can tolerate him? I remember when the groom first told me he was getting married, my reaction was ‘Who’s the poor girl?’ But then I met the bride and realized she’s actually a saint. The groom is a bit of a thrill-seeker, so I’m surprised he didn’t try to pull off some crazy stunt during the ceremony. Like skydiving into the church or something. I’ve heard marriage described as a journey, and if that’s true, the groom is definitely the driver. And we all know how dangerous it is to ride shotgun with him. The groom is a master of the art of procrastination. I’m pretty sure he wrote his vows five minutes before the ceremony started. I’ve known the groom since we were kids, and back then, he was always getting into trouble. So, it’s nice to see that some things never change. The groom is a bit of a hopeless romantic, which is why he’s always been drawn to girls who are way out of his league. Luckily, he finally found one who’s perfect for him – even if she does have to put up with his crap. I’m not saying the groom is lazy, but I’m pretty sure he’d rather play video games than do just about anything else. Including his job. The groom has always been a bit of a risk-taker, which is why he’s had more near-death experiences than anyone I know. But somehow, he always manages to come out unscathed. I’ve seen the groom cry exactly twice in my life: once when his favorite team lost the championship game, and again when he saw the bride walk down the aisle today. The groom is a bit of a goofball, which is why he always makes us laugh. Even when he’s not trying to be funny, he usually ends up being the life of the party. I’ve known the groom long enough to know that he’s always been a bit of a rebel. So, it’s no surprise that he’s marrying such an amazing woman who’s not afraid to break the rules. The groom is a bit of a perfectionist, which is why he’s always been a bit of a pain to deal with. But somehow, he managed to find a bride who’s even more particular than he is. I’m not saying the groom is cheap, but I’m pretty sure he’d rather eat ramen noodles every night than spend money on fancy dinners. The groom is a bit of a control freak, which is why he’s always been a bit of a difficult friend to have. But somehow, he’s managed to find a bride who’s willing to put up with his crap. I’ve seen the groom get angry maybe twice in my life. Once when someone took the last slice of pizza at a party, and again when the bride tried to steal the spotlight during their engagement photoshoot. The groom is a bit of a dreamer, which is why he’s always chasing after impossible goals. But somehow, he always manages to make them happen.

Best Man Speech Jokes about the Bride

Spread the love with jokes about the bride. Keep it sweet and affectionate to make her feel special and cherished on the big day.

I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite color. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite food. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite movie. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite book. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite song. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite TV show. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite hobby. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s favorite sports team. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first date with him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first kiss with him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first argument with him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first fight with him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first breakup with him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first proposal from him. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding dress. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding ring. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding vows. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding dance. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding night. I’m not just the best man, I’m also the best man-neurologist for this groom’s ability to remember his own bride’s first wedding anniversary. I’ve known the bride for a few years now, and I have to say, she’s always been a mystery to me. But now that she’s marrying my buddy here, I realize she’s not so mysterious after all – she’s just a sucker for a good love story. The bride is a bit of a perfectionist, which is why she’s always been a bit of a nightmare to plan events with. But I have to admit, she’s pulled off the perfect wedding day so far. I was a little worried when the bride said she wanted to incorporate her beloved cat into the wedding ceremony. But I have to say, that cat gave a hell of a reading. The bride is a bit of a fashionista, which is why she’s been planning her wedding day outfit for months. But honestly, I think she looks beautiful no matter what she’s wearing. I’ve heard that marriage is all about compromise, so I have a suggestion for the bride and groom: whenever they disagree, they should just flip a coin. Heads, he wins. Tails, she wins. And vice versa. The bride is a bit of a foodie, which is why she insisted on having a seven-course meal at the reception. But honestly, I think we could have gotten away with just serving pizza and beer. I’ve known the bride since we were kids, and I have to say, she’s always been a bit of a wild child. But I’m glad to see she’s finally found someone who can tame her. The bride is a bit of a romantic, which is why she’s always been a sucker for cheesy love songs. But I have to admit, I teared up a bit during their first dance. I was a little skeptical when the bride said she wanted to have a unity sand ceremony instead of a unity candle. But honestly, it was really touching – especially when the sand got everywhere and we had to sweep it up afterwards. The bride is a bit of a bookworm, which is why she’s always got her nose buried in a novel. But I have to say, I think she’s found her match in the groom – he’s always got his nose buried in his phone. I’ve seen the bride stress out over tiny details before, but this time around, she’s been surprisingly calm. Either she’s found inner peace, or she’s just resigned herself to the fact that nothing will ever be perfect. The bride is a bit of a movie buff, which is why she’s always quoting lines from her favorite films. But honestly, I think she’s found her own happily ever after right here. I’ve known the bride since college, and I have to say, she’s always been a bit of a party animal. But I’m glad to see she’s finally found someone who can keep up with her – or at least, try to. The bride is a bit of a neat freak, which is why she’s always tidying up after everyone else. But honestly, I think she’s found her soulmate in the groom – he’s always making messes for her to clean up. I’ve seen the bride get emotional before, but this time around, she’s been remarkably composed. Either she’s been taking meditation classes, or she’s just excited to finally get hitched. The bride is a bit of a history buff, which is why she’s always dragging us to museums and historical landmarks. But honestly, I think she’s found her own piece of history right here. I’ve known the bride since high school, and I have to say, she’s always been a bit of a drama queen. But I have to admit, she’s put on the best show I’ve ever seen today. The bride is a bit of a travel enthusiast, which is why she’s always planning her next adventure. But honestly, I think she’s found her home right here – at least, until they decide to move to Timbuktu.

Final Thoughts

To wrap it up, nailing a fantastic best man speech is like a secret mission, and the right jokes are your superpower.

We have provided the best man speech jokes as a toolkit to keep everyone laughing.

Whether you prefer quick zingers or heartwarming tales, these jokes for the best man speech are gold.

Tell us your favorites or share any hidden gems we might’ve missed – drop a comment below and keep the good vibes rolling!

Post navigation

candy-jokes

154 Hilarious Candy Jokes That Blend Sweetness with Humor

  • April 2, 2024

computer-jokes

268 Hilarious Computer Jokes That Blend Tech with Laughter

Leave a comment, leave a reply cancel reply.

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

good one liners for best man speech

Your cart is empty

Please select all times before proceeding

Top Best Man Speech Openers For Every Style

  • 14th Apr, 2020

Jump to the good bits

Top Best Man Speech

You’re honoured to have been asked to be the best man but you’ve got no idea how to start your speech. We get it…your best man speech opener is the icebreaker your audience have all been waiting for. They’re tired, they want food and they want you to sit down quickly. So this is your chance to get them on side, have some fun and create a special/hilarious wedding speech moment that the bride and groom will laugh at, love and remember.

Keep our top tips in mind for your speech intro, length and tone and then head onto the jokes / opening lines / icebreakers!

  • Don’t focus on you.
  • Keep it under 5 minutes (3 is better).
  • Tell a short anecdote about the couple that celebrates (and maybe ribs) their relationship.
  • And finally, choose 1 or 2 good jokes that showcase your humour and the tone of the day.

So, without further ado…we give you our top 40 best man speech intros, jokes and openers.

Best Man Speech Openers

  • Step 1: Inhale helium balloon. Step 2: Give speech.
  • “History really does have a way of repeating itself. X years ago, (bride’s name)’s parents were sending her off to bed with a dummy. And today they’re doing it all over again.”
  • “(Bride’s name), you’re a truly special woman and you deserve a wonderful husband. And I’m not going to rest until I get to the bottom of what’s gone wrong here.”
  • “Fornication…..(cough) sorry, excuse me. For an occasion….such as this…”
  • “Just some quick housekeeping, ladies and gentleman. Firstly, if you’ve got your mobile phone on you…please make sure to keep it switched ON during the speech, for your own entertainment. And secondly, if you see any good jokes in your scrolling, be sure to forward them on to me.”
  • “I’d like to offer a toast to the bride and groom…(pull out a piece of toast from coat pocket and give it to them).”
  • “Those of you that know me, know that I’m not big on making speeches”…(Sit down)
  • “I have been (groom’s name)’s mate since Wednesday this week. I was the successful applicant to an ad he put online asking to pose as his friend. Apparently I got the position by default having been the only one to apply.”
  • “Some of you have asked me how I’ll cope now that I’m flying solo socially without my best mate…Honestly? I’m thrilled. Now I’ll finally be the best looking man in the room.”
  • If you are the groom’s twin: “I’m not the groom but I do appreciate that at least 4 people so far have congratulated me. Also, if you gave me an envelope, I’m keeping it.”
  • For the Princess Bride fans out there: “Mawwage. Mawwage is what bwings us together today…”
  • “The bride and groom have requested that I don’t share any embarrassing stories, stag do pranks or crude jokes…so that’s it from me! Thanks for your attention.”
  • “Now, ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate something beautiful. Something so truly magical that words can hardly express. I am, of course, talking about the open bar/donut wall/4 course meal.”
  • If you’re following someone else’s speech: “Ditto.”
  • “(Bride’s name) please put your hand flat on the table. (Groom’s name) please place your hand on top of hers. Now, enjoy this moment (groom’s name), because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand.”
  • “To the bride and groom. My only wish for you is that each day of your marriage is better than the previous, so that you can look back on today, your wedding day, and say that it was the worst day of your life.”
  • “For those of you who can’t hear me at the back, you should be reassured by the complete silence in the front row here. You’re not missing much.”
  • “Most of you know the bride well and that she is a loving and caring person. She deserved to find someone truly special to marry. I just thank God (groom’s name) married her before she found one.”
  • “A wedding is such an emotional day for everyone. Even the cake is in tiers.”
  • “When (groom’s name) first told me he was thinking about popping the big question, I have to admit my heart started racing. Then I realised he meant (bride’s name) and I just put those dreams back in the box.”
  • “(Groom’s name) said that If I do a good job here I can be the best man at his next wedding.”
  • “I did a quick poll before the reception today to see who was on the bride or groom’s side. And I’m happy to report that the wedding crashers are seated on tables 2 and 11. Security.”
  • For 2nd weddings only: “Welcome back.”
  • “Now, I know I can trust you all that any personal details I tell you about (groom’s name) today won’t go any further than the 150 guests in this room, your families, friends, workmates, casual acquaintances and anyone you choose to share them with on social media and the local radio call in show.”
  • “I’d like to start by congratulating (groom’s name) on his excellent taste in best men. He’s truly outdone himself this time.”
  • For Lord of The Rings (LOTR) fans: “Looking out I see a lot of familiar faces, and a lot of faces that are new to me. I don’t know half of you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.”
  • “When (groom’s name) asked me to be his best man, the first thing I did was Google ‘the perfect best man speech’, but you had to pay to read the examples and I didn’t think it was worth it, so I’m just going to wing it.”
  • “I did a lot of research before writing this speech and the best advice I came across was to open with something that’s relevant to everyone here. So, everyone…your cars have all been stolen.”
  • “(Groom’s name) knows his wife so well. When I asked him what her favourite flower was, he instantly replied ‘self-raising’.”
  • “Could I ask everyone to stand for a quick toast? There are some really important people who, without them, none of this here today would have any meaning…To the bartenders.”
  • “A wise man once told me that a best man speech is like a miniskirt. It should be short enough to be interesting, but long enough to cover the goods.”
  • “Hi everyone, I’m (your name). I’m here to tell you about (groom’s name) and how truly special, talented, good looking and…sorry mate, I can’t read your handwriting here.”
  • “Hi everyone, my name is (your name) and I’m (groom’s name)’s best man. That’s right. It took him (X) years but he has FINALLY admitted I’m the best.”
  • “Apparently, it’s tradition in a best man’s speech to sing the groom’s praises and talk up his better qualities. But sorry, I can’t sing and I won’t lie.”
  • “(Groom’s name) had the honour of being my best man. He took months crafting a perfect, tender and charming speech. It made the whole room laughing and crying in equal measure. Everyone agreed it was beautiful. Unfortunately I’m a married man, so I haven’t had the time to do all that.”
  • “I heard people were taking bets on the length of the best man speech. Well, I bet on myself for 45 minutes and I am sure as hell getting that money back. So, strap yourselves in…we’ll be here for a while.”
  • “I once read the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So the time has come! Please raise a glass to the happy couple!”
  • “The beautiful meal you’re about to be served was charged per head. So, on the special couple’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…”
  • “Before I start my speech, I think it would be appropriate if we all stood for a moment’s silence…To the memory of the 2,000 potatoes, 200 salmon, countless roses and baby’s breath flowers that selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding possible.”
  • “I would like to congratulate (groom’s name) on his impeccable taste in choosing such a beautiful wife. And (bride’s name), well done on saying ‘I do’ to my mate (groom’s name), because, let’s face it – that must have been hard.”

If you’ve given a truly epic best man speech that has gone down in wedding history, send us your speech text ! We’ll add any pearlers to the list or feature it on The Stag’s Balls blog.

For help with your other best duties and to plan the most epic stag party ever, check out our Irish , UK and European stag party destinations . And just reach out if you’d like to chat with a stag planner about options.

Image credit: Pxhere

Need help with your Stag Party?

If you’re in stag research mode, check out all of our stag party destinations and stag do ideas .

For help booking your stag weekend or to discuss your ideas, chat with us live during office hours, submit a quick enquiry or contact us for any other queries.

Article author

Picture of Ally Healy

Enquire about your stag plans

Related articles.

Stag Do Activity Ideas

51 Unforgettable Stag Do Activity Ideas

Stag do ideas for small groups including go karting

13 Inspiring Stag Do Ideas For Small Groups

A stag party group wearing mario brothers stag do costumes on a street abroad in Europe

15 Classic Stag Do Costumes and Fancy Dress Ideas

A best man holding a best man gifts to the groom in his hand

21 Top Ideas For Best Man Gifts To The Groom

Recent posts.

Stag Do Activity Ideas

The best stag party company and expert stag do planners in Ireland, the UK & Europe.

©2024 All Rights Reserved The Stag's Balls

  • How to book with us
  • Why book with us
  • Book a hen party
  • Become a supplier
  • Terms and conditions
  • Privacy policy
  • [email protected]
  • Ireland: (01) 524 1101
  • UK: (020) 3808 9546
  • Dublin Office: DogPatch Labs, ChQ Building, Dublin 1, D01 Y6H7
  • Wexford Office: 89 North Main Street, Wexford, Ireland, Y35 A3XK

We use cookies to provide a better website experience. More details in our privacy policy .

You have javascript switched off. This site works better with javascript switched on.

good one liners for best man speech

Ultimate Guide to Crafting the Perfect Best Man Speech: 75 Examples to Inspire You

May 29, 2024

Ultimate Guide to Crafting the Perfect Best Man Speech: 75 Examples to Inspire You

  • Founder of Bridesmaid for Hire
  • Creator of the #1 Speech & Vow Writing Tools
  • Author of Always a Bridesmaid (for Hire)
  • Creator of 1-800-Bridesmaid

Hi! I'm Jen Glantz

Hi, Friend!   Jen Glantz here. I’m a bestselling author, the first ever bridesmaid for hire and have written over 1000 best man speeches for people all around the world! Let’s dive into some best man speech  examples to get you inspired for your own!

This blog provides 75 best man speech examples to inspire you, along with tips for personalizing them.

Whether you’re a jokester, a storyteller, or a man of few words, you’re sure to find a style that suits you.

By the end, you’ll be delivering a toast for the ages that will leave the bride, groom, and guests laughing, crying, and clinking their glasses.

Before we dive in, know that  Bridesmaid for Hire  is here to help along the way:

  • Here’s more in-depth guidance on how to write a best man speech .
  • We also have a popular  best man speechwriting tool  that writes you a personalized toast in minutes.
  • Finally, our  best man speech coaching sessions   teach you ditch shaking hands and best man jokes that don’t land so you can give a confident best man speech.

Ready to nail your best man speech? Let’s dive in!

best man speechwriting tool

Table of Contents

TL;DR: Key Takeaways

  • Choose a best man speech example that matches your personality, relationship to the groom, and comfort level with public speaking.
  • Consider the wedding atmosphere and audience when selecting tone and content.
  • Keep it concise, usually under 5 minutes.
  • Balance humor with sincerity.
  • Practice extensively for confident delivery.
  • When in doubt, speak from the heart.

Considerations for Choosing Best Man Speech Examples

Not all best man speeches are created equal. What kills at a bachelor party may bomb at a conservative family wedding. Before diving into our extensive list of examples, let’s cover some key factors to help you choose wisely for your specific situation.

Considerations for Choosing Best Man Speech Examples

Criteria for Selection of a Best Man Speech Example

Authenticity.

First and foremost, your speech needs to sound like it comes from you . Don’t force yourself to be a standup comedian if that’s not your style. The most memorable speeches incorporate personal stories, inside jokes, and your genuine emotions about the groom and couple. If it feels fake or forced, scrap it.

Audience Appropriateness

You may have hilarious stories about the groom’s wild frat boy days, but Grandma Ethel probably doesn’t need to hear them. Keep the content classy and relatable to all ages. Avoid too many inside jokes that will alienate people. And definitely don’t spill any embarrassing secrets or bring up the groom’s ex-girlfriends!

Keep it short and sweet. Aim for 3-5 minutes. Any longer and you risk losing the audience’s attention or delaying dinner. If you have a lot of content, ruthlessly edit it down to the essentials. It’s always better to leave them wanting more.

Are you going for laugh-out-loud funny, sentimental and nostalgic, or a mix of both? Consider the overall vibe of the wedding and match your tone accordingly. A lighthearted roast may work for a relaxed backyard bbq wedding, while a black tie affair calls for a more eloquent approach. When in doubt, keep it classy.

Every great speech has a beginning, middle, and end. Start by introducing yourself, then launch into a few anecdotes or memories of the groom. Express how happy you are for the couple and what an honor it is to be Best Man. Wrap it up with well wishes for a long and happy marriage. Close with a toast that gets everyone to raise their glass.

best man speech template guide

Key Factors to Know before picking a Best Man Speech Example

Preparation time.

Don’t wait until the last minute to write your speech. Give yourself at least a few weeks to brainstorm, write an outline, and practice. The more prepared you are, the more confident you’ll feel during delivery.

Confidence and Delivery

No matter how well-written your speech is, the delivery can make or break it. Practice extensively in front of a mirror, friends, or family members. Record yourself to see how you sound. Watch your body language and eliminated any nervous tics like fidgeting or saying “um.” Speak slowly, clearly, and with enthusiasm.

Emotional Balance

Weddings are emotional events and it’s okay to show your sentimental side. That said, inside jokes and memories should be balanced out with more general content that everyone can enjoy. Avoid getting too mushy or you risk losing the audience. Save the tears for the hugs after.

Now that you’re armed with the key considerations for selecting and delivering your speech, let’s dive into the good stuff – the examples! The following 75 speeches are grouped into four categories: Funny, Short, Sentimental, and Unique & Creative. Browse the categories that best fit your vibe and relationship.

Quick Resources:

  • Use our best man speech generator.   Write an engaging best man speech that’s guaranteed to be memorable (for the right reasons).
  • Book a 30-minute speech delivery session . Get expert help on how to deliver your speech so the jokes land and the audience listens.
  • Read our best man speech guide . Get all the details, in one place, on what to include in your best man speech.

Best Man Speech Examples Categorized

Funny best man speech examples, best man speech example 1: the comedic roast.

Welcome everyone! For those of you who don’t know me, I’m the brother John never had… because he had me instead! John and I go way back. So far back that I have photographic evidence of the horrendous bowl cut his mom gave him in 3rd grade. Don’t worry John, I won’t show them… yet. John was always the responsible one, making sure I didn’t get into too much trouble. But there was this one time in college, when John decided to let loose. He streaked through the quad wearing nothing but his girlfriend’s skirt! Luckily that girlfriend is now his lovely wife, so she’s already well aware of what she’s getting into. All joking aside, John is one of the most stand-up guys I know. He’s always been there for me, through thick and thin. And I know he’ll be an incredible husband because I’ve seen firsthand how he treats Sarah. The love and respect they have for each other is truly inspiring. Sarah, you’re a lucky woman. John may not be much to look at, but you’ll never find a more loyal and loving partner. Please join me in toasting the happy couple! To John and Sarah, may your love be modern enough to survive the times, but old-fashioned enough to last forever. Cheers! Customize your funny best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 2: The Storyteller

I’ve known Ethan since we were five years old. Even back then, he was the sweetest kid on the playground, always sharing his fruit snacks and defending anyone being bullied. That’s the kind of stand-up guy Ethan is. Fast forward to high school, and not much had changed. Ethan was still everyone’s best friend. But he was also an incredible athlete. I’ll never forget the time he scored the winning touchdown at our Homecoming game. The crowd went wild, and all the cheerleaders wanted his attention at the dance afterwards. But Ethan only had eyes for one girl – his high school sweetheart and now bride, Ava. I asked Ethan when he knew Ava was the one. He told me it was on their first date. He had saved up for weeks to take her out to a nice restaurant. But when they got there, Ethan realized he had forgotten his wallet! Ever the gentleman, he offered to wash dishes in the back to pay for their meal. And what did Ava do? She put on an apron and said “I’ll dry.” That’s when Ethan knew she was a keeper. Ava, thank you for continuing to be Ethan’s rock and biggest cheerleader. Ethan, thank you for continuing to be the amazing man we all know and love. I wish you both a lifetime of happiness, laughter, and teamwork. Let’s raise our glasses! To Ethan and Ava – proof that true love isn’t just in fairy tales. Cheers! Customize your funny best man speech now >>

best man speech example funny

Best Man Speech Example 3: The One-Liner Specialist

Hi everyone, I’m Patrick – Tom’s best friend and the one who gets to spill all his most embarrassing secrets today! Just kidding, I would never do that… again. Tom and I have been through a lot together. From our first little league team, to being college roommates, to co-founding our company. We’ve definitely seen each other at our best… and worst. Like the time Tom walked into an important investor meeting with toilet paper stuck to his shoe. He really knows how to make a first impression! But in all seriousness, Tom is the kind of friend everyone needs in their corner. He’s a great listener, gives the best advice, and is always down for an adventure, even if it’s just trying a new food truck downtown. And now he’s found his perfect match in Lisa. Lisa, I’ll never forget when Tom first told me about you. He had that classic “Tom in love” puppy dog look. But as he started sharing stories about your hiking trips, cooking experiments, and laid-back approach to life, I knew you were the yin to his yang. You both just “get” each other in a way that’s rare and special. As Tom’s best man, I’m supposed to give you marriage advice. But the truth is, you two don’t need it. Your love is easy, fun, and unbreakable – just like our friendship. Though I do recommend investing in some good ear plugs, because Tom’s snoring could wake the dead! Let’s toast to the perfect pair! Tom and Lisa, may your marriage be as strong as Tom’s haggard dance moves, and as sweet as Lisa’s homemade cinnamon rolls. Congrats you crazy lovebirds! Customize your funny best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 4: The Prop Comedian

When Ryan first asked me to be his best man, I was honestly a little surprised. Not because I’m not honored, but because Ryan is one of the most meticulous planners I know. I figured he would have sent me a 10-page best man handbook with diagrams! But all joking aside, Ryan’s organization and attention to detail are just a couple of the many qualities I admire about him. He’s hardworking, loyal, and always up for a good time. Though sometimes that good time involved a few too many shots of tequila, as evidenced by this sombrero from our trip to Cabo! [hold up sombrero prop] Over the years, I’ve watched Ryan navigate the ups and downs of life with poise and determination. From acing his MCAT exams, to securing his dream residency, to buying his first house, he’s always had a plan and followed through. But there was one thing Ryan couldn’t seem to get a handle on – his love life. He was unlucky in love for a while there, enduring a string of bad Tinder dates and awkward set-ups. But that all changed when he met Mia. From the moment Ryan told me about the beautiful, whip-smart lawyer he met at a work conference, I knew she was the one. The way his eyes lit up when he talked about their spirited debates, shared love of sushi, and dreams of traveling the world together – it was unlike anything I’d seen from him before. And when I finally met Mia, I understood why. Her warmth, humor, and beauty immediately put you at ease. She was the yin to Ryan’s yang. Over the past three years, I’ve watched Ryan and Mia’s relationship blossom into something truly special. They challenge each other intellectually, support each other emotionally, and make each other laugh constantly. And now they’re making the ultimate commitment in front of all their loved ones. So Ryan, [put on stethoscope prop] my diagnosis is that you’re one lucky man. You found the love of your life and best friend in Mia. And Mia, [put on judges gavel prop] the evidence shows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that you’re the only one who can keep Ryan in line! [raise glass] Join me in toasting the brilliant bride and groom! Ryan and Mia, may your marriage be filled with love, laughter, and plenty of sushi dates. Thanks to you two, I finally believe in soulmates. L’chaim! Customize your funny best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 5: The Improv Artist

Hi everyone, I’m Daniel, Jake’s brother from another mother and partner in crime…but don’t tell our parents that last part! You know, standing up here, it all feels a bit surreal. It seems like just yesterday Jake and I were making mud pies in the backyard and betting on how many marshmallows we could fit in our mouths. For the record, it’s ten. We still have the polaroids somewhere… Jake has always been the ride-or-die kind of brother. The kind who bails you out when you crash Dad’s car, but never lets you live it down. The kind who knows all your most embarrassing secrets, but keeps them under lock and key…for a price. The kind who’s always up for an adventure, whether it’s backpacking through Europe or just seeing how many free samples you can snag at Costco. So when Jake met Sophie, I was curious to see what kind of girl could tame my wild big bro. Turns out, Sophie is just as adventurous and fun-loving as Jake. But she’s also his perfect counterbalance. She’s the voice of reason to his impulsivity, the calm to his storm, the one who makes sure he looks before he leaps…at least most of the time. I remember when Jake called me after their first date. He described this epic 12-hour day that included brunch, an escape room, paddle boarding, hibachi, and late night karaoke. He was practically gasping for air recounting it all. I asked him what they could possibly do for a second date after that. Without skipping a beat he said “I’m going to marry her.” And here we are. Customize your funny best man speech now >>

best man speechwriting tool

Short Best Man Speech Examples

Best man speech example 6: the concise complimenter.

Good evening everyone. I’m honored to be here tonight as Parker’s best man. Parker is a true gentleman – kind, intelligent, and always putting others before himself. He deserves the very best in life, and he’s found that in his beautiful bride Isabel. Isabel, you are Parker’s perfect match in every way. You share the same core values of integrity, generosity, and love of community. It’s been a joy to watch the two of you grow together and create a relationship that is built on a foundation of friendship, respect, and unwavering support. Parker and Isabel, your love for each other shines through in everything you do. I know you will continue to lift each other up and bring out the very best in one another. May the joy and love you feel today be with you always. Let’s raise a glass to the happy couple! Customize your short best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 7: The Poetic Toast

A toast to my brother of another and the light of his life: A union like yours is very rare. In your togetherness, you find strength. In your passion, you find peace. Connected by an unbreakable friendship, You are two souls that shine more brightly together than apart. Jonathan and Miranda, as you become one today, Know that your love has already left a mark on us all. By your example, we are inspired. We are reminded what it means to love fully, Enthusiastically, and without reservation. As you embark on this new chapter, Know that you go forward with our full love and support. To a lifetime of happiness, Customize your short best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 8: The Quote Master

“The highest happiness on earth is marriage.” – William Lyon Phelps Kevin, truer words have never been spoken to describe the joy on your face today as you wed your soulmate, Jessica. Your love story is one for the ages – a serendipitous meeting at a coffee shop, a whirlwind romance that took you around the world, and now, a commitment to spend the rest of your lives together. As your best man and longtime friend, I couldn’t be happier to stand by your side today. I’ve watched you grow into the caring, responsible man you are, and I know you and Jessica will build a beautiful life together filled with laughter, adventure, and endless cups of coffee. Congratulations to you both. Never stop pursuing your dreams together. “Love recognizes no barriers.” – Maya Angelou Customize your short best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 9: The Heartfelt Haiku

Groom beaming with pride Bride glowing with love and joy Two hearts become one Adam, Melissa, your love radiates through this room and warms us all. May your marriage be blessed with that same light and warmth. Kanpai! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 10: The Brief Narrator

Boy meets girl. They become best friends. Best friends become soulmates. That’s the short version of Sam and Emma’s love story. But of course, there’s so much more to it. The late night talks, the inside jokes, the “I can’t imagine my life without you” moment. The proposal with the puppy. And now the wedding of the century, surrounded by everyone who loves you. Sam, you’re the kind of guy who would give someone the shirt off his back. And Emma, you’re the girl who makes everyone feel welcome and loved. Together, your generosity and care for others knows no bounds. So let’s raise a glass to the newlyweds. Sam and Emma, thank you for reminding us all about the power of love and the joy of finding your perfect teammate in life. May your marriage be a grand adventure filled with puppy snuggles. To the happy couple! Customize your best man speech now >>

Sentimental Best Men Speech Examples

Best man speech example 11: the emotional tribute.

Good evening everyone, I’m Patrick, Daniel’s little brother and best man. This is an emotional day for me, because I’ve always looked up to Daniel. He’s been my protector, my role model, my partner in crime…and today he’s the groom. Growing up, Daniel was my superhero. He stood up to my bullies, taught me how to throw a perfect spiral, and convinced me that broccoli would turn me green like the Hulk, which I still kind of believe. He was always in my corner, cheering me on and making me believe I could do anything. Daniel, as I stand here today I want you to know how proud I am to be your brother. You’re one of the bravest, most honorable men I know. An incredible son, sibling, friend, and now, husband. You’re my best man today and every day. And my new sister Chelsea, where do I begin? From the first time we met, it was clear you were Daniel’s perfect match. Your warmth, humor, and huge heart immediately put me at ease. I’ve loved getting to know you through the years and watching the incredible love you and Daniel share. You truly bring out the best in my brother. Thank you for loving him as fiercely as we do. As you two begin this new chapter, I wish you a lifetime of love, laughter, and broccoli. May you always be each other’s superhero. Join me in toasting the bride and groom! To Daniel and Chelsea! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 12: The Nostalgic Reminiscer

Jack and I go way back. All the way to Mrs. Murphy’s kindergarten class, with the finger painting and alphabet posters on the wall. Even at five years old, Jack was the guy everyone wanted to be friends with. He was kind, funny, and always up for sharing his 64-pack of crayons, which is how you knew he was a really good guy. Fast forward a few decades, and so much has changed… but Jack hasn’t. He’s still the most loyal, generous friend a guy could ask for. The one who’s by your side for every milestone. The one who’s got your back, no matter what. The one who gives the world’s best bear hugs. So when Jack met Priya, I knew she had to be someone truly special. And was she ever. Priya, you came into Jack’s life like a beam of sunshine. Your positive energy, sense of adventure, and heart of gold were a perfect complement to Jack’s steadiness and determination. Suddenly my 64-pack of crayons friend had a skip in his step and was smiling wider than I’d ever seen. I knew pretty quickly that what you two had was the real deal. Priya, thank you for loving Jack the way he deserves. For always being up for trying a new restaurant, or taking a last minute road trip, or hosting a legendary 4th of July BBQ. For understanding and appreciating all the things that make Jack so unique and wonderful. He’s the luckiest guy in the world. So let’s raise a glass to the happy couple! Jack and Priya, my wish for you is crayon-colored days, bear hug nights, and a lifetime of love and happiness together. May you always find home in each other’s arms. Cheers! Customize your best man speech now >>

best man speech example sentimental

Best Man Speech Example 13: The Romantic Realist

Hi everyone, I’m Nathan, Ethan’s best friend and best man. Now, you might be expecting me to tell you about all the crazy shenanigans Ethan and I got into over the years. Like the time we decided to road trip to Mexico on a whim, with no map and no plan. We ended up lost, sunburned, and out of gas in the middle of nowhere. But we also had the adventure of a lifetime, because that’s just how Ethan rolls. But as much as I love a good roast, that’s not why we’re here today. We’re here to celebrate something far more incredible – the love between Ethan and Ava. Now, I know what some of you might be thinking. Love is a many-splendored thing, right? All romance and roses and euphoric montages. But here’s the thing. Love is also a choice you make every single day. It’s a promise to be your partner’s bodyguard, cheerleader, and personal comedian, even when life gets messy. It’s being able to ugly cry in front of each other after a hard day and waking up the next morning knowing that person is still your favorite human. It’s committing to forever even when you’re dealing with job stress, dirty dishes, and really bad morning breath. That’s the kind of real deal love these two have. When I think about Ethan and Ava’s relationship, a few words come to mind. Friendship. Laughter. Adventure. Unwavering support. A rock-solid foundation to weather any storm. That’s what you’re signing up for today. And let me tell you, it’s worth it. Because when you find someone who makes you laugh until you pee a little, kisses your nose even when it’s runny, and promises to always be your co-pilot on the highway of life, you hold on tight and never let go. So Ethan and Ava, as you exchange rings today, know that your love inspires the rest of us. Not because of some cheesy rom-com fantasy, but because you’re a real couple, with real struggles, who choose each other every day, through better and worse. A couple who’s not just in love, but who IS love, in all its honest, messy, beautiful glory. Join me in toasting the bride and groom! Here’s to a lifetime of adventure, forgiveness, belly laughter, and really great sex. May you always be each other’s home. To Ethan and Ava! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 14: The Family Man

Hello everyone, my name is Andrew and I have the honor of being the best man today. I’m also Matt’s older brother, which means I have plenty of embarrassing stories to share! But I’ll save those for the next family reunion. In all seriousness, today is particularly emotional for me, because I’ve had a front row seat to Matt and Emily’s love story. I’ve watched my little brother grow from an awkward, video-game obsessed teenager into the confident, caring man he is today – and so much of that is thanks to Emily. From the first time Matt brought Emily home to meet the family, we knew there was something special about her. The way she jumped right in to help mom with the dishes, cracked dad up with her witty one-liners, and asked me thoughtful questions about my job – it was clear she wasn’t just a girlfriend, but a true partner. Over the years, Emily has become more than just a sister-in-law to me – she’s family. The kind of family who shows up, no questions asked. The kind who remembers every birthday, hosts the best Thanksgiving, and gives the warmest hugs. Matt, you really hit the jackpot with this one. And Emily, I want to thank you. Thank you for loving my brother the way he deserves. For seeing past his corny jokes and occasionally questionable fashion choices to the heart of gold underneath. For pushing him to be his best self while accepting him as he is. For being such an incredible daughter, sister, aunt, and friend to our crazy clan. We love you so much. So to Matt and Emily, as you formally become family today, I wish you a love as strong as mom and dad’s, a home filled with as much laughter as our childhood, and a marriage that makes you each feel as cherished as you are. May you always be each other’s haven and biggest fans. We love you! Everyone please raise your glass to Mr. and Mrs. [Last Name]! To Matt and Emily! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 15: The Inspirational Speaker

Good evening, friends and family. I’m David, the groom’s best man. When Raj asked me to stand up for him on his wedding day, I didn’t hesitate. Because if there’s one thing I know about Raj, it’s that he shows up for the people he loves. He shows up for the big things, the small things, and everything in between. And today, he’s showing up for the biggest commitment of all – marriage. I’ve known Raj for 20 years. We’ve been through a lot together – highs, lows, and a whole lot of cheap beer in between. But through it all, Raj has been a constant source of support, wisdom, and inspiration. He’s the friend who picks up the phone at 2am when you need to talk. The one who helps you move apartments in 100-degree heat. The one who never lets you give up on yourself, even when you want to. Raj: You live life with such passion and purpose. You don’t back down from a challenge. You stay true to your values. And you love with your whole heart. It’s no wonder that when Anjali came into your life, you knew pretty quickly she was your person. Anjali, you are a force of nature. Brilliant, driven, kind, and drop-dead gorgeous to boot. But what I admire most about you is your strength. The quiet kind of strength that powers through med school exams and overnight hospital shifts. The graceful kind of strength that juggles family responsibilities and your own aspirations. And the joyful kind of strength that lives life to the fullest. Raj is a lucky man. When I see you two together, I see a couple committed to building something meaningful, both in your marriage and in the world. I see best friends and true partners. I see two people who not only accept each other’s strengths and flaws, but actually love each other more because of them. So as you exchange vows today, I want to remind you that love isn’t just flowery words. It’s ACTION. It’s showing up, even when it’s not easy. It’s choosing compassion over being right. It’s growing together through change. It’s saying I love you, I’m here for you, I choose you, every single day. Raj and Anjali, never stop fighting for each other. Never stop challenging each other. Never stop finding new reasons to fall in love with each other. Because the world needs more couples like you – couples who lead with love. Join me in toasting the bride and groom! Raj and Anjali, thank you for letting us witness the incredible love you share. May you always be each other’s strength and inspiration. To a lifetime of showing up! Customize your best man speech now >>

Unique and Creative Best Man Speech Examples

Best man speech example 16: the musical maestro.

*best man takes the mic and breaks out into song* (To the tune of “I’ll Be There For You” by The Rembrandts) So no one told you life was gonna be this way (wedding bells chime 4x) Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, love life DOA Well, it hasn’t been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but… Ethan will be there for you (When the rain starts to pour) Natalie will be there for you (Like she’s been there before) They’ll be there for you (‘Cause you’re there for them too) *Ethan pulls the mic away, laughing* Alright, alright, I’ll spare you the rest of my pipes. But everything I said in that little ditty is true. Ethan and Natalie, you two are the real deal. I’ve seen you support each other through job losses, family dramas, and yes, even unfortunate haircuts. Seriously though, that frosted tips phase, bro? But all jokes aside, you two have something special. You’re not just lovers, you’re best friends. And yeah, marriage is a big, scary, wonderful adventure. But it’s so much better when you’ve got your person by your side. Natalie, thanks for making an honest man out of my boy. Ethan, thanks for being the kind of friend who feels more like family. I know you’ll both continue to be each other’s rocks, through all of life’s crazy plot twists. So, without further ado… *grabs the mic again* (To the tune of “Marry You” by Bruno Mars) It’s a beautiful night, we’re looking for something fun To celebrate this love that’s just begun Well I know this little chapel on the boulevard we can go No one will know Oh, come on, let’s go! I think they wanna marry each other! Sh*t, I know they wanna marry each other! Here’s the ring, it’ll fit like a glove, g-glove, glove You know it’s time you two say “I do”, yeah it’s true Who cares if we’re all dressed up, right? Got wedding cake, champagne for tonight (hey!) They want the rest of their lives To start as soon as possible It’s time, you two, let’s do the damn thing! I know they wanna marry each other! Please be upstanding for Mr. and Mrs. McNally! We love you, crazy kids! Cheers! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 17: The Tech-Savvy Speaker

Good evening ladies and gentlemen. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Josh, Alex’s best man and partner in crime since middle school. When Alex asked me to be his best man, I was thrilled, honored… and a little bit terrified. How could I possibly sum up a friendship that has spanned over half our lives? How could I put into words the incredible man that Alex is and the amazing husband I know he’ll be to Sophia? But then it hit me – a picture is worth a thousand words. Or in this case, an embarrassing Facebook memory is worth at least a solid 5 minutes of roasting. *pulls up old photo of groom on screen* Oh yes. This gem is from our sophomore year spring break trip. I’m talking bleached tips, puka shell necklace, the works. Alex, my man, what were we thinking? *flips through slideshow of funny photos of groom growing up* From questionable fashion choices to that time we thought we could start a boy band, Alex and I have been through it all together. But make no mistake, beneath the goofball exterior is one of the smartest most driven people I’ve ever met. This is the guy who taught himself to code in high school, who started his own successful tech company in college, and who never shies away from a challenge. Alex, your determination and resilience have always inspired me. *changes slide to collage of Alex and Sophia* And then you met Sophia. From the moment you two started dating, I watched my best friend become the best version of himself. Sophia, you are Alex’s perfect match in every way. Brilliant, compassionate, and an absolute knockout to boot. But beyond that, you two share a love that is truly special. The kind of love that evolves and grows stronger over time. *changes slide to interactive timeline of couple’s love story* In fact, feel free to scan the QR code in your programs to scroll through Alex and Sophia’s relationship milestones – from their first date at that quirky VR cafe to their epic around-the-world adventure last year. You two have built an incredible life together already, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds. *changes slide to heartfelt candid of couple* Alex and Sophia, as you enter this new chapter, I have no doubt that your marriage will be a beautiful one, filled with love, laughter, and all the latest and greatest tech gadgets. Because in a world of constant upgrades, you two have found something timeless – true partnership and unconditional love. Join me in raising a glass to the newlyweds! Alex and Sophia, may your love continue to be the one thing in life that never needs an update. We love you! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 18: The Theatrical Performer

*best man enters in a dramatic fashion* Welcome, welcome, one and all, to the wedding of the century! I am your host for the evening, the dashing, debonair, and undeniably humble best man, Luke. Now, you may be wondering, how did a specimen like myself end up with a best friend like Noah? Well, let me take you back to act one, scene one of our epic bromance. *lights dim, spotlight on Luke* It was a dark and stormy night… just kidding, it was a perfectly average day in 10th grade English class. I was the new kid, fresh meat, trying to find my place in the adolescent jungle. And there was Noah, the class clown with a heart of gold, cracking jokes and making even our grumpy teacher crack a smile. Long story short, we bonded over our mutual love of The Office and the rest is history. From late night study sessions fueled by energy drinks to road trip singalongs to “Bohemian Rhapsody”, Noah has been my partner in crime and my confidant. The Maverick to my Goose, the Ferris to my Cameron, the Patrick to my Spongebob. But little did Noah know, his real leading lady was waiting in the wings. Enter stage right: the luminous, hilarious, drop dead gorgeous Olivia. *gestures grandly to bride* From the moment these two met at that improv class freshman year of college, it was clear their love story was one for the ages. The way Olivia could match Noah’s wit and humor, the way Noah looked at Olivia like she hung the moon… it was like watching a real life rom-com unfold. *switches to sincere tone* But in all seriousness, Olivia, thank you. Thank you for loving my best friend the way he deserves. For seeing the caring, loyal, brilliant man beneath the class clown persona. Noah, thank you for showing me what a healthy, happy relationship looks like. You two are the real deal. So without further ado, I present to you the maîtres d’amour, the crème de la crème of couples, Mr. and Mrs. Thompson! *pulls bride and groom to their feet and into a group hug* Everyone join me in raising your glasses to the leading lady and man of the hour! Noah and Olivia, may your marriage be filled with love, laughter, and plenty of standing ovations. We love you! *cue end scene applause and music* Customize your best man speech now >>

Unique and Creative Best Man Speeches

Best Man Speech Example 19: The Cultural Celebrant

Namaste and good evening to the beloved friends and family of Priya and Aakash. I’m Rohan, the best man and pseudo-big brother to the groom. As many of you know, Aakash and I go way back – to the days of Little League cricket matches, weekend sleepovers filled with too much junk food and Bollywood movies, and of course, those awkward preteen years navigating our Indian-American identities together. Aakash, you have always been the yang to my yin. The rational to my impulsive, the calm to my chaos, the mild butter chicken to my spicy vindaloo. But through it all, you’ve been my constant. My fellow ABCD (American-born confused desi), my understanding ear, my brother from another mother. And then along came Priya. From your very first date, which Aakash was adorably nervous for, by the way – I knew she was something special. The way you talked about her smile, her intelligence, her passion for social justice – it was clear this was no ordinary crush. As I got to know Priya better, I saw how seamlessly she fit into Aakash’s life and our tight-knit community. Here was a woman who could hold her own in a heated debate on politics, rock a saree like a runway model, and make a mean biryani to boot. Aakash, you met your match. *Speaks a few lines in Hindi* Translation: When two hearts unite as one, their love shines brighter than a thousand suns. And today, we have the joy of witnessing the sacred union of Aakash and Priya, two souls who were destined to find each other. *Switches back to English* Priya and Aakash, as you embark on this new journey, I wish for your love to be like a beautiful Madhubani painting – intricate, vibrant, and steeped in tradition and devotion. May you always find refuge in one another, navigate life’s ups and downs as a team, and nurture a home filled with warmth, laughter, and the mouth-watering scent of spices. So family, please join me in raising a glass to the happy couple! To Priya and Aakash – a match made in the stars. May you forever dance through life to the beat of the dhol drum. We love you! To forever and always, Saat Phere ki jai ho! Customize your best man speech now >>

Best Man Speech Example 20: The Interactive Host

Alright, who’s ready to celebrate the life, love, and marriage of the one and only Isaac and Gabrielle? Come on now, I said ARE YOU READY?! *hypes up crowd* My name is Marcus and I’ve been Isaac’s best friend, wingman, and occasional voice of reason since our freshman year as roommates at Howard University. I’ve seen this man at his best, his worst, and everything in between. But through it all, one thing has remained constant – his incredible capacity to love. Isaac, my brother, you have the biggest heart of anyone I know. From our late-night talks about our dreams and fears, to the way you show up for your friends and family, to how you pour your soul into your music – you live and love fully. And then, in walks Gabrielle. This radiant, whip-smart, drop-dead gorgeous woman who just so happens to be Isaac’s perfect counterpart. When you two are together, it’s like watching poetry in motion. The laughter, the banter, the way you challenge and inspire each other to be better – it’s a beautiful thing to witness. *turns to crowd* But don’t just take my word for it – let’s hear from some of the other VIPs in their lives! By a show of applause, who’s got a favorite “Isaac and Gabrielle” moment to share? *selects a couple audience members to share stories* See? These two have built a love that is truly one-of-a-kind. A love that has already left an indelible mark on all of us gathered here. So I want to try something. Isaac, Gabrielle, will you join me up here for a second? *couple stands up* Alright y’all, on the count of three, I want everyone to shout out a word or short phrase that describes the love you see between these two. Ready? 1, 2, 3 – GO! *audience shouts out adjectives like “inspiring”, “soulmates”, “joyful”, “unbreakable”, etc.* Wow. Do you feel that energy? That, right there, is the power of your love. *turns to couple* Isaac and Gabrielle, never forget this moment. The love, the support, the sheer joy that surrounds you today. Bottle it up and save it for a rainy day. Let it be a reminder that no matter what life throws your way, you’ve got an army of loved ones cheering you on, and an unshakable foundation in each other. *raises glass* So family, let’s make some noise for the newlyweds one more time! Join me in toasting to a lifetime of love, laughter, and happily ever after. To Isaac and Gabrielle! *cues DJ to start the party with couple’s favorite song* Customize your best man speech now >>

things to say and not say in my best man speech

55 other Best Man Speech Examples – Coz why not?

1. the childhood best friend.

John and I have been best friends since we were in diapers. We’ve seen each other through all of life’s ups and downs, from learning to ride a bike to our first heartbreaks. I never thought I’d see the day when John would settle down, but then he met Sarah. Sarah, you’ve brought out the best in John and I couldn’t be happier to welcome you into our crazy little family. John, I love you like a brother and I wish you both a lifetime of happiness. Customize your best man speech now >>

2. The College Roommate

Mike and I were randomly assigned as college roommates freshman year, and let’s just say it was a bit of an adjustment period. Between Mike’s snoring and my late-night study habits, we definitely had our moments. But somewhere along the way, we became best friends. Mike, you’ve always been there for me, and I know you’ll be an amazing husband to Emily. Emily, thank you for loving Mike for who he is and for putting up with us crazy college boys. Cheers to a lifetime of love and happiness! Customize your best man speech now >>

3. The Older Brother

As Jack’s older brother, it’s my job to embarrass him a little bit today. But truthfully, there’s not much to embarrass him about. Jack has always been the kind of guy who puts others first, who works hard and loves deeply. And when he met Lisa, it was clear he had found his perfect match. Lisa, thank you for joining our family and for making Jack so incredibly happy. I wish you both all the love and joy in the world. Customize your best man speech now >>

4. The Younger Brother

Growing up, I always looked up to my big brother Chris. He was the cool one, the funny one, the one who always knew what to say. And while I may have been the annoying little brother at times, Chris never made me feel that way. Chris, you’ve been my role model and my best friend, and I’m so proud of the man you’ve become. Jess, you’re the sister I always wanted and I’m so happy to officially welcome you to the family. Here’s to a lifetime of love, laughter, and maybe a few more annoying little brother moments. Customize your best man speech now >>

5. The Fraternity Brother

When Steve joined our fraternity, I knew he was going to fit right in. He had a contagious laugh, a kind heart, and could outdrink pretty much anyone. Over the years, Steve has been more than just a frat brother to me – he’s been a true friend. And when he introduced me to Karen, I knew he had found someone truly special. Karen, thank you for being such an amazing partner to Steve and for putting up with all of us crazy frat guys. To Steve and Karen, may your love always be as strong as our brotherhood. Customize your best man speech now >>

6. The Co-Worker

When Mark joined our office, I knew we were in for a treat. His wit and humor brought a much-needed lightness to even the most stressful days, and his hard work and dedication were an inspiration to us all. Mark, you’ve been an amazing friend and colleague, and I’m so happy to be here celebrating your marriage to Julie. Julie, you are Mark’s perfect match in every way and I know you’ll bring each other so much happiness. Cheers to the happy couple! Customize your best man speech now >>

7. The Future Brother-In-Law

When my sister first introduced me to David, I’ll admit I was a little skeptical. No one was ever going to be good enough for my big sister in my eyes. But David, you quickly proved me wrong. Your love and respect for my sister were evident from day one, and I’ve watched you two build a beautiful life together. I’m so grateful to be gaining a brother today, and I couldn’t be happier for you both. To my sister and my new brother, may your love story be one for the ages. Customize your best man speech now >>

8. The High School Friend

Jason and I have been friends since high school, which means I’ve seen him through some pretty questionable fashion choices and hairstyles. But through it all, Jason has always been the best kind of friend – loyal, dependable, and always up for a good time. When he met Amy, it was like a lightbulb went off. Suddenly, Jason was more focused, more driven, and more content than I’d ever seen him. Amy, thank you for bringing out the best in Jason and for loving him as much as we all do. To the happy couple, may your love only grow stronger with each passing year. Customize your best man speech now >>

9. The Childhood Neighbor

Growing up next door to Matt was like having a built-in best friend. From catching frogs in the creek to late-night video game marathons, Matt and I did it all together. And while we may have grown up and gone our separate ways, our friendship has only gotten stronger. Matt, you’ve been a constant in my life and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Sarah, thank you for making Matt so incredibly happy and for fitting into our crazy little neighborhood crew so seamlessly. Here’s to a lifetime of love, laughter, and maybe a few more frog-catching adventures. Customize your best man speech now >>

10. The Sports Teammate

When you spend as much time together as teammates do, you really get to know a person. And let me tell you, Tom is one of the best guys I know. He’s hardworking, dependable, and always puts the team first. So when he met Emily, it was no surprise that he approached their relationship with the same dedication and commitment. Emily, thank you for being Tom’s biggest cheerleader and for supporting him both on and off the field. To Tom and Emily, may your love be a grand slam. Customize your best man speech now >>

11. The Work Spouse

In our office, Ryan and I were known as the work spouses. We finished each other’s sentences, knew each other’s coffee orders by heart, and could always count on each other for a good laugh or a listening ear. But as close as Ryan and I were, it was nothing compared to the bond he shared with Megan. Megan, you truly are Ryan’s other half and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. Thank you for being such an amazing partner and friend. To Ryan and Megan, may your love be as strong as our spreadsheets and as sweet as our morning coffee chats. Customize your best man speech now >>

12. The Cousin

Growing up, Andrew and I were more like brothers than cousins. We spent every summer together at the family lake house, getting into all sorts of mischief and making memories to last a lifetime. And while we may have gone our separate ways as we got older, our bond has never wavered. Andrew, you’ve always been there for me and I’m so grateful to have you as not just a cousin, but a true friend. Katie, thank you for making Andrew so incredibly happy and for fitting into our crazy family so perfectly. To the happy couple, may your love be as endless as those summer days at the lake. Customize your best man speech now >>

13. The Childhood Rival Turned Friend

If you had told me when we were kids that one day I’d be standing up as Alex’s best man, I would have laughed in your face. Alex and I spent most of our childhood as rivals, competing over everything from sports to academics to who could eat the most hot dogs at the county fair. But somewhere along the way, that rivalry turned into friendship. Alex, you’ve challenged me and pushed me to be my best self, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Samantha, you are Alex’s perfect match and I’ve never seen him happier. To Alex and Samantha, may your love be as fierce as our childhood competitions and as enduring as our friendship. Customize your best man speech now >>

14. The Former Roommate

Living with Eric was an adventure, to say the least. From late-night philosophical discussions to epic video game battles to that one time we thought it would be a good idea to adopt a pet snake, there was never a dull moment. But through it all, Eric was always the best kind of friend and roommate – supportive, understanding, and always down for a good time. Eric, I’ve watched you grow and mature so much over the years and I couldn’t be prouder of the man you’ve become. Laura, thank you for bringing such joy and love into Eric’s life. To the happy couple, may your home be filled with as much laughter and love as our old apartment was. Customize your best man speech now >>

best man speech example

15. The Study Abroad Buddy

When Brandon and I decided to study abroad together, we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into. From navigating foreign public transportation to trying to order coffee in broken Spanish, every day was a new adventure. But through it all, Brandon was the best travel companion and friend I could have asked for. Brandon, your curiosity, kindness, and zest for life inspire me every day and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Sophie, you share those same amazing qualities and I know you and Brandon will have a lifetime of adventures together. To Brandon and Sophie, may your love be as limitless as your wanderlust. Customize your best man speech now >>

16. The Fraternity Pledge Brother

Pledging a fraternity is an experience like no other, and going through it with Nate created a bond that will last a lifetime. From late-night study sessions to epic prank wars to learning the true meaning of brotherhood, Nate was always right there with me. Nate, your loyalty, integrity, and humor are unmatched and I’m so grateful to call you my brother. Emily, you’ve been such an amazing addition to our fraternity family and I’ve never seen Nate happier. To Nate and Emily, may your love be as strong as our fraternal bond. Customize your best man speech now >>

17. The Bandmate

Making music with Sam has been one of the greatest joys of my life. From late-night jam sessions in his garage to playing our first gig to recording our debut album, Sam’s talent and passion have always inspired me. But as much as I love making music with Sam, what I love even more is seeing the incredible man and partner he’s become. Ashley, your love and support have been the perfect harmony to Sam’s melody. To Sam and Ashley, may your love be as beautiful and enduring as the music you make together. Customize your best man speech now >>

18. The Wingman

Every guy needs a wingman, and Tyler was the best wingman a guy could ask for. From talking me up to my crush to helping me pick out the perfect outfit for a first date, Tyler was always there with the assist. But little did I know, Tyler’s true soulmate was right there by his side all along. Megan, you and Tyler have been an unstoppable duo since day one and I’ve never seen two people more perfect for each other. To Tyler and Megan, may your love story be even better than the ones we used to make up at the bar. Customize your best man speech now >>

19. The Gym Buddy

There’s nothing like a shared love of fitness to bring two people together, and that’s definitely the case for me and Kyle. From early morning workouts to post-gym protein shakes, Kyle has been my constant motivator and friend. Kyle, your dedication and discipline in the gym are only matched by your dedication and love for Sara. Sara, you bring out the best in Kyle and I’ve never seen him happier. To Kyle and Sara, may your love be as strong as your deadlift game. Customize your best man speech now >>

20. The Travel Buddy

When Jared and I decided to backpack through Europe after college, we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into. From missed trains to language barriers to that one time we got lost in the Swiss Alps, it was an adventure to say the least. But through it all, Jared was the best travel companion and friend I could have asked for. Jared, your curiosity, adaptability, and zest for life inspire me every day. Stephanie, you share those same incredible qualities and I know you and Jared will have a lifetime of adventures together. To Jared and Stephanie, may your love be your greatest adventure yet. Customize your best man speech now >>

21. The Childhood Best Friend

Michael and I have been attached at the hip since we were five years old. From building forts in the backyard to navigating the ups and downs of adolescence, Michael has been my constant through it all. And while a lot has changed since those fort-building days, one thing never will – the incredible bond and friendship we share. Michael, you’re more than just my best friend, you’re my brother. Anna, you’ve been such a beautiful addition to Michael’s life and our friendship. To Michael and Anna, may your love be as enduring and unbreakable as the bond we share. Customize your best man speech now >>

22. The High School Teammate

Playing football with Ethan in high school taught me a lot about hard work, dedication, and the power of teamwork. But what it taught me most of all was the value of a truly great friend. Ethan, your work ethic and loyalty on the field were only matched by your kindness and compassion off of it. Olivia, you bring out the very best in Ethan and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Ethan and Olivia, may your love be a touchdown in the game of life. Customize your best man speech now >>

23. The College Study Partner

When it came to surviving organic chemistry, I couldn’t have asked for a better study partner than Dan. From late night cram sessions to celebrating our hard-earned grades, Dan’s intelligence, determination, and humor got me through some of the toughest academic challenges of my life. But more than just a great study partner, Dan has been an incredible friend. Dan, your brilliance is only outshone by your huge heart. Sarah, you’re Dan’s perfect match and I’ve never seen him happier. To Dan and Sarah, may your love be as strong as your combined brain power. Customize your best man speech now >>

24. The Work Confidant

In the high-stress world of corporate finance, having a colleague like John to lean on has been a game-changer. From celebrating big wins to commiserating over tough projects, John has been my go-to confidant and friend at the office. But as much as I appreciate John’s professional support, what I appreciate even more is his friendship outside of work. John, your integrity, compassion, and wicked sense of humor make you an incredible friend and partner. Lisa, you bring so much love and light into John’s life. To John and Lisa, may your love bring you the same joy and support you’ve brought to so many others. Customize your best man speech now >>

25. The Roommate Turned Best Friend

When David and I signed the lease on our college apartment, we had no idea we were also signing up for a lifelong friendship. From late-night heart-to-hearts to epic Super Smash Bros battles, living with David was an unforgettable experience filled with laughter, growth, and more than a few dirty dishes. David, your creativity, kindness, and unwavering loyalty inspire me every day. Karen, you perfectly complement David’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier. To David and Karen, may your love and friendship be the stuff sitcom dreams are made of. Customize your best man speech now >>

26. The Cousin Turned Best Man

Growing up, Ben and I were more like brothers than cousins. From family vacations to holiday gatherings to just hanging out on a lazy Saturday, Ben has been a constant presence in my life and one of my greatest friends. Ben, your compassion, humor, and dependability make you an incredible cousin and an even better man. Emily, you’ve been such a wonderful addition to our family and I’ve never seen Ben happier than he is with you. To Ben and Emily, may your love be as strong and enduring as our family bond. Customize your best man speech now >>

27. The Childhood Neighbor

Living next door to Alex as a kid was like having a built-in best friend. From backyard baseball games to sneaking out for late-night adventures, Alex and I were inseparable. And while we may have grown up and gone our separate ways, the bond we share has never wavered. Alex, your loyalty, humor, and zest for life have always inspired me. Samantha, you perfectly complement Alex’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier. To Alex and Samantha, may your love be as enduring as the memories we shared growing up. Customize your best man speech now >>

28. The Camp Counselor Turned Friend

When I first met Chris as a camper, I looked up to him as the coolest counselor around. Little did I know that our friendship would extend far beyond the camp years. Chris, your leadership, compassion, and sense of adventure inspired me as a camper and continue to inspire me to this day. Laura, you bring out the very best in Chris and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Chris and Laura, may your love be as fun and exciting as a summer at camp. Customize your best man speech now >>

29. The Fraternity Brother

Joining a fraternity gave me more than just a few Greek letters to wear – it gave me a brother in Ryan. From pledging together to living in the house to all the unforgettable moments in between, Ryan has been by my side through it all. Ryan, your loyalty, integrity, and humor embody the true meaning of brotherhood. Jessica, you’ve been such an incredible addition to our fraternity family and I’ve never seen Ryan happier. To Ryan and Jessica, may your love be as strong as our bond of brotherhood. Customize your best man speech now >>

30. The Bandmate

Making music with James has been one of the greatest joys of my life. From late-night jam sessions to playing our first gig to recording our album, James’ talent and dedication have always inspired me. But as much as I love playing music with James, what I love even more is seeing the incredible man and partner he’s become. Sarah, your love and support have been the perfect harmony to James’ melody. To James and Sarah, may your love be as beautiful and enduring as the music you make together. Customize your best man speech now >>

31. The Business Partner

Starting a business with your best friend is not for the faint of heart, but I couldn’t have asked for a better partner than Mike. From late nights working on pitches to celebrating our first big win, Mike’s creativity, drive, and unwavering support have been the backbone of our success. But as proud as I am of our professional accomplishments, I’m even prouder of the man and partner Mike has become. Emily, you bring out the very best in Mike and I’ve never seen him happier. To Mike and Emily, may your love and partnership be as successful as our business endeavors. Customize your best man speech now >>

32. The Travel Companion

Backpacking through Europe with Matt was the adventure of a lifetime. From navigating foreign cities to trying new foods to making unforgettable memories, Matt was the perfect travel companion. Matt, your curiosity, adaptability, and endless positivity made our trip an experience I’ll never forget. Anna, you share Matt’s adventurous spirit and zest for life, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Matt and Anna, may your love be the greatest adventure of all. Customize your best man speech now >>

33. The Childhood Rival Turned Friend

Growing up, Josh and I were fierce competitors in everything from academics to sports to video games. But somewhere along the way, that rivalry turned into an unbreakable friendship. Josh, your drive, integrity, and loyalty inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful to have you as a friend. Rachel, you perfectly complement Josh’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Josh and Rachel, may your love be as strong as our friendship and as exciting as our childhood rivalries. Customize your best man speech now >>

34. The College Roommate

Living with Andrew in college was an unforgettable experience filled with late-night study sessions, impromptu dance parties, and more than a few debates about whose turn it was to do the dishes. But through it all, Andrew was more than just a roommate – he was a true friend. Andrew, your intelligence, compassion, and humor made those college years some of the best of my life. Karen, you bring out the very best in Andrew and I’ve never seen him happier. To Andrew and Karen, may your love be as strong as our friendship and as full of laughter as our college days. Customize your best man speech now >>

35. The Work Mentor Turned Friend

When I first started my job, I was intimidated by Ryan’s success and expertise. But it didn’t take long for that intimidation to turn into admiration and friendship. Ryan, your guidance, support, and incredible work ethic have been instrumental in my professional growth, and I’m so grateful for your mentorship and friendship. Lisa, you bring so much joy and love into Ryan’s life, and I’ve never seen him happier. To Ryan and Lisa, may your love be as inspiring as Ryan’s leadership and as enduring as our friendship. Customize your best man speech now >>

36. The High School Best Friend

Jason and I have been best friends since the first day of high school, when we bonded over our mutual love of terrible puns and hatred of gym class. Since then, Jason has been by my side through all of life’s ups and downs, always ready with a joke, a hug, or a listening ear. Jason, your humor, loyalty, and huge heart make you an incredible friend and an even better partner. Stephanie, you perfectly complement Jason’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Jason and Stephanie, may your love be as enduring as our friendship and as full of laughter as our high school days. Customize your best man speech now >>

37. The Grad School Study Buddy

Surviving grad school would have been impossible without Eric by my side. From late nights in the library to commiserating over endless papers, Eric’s intelligence, determination, and humor got me through some of the toughest academic challenges of my life. But more than just a study partner, Eric has been an incredible friend. Eric, your brilliance is only matched by your kindness and compassion. Laura, you bring out the very best in Eric and I’ve never seen him happier. To Eric and Laura, may your love be as strong as your combined intellect and as enduring as our friendship. Customize your best man speech now >>

38. The Childhood Next-Door Neighbor

Growing up next door to Mark was like having a built-in best friend. From backyard adventures to late-night video game marathons, Mark and I did it all together. And while we may have grown up and gone our separate ways, the bond we share has never wavered. Mark, your creativity, loyalty, and zest for life have always inspired me. Emily, you perfectly complement Mark’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Mark and Emily, may your love be as fun and enduring as the memories we shared growing up. Customize your best man speech now >>

39. The Sports League Teammate

Playing on the same softball team as Chris for the past five years has been an absolute blast. From celebrating big wins to laughing off tough losses, Chris’ positivity, sportsmanship, and killer curveball have made him an incredible teammate and friend. But as much as I love sharing the field with Chris, what I admire most is the man he is off the field. Chris, your kindness, integrity, and unwavering support for your loved ones are truly inspiring. Amanda, you bring out the very best in Chris and I’ve never seen him happier. To Chris and Amanda, may your love be a grand slam. Customize your best man speech now >>

40. The Fraternity Little Brother

When I first met Dan as my fraternity little brother, I had no idea that I was also gaining a lifelong friend. From late-night heart-to-hearts to ridiculous prank wars, Dan’s humor, compassion, and loyalty have made him an incredible brother and an even better man. Dan, your dedication to your friendships, your passions, and your values is truly inspiring. Sarah, you’ve been such a wonderful addition to our fraternity family and I’ve never seen Dan happier than he is with you. To Dan and Sarah, may your love be as strong as our bond of brotherhood. Customize your best man speech now >>

41. The Coworker Turned Best Friend

When Tom and I first started working together, I had no idea that I was gaining more than just a colleague – I was gaining a true friend. From collaborating on projects to sharing inside jokes to supporting each other through the ups and downs of work and life, Tom’s creativity, humor, and empathy have made him an incredible friend and confidant. Tom, your talent and dedication are only matched by your huge heart. Rachel, you bring out the very best in Tom and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Tom and Rachel, may your love be as strong as our friendship and as full of laughter as our days at the office. Customize your best man speech now >>

42. The Travel Buddy

Exploring the world with James has been the adventure of a lifetime. From getting lost in foreign cities to trying exotic new foods to making unforgettable memories, James’ curiosity, adaptability, and endless sense of wonder have made him the perfect travel companion. But as much as I love sharing adventures with James, what I admire most is his adventurous approach to love and life. James, your courage, compassion, and zest for life inspire me every day. Sarah, you share James’ adventurous spirit and kind heart, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To James and Sarah, may your love be the greatest adventure of all. Customize your best man speech now >>

43. The Cousin Turned Best Friend

Growing up, Nate and I were more like brothers than cousins. From family vacations to holiday gatherings to just hanging out on lazy summer days, Nate has been a constant presence in my life and one of my greatest friends. Nate, your humor, loyalty, and unwavering support have gotten me through some of life’s toughest moments, and I’m so grateful to have you as a cousin and a friend. Emily, you’ve been such a wonderful addition to our family and I’ve never seen Nate happier than he is with you. To Nate and Emily, may your love be as strong and enduring as our family bond. Customize your best man speech now >>

44. The High School Lab Partner

Being assigned as lab partners with Alex in chemistry class was the start of a beautiful friendship. From late nights studying for exams to inside jokes about our eccentric teacher to bonding over our shared love of science, Alex’s intelligence, humor, and kind heart made those high school years some of the best of my life. Alex, your brilliance and compassion continue to inspire me every day. Jenna, you perfectly complement Alex’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Alex and Jenna, may your love be as strong as your combined brainpower and as enduring as our friendship. Customize your best man speech now >>

45. The College Intramural Teammate

Playing intramural soccer with Ryan in college was an absolute blast. From early morning practices to hard-fought games to post-win celebrations, Ryan’s athleticism, sportsmanship, and endless enthusiasm made him an incredible teammate and friend. But as much as I loved sharing the field with Ryan, what I admire most is the man he is off the field. Ryan, your dedication, loyalty, and huge heart inspire me every day. Lisa, you bring out the very best in Ryan and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Ryan and Lisa, may your love be a goal for the ages. Customize your best man speech now >>

46. The Carpool Buddy

Sharing a commute with Kevin for the past few years has been a highlights of my work days. From early morning coffee runs to belting out car karaoke to deep conversations about life and love, Kevin’s humor, empathy, and endless positivity have made him an incredible friend and confidant. Kevin, your kindness and zest for life are truly inspiring, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Sarah, you bring out the very best in Kevin and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Kevin and Sarah, may your love be as joyful and enduring as our morning carpool sessions. Customize your best man speech now >>

47. The Language Exchange Partner

When I signed up for a language exchange program, I had no idea I would be gaining a lifelong friend in Javier. From practicing our language skills over coffee to bonding over our shared love of travel and culture, Javier’s intelligence, curiosity, and kind heart have made him an incredible friend and cultural guide. Javier, your passion for life and learning inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Isabella, you share Javier’s adventurous spirit and warm heart, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Javier and Isabella, may your love be as beautiful and enduring as the languages and cultures that brought us together. Customize your best man speech now >>

48. The Book Club Buddy

Joining a book club was one of the best decisions I ever made, not only because it introduced me to some incredible reads, but also because it brought Mike into my life. From spirited discussions about our favorite characters to bonding over our shared love of storytelling, Mike’s intelligence, wit, and endless curiosity have made him an incredible friend and literary companion. Mike, your creativity and compassion inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Emily, you bring out the very best in Mike and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Mike and Emily, may your love be as beautiful and enduring as the stories we’ve shared. Customize your best man speech now >>

49. The Gym Buddy

When I first started going to the gym, I was intimidated and unsure of myself. But then I met Alex, and everything changed. From spotting each other on heavy lifts to pushing each other to reach our fitness goals, Alex’s dedication, encouragement, and endless positivity have made him an incredible friend and workout partner. Alex, your strength and determination inspire me both in and out of the gym, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Jennifer, you bring out the very best in Alex and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Alex and Jennifer, may your love be as strong and enduring as the bond we’ve built through sweat and iron. Customize your best man speech now >>

50. The Music Festival Buddy

Attending my first music festival with Chris was an unforgettable experience. From discovering new bands to dancing until dawn to bonding over our shared love of live music, Chris’ passion, energy, and adventurous spirit made him the perfect festival companion. But as much as I love sharing musical adventures with Chris, what I admire most is his approach to life and love. Chris, your creativity, authenticity, and huge heart inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Laura, you share Chris’ artistic spirit and kind soul, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Chris and Laura, may your love be as wild and beautiful as the music that brought us together. Customize your best man speech now >>

51. The Volunteer Buddy

When I started volunteering at the local animal shelter, I had no idea I would be gaining a lifelong friend in James. From caring for the animals to bonding over our shared passion for making a difference, James’ compassion, dedication, and incredible heart have made him an amazing friend and role model. James, your selflessness and love for all living creatures inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Sarah, you share James’ kind soul and generous spirit, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To James and Sarah, may your love be as beautiful and enduring as the difference you make in the world. Customize your best man speech now >>

52. The Trivia Night Teammate

Trivia night at our local bar wouldn’t be the same without Ryan by my side. From obscure history facts to niche pop culture references, Ryan’s endless knowledge, quick wit, and competitive spirit have made him an incredible teammate and friend. But as much as I love dominating trivia with Ryan, what I admire most is his intelligence and humor in all aspects of life. Ryan, your brilliance and humor inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Lisa, you perfectly complement Ryan’s wonderful qualities and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Ryan and Lisa, may your love be as strong as our trivia skills and as full of laughter as our nights at the pub. Customize your best man speech now >>

53. The Running Club Buddy

When I joined a local running club to train for my first marathon, I had no idea I would be gaining a lifelong friend in Mike. From early morning training runs to pushing each other to reach our goals, Mike’s determination, encouragement, and endless positivity have made him an incredible friend and running partner. Mike, your strength and resilience inspire me both on and off the trail, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Emily, you bring out the very best in Mike and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Mike and Emily, may your love be as strong and enduring as the miles we’ve logged together. Customize your best man speech now >>

54. The Cooking Class Buddy

Signing up for a cooking class was one of the best decisions I ever made, not only because it improved my culinary skills, but also because it brought Alex into my life. From mastering new techniques to bonding over our shared love of food and culture, Alex’s passion, creativity, and warm heart have made him an incredible friend and cooking companion. Alex, your talent and zest for life inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Jenna, you share Alex’s adventurous palate and kind soul, and I’ve never seen him happier than he is with you. To Alex and Jenna, may your love be as delicious and enduring as the meals we’ve shared. Customize your best man speech now >>

55. The Karaoke Buddy

Karaoke night wouldn’t be the same without Chris by my side. From belting out classic rock anthems to laughing through forgotten lyrics, Chris’ energy, humor, and fearless spirit have made him an incredible friend and duet partner. But as much as I love sharing the stage with Chris, what I admire most is his approach to life and love. Chris, your authenticity and huge heart inspire me every day, and I’m so grateful for our friendship. Customize your best man speech now >>

Related Blogs About Best Man Speeches

Now that you’ve gotten a comprehensive crash course in speech styles and structures by looking through those best man speech examples, check out these related blogs for even more tips and inspiration:

  • How to Write a Funny Best Man Speech
  • Try Our Best Man Speech Generator 
  • The Ultimate Guide to Being a Best Man in 2o24
  • Crafting an Unforgettable Best Man Speech for Your Brother: A Comprehensive Guide

How Bridesmaid for Hire Can Help Write Your Best Man Speech

At Bridesmaid for Hire , we’re all about helping you navigate the wonderful (and occasionally stressful) world of weddings. From being a professional bridesmaid to delivering a killer maid of honor speech, we’ve got your back every step of the way.

Remember, being asked to give a wedding speech is an incredible honor – and you’ve totally got this. Stay true to yourself, speak from the heart, and let the love and laughter flow. We are here to help. Try Our Best Man Speech Generator 

Best Man Speech Examples Recap

Let’s do a quick review of the key best man speech takeaways:

  • Choose an authentic speech style and structure that fits your personality and relationship to the groom.
  • Keep the speech concise (aim for 3-5 minutes), unless you’re really nailing those sentimental or comedic elements.
  • Consider your audience and the overall wedding vibe to ensure your speech is appropriate and well-received.
  • Balance humor and sincerity, always bringing it back to your love and support for the groom and his bride.
  • Practice, practice, practice for confident and engaging delivery on the big day.

Final Thoughts on our Best Man Speech Examples

Phew, that was a lot of best man speech content! I hope you’re feeling more empowered than ever to knock your toast out of the park. Just remember, there’s no one “right” way to give an incredible best man speech. The magic ingredients are your authentic perspective, genuine sentiments, and a hefty dash of preparation (and maybe a shot of liquid courage – you’ve earned it).

Also, know that Bridesmaid for Hire  is here to help along the way:

Related posts:

The Ultimate Guide to Crafting a Memorable Best Man Speech in 2024

1-800-BRIDESMAID

The newlywed card game, something extra to love.

Read the weekly newsletter from Bridesmaid for Hire, 1-800-Bridesmaid , to hear about real stories, from strangers, who need advice on love, life, friendship, and so much more.

Looking for the perfect wedding gift for someone you adore? Grab The Newlywed Card Game. It's a fun and interactive game they can play on their honeymoon or future date nights.

Love Letters from a Professional Bridesmaid

Our adventure is one of the epic stories, honest tips, and heart-warming advice. We put it all inside a weekly newsletter delivered straight to your inbox. Join 50,000 others who eyeball what’s inside. 

good one liners for best man speech

Hey! I'm Jen Glantz

I started Bridesmaid for Hire 10-years-ago after being a bridesmaid for lots of friends. I’m a nonfiction author and content creator who lives in Brooklyn with Goofy (the dog), Gemma (the baby), and Adam (the husband). I love to share: advice & tips, secrets with strangers, and pizza. I eat a lot of pizza.

speech tool

Testimonials, maid of honor, bridesmaid for hire book, watch tiktok, read the true stories, become a pro bridesmaid, get on the email list, instant adventures.

Copyright 2023 Jen Glantz & Bridesmaid for Hire 

Terms of Services

Follow me on IG

Refund Policy

Privacy Policy

Welcome, friend!

Choose your

Read the Book

Build your package

FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY - Book with just £1 deposit!

Flexible payments!

Price match promise

Best man's speech

Best man's speech

Everything you need to know, the ultimate best man's speech guide.

You’ve arranged an amazing stag do for the groom, and he’s now ready to be sent off into marital bliss. But as the best man the stag do is just one of your duties (admittedly it’s the most fun one of them). On the big day you’ll have to pull out the big guns and deliver the ultimate best man’s speech.

Now you could put it off until the morning of the wedding and wing it, but like a great stag do, a great speech needs some planning. So starting writing your speech with a few weeks to spare, you’ll do yourself – and the groom – justice and go down as a legend of a best man!

With that in mind, we’ve put together the ultimate guide

Quick Links

Best man speech structure

Best man speech jokes

Best man speech one liners

Best man speech examples

Best Man Speech Structure

Start with a bang and end with a big payoff. Connect emotionally with the audience and take them on a journey. Make them laugh, make them cry. Remind everyone how special the day is and make your best mate look good (not too good!). Be pithy and don’t ramble. Keep it all under ten or fifteen minutes and the guests will thank you.

It's a lot to keep in mind, but don’t be nervous, with a solid structure you'll get to hit on all the essential notes. Below is The Stag Company formula for speech success:

Opening Line

An opening line is all about setting the tone. Fail to nail this and you've lost your audience before you've ever started. Generally, a top joke puts everyone in the right mood. There's a few ways to approach this; traditionally you'll be speaking after the groom, so a joke insult about his speech or at his expense is always a winner. However, if you're speaking after the bride's father we'd say steer clear of that and instead - go down the self-deprecating route. A line about how nervous or unprepared you are is a great way to get in an early laugh and get the audience on your side.

Introduction

It might seem a little obvious to introduce yourself. Obviously the bride and groom know who you are. But at a big wedding there's a decent chance that many of the relatives and more distant friends might not. So breaking down how you all know one another is a great way to add some substance and context. This is also a fantastic opportunity to pay some compliments to the bride and the bridesmaids. Anything about how beautiful they look is a sure fire way to set the bride and her family at ease.

This is always one of the key bits. You're really here on behalf of the groom, so a whole section dedicated to him is essential. You'll be talking about your relationship with the groom, but remember to keep in mind that this is about HIM not you, so the focus should always be on him. This is a great chance to build up the comedy and regale the audience with funny anecdotes, maybe about how you met. Keep in mind your audience - the time the groom pulled a 'girl' in Thailand is probably not kosher subject matter for a wedding. And remember that this isn't just jokes at the groom's expense, you're here to make him look good not roast him, so throw in a few lines about what a great guy he is.

Thou Shalt Slow Down; and Stay Sober

A great best man's speech should flow. It's all in the delivery. You want to skip from Point A to B to C in a brisk but not rushed manner. Feel free to take a pause when you feel like it, the audience is listening to them so command their attention. Don't rush through your speech at a million miles an hour. If you do you'll mumble and gabble and your jokes will fall flat.

And just as important? Don't be responsible for the dreaded drunk speech. People will call it ‘memorable' for all the wrong reasons. Hitting up the bubbly early can seem like a great idea to control your nerves but it's a mistake. Remember that you've got all the time in the world after your speech is over to take advantage of the free bar!

The Wedding Day

Once you've exhausted all your clean material about you and the groom you'll want to move onto the day itself. Highlight the effort that's gone into the day and make sure you pay particular attention to the contribution of the bride's parents - after all there's a decent chance they paid for it! If you're talking about the particulars of the day an off-the-cuff observation about the ceremony so far, or the menu or something along those lines makes your speech seem less scripted and more improvisational.

You should be hitting the middle of your speech around this point, and it's where you should probably start to move the tone away from comedy and to something a little more ‘feeling-y'. Unlike the groom, if you're making any jokes at the bride's expense it's not going to go well, and you might upset here on her big day. That's not to say you can't keep the comedy going, feel free to regale everyone with how you the first time you met the bride you thought she was too good for the groom and by the second time you were certain. That sort of thing. This should all be about how amazing she is and how she's made the groom happier than ever. That sort of soppy stuff.

We're in full soppy territory here. Talk about how good the bride and groom are together. Drop in a few anecdotes here, talk about how they've affected everyone's life and how happy everyone is to see them together. If you have stories that are likely to turn on the waterworks, then this is the time! Things not to mention in this section range from past girlfriends (or wives), arguments, and chances are anything that happened on your Eastern Europe stag.

Thou Shalt Avoid The Clichés

Try to be original. Clichés are overused and tired, avoid them like the plague (get it?) . If your opening line is anything like "The last time I stood up in front of a room of people I was found guilty" or "My name is ____ and I'm an alcoholic -wait, wrong speech." Is an absolute no-no. The same goes for tasteless jokes about the wedding night. And if we hear "It's been an emotional day – even the cake is in tiers.", one more time we're going to find whoever first wrote that and make sure they end up in tears.

Philosophise

Here you might want to talk about love in general. Mention the other couples (such as the parents of the bride or groom) as an example of who the new couple can look up to. You've got to toe the line here, things can easily get a little sickly sweet, so finishing with a strong joke can be essential here. After all it's your job to make everyone laugh, and the subject area of love and successful marriages is hardly a comedy goldmine!

Well done! We're in the home straight now! You've done it! The ending is where you summarise everything that you've covered in the speech. And this means that it's a great chance to call-back to some earlier jokes for a few more laughs. Leave your best jokes 'til now to ensure that everything ends on a happy note. Offer some advice to the couple, wish them all the best and ask the audience, along with you to raise a glass for the...

The best toasts are short and sweet, but that doesn't mean that you should put less effort into them. A good toast should take as long as the rest of your speech to come up with. It should reflect the tone of your speech. If you've been heavy on the comedy, a suddenly philosophical line about love can seem out of place. And equally if you've been all about the wonders of love, cracking out a one liner seems jarring and odd. After a fantastic closer it's time to take the praise for a fantastic speech.

Thou Shalt Not Read Off a Script

There’s no more sure fire way to lose the audience’s attention than to be pausing every few minutes to ruffle through hastily written sheets of A4. Reading off a script takes away all the natural feel of a speech, you’ll look like a kid reading a report with the paper a few inches away from their face. If you’re worried about forgetting a line here or there, then we suggest using cue cards. Instead of having the entire speech on them they just have the key points for you to hit. Instead of starting at a sheet of paper you’ll be engaging with the audience.

Book your stag do today!

Best Man Speech Jokes

At times during your best man speech you might want to turn up the emotional side of things, but whatever anyone says the main duty of the best man is to get everyone laughing during the speech. But we've all been to plenty of weddings where the jokes are cheesy, poorly delivered and with a worse sense of timing than a broken stopwatch, the kind of speeches where you're much more likely to cringe than even get a few pity titters.

To make sure that your comedy routine doesn't die a laughless death there's a few things to keep in mind, there's the tone, your delivery and ensuring that you've learned them off by heart so you're never floundering for a punchline.

Bride and groom laughin

Tone of Jokes

Put simply, remember where you are . If there's any chance that one of your jokes might go down a controversial route, or offend anyone then take it out. You're not Jimmy Carr, you're not Frankie Boyle, you're here to make everyone laugh, not give nana a heart attack.

It's all about the audience. This means steering clear of inside jokes that only you and the groom will get, he might have a chuckle but everyone else will be puzzled at mention of the 'Noodle incident'.

Don't bore people , when you're telling a hilarious story, it stops being hilarious when you over-explain every part of it. How relevant is it to the audience to know that this particular incident happened when you were 18 in 2004 at 4:07am on Tuesday the 7th just off Second Street and the weather was a little bit rainy, not very rainy but a little bit...

Wedding Microphone

Delivery of Jokes

If there's one thing show business got right it's 'fake it til you make it', good comedy has to be delivered confidently, so even if you're packed with nerves and shaking like the proverbial leaf just pretend that you're confident and you'll find the punchlines come off smother than a really smooth thing.

Furthermore, confidence isn't just about your voice. It's about your posture. Some best men end up looking so rigid they seem like they've had something shoved where it shouldn't. Focus on relaxing your limbs and your body, it won't just put you at ease, it'll make everyone watching you more relaxed too.

Be yourself . Don't make expectations for yourself too high. People are expecting to have a little chortle, they aren't expecting a comedy barrage. So if a joke or two fall flat, don't worry about it and move on. Half the people here are your nearest and dearest, so they won't care and chances are the other half will be too drunk to remember anyway!

Wedding celebration cheers

Embrace The Applause

It is a natural reaction for many to sip their drink and quickly sit down the moment you finish the speech, but this is the exact opposite of what you should be doing. You've worked hard to write the talk up, learn it all off by heard (even if you did use some notes) and delivered it with aplomb. Soak up all the attention you get and make the most of it. After a few seconds of drinking and smiling, you then need to pass the microphone on to whoever will be speaking after you. This is often the groom, so just check beforehand who you should be passing it to and work out a quick opener to get them a rapturous applause.

Best Man One Liners

Here's a list of best man speech one liners that can be put in your best man speech.

"I heard there is a sweepstake going on the length of the speech. I bid on 1 hour, so good luck!"

"I'm a little bit nervous, but fortunately I received a few wise words in the build-up. I was told that talking to an audience is much like being at a nudist beach, it's only hard for the first few minutes."

"I'm going to ask you to keep laughter and applause to a minimum. I would appreciate it as I've got a bit of a hangover. I know it's inappropriate to drink before such a big day, but I couldn't leave the groom drinking alone."

"I heard somewhere that the speech shouldn't take longer than it takes the groom to make love. Well, that's all from me."

"For those of you who don't know me, my name is Tom. I have been Marcus's friend for 1 week now, he found my advert on Gumtree as he hasn't got many friends so had to hire someone for the day."

"John had a hard time choosing his best man. First he asked his funniest friend, and they said no. Second he asked his smartest friend, and they said no. Third, he asked his most handsome friend, and they said no. Finally, he called me up and I said "John, I can't say no to you four times.""

"I met the groom's parents earlier this year. And they told me to take some inappropriate stories out. So thank you very much, that's it from me."

"So where do I start with Dan? He's handsome. He's intelligent. He's witty. He's cha-... charm... what does that say there Dan? I can't make out your handwriting"

"There's some really important people here tonight. Some of whom you'll meet throughout the evening, and without whom none of this would be possible - so I hope you'll join me in toasting the barman."

"A husband is a lot like a hardwood floor. Lay it right the first time and you can walk all over it for the rest of your life."

"The Oxford English Dictionary describes a wedding as 'a fusing of two metals using a torch'"

"I wish them well on their honeymoon in Wales. What’s that? The honeymoon isn’t in Wales? I could’ve sworn the groom said he was going to Bangor for two weeks?"

"Nick, you really are lucky to have found such a beautiful and caring woman to become your wife. Nicola… at least it didn’t rain today."

"I did ask for a microphone. But unfortunately one could be provided. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence from the front should reassure you that you aren’t missing out."

"It’s funny how history repeats itself. It was 30 years ago that Sam and Samantha sent their daughter to bed with a dummy… and it’s happening all over again today."

"Unlike most best man’s speeches which can be full of innuendo, I’ve assured the bride and groom that if there’s anything they don’t like the look of I’ll whip it out immediately."

"How to describe Chris? I’ve spent a long time wondering how best to hit on the right tone of praise, warmth and sincerity that sums up his character. I could speak about him for an hour (don’t worry, I’m not going to) and I’d still be no closer to grasping the essential essence of this man. But funnily enough he can be neatly summed up with an internationally recognised hand gesture."

"The vicar wanted to make it clear to the couple that he is firm on his stance on sex before marriage. However, Jenny has assured him it would only take a few minutes."

Best Man Speech Examples

Jamie Milligan is an ex-footballer who played for Everton and Blackpool. He hit the headlines last year after his best man Dan McKenzie made national news with his best man speech antics. In a genius trick the best man pretended to have forgotten his speech and ran out of the room. The screen in the room quickly cut to a video of him running out of the venue. It then shows McKenzie going to great lengths such as running down streets, over farm fields, stopping for an Ice Cream on Lytham seafront and also a pint. The comical journey includes nods to the groom’s football career and slapstick comedy as he falls over every obstacle rushing to get back to the wedding, where he runs back through at the end of the video. Genius.

Watch Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuTrA55ZUfQ

Darren Byrne is a best man from Ireland who stole the show at his best friend’s wedding with his great idea for personalisation. He spent 11 months collecting videos of messages from celebs for Darren Farrell and Anna Carey and played them at their wedding in Portugal. Byrne reached out to stars and agents to collate it all. He managed to get big names like James Corden, Gary Neville and Gary Barlow to give their best wishes to the couple. Of those that were unable to make time for a video they did receive an autographed photo to take home as a cool wedding present.

Watch Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a2e3SujId-w

Dan Buccheri is a talented musician from Melbourne, Australia so when his brother Adrian asked him to be his best man you just know that is going to be great. Of course, Dan chose to do his speech in song form. He chose a medley of recognisable songs with edited lyrics. Included was songs from the Lion King, Backstreet Boys and R.Kelly, all with amusing lyrics. Eg “But now she has found the ignition, she got you sweeping the kitchen”. The song become very sincere and personal towards the end as he uses a take on Sam Smith’s hit Stay With Me to hit the hearts of everyone around.

Watch here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3XL9BB0ttsM

Book your stag do today

Best Man Speech Opening Lines

Genuinely one of the hardest aspects is simply starting off the speech. Like the classic scene of an author trying to break their writer's block with the opening line of their new book, once you get on a roll it all starts to fall into place, but how do you kick it all off?

Well a great opening line can help to set up the whole speech. I (Tom) wrote in a line that included an asset, I lifted a piece of toast in the air and said 'I'd like to make a toast'. The reaction was a lot of laughs. The negatives, not everyone was fully paying attention, so a silly joke lost on half the room. The lesson from this is make sure everyone is paying attention before starting off, you don't want to waste great lines on people chatting away.

Below are some great ways to kick off your best man speech:

  • Everyone here will know the bride is an incredible person who deserves an amazing guy to settle down with. Fortunately (grooms name) got there first before she found one.
  • Those of you who know me will know that I'm not big on making speeches (then sit down for a few seconds). 
  • I'll keep this short (then sit down for a few seconds).
  • I have been hearing rumours that there has been a running bet on how long the best man speech will last for. I've gone for 40 minutes, so strap yourselves in!
  • I'll try to keep my speech short, because I can't wait to see (groom's name) on the dancefloor!
  • Before I begin, I've been asked by (bride's name) to remove anything risque or any innuendos, so don't worry, if I come across one I'll whip it out.
  • I was asked not to share embarrassing stories about the groom (then put a thick pile of papers down), well that's most of my speech gone.
  • The couple actually had some troubles finding someone to do the speech today. They started by asking the funniest friend and he said no. They then asked the best looking friend and again it was no. Then they asked their most charming friend I said yes, I couldn't say no after being asked three times.
  • Ladies and gentleman, we are witnessing history, this is the first and last time anyone will trust me to make a public speech. God help us all.

Powered by Froala Editor

Well now you've got the speech down, but unfortunately it doesn't end there! There's the rest of your Best Man duties to worry about now, so you best read up on what to expect. And if you've been too busy preparing the perfect speech to prepare the perfect stag do then -first, what is wrong with you? - and you better take a look at our last minute page to save yourself, groom and the stag do from being stuck down the local boozer on the worst stag ever!

Why you should book with The Stag Company

The only stag company that provide you with a dedicated Event Planner from quote, right through to departure!

One of the biggest reasons that gents like yourselves come to The Stag Company is that they want a bit of help throwing their stag the best and most memorable weekend that’s possible. Yes, you could organise it yourself, but when you’re looking at hotels and activities for over 12 guys it can be tricky finding availability and knowing which places will and won’t take a stag group. That’s where we come in. With over a decade of experience, and having organised thousands of stag do’s, you can count on our knowledge and expertise to give you exactly what you and your group want.

Five stars!

Highly recommend if you have a busy life

- Nick James Harris, TrustPilot

Mon 2 Sept 2024

2024 newspaper of the year

@ Contact us

Your newsletters

51 Best Man jokes for a speech to win over any wedding crowd

Look no further if you're looking for any inspiration for your big speech.

Man making a speech for his sister at an LGBTQI+ wedding in the North East of England. He is wearing a suit, holding a microphone.

One of the most entertaining moments in any wedding day is the Best Man’s speech, a chance for a close friend or relative to roast the Groom one last time before he heads off red-faced into married life.

And let’s be honest, which Best Man has the time to write a wholly original, personally relevant, laugh-a-line routine these days?

So if you’re looking for any inspiration for your big speech, you could do worse than these tried-and-tested quips:

“It’s been an emotional day. Even the cake is in tiers.” “To start this speech, I Googled ‘the perfect best man speech’, but you had to pay to read the examples and I didn’t think it was worth it, so I’m just going to wing it.” “We’ve now reached the point in the proceedings when we all get to see the Groom shift uncomfortably in his seat and grip the tablecloth in nervous anticipation. That’s right. I’ve been asked to give him the drinks bill.” “I’m not used to public speaking. I only found out today that a toastmaster isn’t actually a kitchen appliance.” “I didn’t really know where to start so I thought I’d trawl the internet. After a couple of hours I’d found some really, really good stuff. But then I remembered that I was supposed to be writing a speech.”

best man jokes pullquote

“If there’s anyone here this afternoon who’s feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead, it’s probably because you’ve just married [Groom’s name].”

“I’ve been instructed to keep this speech smut-free, so if I come across any innuendo as I’m reading through, I’ll whip it out immediately.”

“All those among you who know the Bride will know that she is a wonderful and caring person. She deserves a good husband. Thank God he married her before she found one.”

“I’ve been asked by many how I’m going to cope with my best friend being married and spending all of his time loved up at home. I’m thrilled! I’ll finally be able to talk to women without him cramping my style.”

“Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, and a great man. But enough about me!”

“Just a couple of rules before we begin. If you have a mobile phone – leave it switched on, entertain yourselves. And if anyone texts you any good jokes, send them my way.”

“Just some last messages here to read out: one from the Groom’s football team to [Bride’s name] – ‘apologies we couldn’t all be here today, good luck with [Groom’s name], we found him to be useless in most positions, but wishing you all the best for tonight.”

best man jokes pullquote

“I’m here to give a speech about the Groom – but what can I say about him that hasn’t already been a topic on the Jeremy Kyle show?” “I do have to say to the Groom though, just how lucky you are. You will leave here today with a wife who is warm, loving and caring. And the Bride as well, how lucky you are as well. You leave here today having gained a lovely dress and a wonderful bouquet of flowers.” “[Groom’s name] asked me to be his best man a year ago – although I never actually received a formal invitation to the wedding. Let’s hope I haven’t eaten someone else’s meal by mistake – but more likely, he was saving himself the cost of a stamp.” “A best man is similar to a dead body at a funeral. You’re expected to be there, but if you say too much, people start freaking out.” “I didn’t really want to do this, but I thought it might be the only chance I’ll get to have a meal and some drinks paid for by the Groom.” “You’ve got no idea how much I’ve been looking forward to today. After all the time I’ve been friends with [Groom’s name], he has at long last admitted that I am the best man.” “For the speech today, the Bride and Groom have asked that I don’t talk about the Groom’s mishaps, mistakes, embarrassing moments or ex-girlfriends. So thanks for listening everyone, that’s all from me!”

best man jokes pullquote

Read more 9 best champagnes 8 best instant cameras 12 best men’s fragrances 

“As part of my research, I discovered that according to tradition I am supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and tell you all about his many good points. Well, I’m very sorry but I can’t sing and I won’t lie.”

“It’s time for me to do this speech I hurriedly scribbled down about an hour ago!”

“I do hope that the couple enjoy their honeymoon in Wales. I assume they’re going to Wales. When I asked the Groom his plans for after the wedding he said he was going to Bangor for a fortnight.”

“I read somewhere the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the Groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen, please raise a glass to the happy couple!”

“Firstly, I’d just like to say how nervous I am to be making this speech. I’ve lost count of the amount of times I’ve stood up from a warm seat with warm pieces of paper in my hand today.”

“If you could keep the clapping and cheering to a minimum today – I’ve got a terrible hangover. I know you shouldn’t drink heavily before a big event but I couldn’t let the Groom drink alone, could I?”

“I always knew the Groom’s speech would be hard to follow. In fact, I couldn’t understand a word of it.”

best man jokes pullquote

“For those of you who don’t know me, my full name is actually ‘[best man’s name]-would-you-like-a-drink’. For anyone who I chat to later, if you could use my full name in the bar area please.” “I heard there was a sweep stake on the length of the best man’s speech. I just went for 35 minutes – so settle in…” “Where do I start with the Groom? He’s handsome, witty, intelligent… sorry [Groom’s name]… I’m having trouble reading your handwriting. Tell me the rest later.” “I did ask for a microphone but was told there weren’t any available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence at the front should assure you that you’re not missing out on anything.”

best man jokes pullquote

“The Groom and I share a common sense of humour. So if this speech is in any way unfunny, feel free to blame him.”

“I have no problem admitting to you all that I’m extremely nervous right now. And as the people sitting near the front of the room can attest, it is actually possible to smell fear.”

“Twenty years ago, the Groom was told by a doctor that he would never dance normally again. When the band starts, you’ll see exactly what that specialist was talking about.”

“What a pleasure it is to be Best Man at this wedding. The Groom made me compete for this honour today, but I was able to beat the Bartender over there in rock-paper-scissors, so here I am!”

“The Groom was telling me that the amazing meal this evening was charged on a cost-per-head basis, so, on the Bride and Groom’s behalf, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming…”

“[Groom’s name] was in a pub when he proposed. It was actually very romantic – he got up on one knee.”

“[Groom’s name] is always thinking of others, an attribute welcomed by [Bride’s name] in every place except the bedroom.”

“Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen. I must inform you that I’ve had rather a heavy night and I’m still feeling a little fragile. Therefore please spare a thought and try not to clap and yelp too loudly during my speech, however tempting that might be. You’d think I’d know better than to be out boozing in the early hours just before a big wedding, but I don’t like to see [Groom’s name] drinking alone.”

“Before I start ladies and gentlemen, let us observe a few moments silence in memory of the 3,000 prawns, 200 chickens, countless carnations, delphiniums, lilies and roses who selflessly gave their lives to make this wedding celebration possible.”

“Who here thinks that [Bride’s name] is just marrying [Groom’s name] for his body? I bet a tiny part of him hopes so. And I bet we can all guess which part.”

“[Groom’s name] is the kind of guy you don’t have to worry about introducing your parents to. That’s why [Bride’s name] didn’t worry about introducing him to theirs until today.”

“Marriage is grand – and divorce is about 10 grand.”

[Bride’s name] please put your left hand flat on the table. [Groom’s name] please place your hand on top of hers. Enjoy this moment [Groom’s name] because it’s the first and last time in your marriage that you’ll have the upper hand.”

“Good evening everyone. I’m so happy to preside over the only five minutes that the bride didn’t plan.”

“[Bride’s name], you’re a wonderful woman, who deserves a wonderful husband. And I’m not going to rest until I get to the bottom of what’s gone wrong here.”

“Seeing the happy couple walking down the aisle earlier today, I’m sure we all agree that the bride looked simply stunning. The groom, on the other hand, simply looked stunned.”

“Hello! I’m [Groom’s name]’s best man. He told me if I do a good job today I can be the best man at his next wedding too.”

“I spoke to some of [Groom’s name]’s colleagues and they told me he’s something of a God at work. He’s rarely seen, holier than thou and if he does any work it’s a bloody miracle!”

“Isn’t it funny how history has a habit of repeating itself? Twenty-nine years ago [Bride’s name]’s parents were sending her off to bed with a dummy. And tonight they’re doing exactly the same thing again!”

“I have been [Groom’s name]’s mate since Wednesday this week. I was the successful applicant to an ad he put online asking to pose as his friend. Apparently I got the position by default having been the only one to apply.”

“On their first date, [Groom’s name] thought he’d make an impression, and promised a seven course meal. She was a tad disappointed when it turned out to be a burger and a six pack!”

More jokes: 28 Star Wars jokes that will make you laugh (and cringe) 41 of Bill Bailey’s most gleefully funny jokes and one-liners 25 hilarious dad jokes you’ve probably never heard before 40 of the funniest jokes about Brexit 25 of Spike Milligan’s greatest gags 100 of the best clean jokes and one-liners 25 of Peter Kay’s most ingenious jokes and one-liners 26 of Stewart Lee’s most gloriously acerbic jokes 49 of Monty Python’s funniest jokes 45 of Ricky Gervais’ funniest jokes 17 of Ken Dodd’s most ingeniously funny jokes 27 of Sarah Millican’s laugh out loud jokes 50 of Jimmy Carr’s funniest jokes and one-liners 50 of Milton Jones’s most ingenious jokes and one-liners 50 of Tim Vine’s most ingenious jokes and one-liners 50 of Frankie Boyle’s funniest (and darkest) jokes 25 of Charlie Brooker’s most cutting jokes and insults 25 of Lee Mack’s wittiest jokes and one-liners 75 of Billy Connolly’s best jokes, one-liners and quips 30 of the best-ever jokes about Scotland – from Scotland …and some quotes: 64 of the funniest Seinfeld quotes to sum up everyday life 100 of Homer Simpson’s greatest quotes 50 of Terry Wogan and Graham Norton’s most scathing Eurovision quotes 27 brilliantly funny quotes from This Country 50 of the funniest (and most puerile) quotes from The Inbetweeners 20 of the most absurdly funny quotes from Nathan Barley 39 of the greatest Brass Eye and Day Today quotes 25 of the most outrageous Summer Heights High quotes 25 of Rik Mayall’s greatest quotes 25 of the funniest ever Still Game quotes 50 of the funniest Father Ted quotes Red Dwarf: 30 of the funniest quotes and one-liners Derry Girls: 35 of the funniest quotes and one-liners 25 of the most cantankerous Martin Crane quotes from Frasier 25 of the most ‘textbook’ Alan Partridge quotes 50 of the best lines from Peep Show 20 of The Young Ones’ most gloriously silly quotes 20 of Malcolm Tucker’s most cutting insults 25 of the greatest Absolutely Fabulous quotes, darling The 20 most nonsensical quotes from the W1A team 50 of the funniest Friends quotes and jokes

Most Read By Subscribers

Iamthebestman

  • What to expect from being a best man
  • Best Man Checklist
  • Compare Stag Do Prices
  • Stag Do Ideas
  • Stag Do Destinations
  • Stag Do Guides
  • Top 10 Stag Destinations
  • Best Stag Operators 2016
  • Awesome Stag Pranks
  • Stag Do Concierge Service
  • Organising a Stag Do
  • Best Man Speech Guide
  • Best Man Speech Examples
  • Professional Best Man Speech Writers
  • Free Public Speaking Course

Best man speech jokes and one liners

  • Advice to the groom
  • How to be funny!
  • Public Speaking
  • Conquer the nerves
  • Best Man Suits
  • Best Man Shirts
  • Best Man Cufflinks
  • Tying a cravat
  • Best Man Socks
  • Stag Do Costumes
  • Stag Do Accessories
  • Gifts for the Best Man
  • Gifts for the Groom
  • Stag Do Hats
  • Stag Do Dares

Save on your stag do   Compare stag do prices from some of the UKs leading providers

It always settles the nerves when you get a laugh so here’s a few best man speech jokes and one liners to give you a bit of inspiration. You will obviously have your own style and sense of humour so you may wish to adapt or not use at all! Hopefully they give you a bit of food for thought for the wedding day.

It has been a very emotional day ……..as some of you must have noticed that even the cake is in tiers.

I read somewhere that a best man speech shouldn’t take any longer than it takes the groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen – I give you Mr and Mrs Owen. (Take drink and sit down).

Ladies and Gentlemen: you are all about to witness a unique event in history.  The very first and very last time that my wife is going to let me speak on behalf of both of us.

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt.  Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!

I heard there was a sweep stake on the length of the best mans speech. I just went for 35 minutes – so settle in…….

No seriously this speech will be a bit like Clive short and not very funny…..

I didn’t really know where to start so I thought I’d trawl the internet. After a couple of hours I‘d found some really, really good stuff.  But then I remembered that I was supposed to be writing a speech.

You’ll need a prop for this one – a heavy stack of cue cards that might be used as memory joggers for your speech. “I caught up with Martin’s mum earlier and she told me that I wasn’t to mention any of the incidents with his ex-girlfriend [pause and put a third of the cue cards on the table], alcohol, [pause and put the second third of the cue cards on the table] or the police…[put the remaining cards down and start to gently whistle to yourself]…well that’s that then!”

Stuart’s had some dodgy girlfriends over the years. I never forget a face but in their case I’d be glad to make an exception

Mark has always been a bit of a hypochondriac but I think he learned his lesson during exam time when he took a sleeping tablet and a laxative in the same night. That was a messy one!

Well, I do hope that Howard and Mary enjoy their honeymoon in Wales. I assume that’s where they’re going anyway… When I asked Howard what he was doing after the wedding he said he was going to Bangor for a fortnight…

Well, what can I tell you about the groom? I’ve know him for about 10 years, he’s handsome, intelligent, witty, charismatic..sorry, wrong wedding.

There is an unwritten rule of wedding etiquette that states that nobody should look more handsome than the groom and I’d like to thank our ushers Dave and Parry for sticking to that rule to the letter. I’m not quite sure that saying “You’ll sit where you’re ruddy well put” was really in the spirit of the day, but we’ll let that pass.

For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Matt. I have been Tim’s mate for 2 days now, he found my advert on a website as he hasn’t got many friends so had to hire someone for the day.

I am actually a little nervous doing this, but I feel a bit comforted by the fact I have actually rehearsed this speech in front of a live audience at the local old peoples home, … I think it went well,they all peed themselves anyway.

– Nobody ever seems to pay the Groom a compliment, I think you”ll all agree Mike is also looking pretty good. For those of you who don’t know Mike is actually one of the hairiest men in Britain, with that in mind I’d like to thank the staff at Chester Zoo’s Ape and Monkey House on Mike’s behalf for their help in getting him ready for today.

I can only say in my defence that Mike and I share a common sense of humour so if this speech is in anyway unfunny please “Feel Free to Blame Mike.”

I’d also like to congratulate Keith on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it. During the service today I couldn’t help thinking its funny how history repeats itself, I mean it was 30 years ago David and Pam were sending their daughter to bed with a dummy………and it’s happening all over again today.

Apparently the continents of Europe and America are moving towards each other at a rate of about 5 cms a year. Now this is very slow progress. Scientists have actually created a scale to measure things that move very slowly known as the Sam Davies scale as it based on the time it has taken him to make an honest woman of Sam!

For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Ollie and for those of you that do … well I apologise. My full name is actually ‘Ollie would-you-like-a-drink’ For those of you who I chat to in the bar later, I’d appreciate it if you could use my full name.

Firstly I’d just like to say I’m very nervous about making this speech. In fact this must be the third time today that I have stood up from a warm seat with pieces of paper in my hand.

I decided to look up Dan’s date of birth on the Internet to see what momentous events took place on his birthday. Unfortunately nothing much seems to have happened. Although the nurses on the ward where Dan was born still refer to that day as Ugly Thursday!

Unaccustomed to public speaking as I am, I have been fairly nervous before today’s speeches, however Gav was very good and took me aside to help calm me, he said if I did a really good job and went easy on him, I could be the best man at his next wedding.

Now I have a few cards to read out from those who couldn’t make it today:

Dear Mike, Thanks for the weekends lazing by the pool, I do hope you’ve made the right choice. Love Michael Barrymore. Dear Emma, It was nice while it lasted, but I guess we’ll have to call it a day now you’re married. From Brad Pitt

John did tell me that the vicar was firmly against sex before marriage. However, Jane did assure him it would only take a couple of minutes.

So where do I start with Marc? Well for starters he’s…Handsome, Witty, Intelligent, He’s Char… Charm…. Sorry…Marc …. I’m having trouble reading your handwriting, you can tell me the rest later.

What are these you ask yourselves – well they’re Tom’s Chastity pants. [Hold up boxer shorts & padlock] Sarah has been making him wear these for the past four years keeping his crown jewels securely under lock and key. She thought that only one key had been made. But rumour has it that copies were made of this key by Tom and he has been giving these keys out to various ladies over the past few years without Sarah knowing. If anyone out there has any of these keys could we please have them back in now as Tom is married and completely out of bounds to any girl but Sarah. [Wait for keys to come back in, after being given out strategically to men, aunts etc] You dark horse Tom!

Now I did ask for a microphone but was told one wasn’t available. So if you can’t hear me at the back, the silence from the people at the front should re‐assure you that you’re not missing out on anything.

There was one time when Mike was asked, ‘What is Emma’s favourite flower?’ To which he had no hesitation in replying, ‘Self Raising!’ ‘What makes a good wife?’ ‘One who helps her husband with the washing up!’ And, ‘What’s the last thing you’ll say to you wife before going to sleep?’ ‘It doesn’t matter what I say, you’ll buy it anyway’

Leading up to today John and Jane were having an issue with the seating plan. Who would sit comfortably in here & who would have to get up and stand during the speeches so we decided to use wedding present list, biggest presents at front and work it back from there. So hopefully you can hear me at the back when I say on behalf of Jane and John thank‐you very much for the teaspoons

I’ve also spoken to some of Mike’s work colleagues who tell me that his nickname at work is ‘The God’, its true, apparently he makes his own rules and if he does any work it’s usually a miracle.

Rest assured though, unlike most traditional best man speeches, which are full of sexual innuendo, I’ve promised Dan and Anne that if there is anything slightly risqué, I’ll whip it out immediately …

On their first date, Sam took Julie to dinner at one of the poshest restaurants in [location]. All was going splendidly and Sam was delighted when Julie asked him seductively after the main course, if he would like some a little sweeter to follow. Blushing he said, “Oh yes please…” Julie, finding Sam to be the well-mannered chap that he is, said “It’s okay, you needn’t be so polite”, to which he replied “oh, well, in that case, yes please….you, you cow!”

Don’t worry my speech won’t take too long today, because of my throat. Sarah has threatened to cut it if I go on for too long. And Tom has threatened to cut it if I mention anything about the stag weekend in Dublin.

Also, during my research on the internet I also looked into weddings in general, I looked at the three key elements of the wedding service itself: ‐ The Aisle ‐ it’s the longest walk you’ll ever take The Alter ‐ the place where two become one The Hymn ‐ the celebration of marriage I think Sarah must have done the same research as I did, because as she was walking past me, I’m sure I heard her whisper Aisle…altar…hymn, aisle altar hymn. “I’ll alter him”

Now he’s getting a bit older he’s turning his attention more and more to gadgets, constantly buying stuff from ebay, amazon and I want one of those dot com. I swear he didn’t have an interest in women until he overheard someone say the secret to women was knowing what buttons to press.

So, what can you say about a man who came from humble beginnings and is now quickly rising to the very top of his profession based solely on intelligence, grit and the willpower to push on where others might fail? A man who is beginning to distinguish himself amongst his peers and where no‐one can say a bad word against him? Anyway that’s enough about me. I’m here to talk about Dave.

Although Ria did actually tell me Paul has always brightened up her life.  Well she actually said he never turned the lights off but it amounts to the same thing pretty much.

On Richards first date with Ally he thought he’d make an impression, and promised her a seven course meal. She was a tad disappointed when it turned out to be a burger and a six pack!

I spoke to both Sally and Pete before the Wedding and I asked Paul what he was looking for in Marriage – he said “Love, happiness and a long life together.”

When I asked Sally the same question – she replied – A coffee perculator!

Well, she actually said a “perky populator” but I knew what she meant

But I do think you owe me some thanks too Sarah.. For it was part of my extensive list of duties on this amazing day… To keep Simon’s ex Girlfriends away… Although I must admit Ladies and Gentleman… That I did get some help on that… from the recent foot and mouth outbreak…

Speaking of Jane, I would like to say how beautiful she looks today in that fantastic dress …Dan likes it too, as he told me in the church it will blend in just nicely well with the rest of the kitchen.

For those of you on the Bride’s side who are just getting to know him; here is some advice. Never let him date a member of your family.

His colleagues describe him as a first class banker – I may have misheard them.

Someone once said that marriage is a 50/50 partnership, but anyone who believes that clearly knows nothing about women or fractions!

You know, it’s been said that being asked to be best man is like being asked to make love to Camilla Parker Bowles.. It’s a great honour but you don’t really want to do it!

The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.

Then, having duly accepted the honour, I spent a long time wondering how to describe Chris – with the respect due to a man on his wedding day; how to strike the right tone of sincerity, praise and warmth. You see, Chris is a man who truly defies description. I could speak for an hour about him (don’t worry, I’m not going to) and when I’d finished we’d be no closer to grasping the essential essence of my very dear friend… And yet, miraculously, he can be very neatly summed up with a single, internationally recognised hand gesture.

Best man speech jokes and one liners

Free Ultimate Best Man Guide

good one liners for best man speech

Best Man Speech Software

Get help with your best man speech

Compare Stag Dos

Compare Stag Do Packages

Bar Crawl Beauties

Bar Crawl Beauties

  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms and conditions

good one liners for best man speech

  • Bridal Shower
  • Bachelor & Bachelorette Parties
  • Engagement Party
  • Rehearsal Dinner
  • Wedding Checklists
  • Wedding Hairstyle Ideas
  • Wedding Vows Readings
  • Wedding Music

In This Article

  • Jokes Ideas
  • Jokes and Speech Examples
  • How to Prepare Speech
  • Speech Outline
  • Etiquette Tips
  • Wedding Party & Reception

Best Man Speech Jokes That Makes Your Speech Brilliant

Natalia Bayeva

Via Unsplash

The best man is a very important feature at any wedding event. His speech and jokes can set the tone for the night, and this is why best-man speech jokes are so important. If you need some inspiration for the right words to get your audience laughing, below are our expert tips and tricks of the trade.

ADVERTISEMENT

Giving a good best-man speech and cracking funny best-man speech jokes is exciting. Find helpful tips, outlines, and ideas for a good best-man wedding speech.

Quick Navigation

Great Best Man Jokes Ideas

Cormac Lally has been writing speeches professionally since 2013. His clients include professional sportsmen, TV and radio personalities, politicians and plumbers. He shares his expert thoughts about best-man jokes:

“There is nothing as cringe as the recycled best-man jokes. They are often excessively vulgar and have no place at a top table, where your family and friends have gathered to celebrate a wedding. Worse still, in today’s social media age, your embarrassing and low-brow effort may not only be confined to the hotel ballroom and the assembled guests but could land you on the front page of news outlets worldwide, as an eternal reminder of your oafishness and thoughtlessness. This is personified in reality by Justin Johansen’s best man’s speech disaster at Pippa Middleton’s Royal wedding to James Matthews. He may as well have sung a rugby song like Frigging in the Rigging.

If you want to impress your guests, be honest, and have integrity, there are many childhood and adolescent stories about the groom, that have universal appeal to all ages at a wedding. You can give the groom a good roasting, but you must also be complementary, remember you are his right-hand man, his ambassador, you are there to represent him and all that he stands for.”

Powerful one-liners and jokes

One-liners are effective best-man jokes for speech, only if you use them well. Unless you are a comedian, do not try being overly funny because it may backfire. Comedy is natural.

A list of some ideas:

  • Tell the audience a funny story about the newlyweds.
  • Share with the audience a funny and embarrassing story about the groom.
  • If you’re married, share amusing stories of the struggles in marriage.
  • Let the audience know a funny habit that the groom cannot do away with.
  • If he’s untidy:
Back in college when stayed together, I felt like I had a toddler around. I’d keep his socks together and he’d always misplace them after using. I had to label a spot for socks in our closet, so he’d know where to drop them.
  • If he’s a punctual man:
Derek was such a punctual guy in college. So punctual that, while we were waking up, he was already out the door. He eventually kept our seats. Now, his colleagues say they can’t keep up with him. He’s always the first at work.
  • When he’s a deep sleeper:
He is naturally a deep sleeper. He sleeps so deep that when we had a sleepover at some friends, we carried him all the way to the pool and he was still sleeping.
  • For the quiet ones:
Mike is so quiet that sometimes, we check to be sure that he’s alive and has not gone mute.
  • For a highly intelligent friend:
A-ha! My days in college was awesome because of Victor. He is the smart one and I’m the lazy one. Victor is so intelligent that, I don’t prepare for exams. I wait to rehearse with Victor and go write the same in the exams. Guess what? I passed!

70+ Emotional And Romantic Wedding Quotes

70+ Emotional And Romantic Wedding Quotes

Great best man speech examples.

Being a best man is not merely about organizing the stag and delivering a speech; rather, it entails a role that deems you worthy of trust, responsibility, and, above all, honor. Cormac Lally , a seasoned speechwriter since 2013, stresses the gravity of this responsibility, cautioning that the words spoken cannot be retracted. He advises prospective best men to give thoughtful consideration to their words, seeking help if unsure of content or in need of guidance.

Funny best-man speech

“Distinguished guests, can I get your attention for a few minutes? I want to make a toast to Brad and Penelope. Wow! This is really happening. It’s like a dream. When Brad told me to be the best man for his wedding, I was honestly baffled. I felt it was a setup. I mean, Brad knows he owes me one, for every time I took the heat for him. He knows I can’t wait to take my pound of flesh. So why ask me to be the best man? You know, I and Brian have been best friends for 20 years. My name is Henry by the way. I can remember him being big and a bully. He beats me up but would beat up anyone who dares to touch me. He took my bicycle, my toys, and ruined my treehouse. His atrocities are too numerous, and now he’s getting married to an innocent queen. While in college, he always took my shine. With the girls, with the sports, and with the books. He is that good. We have so many memories together but Brian is one thing- loyal. He pushed me and fought for me when necessary. He’s why I never gave up, and I’m here today. He goes all out for the ones he loves. That’s why when Brian introduced me to Pen, I definitely knew she was special. It takes a lot to get Brian. But once you do, he sticks. I also knew she was in deep trouble. Brian is a pest, he will even offer to put you to bed. But who wouldn’t fall for such a woman? She’s so beautiful and her laughter is contagious. You two are a perfect fit. They say marriage can’t survive without laughter and I don’t believe there will be a shortage of that with these two. The clown has met his match. If anyone tells you that you’re a clown, smile and say; who’s got the last laugh now? Let’s raise our glass to Brian and Penelope! Here’s to a lifetime of love and laughter!”

Heartfelt best man speech example

best man speech jokes

pasion_eventos via Instagram

“The most genuine importance of marriage is the enchantment of being truly loved by one individual. You two have met up to share your lives and understand your fantasies. Today you are a couple. This is the very first moment of an incredible experience and I’m honored to witness it. Take advantage of all the chances to help each other. I toast to you and I wish you a long marriage. One filled with affection and joy.”

Short best-man speech excerpt

“What an extraordinary day to get hitched! Marriage conveys new duties. Prisca, do not contend with Frank. He is the Lord of your home. You should dress and look in a way that satisfies frank. Always prepare his dinner and allow him to spend time with friends sometimes. Do these little things and your marriage will be a haven of satisfaction. Prisca, bill adores you, and I see how he looks at you. Stay in love, you two. Congrats to the both of you!”

Wedding speech for a brother

best man speech jokes

jeromecole via Instagram

“Hello everyone, I am Brad; best man and sibling to the man getting married. Standing as Sam’s best man is a testament to him that I’m the best. Penelope, I want to thank you especially, for saving my brother. Up until he met you, he worked like a bull. I lost count of how many holidays he cut short, because of work. Now, he doesn’t mind spending some time in bed with you. My brother is deeply in love with you, and it’s a delight to see. I am happy that something as beautiful as you can take his attention. You two are so good together. You are just made for each other and laughter will not cease with you. I will witness your 25th and 50th wedding anniversary. Congratulations to you two. A toast to Sam and Pen!”

Best Man Speech Magic: Crafting Words that Resonate and Inspire

Best Man Speech Magic: Crafting Words that Resonate and Inspire

Helpful tips on how to easily prepare a best man speech.

best man speech jokes groom with groomsmen

chelseawhitephotog

  • Prepare early; it soothes the nerves As the best man, you will be at your busiest from the month leading down to the wedding day. At that point, a lot of things will be on your mind, with more work to do. From rentals to tux fittings, to getting the groom ready. This is the worst time to plan your speech because you won’t be at your best. Your speech for the wedding should be well prepared 3 to 2 months before the wedding. Early preparation saves you a lot of mishaps.
  • Practice makes perfect To make a good delivery of your best man speech, practice often. Practice until you don’t have to use paper and until your stage fright is gone. Practice until you don’t see the audience. Do it in front of your mirror as many times as you can. If you have some best-man speech jokes, include them, so that your audience can vet them. Make a video of you delivering your speech. Be watchful for speech viruses and your mannerisms. Do this till you lock down that speech.
  • Pen it down Regardless of how great your memory may be, we advise you to put your best man speech on paper. Not only does it help for easy rehearsal but it also serves as a backup for your memory. Stress or anxiety can make you forget everything you are prepared for. Putting your speech down in bullet points on paper can save you an embarrassment. It happens to the best of us.
  • Add your signature touch The wedding is about the couple and you are at the wedding for the groom. It will be gracious and more interesting if you add some personal touch to your best man speech jokes. Get creative with tweaking the jokes. Tailor it to suit him, instead of telling a general joke. This will give more life to your wedding speech.
  • Breathe life into the speech Giving your best man speech in a monotone like you were perhaps forced to the wedding, is a no-no. Add some life, be excited and show it. The guests won’t be quite excited about your speech if you do not show excitement while giving the speech. Avoid boring everyone and put yourself into it. If the hype seems to die down, take the attention back to the couple or say some best-man jokes for speech. Compliment them.
  • Be Unpredictable Guests will not enjoy a one-way traffic type of speech for too long. Crack up your guests with your versatility. Hold their attention by making them guess what dimension you will go to or what you will say next. Add best-man speech jokes for humor, a little romance here, and some suspense there. Like an interesting stage play, they will hang on interested till the end.
  • Keep the jokes clean Make all your best man speech jokes about the groom. Do not engage her in the jokes at any cost. She may not take it well and could feel embarrassed. No matter how close you are to the couple, you’re the groom’s right-hand man for the wedding. Focus on him. Keep the jokes nice and simple but most importantly make everybody happy.
  • Always make sure you know your audience This is very crucial, especially if you will be giving some best-man speech jokes. Understand your audience, to know how to phrase your speech. Are they liberal or conservative? Check if they are mainly made up of youngsters or older folks. This will affect the way your best man’s speech will flow through. You can’t have a situation where the older folks getting uncomfortable because of things you said.
  • Know your rightful obligations As the best man, you’re in charge of taking the good wishes of everyone absent from the wedding. You will also acknowledge everyone on behalf of the couple. It is of major importance that everyone who deserves a shout-out is well acknowledged. From the groom to the guests, and bridesmaids down to the bartender and DJ. Do not forget, as it will rule out the opportunity of anyone feeling slighted.
  • Exit with an ovation Have a clear-cut line for the end of your best man speech. This is because your speech will come towards the end of the wedding. A time when everyone is warming up for the after-party. End with some humor and a toast to the new couple . That clearly defines that your speech is over and the wedding is almost over.

Crafting a Memorable Maid of Honor Speech: Tips and Inspiration

Crafting a Memorable Maid of Honor Speech: Tips and Inspiration

How to write – best man speech outline.

Our best man speech outline is a complete guide to creating an awe-inspiring best man wedding speech. This outline is a timely saver for those who dread creating a speech from the start. Make use of the template below. You can tweak it to suit the type of speech you want to give or the wedding style you’re gracing. Take out the ones you don’t need.

  • Let the audience know your name and relationship with the groom.
  • Open with a killer one-liner.
  • Thank the previous speakers.
  • Congratulations the new couple.
  • Shower your friend’s spouse with compliments and let the audience know she is an angel.
  • Poke some funny best-man speech jokes at the groom.
  • Readout messages and well wishes from the absent guests, if any.
  • Close with a romantic, a poetic, a few famous lines, or a poem.
  • Propose a toast

Good Jokes For Best Man: Etiquette Tips

While there are no specific rules for good best-man speech jokes, there are some unspoken practices to abide by. For instance, good jokes should never go overboard; there is an invisible line you should not cross for a joke to be acceptable. There is also a limit to the people that you can make fun of. For instance.

  • You can make fun of the groom. This is your buddy or even your brother, so your best man speech-opening jokes can be about him.
  • Poking fun at the bride on the other hand is sometimes not a good idea, and could come with limitations if you choose to go that way.
  • Jokes about the bride would depend on the type of relationship that you have, and how well you know them. And still, the jokes should not go too far.
  • It is safest to keep the jokes to people in the wedding party that you are closest to. This helps ensure that you won’t be stepping on any toes.
  • When unsure, you can always choose to joke about yourself. No one would be offended by some self-deprecating humor. It is sometimes the best way to get the humor across. This way you can be sure you are not crossing any lines, and you would have less nerves since you’d be talking about someone you know extremely well, yourself.

Some more tips for the best man’s speech and best man’s speech jokes.

  • When giving your introductory line, be sure to thank the other speakers who have gone before you.
  • Congratulate the couple on their union.
  • Don’t forget to say a few nice things about the bride, especially if you choose to give her a good ribbing afterward.
  • Compliment the bridal party, especially the bridesmaids.
  • Attend to any other business, such as reading out messages from the groom, bride, vendor, or guests who couldn’t make it.
  • End your speech with a toast to the couple.

People Often Ask

What is the best man supposed to say.

After giving a superb and hopefully funny introduction, the best man is supposed to thank the other speakers, congratulate the couple, and say a few nice words about them. He could also add a sentimental quote or poem before toasting the newlyweds.

Who should the best man thank in his speech?

The best man would naturally thank the groom during his speech. He could also thank the other speakers at the beginning of his speech and toast the couple at the end.

Reading the best man’s speech at a wedding can cause some men to become nervous wrecks. This is coupled with the pressure of wedding preparations. This post saves the best men the stress of preparing a speech from scratch and flunking it. We have put down tips, outlines, and best-man speech ideas. Ideas that show you how to come up with great best-man speech jokes. We close with different types of best-man speech examples and wish you good luck!

Thank you for reading. Please let us know how we did.

Your feedback helps improve and provide content that matters to you!

Was this article helpful?

Stories You Might Like

wedding games bride groom main shutter

Fun Wedding Games to Entertain Your...

garter toss songs main

20 Wedding Garter Toss Songs For Your...

love songs couple bride groom sunset

Beautiful Best Love Songs For Your...

wedding cerermony music bride groom arch

Wedding Ceremony Music: From Traditional...

wedding decor trends bride unsplash

Top 5+ Wedding Decor Trends Guide For...

pantone color of the year floral wedding aisle peach color flowers featured cocomelodyofficial

Pantone Color Of The Year: 2024 Peach...

wedding-cake-alternatives-featured laombrecreations

Wedding Cake Alternatives 2024 Guide...

wedding readings from literature for couples

Wedding Readings From Literature To...

wedding vows examples her his

36 Wedding Vow Examples To Steal: The...

catholic wedding vows couple bride groom church

Catholic Wedding Vows 101: The Exchange...

wedding cake trends trendy texture white square wedding cake with flowers

45 Beautiful Ideas Wedding Cake 2024

modern love country songs bride outdoor

50 The Most Popular Country Love Songs

25 Free Wedding Planning Checklists

Fill in all required * fields below to receive the checklists bundle.

By submitting this form you agree to receive promotional emails from Wedding Forward about other checklists, wedding planning articles, products, and other wedding related topics. You may unsubscribe at any time. Check out our Privacy Policy for more information.

Science of People - Logo

How To Write A Killer Best Man Speech (With Templates)

A funny, heartfelt speech from the best man is one of the most memorable parts of a wedding. Here’s how to give a great toast (without embarrassing yourself).

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter

A best man speech is the perfect way to send your brother or friend the best wishes in their marriage, but standing up in front of the crowd can be super nerve-wracking. If you’ve been invited to be the best man at a wedding but have no idea what to say in your speech, you’re not alone! 

Over 75% of the population cites public speaking as one of their biggest fears. Thankfully, it’s a people skill that anyone can develop. A great event toast can be a game-changer and make you feel like a celebrity amongst the wedding guests. 

Watch our video to learn the best (and worst) speech openers:

Here’s how to overcome your public speaking anxiety and give a knockout best man speech that will incite laughter, smiles, or even sentimental tears. 

Quick Answer: How to Write a Best Man Speech Fast (with Template!)

A killer best man toast has a formula:

  • Start with a funny or complimentary introduction
  • Lead into a short story
  • Add a dash of vulnerability
  • End with genuine congratulations to the bride and groom. 

You won’t want to wing the speech after you’ve had a few drinks when you feel strapped for time before the wedding. Instead, take just 30 minutes of planning and note-making to save you (and the bride & groom) the embarrassment of an excessively long or inappropriate ramble. 

If you want to write a best man speech fast, follow this brief template for a great toast. Your toast should be roughly 3 to 5 minutes long. You can use numbered index cards to jot down the highlights of each section. Then, rehearse a few times in the mirror in the days leading up to the event. 

The most straightforward speech outline includes seven main components: 

  • A great one-liner : This could be a funny joke, a compliment, or an inspirational quote about brotherhood or marriage. The first 15 seconds of the toast should capture the audience’s attention and leave them excited for more. Modify this:

“I’d like to begin by congratulating the groom for his superb taste in choosing the best man [chuckle].” 

  • Compliment the wedding : Build your respect with the guests by highlighting things you like about the wedding. For example, you can compliment the beauty of the venue, the delicious food, or the great choice of music. Modify this:

“All jokes aside, this is a beautiful wedding. The bride and groom look like a movie star couple together. And if you didn’t taste the cake, you are missing out!” 

  • Express gratitude : Say “thank you” to those who made the wedding possible and show appreciation to the groom for choosing you as his best man. Modify this:

“I am so grateful to Mr. and Mrs. Zimerman for hosting us here today, and thank you to the bride and groom for inviting me to be part of their special day.” 

  • Tell a story : Did you and the groom meet as kids on the baseball field? Were you there when he first met his bride? Did you share a funny experience in college that is appropriate to share? The “meat” of the speech will be a short story about your relationship with the groom. A great story sounds like this:

 “When I first met Jeff, he was in a period of transition in life, like we all go through. He had just started a new job at my office in San Francisco, and we met because of our mutual addiction to double shot espressos (iced with a little cream) at 6 AM every morning from the corner coffee shop Bob’s Cup O’ Joe. When we both arrived at the office at the same time, 3 days in a row with eyes like this [widen eyes big], I knew we would be friends for life. A million espressos, meetings, and after-work beers later, I am so proud to call Jeff my best friend. When he told me about meeting a beautiful blonde named Anne at Bob’s Cup O’ Joe a few years later, I knew something would become of it. She even drank the same double shot espressos, iced with a little cream!”  

  • Admire the couple : Strengthen your bond with the newlyweds by expressing your support for their marriage. If you know a bit about the bride and groom’s relationship, list a few things you admire about their bond. You may emphasize how the bride has positively impacted the groom’s life or how they make a great team. 

“Jeff and Anne are a perfect pair, and it seriously warms my heart to see a couple so amazingly in love. They compliment each other in every way and radiate joy when they are together.” 

  • Summarize your thoughts : Before you wrap up your speech, go back and highlight your key ideas. You can pre-write 2-3 crisp sentences summarizing your support of the couple’s marriage. Modify this:

“I wish I could say I predicted this day would come, but Jeff’s incredible character and charm won Anne over. I am so grateful to be friends with both of them and to join you all in this celebration.” 

  • Toast to the future : At the end of your speech, raise your glass for a toast to the couple’s love. Modify this: 

“Please join me in raising our glasses to a lifetime of happiness and espressos for Jeff and Anne Allison!” 

Here is an awesome example of a short and sweet 4-minute toast that left the crowd cracking up:

It’s best to memorize your speech, but there is no shame in bringing a few index cards in your pocket to reference if you get nervous. Don’t forget to prepare and rehearse in advance. 

For a more in-depth speech, see our step-by-step guide below. 

What to Say in a Best Man Speech (Do’s and Don’ts)

A best man’s speech traditionally takes place at the wedding reception after the maid of honor gives her speech. The best man’s speech should be positive, respectful, and congratulatory. It can last 3 to 5 minutes and should focus on a central theme or story about the groom. 

Remember, a best man speech is not the time to “wing it.” If you do that, there may come the point when everything suddenly goes silent, and a crowd of 50-100+ people is staring at you, waiting for what you’re going to say about the groom. You probably don’t want to end up with a cringing audience while telling a story about the groom’s previous relationships:

Instead, remember these key best man speech tips for a successful toast: 

Pre-plan your speech with a layout and index cardsDon’t wing it or try to go on the fly
Keep your speech 3-5 minutes longDon’t give an excessively short or long speech
Open with a catchy one-liner or jokeDon’t start with a dull or droning tone 
Tell a short story about the groomDon’t make it about you 
Use fun, family-friendly humorAvoid risky or inappropriate topics and jokes
Use deep breathing to calm your nerves before the speech Don’t drink too much 
Congratulate the groom Don’t ignore the bride
Compliment the brideInsult or tease the bride (I know it may be tempting, but it NEVER goes over well)
Read the room and get to know the guestsDon’t use profanity (unless it’s acceptable in the family)  

Here are a few examples of what you should say in a best man speech:

  • How did you meet the groom?
  • What is one of your favorite memories with him?
  • How did the groom meet the bride? Were you there?
  • What is special about the groom?
  • What do you like most about him? 
  • What are his positive traits? 
  • Playful banter : You don’t want to be too corny and cheesy with your bro. Depending on your relationship with the groom and the culture of the wedding, you may want to throw in a little banter with your dude. For example, you might make a funny joke about how much the groom loves going out to eat:

You should also avoid some key topics in a best man speech. 

Do not mention:

  • The groom’s past relationships
  • Sexual jokes
  • Drugs, alcohol, or past mistakes
  • Insecurities of the groom
  • Financial or personal information 
  • Insults to the bride or the wedding guests 
  • Overly embarrassing stories
  • Teasing the bride
  • Anything that could potentially harm your friendship

Keep things positive and lighthearted. While a little witty banter or playful teasing can be fun (depending on your relationship with the groom), you should avoid insulting him or highlighting any major insecurities. The “playful” part of the speech is an excellent fun icebreaker, but it shouldn’t hurt anyone’s feelings or make them feel publicly embarrassed in front of their wedding guests.

How to Write a Best Man Speech for Best Friend or Brother: Easy Step-by-Step Guide

If you’re ready to prepare something more in-depth than the quick ideas above, this step-by-step guide can help you write a thoughtful speech that the groom may remember forever. After all, being named the best man at your friend or brother’s wedding is a tremendous honor. But like any honor, it comes with some responsibilities. After you finish all your bachelor party and wedding duties, an epic best man speech can be like the fireworks at the show’s end. 

Here are 5 simple steps to make it count:

#1 Start with a theme

Before you start writing and rehearsing your speech, it helps to decide on a theme for your talk. This will give a nice flow to the speech. A theme ensures that you stay on track to communicate your congratulations and appreciation to the groom. 

What is the main message you want to get across? A few theme ideas include:

  • Anecdotes : Best man toasts center around storytelling. This theme is the easiest way to stay on track because you are telling a simple story from beginning to end. 
  • Humor : Whether you’re naturally funny or working on your jokes ,  your speech is the perfect opportunity to get the audience laughing. Best man speeches are known for getting a little saucy, but you must be careful about offending the crowd or making crude jokes that might insult the bride and groom. If you want to tease the groom with some witty banter, it helps to make fun of yourself or reference an appropriate inside joke.
  • Inspirational : Have you and the groom achieved an important business goal or accomplishment together? Do you have a shared role model or favorite motivational book you both read in college? This speech theme can leave the audience feeling inspired.
  • Morality : Use your speech to highlight the great person the groom is. Perhaps you give examples of his integrity, trustworthiness, or generosity. You can emphasize how lucky you are to know the groom and how glad you are that he found a woman to spend his life with. 
  • Sentimentality : When humor and storytelling aren’t your fortes, it doesn’t hurt to get a little corny. Sentimental speeches require a level of emotional vulnerability, but they can leave a huge impact on the newlyweds and their attendees.

#2 Create an outline

You wouldn’t go on a road trip without a navigation system, so don’t go into your speech without a plan. The best toasts and speeches follow the same structure. Pull out a piece of paper and brainstorm some ideas using this format, then use the following steps to fill in the details:

  • Hook/Opening statement : The opening statement should be a 1 to 3-line description about the groom. The first 7 seconds of the speech should hook the audience immediately. It warms them up to you and makes them want to pay attention to the amusing stories. You’ll find an abundance of opening-line ideas in the next section. 
  • Background context : Now comes the why of your speech. This is where the context of your relationship with the groom comes in. You can throw in some funny jokes and a few details about your experience with him. Use this intro to build up the anticipation for the story to come. Write down a few ideas of stories you can tell. 
  • Tell the story : Choose 1-3 short stories about the groom that is funny, slightly embarrassing, or interesting. Jot down a few of the sensory elements you want to reference, like the smelly locker room or the squeaking of tire wheels. Most stories follow a bell-curve pattern—they start with an intro, lead to rising action, peak with a capstone moment, then tie back to the beginning. Keep this in mind as you brainstorm and follow the story-planning steps below. 
  • Take-home message : After you get a good laugh or “awww” out of the audience, you’ll want to bring the story back to the beginning. What do you want them to remember about your speech and friendship with the groom? 
  • Thank the wedding party : Use a quick sentence to thank the wedding party and hosts. Express your genuine gratitude for being invited. 
  • Closing toast and congratulations : After wrapping up the story and thanking the wedding party, you should invite the audience to toast the bride and groom with you. For an extra cheery finale, act as if you are speaking on their behalf and include lots of well-wishes for the newlyweds. 

Pro Tip : Before filling in your outline details, watch this video for an overview of how to give a memorable toast. Human behavior expert Vanessa Van Edwards explains the most common mistakes (don’t start with “I,” “me,” or “my”) and a few secrets to getting the audience to perk up in their seats. 

#3 Nail the opening line 

Once you have your outline, it’s time to dig into the details. People decide their first impression of you within 7 seconds, so it’s extra important to nail the opening line of your speech. Best men use this opportunity to crack a joke, compliment the wedding, or set a sentimental tone for the speech. 

Avoid making the first lines about you. No “me”, “I”, or “my”. Instead, start with a juicy or mysterious line about the groom, for example:

I was the groom’s roommate in college.Ben was the self-proclaimed organization king in college. As his roommate, I feared leaving a pen on the desk.
I am the groom’s younger brother.As a kid, the groom was so excited to have a younger brother that he quickly crowned me as his servant for the next 10 years. 
My favorite thing about the groom is his…Tonight you’ll learn why the groom was always… 
My favorite story about the groom was…The best story I have about the groom starts with a greasy cheeseburger and a speeding ticket.

If you need a little inspiration, here are some hilarious and quirky best man speech opening lines: 

  • “Caring, loyal, honest, good-looking, and an all-around-great guy… OK, enough about me, onto the groom…!” 
  • “This is the perfect chance to tell you about [Groom] and how talented, special, smart, good-looking, and… sorry, man, I can’t read your handwriting here.” 
  • “I’d like to give a toast to the bride and groom.” [pull a piece of toasted bread from your pocket and give it to them]
  • “[Groom’s name] is the kind of person you call when you lock yourself out of the dorm bathroom without any clothes on.” 
  • “The bride and groom asked me not to share embarrassing stories or crude jokes during my speech… so that’s it from me! Thanks for listening, everyone.”
  • “I’d like to start by congratulating the groom for his excellent taste in choosing the best man.” 
  • “[Groom] had a tough time choosing his best man. First, he called his most handsome friend, but he said no. Then, he called his smartest friend, and he said no. Then, he called his most successful friend, who also said no. Then he called me, and I said, ‘Bro, I can’t say no to you four times.'”
  • “What can I say about [Groom]? I guess I’ll start at the very beginning. He was born on [groom’s birthday]. Our parents were hoping for a girl, but I’ve always said… close enough.”

Here is a genuinely funny opening line from a best brother wedding speech:

Pro Tip : Don’t forget to pause for laughter. If it doesn’t come, you can chuckle at yourself and cue the audience that they are supposed to laugh by saying, “This is where you are supposed to laugh,” or joking, “Sound guy, can you please cue the laugh track?” Then, keep going with your speech.

Don’t worry. You need not be a jokester to give a great opening line. If you want to go the nostalgic or tearjerker route, be sure it is highly personalized and thoughtful. Here are some sentimental opening line ideas:

  • “There are friends, and there is family, but friends also become family. This is so true for [Groom] and me. We’ve been best friends since we were X years old, and I’ve always considered him my brother.” 
  • “There’s an old Irish proverb that says a good friend is like a four-leaf clover—hard to find and lucky to have. I think that’s true. Good friends are hard to find, and I’m lucky to have called [Groom] my best friend for the last X years.” 
  • “I’ve heard that the best relationships come from the foundation of a deep friendship. Experts say that laughter, mutual respect, and enjoying each other’s company are the ingredients for a long-lasting, joyful marriage. After knowing [Groom] and [Bride] for X years, there is no doubt in my mind that they will make a great pair.” 
  • “In Good Will Hunting , Robin Williams said, ‘It doesn’t matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect as long as they are perfect for each other.” Anyone who has seen [Groom] and [Bride] together can agree that this is true for them. I haven’t seen a perfect pair, and I’m happy to be part of this celebration of their love.” 

To learn more about the best speech openers, use this guide on How to Start a Speech: The Best (and Worst) Speech Openers . Some top tips include:

  • Avoid starting with a lackluster nicety like “thanks for having me.” 
  • Don’t mention your nervousness.
  • Avoid mentioning technical difficulties like the microphone or saying, “Can you hear me?” 

How To Write A Killer Best Man Speech (With Templates)

Bonus Tip: Learn the Art of Stage Presence

Did you know that public speaking is actually a skill? Many people struggle with stage anxiety because they feel they ‘missed the memo’ on public speaking or they are lacking because they do not have a natural stage presence. Not true!

Stage presence and public speaking are skills you need to be taught—very few people have them naturally. 

Watch our video to learn 7 steps to overcome stage fright and beat performance anxiety:

Here are all the aspects of public speaking you can master.

  • How to make a first impression with an audience
  • How to have stage presence
  • Powerful body language
  • How to speak with a commanding voice
  • What to do with your hands while speaking

For every speaking skill you add to your toolbox, the less speaking anxiety you will feel.

If you want help really diving into your presentation skills, be sure to sign up for our course…

pointing in photos

Master Your People Skills

  • Create a Memorable Presence
  • Communicate with Confidence
  • Achieve Your Goals

Have a question about the presentation or People School? Email Science of People support .

#4 Background context

Now that you’ve grabbed the audience’s attention, it’s time to give them a little background on why you are giving a speech in the first place. This is another sneak peek at some details you’ll cover in the speech. 

The whole point of this part is to tell them how you know the groom—but it isn’t about you. You’ll often hear wedding speeches that start with a drab, “I met the groom in college” or, “My name is ___, and I’m the best man.” You can do better than that! Try saying:

  • “The groom was the first friend I made on the high school football team. I had no idea we would become roommates in a bachelor pad throughout college.” 
  • “As little kids, the groom and I were known to be a dangerous duo in the neighborhood. He always carried the eggs and toilet paper, then instructed me where to throw them. But you can guess who always took the blame for his antics….” 
  • “The groom and I have been friends and business partners for X years, and as you’ll hear shortly, he is the main reason I broke my arm during the last office basketball game. But first, I want to tell you a less embarrassing story….” 

Pro Tip : Focus on the groom, and don’t make it about you. One of the biggest mistakes people make during wedding speeches is talking too much about themselves. Your speech shouldn’t discuss where you’re from, what you think, or how you ended up at the party. The best man’s speech is a time to focus on the groom and his bride. 

#5 Tell the story  

After your punchy opening line and background info, it’s time to tell the perfect story about the groom. Depending on the length of your speech and the details of your story, some best man speeches cover 1 to 3 short stories. 

Reference back to the memories you wrote when brainstorming. Pick a story that includes the most of these captivating elements:

  • A little bit of embarrassment : Whether it’s you, the groom, or a mutual friend, it helps to poke some fun at someone in the story. If you fear being offensive, the best person to joke about is yourself.  
  • Audience member references : You can get major bonus points if you bring wedding guests into the storytelling moment. You might say, “Mom, you might want to close your ears on this one!” or, “Brian, we’re talking about you!” 
  • Sensory details : What did the scenery look like? What were the prominent smells, sounds, and tastes at the moment? A great story should make the audience feel like they were with you. Don’t forget to mention the frigid cold lake you jumped into or the outrageously spicy food that left you both panting and crying for water. 
  • A final punch line : Ideally, the best story ends with a shocking moment or funny line. It should leave the audience laughing, crying, surprised, or even gasping. For example, in an epic adventure story about you and the groom on a hunting trip, you may end with, “Just as the shark was about to bite the line, Joe reeled in the massive bluefin and yelled, ‘I think we’re gonna need a bigger boat!’”

Pro Tip : If you have to ask, “Is this appropriate?” it probably isn’t. Some stories are better for late-night beers than they are for weddings. Avoid telling stories related to sexual topics, drugs, alcohol, illegal activities, or anything you wouldn’t want grandma to hear. 

#6 Take-home message

When the story finishes, you’ve hopefully elicited some laughter or maybe some tears. All jokes aside, there is a reason you were the best man, and you are probably a significant person to the groom. This is a great time to emphasize the best qualities of the groom and why you’re so happy for his new love. 

Here is an excellent example of tying together the opening and closing lines with a heartfelt message about finding the perfect soul mate:

#7 End your speech with a heartfelt toast

We’ve all heard “let’s raise a glass to [Bride] and [Groom]” before. You can do better than that! The final toast is like the fireworks at the end of your best man speech. Instead of something mediocre, invite the audience to join you in a genuine, thoughtful congratulations. Examples include:

  • “Please join me in raising our glasses to the beautiful bride and handsome groom. May your lives together be long, healthy, and happy. We love you so much and are excited for you. Cheers!” 
  • “Lift your glasses to thank Mr. and Mrs. [Bride’s Parents] for hosting this beautiful wedding. Let us all toast to the perfect union of the bride and groom. We wish you a bright and beautiful future. Cheers!”
  • “Here’s to the past, for all you’ve learned. Here’s to the present for this beautiful moment we all share. Here’s to the future for all you’ve got to look forward to. Cheers to the happy couple!” 

Pro Tip : Make your toast inclusive and communal, so the audience feels like they’re cheering for the couple with you. Use words like “we”, “lets”, and “us”. This congratulation invites them to join as if you are speaking on their behalf. 

#8 Use a best man speech template

A template makes things simple if you’re still feeling uneasy about writing your best man speech. You can take the structure of an example speech and incorporate your ideas and stories to make it your own. 

Best man speech example for a best friend :  

“Tonight, you’ll learn why the groom was destined to marry [Bride]. The year was 2002, and we were all in a bar with friends on New Year’s Eve in New York City. Snow was falling outside, and we were sipping champagne, waiting for the big ball to drop. Seemingly out of nowhere, a woman with a red dress entered the room, and everything seemed to stop. All the bachelors in our group were captivated, but only [Groom] had the guts to walk up to her. Rumor has it that his first opening line was ‘

Everyone talks about a woman’s glow when she’s falling in love, but I swear that [Groom] was smiling from ear to ear from the second they met. We could hardly get him to stop talking about her by the following week. We’d be watching football and drinking beers only to have [Bride’s] name brought up every 5 minutes. 

Fast forward 3 years, and we’ve all seen how much [Bride] has positively impacted his life. When he came to me to tell me he was proposing, my only response was, ‘ Finally, dude !’

There’s something extra special about these two. They go together like peanut butter and jelly. They love and respect each other so much. [Bride] was the one for [Groom] from the second they locked eyes in that hazy NYC bar. We are all so happy to be here for your big day. Let’s raise our glasses to the beautiful bride and groom! Cheers!” 

Another Best man speech example for a best friend :  

“The groom was the first friend I made on the high school basketball team. He wasn’t very good [pause for laughter]. I was the tallest player and obviously had the best free throw, but I was majorly lacking in the ladies department. Thankfully, [Groom] took me under his wing and showed me how to be a true gentleman. That includes opening doors for women and carrying their bags instead of just running in with my own. What would I have done without you, man?

Even though he was no good at basketball, [Groom] always had his head on his shoulders. He’s a respectful, intelligent, and relatively clean-cut guy. All joking aside, it’s no surprise that he ended up with a woman as intelligent and beautiful as [Bride]. You both deserve a lifetime of love, happiness, and success together. Please raise your glasses and join me in congratulating the bride and groom! We love you!” 

#9 Practice your body language

Public speaking isn’t only about what you say but how you carry yourself. Your body language can drastically affect your confidence, your delivery, and how the audience perceives you. Use these body language hacks to take your speech to the next level: 

  • Signal “friend” : Smile and show your open palms to send the message that you are the audience’s friend. This makes people feel more comfortable with your presence and more likely to listen.
  • Stand up straight : When you look confident, you also feel more confident. Check your posture if your voice is a little shaky before the speech. Roll back your shoulders and tuck your shoulder blades down towards your back. Slightly lift your chest and chin as you speak. 
  • Make eye contact: Throughout the speech, you should change your eye contact with different audience members. As you mention specific compliments or thanks, make eye contact with the bride, groom, groomsmen, bridesmaids, and the bride’s father.
  • Genuinely smile : Smiling may seem obvious, but it’s easy to forget when you feel so focused on a perfect delivery. At the same time, you don’t want to look like you’re fake smiling throughout the speech. Use these 9 Simple Tips to Smile Better (in any situation!)
  • Use your hands : It’s easy to let your nerves get the best of you and feel like a “deer in the headlights.” Instead of tucking your hands in your pockets, widen your stance and take up space. Use your hands and gestures while you talk to show that you are comfortable and happy during the speech. 

Want more tips? Here are 17 Body Language Presentation Cues to Use in Your Next Speech . 

#10 Rehearse before the big day

Experts say you should rehearse a speech 10 times before performing it. Research also shows that people who mentally prepare themselves before a speech by imagining it going well are more likely to perform fluently and easily. So before you get in front of an audience, be sure you’ve gone over your speech at least 10 times, either in your head or out loud. Better yet, practice in the mirror, on camera, or in front of a trusted friend. 

It also helps to review the gist of the speech with the groom (without giving away any secret details) to make sure it’s alright with him. A few weeks before the wedding, you may pull him aside and ask, “Hey man, is it OK if I tell the story about ____ in my best man speech? I think it’ll get some good laughs.” 

Although this example is long, this best man very clearly rehearsed his speech for a near-perfect performance without any notes:

Key Takeaways: Express Gratitude and Sentimentality in 3-5 Minutes

Ultimately, a best man speech is an opportunity to make your best bro look good in front of all his friends and family. Your speech should demonstrate how much you value your brotherhood or friendship. At the same time, you can enjoy 5 minutes of wedding fame without making things all about you. A great toast can make you a memorable celebrity at the wedding and have people laughing at your

Before jumping up at the reception and speaking off the cuff, remember to:

  • Outline and plan your speech ahead of time. Use notecards if needed.
  • Focus on the groom and his bride. Don’t go on and on about yourself. 
  • Nail the opening line with a funny joke, quote, or teaser that leads into a great story. 
  • Avoid inappropriate or cringey topics that could embarrass the groom.
  • Express gratitude to the groom and wedding hosts. 

Giving a toast or speech is an essential social skill that can make you one of the most likable people in a room. If you want to learn more about the art of giving showstopping toasts, read this guide on How to Give an Awesome Toast: Advanced Strategies for Speeches . 

Popular Guides

How to deal with difficult people at work.

Do you have a difficult boss? Colleague? Client? Learn how to transform your difficult relationship. I’ll show you my science-based approach to building a strong, productive relationship with even the most difficult people.

Related Articles

Science of People offers over 1000+ articles on people skills and nonverbal behavior.

Get our latest insights and advice delivered to your inbox.

It’s a privilege to be in your inbox. We promise only to send the good stuff.

good one liners for best man speech

Best Man Speeches – Examples, One-Liners, & Tips

Are you the best man looking to deliver a speech that everyone remembers? We know how important the moment is, and we’re here to help.

We’ve put together some great outlines of how you can build your best man speech. In each of our speech examples, we’ve highlighted a foolproof way to accomplish your desired tone.

Whether you want your best man’s speech to be funny and lighthearted or serious and inspirational, you’ve come to the right place to find ideas that will jumpstart the creative process. We will teach you how to relieve a bit of the pressure with a joke initially, get into some details about how you met the couple and what they mean to you, and then ultimately deliver the final epic toast that gets people on their feet.

We’re excited to share with you all the tips, tricks, and planning tools needed to create an excellent best man speech, including awesome examples to guide you along and inspire you.

Staff filling champagne glasses at wedding

Use Our Quick Nav Guide:

Examples by tone.

  • Funny Best Man Speech Example
  • Heartfelt Best Man Speech Example
  • Upbeat Best Man Speech Example

Examples by Length

  • Short Best Man Speech Example
  • Medium Best Man Speech Example
  • Long Best Man Speech Example

Examples of Speech Components

  • Introductions for Best Man Speech
  • One-liners for Best Man Speech
  • Toasts for Best Man Speech

How to Write Your Best Man Speech

  • Template / Outline
  • What Not To Say
  • Easy Tips To Make Writing Easy

Best Man Speech Structure

  • How To Write A Best Man Speech

Best Man Speech Tips

Best man speech dos & don’ts, best man speech videos.

  • One of the Funniest Best Man Speeches
  • Awesome Non Traditional Best Man Speech
  • Best Man Speech – Get A Standing Ovation

Best Unrehearsed Best Man Speech

  • Best Man Speech – Irish Guy at Italian Wedding

3 Examples of Funny Best Man Speeches

Relieve a bit of the pressure from creating a chuckle-inducing best man speech using these three examples below as inspiration. Whether you focus on the bride a bit or pick out the most embarrassing story of the groom, you know, some solid one-liners scattered throughout your sentiments will get the job done.

The “Shower Her With Compliments” Speech

“Isn’t [Bride] looking absolutely gorgeous tonight? Not only is she beautiful, though, she’s also caring, sweet and she deserves one hell of a husband. Thankfully for [Groom], she agreed to marry him before she found one.

[Groom] gets to leave tonight having gained a wife with all of the qualities one could dream about having in a partner. [Bride] leaves tonight with a bouquet of flowers she can pop in a vase at home and cherish for a few days to come.”

The “We Go Back” Speech

“For those that don’t know me, [Groom] and I go back all the way to middle school. This means we go back to a time when [Groom} looked more like Chunk from The Goonies and less like the suave man sitting before us tricking [Bride] into thinking that watching him do the Truffle Shuffle in the mirror isn’t in her near future.

[Groom] really is the best friend I could have ever asked for. Growing up, we lived across the street from each other, so he was always really more convenient than anything else. The fact that there was an inground pool in his backyard didn’t hurt the relationship either.

But now we sit here [x] years later, [Groom] has grown into a wonderful man, and he’s sure to be a wonderful husband to you [Bride]. As long as you can get past his infatuation with Teletubbies and the fact that he went as Tinky Wink for Halloween in the fourth grade, I think you’ll make it through anything!”

The “Reasons to Marry the Groom”Speech

“Good Evening, everyone! I trust that you’re having a superb night racking up the bar tab. Sorry about that, [Groom].

Ya know, the best man speech is known for throwing out some of the most embarrassing aspects of the groom’s past. Funny stories from middle school or bringing up bad haircuts, but that’s not really my style. Instead, I’d rather make it clear to everyone just why [Bride] has decided to marry [Groom].

There are three rather simple reasons.

Firstly, he’s got really great taste. He did choose me as his best man, after all. He even decided to wear the same outfit as me today.

Secondly, when he loves, he loves hard. There’s nothing this man wouldn’t do for me. In fact, he’s spent 20 years doing nothing for me. See what you have to look forward to [Bride]?

And finally, he’s a handsome fellow. Although standing up here looking at him next to [Bride], you could have done a bit better, hun.”

 Best man pinning Boutonniere on groom before the wedding

3 Examples of Heartfelt Best Man Speeches

If causing a riot of laughs isn’t your style, or you want to instill just how much this day means to you and your family, go with something more serious. Your heartfelt best man speech can make just as big of an impact with a heartfelt sentiment as it can with chuckles from the crowd.

The “Thankful” Speech

“Hello everyone, it’s such a pleasure to be here tonight as [Groom’s] best man. And I want to begin by saying what an honor it is that I was chosen to stand by your side today. You’ve always been someone that I looked up to, and I am just beyond grateful that I get to share in this moment with you and [Bride].

[Groom] is someone that I’ve come to care for greatly over the years, and I am so happy that he’s found someone to share his life with and start a family with. [Groom] has always been my right hand throughout the biggest moments of my life, and I can’t wait to be able to watch everything beautiful unfold for the two of you. Cheers to a lifetime of happiness!”

The “Smart Move” Speech

“There’s an old saying about friendship that reads, “It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them,” and goodness that couldn’t be more true for me and my boy, [Groom].

I could go into all the funny stories that include some of that stupidity, but instead, I’d rather focus on all the smart moves he’s made. His friendships, the relationship he has with his family, his career, it’s all a reflection of the incredible man he’s become. But really, the smartest move he’s made is marrying you, [Bride].

Let’s toast to the best decision [Groom’s] ever made. I wish you a lifetime of love, happiness, and success.”

The “She Was The One” Speech

“Ladies and gentleman, thank you all for coming out tonight to celebrate the wedding of two people we all love, [Bride] & [Groom]!

When I first met [Bride], I knew that she was the woman [Groom] would end up marrying. Even if it hadn’t dawned on him quite yet, it was obvious to everyone around just how smitten he was with her. They talk about a bride’s glow, but this man was shining since the moment he met [Bride]. He changed for the better without realizing it. And we all could see it.

He couldn’t stop talking about her. We’d go out with the boys, and [Bride’s] name would be brought up every two minutes. So when he came to me to tell me that he would be proposing, my only response was, “Well, it’s about time!”

There’s something special about these two. They go together without forcing it. They love each other without fighting it. And they care about each other without thinking about it. She was the one from the very beginning [Groom], and we’re all so happy to be able to take part in your big day. Cheers!”

3 Examples of Upbeat Best Man Speeches

An upbeat best-man speech will keep the celebratory vibe of the evening going without too many tears or glares from Grandma when the jokes go too far south. Check out our easy list of lighthearted cheers that relay your love of the couple and appreciation for your spot as best man.

The “Great Flame” Speech

“I’m so happy to see that everyone is having such a great time tonight! [Bride] & [Groom] really know how to throw a party, don’t they?

They also know how to light a fire. Dante once said, “A great flame follows a little spark,” and we’ve all seen that spark since the very beginning. And tonight, we see the fire.

Cheers to the happy couple, may the flame burn long, and sparks continue to fly!”

The “Brother” Speech

“[Groom] is my brother, so naturally, I have the long list of blackmail quality ammunition to scatter throughout this speech tonight. Don’t get scared, though [Groom], I’ll keep 2005 under wraps and not mention it.

But seriously, when we were younger, we’d do everything together. Attached at the hip, even when we were in a fight, it wasn’t until college that we parted and went down our separate paths. We grew up, started our careers, and he found [Bride]. And I couldn’t be more thankful for you [Bride] and couldn’t be happier for the two of you.

We’re gaining such a beautiful new family member today. You look stunning tonight, sister. Congratulations, I wish you a lifetime of love and happiness. Cheers!”

The “Great Man” Speech”

“What a night it has been! Will everyone please raise their glasses as I toast to [Bride] & [Groom]?

Although my first thought today was, if I’m the best man here, why is [Groom] getting to marry [Bride]?

On a more serious note, [Groom] you’re not only a great man, you really are the best man for [Bride]. And she is the best woman for you. I could sing both your praises all evening, but since I’m a terrible singer, I’ll leave that up to the band and allow everyone to keep their eardrums intact. I’m honored to be by your side today [Groom]; I wish you many years of happiness. Salute!”

Short Best Man Speech Examples

A great best man speech doesn’t have to be long to pack a punch. Add a clever one-liner with a few thoughtful sentiments, and you can get the job done while making it memorable. Here are some incredible examples of short best man speeches .

“Good evening, everyone! Let’s lift our glasses and toast to the newlyweds!

Don’t worry; your arms won’t get tired. My speech is going to be like a mini-skirt: long enough to cover the essentials and short enough to hold your attention.

[Groom], thank you for being such a stable force in my life, a great friend and an even better brother. [Bride], I think we can all agree that you’re stunning this evening and [Groom] won the lottery.

[Bride] & [Groom], tonight we celebrate you. We all wish you a lifetime of happiness, love, health, success, and laughter. May you continue to find humor in the bad and appreciation for the good. May your friendship continue to grow throughout all the years to come. Cheers!”

Medium Best Man Speech Examples

Of course, you can always go the medium-length route. If you’re looking for a best man speech that covers all of the necessary points but gets you out of there before you start to sweat, try out something like this below!

Witty Best Man Speech

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. My name is X, and I was chosen as [Groom’s] best man. Now, the more I think about that title, the more uncomfortable I get. It sort of implies that [Groom] has lots and lots of men, and I’ve been dubbed the favorite of the bunch. If it wasn’t for [Bride], I’d be watching my back later tonight but also a bit flattered, admittedly.

[Groom] and I grew up together. But we weren’t actually friends until we hit high school. And we didn’t become best friends until our 20’s. He needed to grow up a bit before I could take our relationship to the next level.

On a more serious note, this man is one of the highest-quality people I know. You’ve snagged yourself a good one here [Bride]. Hardworking, clever, and he’s a handsome devil too; I have no doubt that he’ll be a great husband and an even better father.

[Bride] balances his awesomeness out quite well. She’s beautiful, obviously. But getting to know her over the years, I’ve found her to be just as hardworking but also an amazing example of what it is to have a kind, giving heart. I watched [Groom] change for the better when they started dating. She softened him. And now look at them; they’re happy, wide-eyed newlyweds that we’re toasting to tonight.

[Groom], I’ll leave you with a little bit of advice that my father gave me the morning of my wedding.

“A real man never stops trying to show a woman how much she means to him, even after he’s got her.” 

I wish you years and years of happiness and love. Never stop going the extra mile for one another. When you feel yourself getting a bit too comfortable and complacent, remember that quote. Spice things up, do small things for one another, and always remind the other of how much you love them.

Cheers to you!”

Long Best Man Speech Examples

Finally, there is the long best man speech. This is a great move for someone extremely close to the groom, or even both the groom and the bride. A brother with lots of stories or a best friend that has seen a lifetime of highs and lows, you can capture it nicely in a lengthy toast to the happy couple.

“If you have no idea who I am yet, I’m [Groom’s] best friend. I’ve been around for a while, about 20 years now. So, naturally, I can tell you a lot about him. He’s handsome, witty, charismatic, intelligent … oh wait … wrong wedding.

There’s a rule, you know, there’s a certain bit of wedding etiquette we guests have to follow. No woman should look better than the bride. And no man should look better than the groom. I’d like to personally thank the ushers for abiding by that rule to the fullest. I’d also like to extend my thanks for showing up sober. You did a great job today, fellas.

Let me go ahead and get some thank you’s out of the way as well. To all of the guests, I want to personally thank you for taking the time to travel here tonight. I know some of you had to take planes or get in the car for several hours to make it and, on behalf of the lovely couple too, we’re so grateful. For everyone who helped to get this party going tonight, from the catering staff to the wedding planners, your professionalism has been superb; thank you. To all of the bridesmaids and the rest of the groomsmen, thanks for helping make everything go off without a hitch today. We nailed it. To the bride and groom’s parents, thank you for raising these two amazing people we’re all here to celebrate tonight. None of our lives would be the same without them, and that’s all thanks to you. And lastly, [Groom] wanted me to thank [Bride] for showing up today. It means more than you know.

[Groom] and I truly do go way back. We go back all the way to middle school. Sitting in homeroom, we watched as the 7th-grade wish list was being passed around the classroom. The problem with this scenario was that we were both in 8th grade, and somehow both ended up sitting in the wrong class with no one that looked familiar for nearly an entire period. We were soulmates.

And for the past two decades, he’s been by my side for every wrong move, every high, every low, and all the biggest moments. I’m so grateful that I was able to be here tonight to celebrate alongside not only [Groom] but [Bride] too.

Their relationship is something to admire. It’s always been easy with the two of them. And I believe that when something is meant to be, there doesn’t need to be a fight. You can see how easy it is for them to love one another, and it’s something that we should all strive for one day, to find a person that is so easy to love you do it without even being conscious of it. [Groom] wakes up in the morning with his heart beating, his lungs breathing, and his entire body-loving [Bride]. It just is. And that’s a beautiful thing.

The night [Groom] came home after his first date with [Bride], he wouldn’t shut up. I was studying for midterms, and he came in with the goofiest, biggest grin on his face. Actually, he almost looked guilty of something. I asked him, “What did you do?”

You want to know what his response was [Bride]?

He said, “I just fell in love.”

And the rest is history. I’ve been saving that tidbit of knowledge for years now. I didn’t want my man to lose any of his street cred, but the jig is up friend, you’re a huge romantic, sap, and we all love you for it.

Now it’s time to raise our glasses and toast to the future of this newly-married couple. May your lives be filled with adventure, overwhelming amounts of movie dates and Friday night pizza, children playing in the backyard, beach vacations, love, laughter, and a blissful marriage through and through. Cheers!”

10 Introductions for your Best Man Speech

Get your speech started eloquently with one of these introductions. Use some of these ideas to jumpstart your writing process and personalize it to your liking. Welcome the guests in style and calm your nerves right from the start.

  • “First, allow me to introduce myself. I’m [Best Man], and it’s both an honor and a pleasure to be standing beside [Groom] today as his best man this evening.”
  • “Ladies and gentleman, I’d like to formally welcome you to the wedding of [Bride] and [Groom]. Thank you so much for coming out and celebrating with us tonight.”
  • “Good evening, everyone! It’s now the point in the evening where some of us have to get up out of our seats and make fools of ourselves. Looks like I’m up first.”
  • “Firstly, I’d like to personally thank you all for coming and celebrating such a special occasion with us.”
  • “Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen; I want to thank you all for coming such a long way to celebrate with us. For those that don’t know me, I’m [Best Man] [Groom’s] brother/best friend/etc.”
  • “Hello everyone! For those that haven’t bought me a drink yet tonight, my name is [Best Man], and I’m a fan of Jack and Coke.”
  • “Hello ladies and gentlemen, I’m [Best Man], and I was chosen to be [Groom’s] best man tonight. Or I was the best he could do. Or I was just the only one that would agree to do it.”
  • “For those that don’t know me, allow me to introduce myself. I’m [Best Man]. And for those that do know me, I apologize.”
  • “I’ve got to say it, ladies and gentleman. Does [Bride] not look absolutely stunning tonight? [Groom] you look alright.”
  • “Good evening, everyone! Before I begin my duty to give [Groom] an uncomfortable, embarrassing few minutes, I want to take the time to say thank you for coming out and celebrating tonight.”

10 One-Liners for Your Best Man Speech

Add a joke or two into the mix of your best man speech and get everyone relaxed and chuckling. This part of the evening is all about light-hearted laughs, and the best man is the go-to choice for getting the party started. Here are 10 one-liners and jokes you can scatter throughout your best man toast.

  • “I heard there was a bet going around about how long the best man speech was going to be. I went in with a 20 on 45 minutes, so get comfortable, everyone.”
  • “The time has come for the groom to get quite uncomfortable in his seat and maybe even shed a tear or two. That’s right; I’m about to hand him the drinks bill.”
  • “[Groom] is the kind of guy you don’t have to worry introducing the parents too. That’s why [Bride] didn’t worry about doing it until today.”
  • “As best man, it is my duty to start telling you all about all of the embarrassing things that have happened to [Groom] in all [x] years of his life up until the happiest day of his life until I started this speech.”
  • “[Bride], you are a wonderful woman who deserves a wonderful husband. And I won’t stop until I get to the bottom of what’s happened here.”
  • “[Groom] has so many wonderful attributes. He’s charming, handsome, witty …. Ummm … I’m sorry [Groom] I’m having trouble reading your handwriting.”
  • “I’m quite nervous. Just ask the people sitting at my table. It truly is possible to smell fear, isn’t it, folks?”
  • “I’m sure you all can agree that it’s been an emotional day. Even the cake is in tiers!”
  • “I was told that the best man speech needed to last for as long as the groom takes to make love. Raise your glasses, everyone!”
  • “Everyone, let me just preface this by letting you know how nervous I am. I’m really not used to public speaking, and when I get nervous, I’ve been known to mispronounce some of my words.”

10 Toasts for Your Best Man Speech

And finally, end your best man toast with an uplifting quote or wish for the happy couple. Toast to the newlyweds and do it in a way that’s both memorable and personal with our help.

  • “Now, please join me in raising your glasses as we toast to the Bride and the Groom. I give your Mr. and Mrs. [x]!”
  • “I would like to wish you a lifetime of health, wealth, happiness, and love. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s toast to the bride and groom.”
  • “What an honor it has been to serve as [Groom’s] best man. And it’s even more of an honor to ask you all to join me in toasting the newlyweds. Cheers!”
  • “Allow me to leave you with this, “there is only one happiness in life, to love and to be loved.” May your happiness last a lifetime. We toast to you.”
  • “Now remember this. There are two things that will make a marriage last: a sense of humor and selective hearing. Cheers!”
  • “Ladies and gentleman, let’s toast to the bride and groom. And leave off with a thought from John Lennon and Sir Paul McCartney, “Love is all you need.”
  • “Let us all wish [Bride] and [Groom] years and years of happiness. May you be friends to each other only as lovers can, and may you love each other only as best friends can.”
  • “Congratulations on this big step in your lives. Let’s all raise our glasses and toast to the happy couple. May years of happiness and amazing memories await you!”
  • “For this is [Bride] and [Groom’s] time. And it’s time to raise your glass high in the air. To the bride and groom! We wish you a long and happy marriage.”
  • “To my very best friend and brother, and to his beautiful new wife, we salute you! Now let’s dance, drink and have a slice of cake!”

Easy Best Man Speech Template to Follow

If you’re starting from scratch, use this fool-proof, easy best man speech template. Follow along as you fill in your own quips and memories throughout your speech. We’ve already inspired you with different examples and even some one-liners to fit inside; now it’s time to start writing!

  • Welcome the guests
  • Talk about you and the groom’s history / Introduce yourself
  • Add in a bit about the groom’s personality, character, and accomplishments
  • Speak about the bride and them as a couple
  • Toast to a happy marriage

10 Things Not To Say In Your Best Man Speech

It’s common knowledge, and expected, for the best man to give the groom a bit of a hard time. Teasing and sharing embarrassing stories are all a part of the fun. But, some things should be avoided completely. When writing out your best man speech, these are 10 things to not ever say or include in the spiel.

  • Leave out the ex-girlfriends – or ex-wives. If there’s an ex at all, don’t mention it.
  • Nix the curse words. Phrases involving any of those four-letter creations should be left out.
  • Never, under any circumstances, embarrass the bride. She should never be a part of the punchline.
  • Don’t mention anything about the bachelor party, especially if it could get him in trouble. Leave it in the past.
  • Dig on the groom a bit but don’t dig on marriage. Your jokes shouldn’t downplay what a big, GREAT step this is for them.
  • Don’t dig on the in-laws either – on either side. Besides, they’re most likely footing the bill for the entire event.
  • “Drunken night” shenanigans can be left out of your walk down memory lane as well.
  • A long list of “umms” or “likes” shouldn’t take center stage.
  • Compliment the bride but don’t be creepy or cross the line.
  • Juvenile jokes like, “We all thought he was gay for so long!” should be left back in middle school.

7 Tips for Writing Your Speech

When it comes time to sit down and write out your speech, take a big, deep breath, you want to sprinkle in some creativity, originality, and some hard work too. It’s okay if you don’t finish it in your first sitting. Allow yourself to become inspired, follow these 10 tips for making writing your best man easy, and you’ll have it ready in no time!

  • Give yourself time. Don’t wait until the night before. You’ll allow your nerves to take over and may get writer’s block if you start writing the last minute. Choose a night when you’re relaxed and let your creativity flow. Try writing out a rough draft a few months before the wedding before you get caught up in all the pre-event activities.
  • Pay attention to your intro. If you start out strong, whether with a great story or a funny one-liner, you’ll have everyone’s attention throughout the entire speech.
  • Write it down. Write it down. Write it down. Yes, this is about writing your speech, but we also want you to make sure you practice it and have it on paper the day of, just in case.
  • Don’t forget a joke . Even if you want to go with a speech that’s a bit more serious and heartfelt, add a few quips or jokes about the groom in there. It helps break up the emotion and provides comic relief.
  • Have a Plan B up your sleeve. Whether it’s a joke or turning to the bride and shining a light on how stunning she looks, plan for a misplaced speech or a case of stage fright.
  • Take a walk down memory lane . Extended family and friends may not know who you are. Let them know and let them in on why you were chosen as the best man.
  • Thank everyone. Finally, you must extend a grateful hand. It’s a nice gesture from the bar staff to the bridesmaids, and it will plump up your speech.

The best man speech format is pretty straightforward. The first part of the speech is geared towards getting guest attention. Ideally, the best man should have a great one-liner to open up the best man speech. See our best man one-liner examples for some inspiration. The next step is to introduce yourself personally and explain who you are to those who don’t know you. Make light of the occasion, maybe talk about the location, the idea of marriage, or something regarding the ceremony. These are all excellent opportunities for amusing asides.

The next part of the best man speech structure is focusing on the groom. To be specific, this is the chance to poke some fun at the groom. Talk about your relationship with the groom, offering guests a funny and entertaining version of how you first met, your first impressions, and why you’re still good friends now. Remember, it can’t all be a comedy, you need to something nice about the groom.

Next, it’s time for the bride. Don’t poke fun at her. Talk about how gorgeous she looks, how much you like her as a friend. This is an excellent time in the speech to talk about why the newly married couple will be so great together.

At this stage, you’re coming towards the end of the speech. Get ready for your toast (see example best man toasts ). You might want to give the bride and groom some sage advice, potentially an amusing observation about marriage. Finish up with a light-hearted toast to the bride and groom.

How To Write a Best Man Speech

Start by writing down thoughts freely about the bride and groom and your relationship with them.

  • How do you know them?
  • Why did they choose you as the best man?
  • How would you describe each of them? What are the first five adjectives that come to mind?
  • What was the groom like before he met the bride? How has he changed knowing her?
  • How did they meet? How did the groom tell you about her?
  • You may wish to think about marriage advice you’ve received or have learned if you are married.
  • Are there any particularly amusing anecdotes that illustrate who the bride and/or groom is?
  • Read through this gallery of sample classic wedding toasts and highlight any that seem particularly appropriate to you.

Once you’ve done that, it’s time to craft those ideas into a heartfelt and entertaining toast. You should have a great framework with which to work.

There are some easy-to-follow tips when preparing your best man speech. Follow these for a seamless and great best man speech:

Be Prepared & Invest Time: Plan your speech ahead of time. Write it down, get ideas and start thinking about it early. There is nothing worse than a best man who walks into the wedding thinking he is going to speak off the cuff. It is evident when you do that, and it usually sucks, so don’t.

It Is About Your Friend & His Wife: It is so easy to come up with jokes and poke fun at your close buddy for 10 minutes. That’s no fun for the rest of the guests, and while you’ll enjoy it, it doesn’t focus on what’s important, which is that your buddy just married the woman of his dreams. Think of stories from you and your buddy’s past that show what a great guy he is, and remember that the speech’s goal is to celebrate the couple and make them look good.

Stay Sober(ish) : Liquid courage is great in moderation. Sure, have a few drinks to calm your nerves, but don’t go crazy early and be messy for your best man speech. It is a pretty simple rule, but just make sure you’re not sloppy drunk.

Open Strong: There is no shame in using a one-liner to get things going. It is essential that you have guests excited, and you build the confidence to deliver an excellent best man speech. Once you have your opening line down, immediately thank all the guests who made the day possible. Single out the bride and groom’s parents by name, and offer a toast to them for not only putting on the wedding but for raising two fine people. Start your speech like this, and you’ll be the best man everybody loves.

Be Yourself (Unless You’re an A**hole) : No need to get formal or try to be someone you’re not. And there’s no need to follow these instructions exactly either. Simply use them as a guide and be yourself. Let it flow naturally. Use your natural voice and mannerisms. Make it personal and sincere and say things from the heart, and you should be golden.

Tell A Nice Story & Make A Connection: The ideal way to structure a best man speech is to find a connection between a story about your friend and your support for the couple. Share a story about how your friend would always lament that he would never find a woman with x,y, and z qualities, but how he finally did in his new bride. Or tell a story about the moment when you were hanging out with the couple, and you realized your friend had found his match. Another good angle is to talk about the way that the bride and groom balance one another.

Don’t Talk About The Groom’s Exes : Keep your speech on topics that aren’t controversial, offensive, or embarrassing. Don’t talk about the groom’s past girlfriends. This is an easy tip to follow; just use some common sense.

No Inside Jokes: This is a crucial rule, yet very hard to execute. You and your friend have stories, inside jokes, and things only the two of you (or a select few of your friends) know about. Now isn’t the time to bring that stuff up. Think about the audience and ensure that whatever you talk about is something that most people can relate to.

Short is Sweet: Everybody hates long speeches. There will be many speeches, and the best man speech usually is last, so guests will be eager for you to finish so they can grab another drink or have a dance. Aim for no more than 7 minutes, max.

End With A Toast & Quote : Don’t reinvent the wheel. There are hundreds of wonderful quotes about marriage, love, and weddings, not to count the Irish toasts you can use to end your speech (we’ve assembled some example toast quotes you can use). Find one that wraps the toast up nicely and leaves people feeling the warm and fuzzies.

It is essential to be aware of the things you need to do to deliver an excellent best man speech and things that you need to stay away from at all costs. There aren’t that many, but you better pay attention. You must understand that best man speech is a very popular source of entertainment for weddings today. The more suitable you can make the best man speech for the occasion, the better.

DON’T: Milk it and make it about you. Remember, it is about the bride and groom, not you. A great best man speech should be less than 7 minutes and should focus on the couple.

DO: Limit Anecdotes. If you do decide that an anecdote is worth relating – and some definitely are – make it the centerpiece of your speech, not one of several stories that get lost in the mix. Also, only use stories that are relatable to most people.

DO: Be funny, but not that funny. The best man gets to poke some fun at the groom, but remember, this is his day. Don’t destroy him in front of 200 people. Balance friendly digs with praise and well-wishes. A good best man speech is all about balance.

DON’T: Mention Ex Girlfriends. Yep, the second time we’re mentioning this one on the same page. There’s a reason. Stay away. If you can’t see why talking about your buddy’s exes on his wedding day might upset some people (not least the bride), then you’re an idiot.

DO: Compliment the bride. No making fun of the bride other than to point out her poor choice in companion as a husband. It is REALLY her day, so don’t mess with her. This is how best men go missing and get hurt badly.

DON’T: Swear . The language you and your buddies use when telling stories may be appropriate over beers at a BBQ, but not at a wedding. You’re addressing a lot of guests from a wide range of backgrounds and ages. This isn’t the time to push it when it comes to language.

DON’T: Read from a piece of paper the whole time. Practice your speech, learn it and get comfortable. Learning your speech may not be your idea of fun, but it will make all the difference in how the guests perceive you. Can’t remember the whole speech? Then work on the stuff that really makes a difference, the opening line and the closing toast.

DO: Go out with a bang . It is pretty easy to get the opening line right, but you need to be ready to go out hard as the speech ends. It’s your closing comments that people will remember the clearest. Speak up, stand tall and deliver that final toast with gusto.

DO: Choose a short and sweet story . Don’t tell 5-minute stories. If it can’t be said in less than 30 seconds, toss it out. Stories that require a lot of background (no matter how funny or relevant) just aren’t going to keep people’s attention.

Video Examples of Some Great Best Man Speeches

While researching best man speeches, a friend recommended we check out Youtube. Smart idea! We found loads of great best man speeches that were terrific examples of what to do. Everybody has their delivery and approach so keep that in mind.

One of the Funniest Best Man Wedding Speeches Ever!

We’re still laughing at this best man speech we found online. We are definitely stealing some lines from this one.

Our Favorite Best Man Speech Ever – Not Traditional!

The sheer creativity and uniqueness of this best man speech are worth watching. It is a long video but well worth it. This is how you get over 13 million views on YouTube!

How to Get a Standing Ovation

CJ Abeleda delivers a heart-warming, funny, and emotional best man speech for the groom of his only sister that culminates in tears, laughter, and a standing ovation.

It is rare that somebody unprepared can pull off an epic best man speech like this guy. I know I couldn’t do it if I wasn’t prepared, which is why this is super-impressive.

Hilarious Best Man Speech – Irish Guy at Italian Wedding

Matt Gunn gives a funny Best Man speech at his best friend Paul’s wedding. When I say Irish and Italian, I mean their heritage. Very funny.

IMAGES

  1. 30 Best Man Speech Examples, Tips & Structure 2024

    good one liners for best man speech

  2. 11+ Best Man Speech Examples

    good one liners for best man speech

  3. 30 Best Man Speech Examples, Tips & Structure 2024

    good one liners for best man speech

  4. Best Man Speeches

    good one liners for best man speech

  5. Best Man Speeches

    good one liners for best man speech

  6. Best Man Speeches

    good one liners for best man speech

VIDEO

  1. Hilarious One Liners That Will Make Your DAY

  2. Time We Act Like Republicans Again!

  3. #gk one liners best rivision //#all exam Me imported//#shorts #viralvideo #short #question

  4. Ai Funniest Baby Jokes Videos You Can't Miss

  5. Best man speech

  6. S1E01

COMMENTS

  1. The 50 Best Jokes For Your Best Man Speech

    As the best man, you're tasked with giving the toast—maybe the most famous one of the evening. For the big speech, it's important to have some jokes scattered throughout. The couple gets to be sentimental. Her father gets to be sad and nostalgic. You need to bring the funny like it's showtime at the Apollo. That's no easy task, either.

  2. 20 Unique Best Man Speech One Liners

    The Best Man is known for a few cheeky one liners. It's almost tradition. A good Best Man speech one liner or two adds a nice bit of flavour to your speech. I have listed out a few good ones that you can use. Feel free to tweak them to suit you best. Unique Best Man speech one liners 'An unmarried man is incomplete, a married man is ...

  3. 30 Brilliant Opening Lines for Your Best Mans Speech

    20. A best man is similar to a dead body at a funeral. You're expected to be there, but if you say too much, people start freaking out. 21. A wise man once told me that a best man speech is like a miniskirt. It should be short enough to be interesting, but long enough to cover the goods. 22.

  4. 42 Hilarious Best Man's Speech Jokes

    6) I just heard there was a competitive sweepstake on the length of the Best Man's speech. I put my money on 45 minutes, so settle in…. 7) My name is James and I am the Best Man. Many of you would beg to differ, but you'd do well to keep quiet - I know your secrets. 8) I'd like to congratulate the Groom on a truly magnificent speech.

  5. 45 Genuinely Funny Best Man Speech Jokes

    31. I heard there was a sweepstake on the length of the best man's speech. I just went for 40 minutes - so settle in. 32. Now, before I start, the hotel manger has asked me to request that, for reasons of health and safety, none of you get up on top of the chairs and tables during my standing ovation. 33.

  6. 30 Best Funny Opening Lines for Wedding Speeches

    16. "Hello everyone! I'm [Name]. I'm sure you all know me as (Name's best friend/sister/mum/dad), but if you don't, well done on sneaking into the wedding unnoticed!" 17. "Before I begin, I must explain that, this morning, [Name] asked me to remove anything resembling innuendo from my speech.

  7. 80 Hilarious Jokes for Best Man Speech (And How to Deliver Them

    So, Scott, here's my advice to you; as a married man, there are three phrases you must master: "Yes, dear," "I'm sorry" and "You're right.". Memorizing those words will save you a lot of heartache, Scott. Remember, marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband. 3.

  8. 25 Hilarious Best Man One-Liners to Spice Up Your Wedding Speech

    One-liners are a fantastic way to add a touch of comedy to your speech while keeping it light-hearted and entertaining. Whether you're looking to lighten the mood or simply bring a smile to the newlyweds' faces, we've compiled a list of 25 funny best man one-liners to help you steal the show at the wedding reception.

  9. 20 Genuinely Funny Jokes For The Best Man Speech

    Jokes about the best man. When it comes to the best man speech, guests will love a little self-deprecating humour. "A Best Man is like a dog. You love him, care about him, and he's only thrown up and ruined your upholstery twice.". "I recognise my place here; being best man at a wedding is like being the dead body at a funeral.

  10. 255 Hilarious Best Man Speech Jokes to Make Every Guest Laugh

    Loyal, caring, sincere, honest, and a great man. But enough about me! I'd like to offer a toast to the bride and groom. Then whip a piece of toast out of your breast pocket, hold it in their direction, and say you want them to have this. I did it as best man at a large wedding and it killed.".

  11. Top Best Man Speech Openers For Every Style

    Best Man Speech Openers. Step 1: Inhale helium balloon. Step 2: Give speech. "History really does have a way of repeating itself. X years ago, (bride's name)'s parents were sending her off to bed with a dummy. And today they're doing it all over again.". " (Bride's name), you're a truly special woman and you deserve a wonderful ...

  12. Best Man Speech Examples: 75 Funny and Sentimental Speeches

    Best Man Speech Example 3: The One-Liner Specialist. Hi everyone, I'm Patrick - Tom's best friend and the one who gets to spill all his most embarrassing secrets today! Just kidding, I would never do that… again. Tom and I have been through a lot together. From our first little league team, to being college roommates, to co-founding our ...

  13. Best Man's Speech

    Best Man One Liners. Here's a list of best man speech one liners that can be put in your best man speech. "I heard there is a sweepstake going on the length of the speech. I bid on 1 hour, so good luck!" "I'm a little bit nervous, but fortunately I received a few wise words in the build-up. I was told that talking to an audience is much like ...

  14. 51 Best Man jokes for a speech to win over any wedding crowd

    Thank God he married her before she found one.". "I've been asked by many how I'm going to cope with my best friend being married and spending all of his time loved up at home. I'm ...

  15. Best Man Speech Jokes and one liners

    I read somewhere that a best man speech shouldn't take any longer than it takes the groom to make love. So ladies and gentlemen - I give you Mr and Mrs Owen. (Take drink and sit down). Ladies and Gentlemen: you are all about to witness a unique event in history.

  16. Best Man Speech: How-To Guide, Examples, Tips & Jokes

    One-liners are sharp jokes delivered in one sentence. A good one-liner is concise and meaningful. It is instant but loaded with humor that can keep the guests laughing for a while. It is important that the best man speech jokes contain one-liners. Best Man Toasts Examples "It's been an emotional day, even the cake is in tiers."

  17. Best Man Speech Opening Lines: 70 Amazing Options

    Opening Lines for a Brother's Best Man Speech. Paying tribute to your brother with a best man speech is a memory you will both have for many years to come, so making it the best speech possible is essential. While brothers can definitely get away with poking fun at their sibling, just make sure your speech isn't just a roast; add a lot of toast-worthy elements too.

  18. 30 Brilliant Best Man Speech Opening Lines

    25. Making Love. This is a cheeky one, but not half as bad as some of the best man speech opening lines we've heard before! "I read somewhere that the perfect best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love. So please could everyone raise a glass to the happy couple!" 26.

  19. Best Man Speech Jokes And Tips To Write Speech

    Poke some funny best-man speech jokes at the groom. Readout messages and well wishes from the absent guests, if any. Close with a romantic, a poetic, a few famous lines, or a poem. Propose a toast; Good Jokes For Best Man: Etiquette Tips. While there are no specific rules for good best-man speech jokes, there are some unspoken practices to ...

  20. How To Write A Killer Best Man Speech (With Templates)

    A best man's speech traditionally takes place at the wedding reception after the maid of honor gives her speech. The best man's speech should be positive, respectful, and congratulatory. It can last 3 to 5 minutes and should focus on a central theme or story about the groom. Remember, a best man speech is not the time to "wing it."

  21. Best Man Speech Guide w/ Examples

    The best man speech format is pretty straightforward. The first part of the speech is geared towards getting guest attention. Ideally, the best man should have a great one-liner to open up the best man speech. See our best man one-liner examples for some inspiration. The next step is to introduce yourself personally and explain who you are to ...

  22. Best Man Speech: How to Write, Free Template, Examples & Tips

    6. Propose a toast. Finally, close out your best man speech with a heartfelt toast. Ask everyone to raise a glass and provide well wishes to the newly married couple. Steal this wedding toast: "Everyone, please join me in raising a glass to such a wonderful couple. I wish you a lifetime of peace, love and happiness.

  23. How To Write a Best Man Speech: Ultimate Guide With Tips

    The best man speech is one of the most anticipated speeches at a wedding reception. It is also one of the most nerve-wracking moments for the best man. This pressure can be alleviated by following a few simple tips. First, it is important to keep the speech short and sweet. The best man speech should be no more than 3-5 minutes long.