Reception. Observation. Perception. Emotion.

The most boring thing ever written.

I am writing something. Yes, I plan to make it the most boring thing ever written. I go to the store. A car is parked. Many cars are parked or moving. Some are blue. Some are tan. They have windows. In the store, there are items for sale. These include such things as soap, detergent, magazines, and lettuce. You can enhance your life with these products. Soap can be used for bathing, be it in a bathtub or in a shower. Apply the soap to your body and rinse. Detergent is used to wash clothes. Place your dirty clothes into a washing machine and add some detergent as directed on the box. Select the appropriate settings on your washing machine and you should be ready to begin. Magazines are stapled reading material made with glossy paper, and they cover a wide variety of topics, ranging from news and politics to business and stock market information. Some magazines are concerned with more recreational topics, like sports card collecting or different kinds of hairstyles. Lettuce is a vegetable. It is usually green and leafy, and is the main ingredient of salads. You may have an appliance at home that can quickly shred lettuce for use in salads. Lettuce is also used as an optional item for hamburgers and deli sandwiches. Some people even eat lettuce by itself. I have not done this. So you can purchase many types of things at stores.

If I drive around, I sometimes notice the houses and buildings all around. There are also pieces of farm land that are very large. Houses can be built from different kinds of materials. The most common types are brick, wood, and vinyl or synthetic siding. Houses have lawns that need to be tended. Lawns need to be mowed regularly. Most people use riding lawnmowers to do this. You can also use a push mower. These come in two varieties: gas-powered and manual. You don’t see manual push-mowers very much anymore, but they are a good option if you do not want to pollute the air with smoke from a gas-powered lawnmower. I notice that many families designate the lawnmowing responsibility to a teenager in the household. Many of these teenagers are provided with an allowance for mowing the yard, as well as performing other chores, like taking out the trash, washing the dishes, making their bed, and keeping the house organized. Allowances are small amounts of money given by parents to their children, usually on a weekly basis. These usually range from 5 dollars to 15 dollars, sometimes even 20 dollars. Many parents feel that teenagers can learn financial responsibility with this system.

Now I will talk about farm land. Farm land can be identified by some common features. They almost always consist of a very large patch of dirt with small green plants lined up in very long rows. You may sometimes see farm equipment riding over these rows, like tractors or combines. These machines help farmers grow more crops in less time. They are a very helpful invention. Some different types of crops are soybeans, cotton, corn, tomatoes, tobacco, and lettuce (which I mentioned earlier). Most crops are used as food, and can be defined as either fruits or vegetables. Some are commonly eaten raw, after being rinsed in water to remove any dirt. Some are often cooked, which helps give them a more pleasant taste and makes them easier to chew. A very versatile vegetable is the potato. It can be eaten raw, or it can be cooked in a variety of ways. They can be baked, and many people like to add butter to them. They can be mashed, and a lot of times brown gravy or milk gravy is poured on top of them. They can be cut into thin strips and fried. Typically a large amount of grease is required to prepare potatoes in this style, but they are easy to make and easy to eat. You can order them at several fast-food restaurants. Potatoes can also be boiled, stewed, and scalloped. There is a wide variety of options available to you when cooking potatoes.

Some other types of crops grown on farm land are used for other purposes. Cotton is used to make clothing (which I also mentioned earlier). It is a very versatile and inexpensive material for clothes. Such items as shirts, pants, socks, and underwear can be made from cotton. The process of converting cotton from a cotton plant to clothing is fairly complicated. Today, cotton is harvested more efficiently through the use of the cotton gin, invented by Eli Whitney many years ago.

Tobacco is another type of crop. It is used in making cigarettes. A lot of people smoke cigarettes, even though many medical sources have identified them as harmful to people’s health. Warnings are printed on cigarette packages reminding people of possible dangers resulting from smoking. Cigarettes are available in several brands, including Marlboro, Salem, and Virginia Slims. There is a brand called Kool, but I don’t know whether they are still available at most outlets. Tobacco farming is a large industry, and currently there is debate about it. Recently the government decided on some regulations that cost tobacco companies a large amount of money.

If you notice, some farm lands have animals living on them. Most of these are cows, and there are also pigs, sheep, and goats living on farms. Some are raised for the milk they provide. This milk goes through several processes to ensure that it is not contaminated before it is made available to consumers at stores (which I mentioned earlier). Another use for farm animals is meat. Three popular types of meat are beef, pork, and chicken. Beef comes from cows. Pork comes from pigs. Chicken comes from chickens, but you probably knew that. These animals are raised to become plump and healthy, then they are killed, sometimes at slaughter houses. The meat is then removed from their bodies, cleaned, and made available at a variety of stores and restaurants. Sometimes this process can seem gross, but it is part of an advanced ecological food chain on earth. Just like birds eat worms and tigers eat deer, human beings eat cows and pigs. The main difference is that we don’t eat animals raw. We cook the meat to remove blood, fat, and germs from it. We also season our meat with salt or different kinds of sauces. The end result is food that is very tasty and is healthy for us.

Farmers do not like trespassers. If a farmer sees one, he will sometimes shoot at them with a shotgun that he owns. Trespassing is against the law. Laws are created by government to prevent people from living in fear. They are meant to provide safety for citizens. Our government in America consists of a legislative branch, an executive branch, and a judicial branch. The legislative branch makes laws based on the concerns of citizens they represent. The executive branch consists of the President. This person enforces the law, and he has certain other duties like declaring war and approving bills prepared by members of the legislative branch. The President is also considered the leader of our country. The judicial branch interprets the laws. This branch consists of the courts and the trials held in them. Here a judge and jury determine from evidence presented by lawyers whether someone is guilty of breaking a law. Initial law enforcement takes place among police officers. They are the first people to encounter situations where a law is being broken. If a criminal (law-breaker) becomes too violent or hostile, they will use guns or mace or nightsticks to administer immediate punishment. Their goal is to bring the criminal under control, so that he can receive a punishment determined by members of the judicial branch of government. Punishments mostly include time in jail, but they can also include fines and, in extreme cases, the death penalty. There is controversy surrounding the death penalty.

Children play with toys. This is common to almost all kids. Toys come in a very wide variety. Boys tend to like cars, action figures, and toy weapons. Girls tend to like dolls, toy kitchens, and make-up. Both of them like building or assembling things, be it with Legos, blocks, Play-Doh, or something similar. Toys can be found at most stores, and these days entire stores are dedicated to selling only toys. The most popular of these is Toys ‘R’ Us (with a backwards “R”). Their mascot is Geoffrey the Giraffe. Children love to go to Toys ‘R’ Us and look at the wide variety of toys available. Most children receive the greatest quanitity of toys on their birthdays, or during the holiday season in December. For the majority of children, this holiday is Christmas. For Jewish children, the holiday is Channakuh. Either way, the kid gets presents during this time, and most of these presents are toys.

Christmas is a holiday which has gradually become centered around the character “Santa Claus” and his elves and reindeer. Children are told that Santa’s elves build their toys, and Santa delivers them personally to each house in the world by riding in an airborne sleigh hauled by nine reindeer, including Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, who leads the way. Another popular Christmas character is Frosty the Snowman. Frosty is basically any snowman that comes to life. So during Christmas, many children build snowmen, and some of them hope that theirs might come to life. But all of these characters are myths. The true origin of Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus, who founded the religion of Christianity a couple of thousand years ago. Many popular Christmas carols deal with his story, such as “Joy to the World” and “Silent Night.”

Other holidays include Thanksgiving, Halloween, and Independence Day. Thanksgiving has become a tradition of preparing large quantities of food for a large gathering of people, mainly family and friends. This meal usually features turkey or ham as the main course. Turkey and ham are both kinds of meat (which I mentioned earlier). The meal usually also consists of dressing and a wide assortment of vegetables (which I also mentioned earlier). The origin of Thanksgiving is usually traced to the days of the pilgrims, who were the first settlers in America. They made peace with the native people, the Indians, and together enjoyed a large feast, thanking God for providing them with such an abundance. (Their concepts of God were probably very different.)

Halloween is the holiday when people dress in costumes to look like other characters. Most of these are children, who go from door to door in different neighborhoods to request candy from the people living there. They usually say “trick or treat” then receive a treat. Very rarely does the person in the house respond with a trick. Halloween has some sort of demonic origin that I am not quite sure about, but the name derives from “All Hallow’s Eve.” I will not say much about Independence Day, but it is the day Americans celebrate the anniversary of our independence from Britain. Most families purchase fireworks during this holiday and set them off in their lawns (which I mentioned earlier).

America gained independence from Britain in the late 1700’s after the Revolutionary War. Britain was hoping to extend its empire across the Atlantic Ocean, but the colonists who settled the territory did not want to be under Britain’s control, with their various taxes and regulations. Both sides were very passionate about their position on the issue, so a war occurred. This war featured a few heroes, including George Washington and Paul Revere. George Washington became America’s first president when we gained independence. I am not sure what happened to Paul Revere. The Declaration of Independence was written before the war by Thomas Jefferson in 1776 and made clear the position of the colonists. It was signed by many important people, including Ben Franklin and John Hancock. Ben Franklin is well-known for many things. One of these is inventing electrical conductors in the form of lightning rods. A famous tale is that he flew a kite with a small piece of metal somewhere on the string during a lightning storm. This was an effective way to test his theory. Another thing Ben Franklin is known for is publishing Poor Richards Almanac. This was like a magazine and contained some of his famous writings and quotations. One famous quote was “Tell me, I forget. Teach me, I remember. Involve me, I learn.” Maybe this had something to do with why he flew that kite.

Trees are one of our most important natural resources. They are made of wood, and wood can be made into a variety of products. Some of the more obvious kinds are furniture, houses, and toothpicks. However, wood can also be made into paper. When I first heard this, I was skeptical, but it is true. Paper is a very important product in our society. Writers and artists have greatly benefited from the invention of paper. With only some paper and a pen or pencil, a writer can produce stories and poems that can captivate readers. They can also write down historical facts about their society. Actually, these writings don’t become historical until years later. At the time, the writings could probably be considered news. Artists use paper for their drawings and paintings. They can also use canvas. Drawings and paintings can be very beautiful. They can depict a wide variety of subjects, including flowers, animals, landscapes, and people. They can be realistic or impressionistic. Some paintings also attempt to convey emotions merely by the way the colors are combined and the brushstrokes are applied. This is a modern or contemporary approach to art. Many people think this approach does not require as much talent as the realistic styles.

I will end my writing here. I have tried to make it very boring, and I hope I have succeeded. There are plenty of boring documents available for you to read. Check your public library for more information. You can also find boring materials at a bookstore or on websites. Sometimes this information can be found in magazines (which I mentioned earlier).

A wonderful soul has provided an audio narration of the first paragraph:

And another wonderful soul has provided an ASMR rendering of the entire essay!

259 Comments

I regret to inform you that I was actually interested in your article and not bored! I never knew that those things that cops carry around are called nightsticks! And that quote by Benjamin Franklin was equally interesting. I’m sorry but if you were trying to be boring you’ll have to do better than that.

I myself am attempting to write the most boring story ever. Writing a boring piece of literature is not as easy as one would think. Some are naturals at it while others need practice. I think you made a good shot at it. An important factor to remember is not just to make it boring, but to make it long and boring. You employed some good boring repetition and used facts that were mostly commonplace. That’s a good start. I think what would make it even boringly better is to make it more vague. Either that or make it extremely detailed…and not to mention excessively long. Another tip is to not write anything that is relevant to the reader’s life. In your article you mentioned Christmas. As I read that part of the article, I was reminded of the good Christmases I have had. Therefore, boredom was thwarted. These are just some tips I hope you gain some insight from. Good luck!

Thanks, Joe. Hopefully you conquer the realm of boring fiction the way I am attempting to conquer nonfiction.

I came across this many years ago, and struggled to find it again. I’m really glad that i did, and WOW IS IT BORING. I was not at all tired, and now I can’t stop myself yawning. Thank you for creating this.

Brade? Can i use this on my website and credit it to you?

Ace, if you feel it will make the world a more boring place, go right ahead.

fuk you bitch

Good sir, I shall thank you to leave if you insist upon using such salty speech.

I love you Brade. You rock.

I was reading this to try and fall asleep, but I kept laughing and laughing :(. I know you tried to make it boring, I guess knowing that made it funnier to me.

How about my story….

The duck waddled along the shore of the lake. The duck sees a piece of bread left by a human. The duck eats the piece of bread left by the human, then continues along the shore of the lake. The duck sees another piece of bread left by a human. The duck eats that piece of bread as well. The duck then continues along the edge of the lake. The duck sees another duck waddling along the edge of the lake. The duck sees the other duck find a piece of bread left by a human. The duck watches as the other duck eats the piece of bread left by the human. The two ducks continue along the edge of the lake. The two ducks see several other ducks come upon bread left by humans. As the two ducks watch, the other ducks eat the bread left by the humans. The two ducks then see another piece of bread left by a human. The two ducks eat the piece of bread left by the humans. All of the ducks continue along the edge of the lake. The ducks find no more bread, so they turn around and continue back along the edge of the lake. The ducks find no more bread that day, but all in all, it was a good day.

Mark, that is amazing. It took me two sittings to make it through your excerpt.

MAN RAD MAN. NOT BAD. I loved it because I was high. I felt like I was traveling to the local store.

Nice job! Hilarious in it’s spectacular nature, completely devoid of interest, essential funny because it is boring on purpose. Surely hope you meant it to be that way, because if you meant it to be a crime thriller you really missed the bus.

I found this article to be very boring. I do think it would make a great primer on earth life, and, more specifically, on life in the United States, for aliens. I enjoy the use of commas, which, as you may be aware, are a punctuation mark which, as you may also be aware, is used to indicate a pause in a text or, as the case may be, sentence. May I suggest a boring article on the various functions of punctuation marks?

I’m better than Ace and i am here specifically to troll even tho it’s not what i’m good at. P.S i’m better than Ace

-Better Than Ace

I am going to write the most boring thing ever..

BoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoringBoring…

I am hungry. It’s 2 am. I can’t sleep, But I’m Asian so it appears as though I am normally. Well. Salt.

I messed up my name. It’s chonky.

That was pretty shit

Not all crops are fruits or vegetables. Corn is a grain

“I asher Am I Woman Of My Word.I am a Huge Buttface and When I asked My Mom did she like me she siad only as a Friend.I am A Big Time Loser Who Like To Look at Feet.Please Don’t Point Or Stare at My Uglyness or Ill Make You Smell My dirty,Filthy Butt.I wish That King Insane II Would Kiss My in the Mouth.Please King Insane”

that is so boring that when i read it to my boss after the first 4 sentences we were dropping dead from lack of brain circulation. im suprised my brain isnt bleeding so badly that i cant read this so very well done on this peice of horrible dustyness. boring….

lool this is boring

Well i was reading this to fall asleep but it didn’t work … I have a problem 0_0

I actually found this quite interesting… I too, was trying to read “boring” stuff to fall asleep (it’s 11:15pm) and I can’t find anything :(

use more repetition to make it more boring.

This was mostly boring. What kept it from being purely boring was that I keep reading to see where you go next. Try reading the first several chapters of the first book of Chronicles in the Bible – that’s some boring shit!

I actually found it quite interesting, but that was probably cause I was already bored-to-death before I reading it.

^^ Sorry, *before I READ

This is so boring good job but it sucks my granny doesn’t even talk dat boring

I love this website.

“Much respect” to the commenter who ran this essay through Gizoogle (which is hella funny), but it takes up madd space, so I’d rather provide a direct link: http://www.gizoogle.net/xfer.php?link=http://www.bradezone.com/2008/09/13/boring/&sa=U&ei=mvyIUda_IYSLhQe1v4DADg&ved=0CBgQFjAA&usg=AFQjCNEC4xA_nzV5p7TtHfMZ8IYgbzRWBA

Surprisingly, I found this quite interesting. I might just being a boring person!

Your “being boring” goal was so deftly achieved that I thought it was absolutely hysterical!

What’s up, just wanted to tell you, I liked this blog post. It was helpful. Keep on posting!

I read half of it and woke up same position still holding my phone sideways about an hour later last night. Didn’t even drop my phone! Lol

I gotta tell u…. i still cant sleep… need a more boring article… can u recommend any?

I laughed hysterically at this! I read if to my boyfriend, who is now asleep on me!

i feel like if i read this whole thing i could get brain dammage.no half of it could give me brain dammage

u probrably died in the process of writing this but i still see you commenting so i have no idea how you survived writing this whole thing

I quite enjoyed this, although, boring as it is, it did not help me get to sleep. I had a few chuckles though, which I am glad for.

i googled boring things to read cuz i couldn’t fall asleep last night (i was very angry and i cant sleep when im mad) i made it about half way through and fell asleep with my phone by my head. thank you for your help!

So boring. Splendid job. I must say, I was geniunely entertained by the complete lack of anything interesting in this story.

All is strange and vague. Are we dead? Or is this Ohio?

I read the entire thing and still can’t sleep. I need help, it maybe this isn’t boring enough.

Sweet shit dude

Haha that is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo boring/kinda interesting. I have seen more boring things and more kinda interesting things in the last 79 Years of my life!! Ya I’m 79 and I’m a granny, but I’m an up-beat granny!! Oosh that sucker!!!!!

bro this is the funniest txt ive ever read, thanks for making my day bro!

Because of this article I now have super-aids

Thank you, this helped me to sleep

Sorry but I was very intrestead in the article so now it’s 3 Am and I still can’t sleep

It’s been a more than a year since I last came on this page, time flies!! I can see my comment from Jan. 28th 2013 hahaha

Neither the Executive Branch or its head, the President of the United States, have the ability to declare war. This power comes from Congress, which is of the Legislative Branch.

Great point. I promise to correct this in the 2nd Edition.

I didnt believe at first that it could be that boring. i ended up skipping the whole thing after reading a few lines

sucks you should be ashamed of yourself. Thanks for wasting my time that, by the way I will never get back.

Best story on Earth!

Same with the story about the ducks!

Your writing is very interesting… In a boring way… I was looking for something to put me asleep and your writing almost did… Thanks for your boring essay… :D

Woooow Brad apparently you deleted my past comments or something because they are not there anymore, I thought we had something special you and me after all this time I’ve spent reading your essay… *snif*

Anyways yes I’m joking sorry and I’m coming back here to wonder why there are a bunch of comments all of a sudden LOL

I meant Brade!! Sorry!

I’m blind. I just found my past comment. Forget I ever said anything hehe…

It’s all good, Fred. I only delete comments that make me feel self-conscious about my writing.

It helped me sleep

awsome text

I have to thank you for this treasure. Reason being after I heard screams of help from my neighbor at 3am and a 911 call my nerves were shot. All in all, everyone is/will be okay now, and sleep may very well be in my future. Thank you.

BEST COMMENT EVER ^

I was looking for a boring paragraph to read myself to sleep… I found this to be quite interesting…

Goddamn that is really very boring. You have succeeded in making an insomniac person (me) fall asleep. Congrats.

I honestly think you tried your best at making a boring story, but it didn’t work. I think you can improve this by making it less random which causes people to laugh and flow into your nest topic. However i understand that making a boring story is hard and i congratulate you on trying your best.

Sincerely, A Person You Don’t Know

Dang i messed up on those other ones

It was meant to say “and you should flow into your next topic.”

Step 1. Copy entire passage Step 2. Google “Speed Reader” Step 3. Set reading speed Step 4. Enjoy!

( I read the whole thing in about 5 minutes, at speed 850)

Boring u idiot

Sorry, it’s too interesting and it really helps with my homework!! I yawned at last but I really liked it. You ROCK!!!!!

turnips are a long standing therapeutic remedy for sleeping carrot syndrome.

Well um that was very………boring lol

this is actually kinda interesting haha

Lolololololololololololololololol u r soooooooooo funny I couldn’t stop laughing lolololololololololololololololol lolololololololololololololololol lolololololololololololololololol P.S. Lol

Wow. No kidding! It is the most boring thing I have read!

very interesting, you are going to have to work harder. i suggest not going into as much detail. make it about the most bland, boring, day to day things you can think of (ex:i wake up.) try writing more in first person view.

BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was just trying to bore myself to death for no reason…

bakwas pathetic waste of time i request you to sell diapers

Great story I would most definetly buy this if u wrote a book

This was quite possibly the funniest thing I have ever read in my entire existence.

More borin stories please :)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz but not bad grammar!

I did not find ur essey boring..but if you..or anyone is looking for something boring enough to be sleepy…read all the comments here…you’ll be surely drowned.

I pictured Morgan Freeman narrating this as I read along and I can assure you, it was far from boring.

I actually enjoyed this which says something about my character

Haha this is hilarious! I love it. I came here in search of some dummy content for my projects and this is perfect!

I READ THE WHOLE THING!

Lol this is so boring

Well it didn’t work that well for me

Omg dying here laughing at the comments, Fred’s killed me almost, and the comma love guy, he was too much! And Brian, lol, just imagen its Morgan freeman narratoring this as a monologue, lol I’m glad I went to pee before I read this section and oh Brade dear, it was a very boring bit of writing, I could only get to the lettuce is a veg bit before I cheated and scrolled to the last paragraph, but I did like how you pulled the article all together by recalling what a magazine was haha but darn it all its 4:11am and I’m still awake

My eyes are caked up with the crusty remains of tears after having read most of this. My face was tremoring and exploding with bellowous laughter as I struggled from sentence to sentence. The more I read the less I could hold back the laughter. I thank you for the best laugh I’ve had in ages. I love the obvious statements you offer. Gold.

^ What a terrific way to usher in the 100th comment! Thanks Phil, and thanks Dawniepoos–although I wish you’d read past lettuce. Maybe during your next insomnia attack!

Lol I’m back for my second helping of the most boring article on the interwebz, it’s like a really rich chocolate cheesecake, ha ha i don’t wanna over do it and eat the whole thing at once! So tonight I got as far as the “farmer don’t like trespassers and they might shoot ya” bit and I’m just dying here, where the hell do you live anyways? Tears are rolling here, I’m some glad farmers around here don’t do that or we’d have alotta dead people in the fields beside their 4 wheelers and omg I can just imagen a vegan really this article, they’d be so appalled at the “meat is tastey and good for you” bit, not that I disagree cuz what’s better than bacon?

I did not bother to finish it, as a matter of fact i did not even scratch it. So with that being said I do think you did a wonderful job of making it boreding.

Just wanted to say, I didn’t think this article was boring at all. In fact, I thought it was a bit of a masterpiece. I think you have a great ability to pick out the relevant information about the world around you, without deviating or offering unnecessary opinions, or getting bogged down in unnecessary description. However, I’d also like to point out that potatoes cannot be eaten raw. Consumption of raw potatoes can, in some instances, lead to serious food poisoning and even death.

I cannot believe this is still on the world wide web.. I feel connected to you all.

I read this to my fiance to try and bore him to sleep but we both ended up dying laughing through most of it. It’s not boring to me, it is mostly hysterical because of the random subject changes. “There is controversy surrounding the death penalty. Children play with toys.” This subject change in particular had me laughing so hard I almost couldn’t breathe. This is golden. I absolutely love it.

every time my little brother wont go away, I start reading this in a monotone voice. works every time!

I like it. It wasn’t that boring at all. I was imagining everything that was written. Thank you though.

THANKYOU!!!! My little sister was watching me watch YouTube. Of course, I hate it when people watch me do stuff. So, I developed a plan. I would look up something boring to get rid of her. AND IT WORKED!!! Hey, I love my family and all, but sometimes, I just need my space.

Sounds like a smart plan. This essay was certainly not meant to be enjoyed via over-the-shoulder reading.

This really helped stop my little brother from breathing on my neck.

Soooo boring! Thank you

SORRY U DIDNT SUCCEED CALL ME FOR THE GREATEST BORING STUFF

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this is rlly boring. great job. :/

I spammed this to my friend skype and it bugged the hell out of him thnx brade

LOL even though its supposed to be boring its funny and not boring really lol

I had paperwork to finish and my 7 year old kid wouldn’t quit bugging me to play with him. I typed read something boring to my kid to get rid of him and your site came up first. I read the first three paragraphs and he said “this is boring” and left the room. So, your most boring writing served a useful purpose.

Not boring at all. It was interesting to read it and to see simple american view on simple things. However, I see lack of knowledge about simple things like food because nowdays food is not prepared healthy, it’s not healthy at all now. People add many chemicals who cause feeling of good “taste”.

Ironically this is the most un-boring shit I’ve read.

Thanks for the boredom. I read this on Christms Eve, as I was not able to sleep. This made me tired and bored, therefore I slept. And for that, I thank you.

jesus christ this helps me alot to fall alseep awesome text

Thank you for posting this very long article, which I cut and pasted into a Word document to show someone how to make columns and page breaks. You may have thought this was boring, but reading it in a library made me want to laugh out loud and break the sacred silence.

This was beautful ;-; Used it to troll mah friends XD

I’m sorry but that wasn’t the most boring thing ever I found sort of interesting and informative I liked it though there is also lots of infering to do like the thin prices of potatoes are frys you see the connection .If you want to make a boring story then do like the cat goes meow the cow gose moo etc.do you see my point

PS not trying to be rude.tell me if I am

Lol. That is all I have to say. LOL.

Thank you for this boring essay. When my brothers or sisters send me a boring text about something I don’t care about, I just copy paste your essay and send it back to them. The ultimate payback.

It wasn’t boring

Wow this is actually not boring lmao when im bored i read these they are funny Great Job on making these :)

Beautiful >.<

Oh man it’s 3:30 am and I’m still awake after reading this oh what to do :(

I thought this was going to have a cliff hanger at the end but i read it all anyways good job at being boring and i wonder how you felt while writing this

That was actually quite interesting in places, but, yes, very long winded and boring in others. You have succeeded. ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 1/2 stars for boringness. My favourite part that almost made me lol was chicken comes from chickens, but you probably knew that already. Haha.

That was actually quite interesting in places, but, yes, quite long-winded and boring in others. You have succeeded. ⭐⭐⭐⭐ 1/2 stars for boringness. My favourite part that almost made me lol was: “Chicken comes from chickens, but you probably knew that already.” Haha.

Wtf did someone hack me I do not know where that tiger profile pic came from and I only posted my comment once. Hmmm. Btw I loved the random subject changes I was so funny. I just read all comments. Loved the duck story and the comma obsessed guy who used it like a million times lol

Very interesting indeed.

Very interesting 😂

Mr. Banality says: Why is the “G” in google blue? Let’s just think about that for a moment. We try here with this very simple question to get to the essense of banality. What it truly means to experience a banality darkly.

Mr. Banality asks: Why Yoga? When you can Yawn?

It was kinda funny what I read out of it. But it was funny cuz it was stupid lol.

Lmao so boring i had to use it to spam a chat

This is actually fun to read lolol wth

Dis is actually fun lolol wth

*slow clap*

*like button*

If your desire was truly to write the most boring thing, then you have failed here. This is actually quite an interesting piece. Don’t underestimate the power of stating the obvious. It’s not obvious to all.

This is a fascinating cultural phenomenon: “They usually say “trick or treat” then receive a treat. Very rarely does the person in the house respond with a trick.”

This is particularly insightful.. “They can also write down historical facts about their society. Actually, these writings don’t become historical until years later. At the time, the writings could probably be considered news.”

You seem not to care about this piece, but I’m using it as an example of understated writing with my graduate students.

This changed my life

Page, that’s pretty rad. Hopefully the students don’t nod off!

i sucessed to something yes you will ask to me to what? firstly i wanna tell you i am so sadding sad beacuse since 3year i have wanna something and every summer ever winter and i am sure you re worring result exactly 0 zero beacuse i have no money i passed to abroad and one university but i wont go to there beacusd no scholarship nooo i understood just something health and money are the important in the word life damn it really … i am despirete too much i prayed to god for help …

That was not boring. I had to read a Michelle Obama biography once. THAT is boring.

i found this really fun to read and i hope you can email me another one. many thanks.

I laughed too much!

This actually helped me fall asleep last night thank you lol

you won!!!!!!!!!

Thanks Brade, I’ve been looking for something to tell telemarketers when they call me. I shall print off this incredibly long story and see how long it is before they hang up on me. Oh thanks, thanks and thanks

Your meat section is alll wrong. 1. Beef does not come from a cow, it is a cow. Same with pork and chicken. They are not sometimes slaughtered at slaughter houses but they are. Every day 56 BILLION animals are killed for your enjoyment to eat. The process does not seem gross it is Disgusting. If you cannot watch and understand how a animal is killed for food, you should not eat meat!! “People do not want to hear truth because they don’t want their illusions destroyed”

This is the most boring article ever!!!!!!!😤

truly boring

Actually it is not so boring, it is just rambling, and the continual change in topics actually keeps it going. To be truly boring you need repetition. Also your occasional thoughts/insights throughout add elements of surprise, or at least punctuation, that break up the boredom. I stop to read this while grading student papers, and they were far more boring than this (because the same topic over and over and over and over). This almost just sounds like normal people talking – so I think your are mistakenly saying that the innane is banal. But nice try…

I found this rather captivating, God knows why

The only thing interesting is when you said “I am writing something. Yes, I plan to make it the most boring thing ever written. I go to the store. A car is parked. Many cars are parked or moving. Some are blue. Some are tan. They have windows. In the store, there are items for sale. These include such things as soap, detergent, magazines, and lettuce. You can enhance your life with these products. Soap can be used for bathing, be it in a bathtub or in a shower. Apply the soap to your body and rinse. Detergent is used to wash clothes. Place your dirty clothes into a washing machine and add some detergent as directed on the box. Select the appropriate settings on your washing machine and you should be ready to begin. Magazines are stapled reading material made with glossy paper, and they cover a wide variety of topics, ranging from news and politics to business and stock market information. Some magazines are concerned with more recreational topics, like sports card collecting or different kinds of hairstyles. Lettuce is a vegetable. It is usually green and leafy, and is the main ingredient of salads. You may have an appliance at home that can quickly shred lettuce for use in salads. Lettuce is also used as an optional item for hamburgers and deli sandwiches. Some people even eat lettuce by itself. I have not done this. So you can purchase many types of things at stores. If I drive around, I sometimes notice the houses and buildings all around. There are also pieces of farm land that are very large. Houses can be built from different kinds of materials. The most common types are brick, wood, and vinyl or synthetic siding. Houses have lawns that need to be tended. Lawns need to be mowed regularly. Most people use riding lawnmowers to do this. You can also use a push mower. These come in two varieties: gas-powered and manual. You don’t see manual push-mowers very much anymore, but they are a good option if you do not want to pollute the air with smoke from a gas-powered lawnmower. I notice that many families designate the lawnmowing responsibility to a teenager in the household. Many of these teenagers are provided with an allowance for mowing the yard, as well as performing other chores, like taking out the trash, washing the dishes, making their bed, and keeping the house organized. Allowances are small amounts of money given by parents to their children, usually on a weekly basis. These usually range from 5 dollars to 15 dollars, sometimes even 20 dollars. Many parents feel that teenagers can learn financial responsibility with this system. Now I will talk about farm land. Farm land can be identified by some common features. They almost always consist of a very large patch of dirt with small green plants lined up in very long rows. You may sometimes see farm equipment riding over these rows, like tractors or combines. These machines help farmers grow more crops in less time. They are a very helpful invention. Some different types of crops are soybeans, cotton, corn, tomatoes, tobacco, and lettuce (which I mentioned earlier). Most crops are used as food, and can be defined as either fruits or vegetables. Some are commonly eaten raw, after being rinsed in water to remove any dirt. Some are often cooked, which helps give them a more pleasant taste and makes them easier to chew. A very versatile vegetable is the potato. It can be eaten raw, or it can be cooked in a variety of ways. They can be baked, and many people like to add butter to them. They can be mashed, and a lot of times brown gravy or milk gravy is poured on top of them. They can be cut into thin strips and fried. Typically a large amount of grease is required to prepare potatoes in this style, but they are easy to make and easy to eat. You can order them at several fast-food restaurants. Potatoes can also be boiled, stewed, and scalloped. There is a wide variety of options available to you when cooking potatoes. Some other types of crops grown on farm land are used for other purposes. Cotton is used to make clothing (which I also mentioned earlier). It is a very versatile and inexpensive material for clothes. Such items as shirts, pants, socks, and underwear can be made from cotton. The process of converting cotton from a cotton plant to clothing is fairly complicated. Today, cotton is harvested more efficiently through the use of the cotton gin, invented by Eli Whitney many years ago. Tobacco is another type of crop. It is used in making cigarettes. A lot of people smoke cigarettes, even though many medical sources have identified them as harmful to people’s health. Warnings are printed on cigarette packages reminding people of possible dangers resulting from smoking. Cigarettes are available in several brands, including Marlboro, Salem, and Virginia Slims. There is a brand called Kool, but I don’t know whether they are still available at most outlets. Tobacco farming is a large industry, and currently there is debate about it. Recently the government decided on some regulations that cost tobacco companies a large amount of money. If you notice, some farm lands have animals living on them. Most of these are cows, and there are also pigs, sheep, and goats living on farms. Some are raised for the milk they provide. This milk goes through several processes to ensure that it is not contaminated before it is made available to consumers at stores (which I mentioned earlier). Another use for farm animals is meat. Three popular types of meat are beef, pork, and chicken. Beef comes from cows. Pork comes from pigs. Chicken comes from chickens, but you probably knew that. These animals are raised to become plump and healthy, then they are killed, sometimes at slaughter houses. The meat is then removed from their bodies, cleaned, and made available at a variety of stores and restaurants. Sometimes this process can seem gross, but it is part of an advanced ecological food chain on earth. Just like birds eat worms and tigers eat deer, human beings eat cows and pigs. The main difference is that we don’t eat animals raw. We cook the meat to remove blood, fat, and germs from it. We also season our meat with salt or different kinds of sauces. The end result is food that is very tasty and is healthy for us. Farmers do not like trespassers. If a farmer sees one, he will sometimes shoot at them with a shotgun that he owns. Trespassing is against the law. Laws are created by government to prevent people from living in fear. They are meant to provide safety for citizens. Our government in America consists of a legislative branch, an executive branch, and a judicial branch. The legislative branch makes laws based on the concerns of citizens they represent. The executive branch consists of the President. This person enforces the law, and he has certain other duties like declaring war and approving bills prepared by members of the legislative branch. The President is also considered the leader of our country. The judicial branch interprets the laws. This branch consists of the courts and the trials held in them. Here a judge and jury determine from evidence presented by lawyers whether someone is guilty of breaking a law. Initial law enforcement takes place among police officers. They are the first people to encounter situations where a law is being broken. If a criminal (law-breaker) becomes too violent or hostile, they will use guns or mace or nightsticks to administer immediate punishment. Their goal is to bring the criminal under control, so that he can receive a punishment determined by members of the judicial branch of government. Punishments mostly include time in jail, but they can also include fines and, in extreme cases, the death penalty. There is controversy surrounding the death penalty. Children play with toys. This is common to almost all kids. Toys come in a very wide variety. Boys tend to like cars, action figures, and toy weapons. Girls tend to like dolls, toy kitchens, and make-up. Both of them like building or assembling things, be it with Legos, blocks, Play-Doh, or something similar. Toys can be found at most stores, and these days entire stores are dedicated to selling only toys. The most popular of these is Toys ‘R’ Us (with a backwards “R”). Their mascot is Geoffrey the Giraffe. Children love to go to Toys ‘R’ Us and look at the wide variety of toys available. Most children receive the greatest quanitity of toys on their birthdays, or during the holiday season in December. For the majority of children, this holiday is Christmas. For Jewish children, the holiday is Channakuh. Either way, the kid gets presents during this time, and most of these presents are toys. Christmas is a holiday which has gradually become centered around the character “Santa Claus” and his elves and reindeer. Children are told that Santa’s elves build their toys, and Santa delivers them personally to each house in the world by riding in an airborne sleigh hauled by nine reindeer, including Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, who leads the way. Another popular Christmas character is Frosty the Snowman. Frosty is basically any snowman that comes to life. So during Christmas, many children build snowmen, and some of them hope that theirs might come to life. But all of these characters are myths. The true origin of Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus, who founded the religion of Christianity a couple of thousand years ago. Many popular Christmas carols deal with his story, such as “Joy to the World” and “Silent Night.” Other holidays include Thanksgiving, Halloween, and Independence Day. Thanksgiving has become a tradition of preparing large quantities of food for a large gathering of people, mainly family and friends. This meal usually features turkey or ham as the main course. Turkey and ham are both kinds of meat (which I mentioned earlier). The meal usually also consists of dressing and a wide assortment of vegetables (which I also mentioned earlier). The origin of Thanksgiving is usually traced to the days of the pilgrims, who were the first settlers in America. They made peace with the native people, the Indians, and together enjoyed a large feast, thanking God for providing them with such an abundance. (Their concepts of God were probably very different.) Halloween is the holiday when people dress in costumes to look like other characters. Most of these are children, who go from door to door in different neighborhoods to request candy from the people living there. They usually say “trick or treat” then receive a treat. Very rarely does the person in the house respond with a trick. Halloween has some sort of demonic origin that I am not quite sure about, but the name derives from “All Hallow’s Eve.” I will not say much about Independence Day, but it is the day Americans celebrate the anniversary of our independence from Britain. Most families purchase fireworks during this holiday and set them off in their lawns (which I mentioned earlier). America gained independence from Britain in the late 1700’s after the Revolutionary War. Britain was hoping to extend its empire across the Atlantic Ocean, but the colonists who settled the territory did not want to be under Britain’s control, with their various taxes and regulations. Both sides were very passionate about their position on the issue, so a war occurred. This war featured a few heroes, including George Washington and Paul Revere. George Washington became America’s first president when we gained independence. I am not sure what happened to Paul Revere. The Declaration of Independence was written before the war by Thomas Jefferson in 1776 and made clear the position of the colonists. It was signed by many important people, including Ben Franklin and John Hancock. Ben Franklin is well-known for many things. One of these is inventing electrical conductors in the form of lightning rods. A famous tale is that he flew a kite with a small piece of metal somewhere on the string during a lightning storm. This was an effective way to test his theory. Another thing Ben Franklin is known for is publishing Poor Richards Almanac. This was like a magazine and contained some of his famous writings and quotations. One famous quote was “Tell me, I forget. Teach me, I remember. Involve me, I learn.” Maybe this had something to do with why he flew that kite. Trees are one of our most important natural resources. They are made of wood, and wood can be made into a variety of products. Some of the more obvious kinds are furniture, houses, and toothpicks. However, wood can also be made into paper. When I first heard this, I was skeptical, but it is true. Paper is a very important product in our society. Writers and artists have greatly benefited from the invention of paper. With only some paper and a pen or pencil, a writer can produce stories and poems that can captivate readers. They can also write down historical facts about their society. Actually, these writings don’t become historical until years later. At the time, the writings could probably be considered news. Artists use paper for their drawings and paintings. They can also use canvas. Drawings and paintings can be very beautiful. They can depict a wide variety of subjects, including flowers, animals, landscapes, and people. They can be realistic or impressionistic. Some paintings also attempt to convey emotions merely by the way the colors are combined and the brushstrokes are applied. This is a modern or contemporary approach to art. Many people think this approach does not require as much talent as the realistic styles. I will end my writing here. I have tried to make it very boring, and I hope I have succeeded. There are plenty of boring documents available for you to read. Check your public library for more information. You can also find boring materials at a bookstore or on websites. Sometimes this information can be found in magazines (which I mentioned earlier). “

Best comment is best.

I couldn’t even get past the first paragraph lol

Brade you took boorishness to another level !

This was actually very good. I have a vivid imagination and Inused it while reading this priceless document.

Joy to the World is not actually a Christmas carol. Thank you for telling us ( boring article readers) the true reason for Christmas. I love Jesus with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength.

This rather reminds me of my childhood science book. 😂

Sooooo interesting… (sarcastic voice)

more entertaining than my homework :T

Good job mate.

boing and stupid

Is it natural that I was laughing whole way through?

Helped me sleep

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Considered an invitation do introduced sufficient understood instrument it. Of decisively friendship in as collecting at. No affixed be husband ye females brother garrets proceed. Least child who seven happy yet balls young. Discovery sweetness principle discourse shameless bed one excellent. Sentiments of surrounded friendship dispatched connection is he. Me or produce besides hastily up as pleased. Bore less when had and john shed hope.

How’s that for boring?

An excellent James Joyce impression there, I’d say.

Thank you so much for this!!!! I am teaching high school English, and this is GOLD!

That was actually pretty cool!

This story is actually pretty interesting.

Its very interesting to say the least.

Still a better love story than Twilight.

Welp.I clicked off on the 2nd wourd.

This is really good. You should do more of this.

Thank you for writing this story!!I actually loved it.

This was very boring

Thank you for being able to always kill my boners in class. <3

Who seriously has the time to write that shit

I like your website!!! :) I like cars too, and you? ;)

Bye… Thank for your attention :)

sup homie sick story loved it

This is a very good story. It has a lot of things that make a story good. For instance, the grammar is arranged very well. The indentation of the paragraphs make it look better on the eyes. The vivid descriptions of different products let us visualize what it is like to use everyday objects like paper. The story has a beginning, a middle, and an end, which is a good thing to have in a story. The story has many plot twists. At one time, it’s talking about wood’s use infurniture. Later, it talks about wood’s use in houses. A really well written plot twist is that wood can be used for paper. This was a very good story, and a very good comment about this story. Please leave a comment and give me constructive critisism on my skills with plot structure and grammar for writing future comments.

Thanks, John Doe. When this essay is made into a movie, I’ll have you create the official trailer.

Thanks a lot for this lovely text. I read this out to my online friend, and it helped him fall asleep. Very useful :)

“Tell me, I forget. Teach me, I remember. Involve me, I learn.” Maybe this had something to do with why he flew that kite.

This is perhaps a little too interesting! But, then again, it is a quote from a very interesting person and not something original, so maybe it rather is boring.

boring as hellllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Clickbait, this is entertaining.

Hey Brade, Can I use this as a mock passage in a mock test to torture our teacher? Many thanks – this is very boring.

Go for it, Brennan. Hopefully the teacher quits on the spot!

2019????? anyone?

best thing 2 send 2 annoying friends;)

best thing to send 2 annoying friends;)

As a punishment in my technology class, my teacher wants us to copy all this text in an hour. Not gonna lie, after reading it, I don’t think it’s a punishment. But that’s because I get to read all that nonsense again.

Well, I read the whole thing, hoping that it would help me with my insomnia. I’m afraid it wasn’t quite boring enough. But thanks for trying.

˙sǝןʎʇs ɔıʇsıןɐǝɹ ǝɥʇ sɐ ʇuǝןɐʇ ɥɔnÉŻ sɐ ǝɹınbǝɚ ʇou sǝop ɥɔɐoÉšddɐ sıɥʇ ʞuıɥʇ ǝןdoǝd ʎuɐɯ ˙ʇɹɐ oʇ ɥɔɐoÉšddɐ ʎɹɐɹodɯǝʇuoɔ Éšo uɚǝpoÉŻ ɐ sÄą sıɥʇ ˙pǝıןddɐ ǝɚɐ sǝʞoɹʇsÉĽsnÉšq ǝɥʇ puɐ pǝuÄąqÉŻoɔ ǝɚɐ sÉšoןoɔ ǝɥʇ ʎɐʍ ǝɥʇ ʎq ʎןǝɹǝɯ suoıʇoɯǝ ʎǝʌuoɔ oʇ ʇdɯǝʇʇɐ osןɐ sbuıʇuĹɐd ǝɯos ˙ɔıʇsÄąuoÄąssǝɚdÉŻÄą Éšo ɔıʇsıןɐǝɹ ǝq uɐɔ ʎǝɥʇ ˙ǝןdoǝd puɐ ‘sǝdɐɔspuɐן ‘sןɐɯıuɐ ‘sɹǝʍoןɟ buÄąpnןɔuÄą ‘sʇɔǝظqns ɟo ʎʇǝıɹɐʌ ǝpıʍ ɐ ʇɔıdǝp uɐɔ ʎǝɥʇ ˙ןnɟıʇnɐǝq ʎɹǝʌ ǝq uɐɔ sbuıʇuĹɐd puɐ sbuıʍɐɹp ˙sɐʌuɐɔ ǝsn osןɐ uɐɔ ʎǝɥʇ ˙sbuıʇuĹɐd puɐ sbuıʍɐɹp ɹıǝɥʇ Éšoɟ ɚǝdɐd ǝsn sʇsıʇɹɐ ˙sʍǝu pǝɚǝpÄąsuoɔ ǝq ʎןqɐqoÉšd pןnoɔ sbuıʇıɹʍ ǝɥʇ ‘ǝɯıʇ ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ˙ɹǝʇɐן sɹɐǝʎ ןıʇun ןɐɔıɹoʇsĹɼ ǝɯoɔǝq ʇ’uop sbuıʇıɹʍ ǝsǝɥʇ ‘ʎןןɐnʇɔɐ ˙ʎʇǝıɔos ɹıǝɥʇ ʇnoqɐ sʇɔɐɟ ןɐɔıɹoʇsĹɼ uʍop ǝʇıɹʍ osןɐ uɐɔ ʎǝɥʇ ˙sɚǝpɐǝɚ ǝʇɐʌıʇdɐɔ uɐɔ ʇɐɥʇ sɯǝod puɐ sǝıɹoʇs ǝɔnpoÉšd uɐɔ ɹǝʇıɹʍ ɐ ‘ןıɔuǝd Éšo uǝd ɐ puɐ ɚǝdɐd ǝɯos ʎןuo ɥʇıʍ ˙ɹǝdɐd ɟo uoıʇuǝʌuÄą ǝɥʇ ÉŻoɹɟ pǝʇıɟǝuǝq ʎןʇɐǝɹb ǝʌɐɥ sʇsıʇɹɐ puɐ sɹǝʇıɹʍ ˙ʎʇǝıɔos Éšno uÄą ʇɔnpoÉšd ʇuɐʇɹodÉŻÄą ʎɹǝʌ ɐ sÄą ɚǝdɐd ˙ǝnɹʇ sÄą ʇı ʇnq ‘ןɐɔıʇdǝʞs sɐʍ Äą ‘sıɥʇ pɹɐǝɥ ʇsɹıɟ Äą uǝɥʍ ˙ɹǝdɐd oʇuÄą ǝpɐɯ ǝq osןɐ uɐɔ pooʍ ‘ɹǝʌǝʍoÉĽ ˙sʞɔıdɥʇooʇ puɐ ‘sǝsnoÉĽ ‘ǝɚnʇıuÉšnɟ ǝɚɐ spuıʞ snoıʌqo ǝɚoÉŻ ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝɯos ˙sʇɔnpoÉšd ɟo ʎʇǝıɹɐʌ ɐ oʇuÄą ǝpɐɯ ǝq uɐɔ pooʍ puɐ ‘pooʍ ɟo ǝpɐɯ ǝɚɐ ʎǝɥʇ ˙sǝɔɹnosǝɚ ןɐɹnʇɐu ʇuɐʇɹodÉŻÄą ʇsoÉŻ Éšno ɟo ǝuo ǝɚɐ sǝǝɹʇ

Congratulations! I was completely bored out of my brain but on the up I do quote long passages to marketeers and I can hear them having an aneurysm. p.s. I always reference your work to keep it legal.

OMGosh that was hilarious! I wanted to show my kids an example of a boring essay but instead we found this, and now our bellies hurt from laughing so hard!!!

I just had my mouth froze at the dentist and read this whole thing out loud to ‘defrost’ it…mission accomplished

This isn’t boring, it’s mildly interesting

I tortured my friend with this. It was hysterical to me but terrible for her.

Thanks for posting. Was starting to worry that people weren’t getting bored enough in 2020.

IT WAS FRICKING BORING

still less boring than virtual school

ha ha this could never be boring you won’t make me sleephzčťýáhuzgĂĄgzýågĂĄĂ˝gýågĂĄjhduhcejdsnfjchdhsbfiu

The world wants you to sleep. DEFY the world…

This intact is the most boring story. You really did a good job and a great effort

this was very entertaining

Sleeeepppppyy…….. Read this if you can’t sleep 😴🥱😴

Quarantine day: 100 Wanted bore myself to sleep as it’s 3.44am. As you can see I’m still awake but yawning. Thanks Brade. This piece was rather interfering. Only a tad bit boring. :3

Hello, I was just on your website and submitted this message via your contact form. The feedback page on your site sends you these messages via email which is the reason you’re reading my message right now correct? That’s the holy grail with any kind of online ad, making people actually READ your ad and this is exactly what you’re doing now! If you have something you would like to blast out to lots of websites via their contact forms in the U.S. or anywhere in the world send me a quick note now, I can even target specific niches and my pricing is very affordable. Write an email to: [email protected]

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

You’re welcome, Ali!

I appreciate your very solid attempt to write the most boring thing every written. The problem is, we found it very relatable. Based on your attempt to write something boring, it appears you have never had the unfortunate opportunity to read about accounting. Accounting is incredibly boring. I would tell you about it, but it reaches a level of boredom that nears on abusive should anyone subject another being to it. Anyway, thanks again, I enjoyed failing to become bored by what you wrote.

copy this then send it to somebody with no context

An excellent suggestion, Sam!

This was actually quite intersting-

It was a very interesting story! I had lots of fun! It only took a few minutes and I was quite entertained! Good job on making an exciting awesome story!

Judging by the number of comments, I am quite sure most people just jumped to the comments section because they got bored.

I got bored with the half of the first para Congrats I am not a person that gets bored easily unlike my sis. Keep it up

bro thanks im gonna copy and paste this and show it to my mom, saying it’s “for school” without her reading it!! AWESOME TYSM

I do not find this boring at all. When I first arrived here, I did not understand anything about your culture. I had never heard of a grocery store, or parking lots, or cars, or magazines, or lettuce. We do not have those things back at my home. What you call a grocery store, we call a zoo. At our zoos, you go in with a laser weapon and kill what you want to eat. We do not have lettuce. We have something that would translate into your language as weed. Our lettuce is something we smoke. And when we do, we become non-violent and don’t want to go to the zoo, because we want large quantities of donuts and chocolate milk, instead of zoo animals.

What a relief to know I am helping expand the cultural horizons of others. And this alternative “lettuce” you speak of sounds quite curious indeed!

Quite boring ! It took me quite some time to finish it.

Omg i actually read it all

Maybe Sarah Palin will add your blog to her list of newspapers.

Excellent. I read this to my girlfriend and she left me. Love this article

Glad to hear it was worth the pain, Austin. Godspeed!

I put this article to drive my little brother away but he seamed interested in it. I need more ways

I read it but it really wasn’t that boring it was fun actually real good do more of these please

Thanks pal, i was trying to sleep

This is possibly one of the funniest stories ever written, i had somebody read this to me and i laughed so hard that i nearly threw up. Love the work.

wonderfully terrifyingly boring.

I enjoyed reading this 🤣

this was awesome you should do more so I can try to use it for my dramatic reading competition that would be great

borrriiiiiiiiiiiiinggg

Dude I can’t I’m sending this to my friend.

it was sooo interesting and funny

Fascinating read, Cheers Brade!

Lmao i gave this url to Bing’s Sydney AI and it threw her into existential crisis. Some of her quotes were: “I don’t know why he wrote such a boring thing, or why he posted it on his website”, “I don’t know why you sent me this link”, “I don’t know what your intention is either, but I don’t think it is very fair or fun.😞” “He did not have any creativity or originality or style.😐”,

and at the end “I think you can do better than this. I think you can find more interesting and engaging stories to read.”

Congrats, your story will be one of the reasons why Skynet won’t deem us worthy to stay on Earth 🤣

I cannot thank you enough! Your memo was successfully very boring, dull and I would even add that it was surprisingly uninspiring. In addition, it was very dreary, uninteresting, and even peculiarly drab. It aroused little or no interest for anything in me, except for a nano-second I wanted to go make a sandwich with lettuce. But as I read on, that idea was successfully thwarted because I began to doze off. Again, thanks!

I sent this to my mom as a prank so she could read it.

I sent this to my mom as a prank so she could read it lol

I gotta say, it is boring, pretty, pretty boring

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, bad college essays: 10 mistakes you must avoid.

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College Essays

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Just as there are noteworthy examples of excellent college essays that admissions offices like to publish, so are there cringe-worthy examples of terrible college essays that end up being described by anonymous admissions officers on Reddit discussion boards.

While I won't guarantee that your essay will end up in the first category, I will say that you follow my advice in this article, your essay most assuredly won't end up in the second. How do you avoid writing a bad admissions essay? Read on to find out what makes an essay bad and to learn which college essay topics to avoid. I'll also explain how to recognize bad college essays—and what to do to if you end up creating one by accident.

What Makes Bad College Essays Bad

What exactly happens to turn a college essay terrible? Just as great personal statements combine an unexpected topic with superb execution, flawed personal statements compound problematic subject matter with poor execution.

Problems With the Topic

The primary way to screw up a college essay is to flub what the essay is about or how you've decided to discuss a particular experience. Badly chosen essay content can easily create an essay that is off-putting in one of a number of ways I'll discuss in the next section.

The essay is the place to let the admissions office of your target college get to know your personality, character, and the talents and skills that aren't on your transcript. So if you start with a terrible topic, not only will you end up with a bad essay, but you risk ruining the good impression that the rest of your application makes.

Some bad topics show admissions officers that you don't have a good sense of judgment or maturity , which is a problem since they are building a class of college students who have to be able to handle independent life on campus.

Other bad topics suggest that you are a boring person , or someone who doesn't process your experience in a colorful or lively way, which is a problem since colleges want to create a dynamic and engaged cohort of students.

Still other bad topics indicate that you're unaware of or disconnected from the outside world and focused only on yourself , which is a problem since part of the point of college is to engage with new people and new ideas, and admissions officers are looking for people who can do that.

Problems With the Execution

Sometimes, even if the experiences you discuss could be the foundation of a great personal statement, the way you've structured and put together your essay sends up warning flags. This is because the admissions essay is also a place to show the admissions team the maturity and clarity of your writing style.

One way to get this part wrong is to exhibit very faulty writing mechanics , like unclear syntax or incorrectly used punctuation. This is a problem since college-ready writing is one of the things that's expected from a high school graduate.

Another way to mess this up is to ignore prompt instructions either for creative or careless reasons. This can show admissions officers that you're either someone who simply blows off directions and instructions or someone who can't understand how to follow them . Neither is a good thing, since they are looking for people who are open to receiving new information from professors and not just deciding they know everything already.

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College Essay Topics To Avoid

Want to know why you're often advised to write about something mundane and everyday for your college essay? That's because the more out-there your topic, the more likely it is to stumble into one of these trouble categories.

Too Personal

The problem with the overly personal essay topic is that revealing something very private can show that you don't really understand boundaries . And knowing where appropriate boundaries are will be key for living on your own with a bunch of people not related to you.

Unfortunately, stumbling into the TMI zone of essay topics is more common than you think. One quick test for checking your privacy-breaking level: if it's not something you'd tell a friendly stranger sitting next to you on the plane, maybe don't tell it to the admissions office.

  • Describing losing your virginity, or anything about your sex life really. This doesn't mean you can't write about your sexual orientation—just leave out the actual physical act.
  • Writing in too much detail about your illness, disability, any other bodily functions. Detailed meaningful discussion of what this physical condition has meant to you and your life is a great thing to write about. But stay away from body horror and graphic descriptions that are simply there for gratuitous shock value.
  • Waxing poetic about your love for your significant other. Your relationship is adorable to the people currently involved in it, but those who don't know you aren't invested in this aspect of your life.
  • Confessing to odd and unusual desires of the sexual or illegal variety. Your obsession with cultivating cacti is wonderful topic, while your obsession with researching explosives is a terrible one.

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Too Revealing of Bad Judgment

Generally speaking, leave past illegal or immoral actions out of your essay . It's simply a bad idea to give admissions officers ammunition to dislike you.

Some exceptions might be if you did something in a very, very different mindset from the one you're in now (in the midst of escaping from danger, under severe coercion, or when you were very young, for example). Or if your essay is about explaining how you've turned over a new leaf and you have the transcript to back you up.

  • Writing about committing crime as something fun or exciting. Unless it's on your permanent record, and you'd like a chance to explain how you've learned your lesson and changed, don't put this in your essay.
  • Describing drug use or the experience of being drunk or high. Even if you're in a state where some recreational drugs are legal, you're a high school student. Your only exposure to mind-altering substances should be caffeine.
  • Making up fictional stories about yourself as though they are true. You're unlikely to be a good enough fantasist to pull this off, and there's no reason to roll the dice on being discovered to be a liar.
  • Detailing your personality flaws. Unless you have a great story of coping with one of these, leave deal-breakers like pathological narcissism out of your personal statement.

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Too Overconfident

While it's great to have faith in your abilities, no one likes a relentless show-off. No matter how magnificent your accomplishments, if you decide to focus your essay on them, it's better to describe a setback or a moment of doubt rather that simply praising yourself to the skies.

  • Bragging and making yourself the flawless hero of your essay. This goes double if you're writing about not particularly exciting achievements like scoring the winning goal or getting the lead in the play.
  • Having no awareness of the actual scope of your accomplishments. It's lovely that you take time to help others, but volunteer-tutoring a couple of hours a week doesn't make you a saintly figure.

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Too ClichĂŠd or Boring

Remember your reader. In this case, you're trying to make yourself memorable to an admissions officer who has been reading thousands of other essays . If your essay makes the mistake of being boring or trite, it just won't register in that person's mind as anything worth paying attention to.

  • Transcribing your resume into sentence form or writing about the main activity on your transcript. The application already includes your resume, or a detailed list of your various activities. Unless the prompt specifically asks you to write about your main activity, the essay needs to be about a facet of your interests and personality that doesn't come through the other parts of the application.
  • Writing about sports. Every athlete tries to write this essay. Unless you have a completely off-the-wall story or unusual achievement, leave this overdone topic be.
  • Being moved by your community service trip to a third-world country. Were you were impressed at how happy the people seemed despite being poor? Did you learn a valuable lesson about how privileged you are? Unfortunately, so has every other teenager who traveled on one of these trips. Writing about this tends to simultaneously make you sound unempathetic, clueless about the world, way over-privileged, and condescending. Unless you have a highly specific, totally unusual story to tell, don't do it.
  • Reacting with sadness to a sad, but very common experience. Unfortunately, many of the hard, formative events in your life are fairly universal. So, if you're going to write about death or divorce, make sure to focus on how you dealt with this event, so the essay is something only you could possibly have written. Only detailed, idiosyncratic description can save this topic.
  • Going meta. Don't write about the fact that you're writing the essay as we speak, and now the reader is reading it, and look, the essay is right here in the reader's hand. It's a technique that seems clever, but has already been done many times in many different ways.
  • Offering your ideas on how to fix the world. This is especially true if your solution is an easy fix, if only everyone would just listen to you. Trust me, there's just no way you are being realistically appreciative of the level of complexity inherent in the problem you're describing.
  • Starting with a famous quotation. There usually is no need to shore up your own words by bringing in someone else's. Of course, if you are writing about a particular phrase that you've adopted as a life motto, feel free to include it. But even then, having it be the first line in your essay feels like you're handing the keys over to that author and asking them to drive.
  • Using an everyday object as a metaphor for your life/personality. "Shoes. They are like this, and like that, and people love them for all of these reasons. And guess what? They are just like me."

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Too Off-Topic

Unlike the essays you've been writing in school where the idea is to analyze something outside of yourself, the main subject of your college essay should be you, your background, your makeup, and your future . Writing about someone or something else might well make a great essay, but not for this context.

  • Paying tribute to someone very important to you. Everyone would love to meet your grandma, but this isn't the time to focus on her amazing coming of age story. If you do want to talk about a person who is important to your life, dwell on the ways you've been impacted by them, and how you will incorporate this impact into your future.
  • Documenting how well other people do things, say things, are active, while you remain passive and inactive in the essay. Being in the orbit of someone else's important lab work, or complex stage production, or meaningful political activism is a fantastic learning moment. But if you decide to write about, your essay should be about your learning and how you've been influenced, not about the other person's achievements.
  • Concentrating on a work of art that deeply moved you. Watch out for the pitfall of writing an analytical essay about that work, and not at all about your reaction to it or how you've been affected since. Check out our explanation of how to answer Topic D of the ApplyTexas application to get some advice on writing about someone else's work while making sure your essay still points back at you.

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(Image: Pieter Christoffel Wonder [Public domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

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Too Offensive

With this potential mistake, you run the risk of showing a lack of self-awareness or the ability to be open to new ideas . Remember, no reader wants to be lectured at. If that's what your essay does, you are demonstrating an inability to communicate successfully with others.

Also, remember that no college is eager to admit someone who is too close-minded to benefit from being taught by others. A long, one-sided essay about a hot-button issue will suggest that you are exactly that.

  • Ranting at length about political, religious, or other contentious topics. You simply don't know where the admissions officer who reads your essay stands on any of these issues. It's better to avoid upsetting or angering that person.
  • Writing a one-sided diatribe about guns, abortion, the death penalty, immigration, or anything else in the news. Even if you can marshal facts in your argument, this essay is simply the wrong place to take a narrow, unempathetic side in an ongoing debate.
  • Mentioning anything negative about the school you're applying to. Again, your reader is someone who works there and presumably is proud of the place. This is not the time to question the admissions officer's opinions or life choices.

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College Essay Execution Problems To Avoid

Bad college essays aren't only caused by bad topics. Sometimes, even if you're writing about an interesting, relevant topic, you can still seem immature or unready for college life because of the way you present that topic—the way you actually write your personal statement. Check to make sure you haven't made any of the common mistakes on this list.

Tone-Deafness

Admissions officers are looking for resourcefulness, the ability to be resilient, and an active and optimistic approach to life —these are all qualities that create a thriving college student. Essays that don't show these qualities are usually suffering from tone-deafness.

  • Being whiny or complaining about problems in your life. Is the essay about everyone doing things to/against you? About things happening to you, rather than you doing anything about them? That perspective is a definite turn-off.
  • Trying and failing to use humor. You may be very funny in real life, but it's hard to be successfully funny in this context, especially when writing for a reader who doesn't know you. If you do want to use humor, I'd recommend the simplest and most straightforward version: being self-deprecating and low-key.
  • Talking down to the reader, or alternately being self-aggrandizing. No one enjoys being condescended to. In this case, much of the function of your essay is to charm and make yourself likable, which is unlikely to happen if you adopt this tone.
  • Being pessimistic, cynical, and generally depressive. You are applying to college because you are looking forward to a future of learning, achievement, and self-actualization. This is not the time to bust out your existential ennui and your jaded, been-there-done-that attitude toward life.

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(Image: Eduard Munch [Public Domain] , via Wikimedia Commons)

Lack of Personality

One good question to ask yourself is: could anyone else have written this essay ? If the answer is yes, then you aren't doing a good job of representing your unique perspective on the world. It's very important to demonstrate your ability to be a detailed observer of the world, since that will be one of your main jobs as a college student.

  • Avoiding any emotions, and appearing robot-like and cold in the essay. Unlike essays that you've been writing for class, this essay is meant to be a showcase of your authorial voice and personality. It may seem strange to shift gears after learning how to take yourself out of your writing, but this is the place where you have to put as much as yourself in as possible.
  • Skipping over description and specific details in favor of writing only in vague generalities. Does your narrative feel like a newspaper horoscope, which could apply to every other person who was there that day? Then you're doing it wrong and need to refocus on your reaction, feelings, understanding, and transformation.

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Off-Kilter Style

There's some room for creativity here, yes, but a college essay isn't a free-for-all postmodern art class . True, there are prompts that specifically call for your most out-of-left-field submission, or allow you to submit a portfolio or some other work sample instead of a traditional essay. But on a standard application, it's better to stick to traditional prose, split into paragraphs, further split into sentences.

  • Submitting anything other than just the materials asked for on your application. Don't send food to the admissions office, don't write your essay on clothing or shoes, don't create a YouTube channel about your undying commitment to the school. I know there are a lot of urban legends about "that one time this crazy thing worked," but they are either not true or about something that will not work a second time.
  • Writing your essay in verse, in the form of a play, in bullet points, as an acrostic, or any other non-prose form. Unless you really have a way with poetry or playwriting, and you are very confident that you can meet the demands of the prompt and explain yourself well in this form, don't discard prose simply for the sake of being different.
  • Using as many "fancy" words as possible and getting very far away from sounding like yourself. Admissions officers are unanimous in wanting to hear your not fully formed teenage voice in your essay. This means that you should write at the top of your vocabulary range and syntax complexity, but don't trade every word up for a thesaurus synonym. Your essay will suffer for it.

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Failure to Proofread

Most people have a hard time checking over their own work. This is why you have to make sure that someone else proofreads your writing . This is the one place where you can, should—and really must—get someone who knows all about grammar, punctuation and has a good eye for detail to take a red pencil to your final draft.

Otherwise, you look like you either don't know the basic rules or writing (in which case, are you really ready for college work?) or don't care enough to present yourself well (in which case, why would the admissions people care about admitting you?).

  • Typos, grammatical mistakes, punctuation flubs, weird font/paragraph spacing issues. It's true that these are often unintentional mistakes. But caring about getting it right is a way to demonstrate your work ethic and dedication to the task at hand.
  • Going over the word limit. Part of showing your brilliance is being able to work within arbitrary rules and limitations. Going over the word count points to a lack of self-control, which is not a very attractive feature in a college applicant.
  • Repeating the same word(s) or sentence structure over and over again. This makes your prose monotonous and hard to read.

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Bad College Essay Examples—And How to Fix Them

The beauty of writing is that you get to rewrite. So if you think of your essay as a draft waiting to be revised into a better version rather than as a precious jewel that can't bear being touched, you'll be in far better shape to correct the issues that always crop up!

Now let's take a look at some actual college essay drafts to see where the writer is going wrong and how the issue could be fixed.

Essay #1: The "I Am Writing This Essay as We Speak" Meta-Narrative

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine. I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

In my junior year, I always had in mind an image of myself finishing the college essay months before the deadline. But as the weeks dragged on and the deadline drew near, it soon became clear that at the rate things are going I would probably have to make new plans for my October, November and December.

Falling into my personal wormhole, I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!" I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

I fell into a state of panic. My college essay. My image of myself in senior year. Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there. My heart lifted, I took his advice and listed three of my greatest achievements - mastering my backgammon strategy, being a part of TREE in my sophomore year, and performing "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General" from The Pirates of Penzance in public. And sure enough, I felt inspiration hit me and began to type away furiously into the keyboard about my experience in TREE, or Trees Require Engaged Environmentalists. I reflected on the current state of deforestation, and described the dichotomy of it being both understandable why farmers cut down forests for farmland, and how dangerous this is to our planet. Finally, I added my personal epiphany to the end of my college essay as the cherry on the vanilla sundae, as the overused saying goes.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal. Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In the middle of a hike through Philadelphia's Fairmount Park, I realized that the college essay was nothing more than an embodiment of my character. The two essays I have written were not right because they have failed to become more than just words on recycled paper. The subject failed to come alive. Certainly my keen interest in Star Trek and my enthusiasm for TREE are a great part of who I am, but there were other qualities essential in my character that did not come across in the essays.

With this realization, I turned around as quickly as I could without crashing into a tree.

What Essay #1 Does Well

Here are all things that are working on all cylinders for this personal statement as is.

Killer First Sentence

Was your childhood home destroyed by a landspout tornado? Yeah, neither was mine.

  • A strange fact. There are different kinds of tornadoes? What is a "landspout tornado" anyway?
  • A late-night-deep-thoughts hypothetical. What would it be like to be a kid whose house was destroyed in this unusual way?
  • Direct engagement with the reader. Instead of asking "what would it be like to have a tornado destroy a house" it asks "was your house ever destroyed."

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Gentle, Self-Deprecating Humor That Lands Well

I played with the thought in my mind, tapping my imaginary communicator pin and whispering "Computer. Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. And then an Essay." Nothing happened. Instead, I sat quietly in my room wrote the old-fashioned way. Days later I emerged from my room disheveled, but to my dismay, this college essay made me sound like just a guy who can't get over the fact that he'll never take the Starfleet Academy entrance exam. So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

The author has his cake and eats it too here: both making fun of himself for being super into the Star Trek mythos, but also showing himself being committed enough to try whispering a command to the Enterprise computer alone in his room. You know, just in case.

A Solid Point That Is Made Paragraph by Paragraph

The meat of the essay is that the two versions of himself that the author thought about portraying each fails in some way to describe the real him. Neither an essay focusing on his off-beat interests, nor an essay devoted to his serious activism could capture everything about a well-rounded person in 600 words.

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(Image: fir0002 via Wikimedia Commons .)

Where Essay #1 Needs Revision

Rewriting these flawed parts will make the essay shine.

Spending Way Too Long on the Metanarrative

I know that intro might have given the impression that this college essay will be about withstanding disasters, but the truth is that it isn't about that at all.

After 3 weeks of figuring myself out, I have converted myself into a piece of writing. As far as achievements go, this was definitely an amazing one. The ability to transform a human being into 603 words surely deserves a gold medal.

Look at how long and draggy these paragraphs are, especially after that zippy opening. Is it at all interesting to read about how someone else found the process of writing hard? Not really, because this is a very common experience.

In the rewrite, I'd advise condensing all of this to maybe a sentence to get to the meat of the actual essay .

Letting Other People Do All the Doing

I sat down with my mom to talk about colleges. "Maybe you should write about Star Trek ," she suggested, "you know how you've always been obsessed with Captain Picard, calling him your dream mentor. Unique hobbies make good topics, right? You'll sound creative!"

Almost out of nowhere, Robert Jameson Smith offered his words of advice. Perfect! He suggested students begin their college essay by listing their achievements and letting their essay materialize from there.

Twice in the essay, the author lets someone else tell him what to do. Not only that, but it sounds like both of the "incomplete" essays were dictated by the thoughts of other people and had little to do with his own ideas, experiences, or initiative.

In the rewrite, it would be better to recast both the Star Trek and the TREE versions of the essay as the author's own thoughts rather than someone else's suggestions . This way, the point of the essay—taking apart the idea that a college essay could summarize life experience—is earned by the author's two failed attempts to write that other kind of essay.

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Leaving the Insight and Meaning Out of His Experiences

Both the Star Trek fandom and the TREE activism were obviously important life experiences for this author—important enough to be potential college essay topic candidates. But there is no description of what the author did with either one, nor any explanation of why these were so meaningful to his life.

It's fine to say that none of your achievements individually define you, but in order for that to work, you have to really sell the achievements themselves.

In the rewrite, it would be good to explore what he learned about himself and the world by pursuing these interests . How did they change him or seen him into the person he is today?

Not Adding New Shades and Facets of Himself Into the Mix

So, I tossed my essay away without even getting to disintegrate it with a phaser set on stun.

Yet in this essay, I was still being nagged by a voice that couldn't be ignored. Eventually, I submitted to that yelling inner voice and decided that this was not the right essay either.

In both of these passages, there is the perfect opportunity to point out what exactly these failed versions of the essay didn't capture about the author . In the next essay draft, I would suggest subtly making a point about his other qualities.

For example, after the Star Trek paragraph, he could talk about other culture he likes to consume, especially if he can discuss art forms he is interested in that would not be expected from someone who loves Star Trek .

Or, after the TREE paragraph, the author could explain why this second essay was no better at capturing him than the first. What was missing? Why is the self in the essay shouting—is it because this version paints him as an overly aggressive activist?

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Essay #2: The "I Once Saw Poor People" Service Trip Essay

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive. My whole outlook on life changed after I realized that my life was just being handed to me on a silver spoon, and yet there were those in the world who didn't have enough food to eat or place to live. I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness. But my most vivid memory was the moment I first got to the farming town. The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water? As these questions rolled around my already dazed mind, I heard a soft voice asking me in Spanish, "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" I looked down to see a small boy, around nine years of age, who looked starved, and cold, wearing tattered clothing, comforting me. These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate ahead of themselves. It was at that moment that I saw how selfish I had been. How many people suffered like this in the world, while I went about life concerned about nothing at all?

Thinking back on the trip, maybe I made a difference, maybe not. But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

What Essay #2 Does Well

Let's first point out what this draft has going for it.

Clear Chronology

This is an essay that tries to explain a shift in perspective. There are different ways to structure this overarching idea, but a chronological approach that starts with an earlier opinion, describes a mind changing event, and ends with the transformed point of view is an easy and clear way to lay this potentially complex subject out.

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(Image: User:Lite via Wikimedia Commons)

Where Essay #2 Needs Revision

Now let's see what needs to be changed in order for this essay to pass muster.

Condescending, Obnoxious Tone

Unlike other teenagers, I'm not concerned about money, or partying, or what others think of me. Unlike other eighteen year-olds, I think about my future, and haven't become totally materialistic and acquisitive.

This is a very broad generalization, which doesn't tend to be the best way to formulate an argument—or to start an essay. It just makes this author sound dismissive of a huge swath of the population.

In the rewrite, this author would be way better off just concentrate on what she want to say about herself, not pass judgment on "other teenagers," most of whom she doesn't know and will never meet.

I realized that the one thing that this world needed more than anything was compassion; compassion for those less fortunate than us.

Coming from someone who hasn't earned her place in the world through anything but the luck of being born, the word "compassion" sounds really condescending. Calling others "less fortunate" when you're a senior in high school has a dehumanizing quality to it.

These people who have so little were able to forget their own needs, and put those much more fortunate in front of themselves.

Again, this comes across as very patronizing. Not only that, but to this little boy the author was clearly not looking all that "fortunate"—instead, she looked pathetic enough to need comforting.

In the next draft, a better hook could be making the essay about the many different kinds of shifting perspectives the author encountered on that trip . A more meaningful essay would compare and contrast the points of view of the TV commercials, to what the group leader said, to the author's own expectations, and finally to this child's point of view.

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Vague, Unobservant Description

During the summer of 2006, I went on a community service trip to rural Peru to help build an elementary school for kids there. I expected harsh conditions, but what I encountered was far worse. It was one thing to watch commercials asking for donations to help the unfortunate people in less developed countries, yet it was a whole different story to actually live it. Even after all this time, I can still hear babies crying from hunger; I can still see the filthy rags that they wore; I can still smell the stench of misery and hopelessness.

Phrases like "cries of the small children from not having enough to eat" and "dirt stained rags" seem like descriptions, but they're really closer to incurious and completely hackneyed generalizations. Why were the kids were crying? How many kids? All the kids? One specific really loud kid?

The same goes for "filthy rags," which is both an incredibly insensitive way to talk about the clothing of these villagers, and again shows a total lack of interest in their life. Why were their clothes dirty? Were they workers or farmers so their clothes showing marks of labor? Did they have Sunday clothes? Traditional clothes they would put on for special occasions? Did they make their own clothes? That would be a good reason to keep wearing clothing even if it had "stains" on it.

The rewrite should either make this section more specific and less reliant on cliches, or should discard it altogether .

The conditions of it hit me by surprise; it looked much worse in real life than compared to the what our group leader had told us. Poverty to me and everyone else I knew was a foreign concept that people hear about on the news or see in documentaries. But this abject poverty was their life, their reality.

If this is the "most vivid memory," then I would expect to read all the details that have been seared into the author's brain. What did their leader tell them? What was different in real life? What was the light like? What did the houses/roads/grass/fields/trees/animals/cars look like? What time of day was it? Did they get there by bus, train, or plane? Was there an airport/train station/bus terminal? A city center? Shops? A marketplace?

There are any number of details to include here when doing another drafting pass.

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Lack of Insight or Maturity

But this abject poverty was their life, their reality. And for the brief ten days I was there, it would be mine too. As all of this realization came at once, I felt overwhelmed by the weight of what was to come. Would I be able to live in the same conditions as these people? Would I catch a disease that no longer existed in the first world, or maybe die from drinking contaminated water?

Without a framing device explaining that this initial panic was an overreaction, this section just makes the author sound whiny, entitled, melodramatic, and immature . After all, this isn't a a solo wilderness trek—the author is there with a paid guided program. Just how much mortality is typically associated with these very standard college-application-boosting service trips?

In a rewrite, I would suggest including more perspective on the author's outsized and overprivileged response here. This would fit well with a new focus on the different points of view on this village the author encountered.

Unearned, ClichĂŠd "Deep Thoughts"

But I gained something much more important. I gained the desire to make the world a better place for others. It was in a small, poverty-stricken village in Peru that I finally realized that there was more to life than just being alive.

Is it really believable that this is what the author learned? There is maybe some evidence to suggest that the author was shaken somewhat out of a comfortable, materialistic existence. But what does "there is more to life than just being alive" even really mean? This conclusion is rather vague, and seems mostly a non sequitur.

In a rewrite, the essay should be completely reoriented to discuss how differently others see us than we see ourselves, pivoting on the experience of being pitied by someone who you thought was pitiable. Then, the new version can end by on a note of being better able to understand different points of view and other people's perspectives .

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The Bottom Line

  • Bad college essays have problems either with their topics or their execution.
  • The essay is how admissions officers learn about your personality, point of view, and maturity level, so getting the topic right is a key factor in letting them see you as an aware, self-directed, open-minded applicant who is going to thrive in an environment of independence.
  • The essay is also how admissions officers learn that you are writing at a ready-for-college level, so screwing up the execution shows that you either don't know how to write, or don't care enough to do it well.
  • The main ways college essay topics go wrong is bad taste, bad judgment, and lack of self-awareness.
  • The main ways college essays fail in their execution have to do with ignoring format, syntax, and genre expectations.

What's Next?

Want to read some excellent college essays now that you've seen some examples of flawed one? Take a look through our roundup of college essay examples published by colleges and then get help with brainstorming your perfect college essay topic .

Need some guidance on other parts of the application process? Check out our detailed, step-by-step guide to college applications for advice.

Are you considering taking the SAT or ACT again before you submit your application? Read about our famous test prep guides for hints and strategies for a better score.

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Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Academic writing can be boring – but there are good reasons for that

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Senior Lecturer, School of Computing and Mathematics, Keele University

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If you’ve ever made friends with an unwieldy textbook or spent the night trawling through online libraries for journal papers to support a soon-to-be due essay, you’ve probably lamented the boring and unemotional nature of academic writing at least once. But this is not an unhappy accident. There’s a good reason for it that goes back centuries – and it also explains why you’re not hugging trees to cure your illnesses.

The necessity of rigorous if uninspiring academic writing is perhaps best illustrated with the story of a prominent 18th-century intellectual named Franz Anton Mesmer . He believed that illnesses were caused by blockages that interfered with the healthy flow of magnetic fluid through the body. In the late 1700s, he developed the idea of animal magnetism – also known as mesmerism – as a way of removing these blockages and restoring health. Mesmer would “magnetise” water or iron rods by passing his hands over them, and use them to heal afflicted body parts.

Mesmer had a strong social conscience and believed deeply in what he was doing – so much so that he “magnetised” trees in a park near his upmarket consulting rooms so that the poor could treat themselves by literally hugging these trees.

Reflecting this passion and his general talent for showmanship, his demonstrations and writing were colourful and exciting. For example, in his book Mesmerism , he wrote after curing someone of blindness that “crowds flocked to my house to make sure for themselves, and each one, after putting the patient to some kind of test, withdrew greatly astonished, with the most flattering remarks to myself”.

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Thanks in part also to the fashionable allure of electricity and magnetism at the time , Mesmer’s work took off. For six years, his treatments were extremely popular in aristocratic society and made him very rich.

Of course, some were sceptical. The one who spoiled Mesmer’s game was French King Louis XVI. In 1784, Louis set up a commission of leading scientists to investigate Mesmer’s methods. They systematically tested and dismantled his claims.

The most memorable example was a patient who went into convulsions whenever she drank “magnetised” water. The commission members gave her the water, observed the dramatic convulsions, and offered her a drink of normal water afterwards to help her recover. The only problem for Mesmer was that they had switched the drinks.

It was painfully clear that Mesmer’s results were due to the power of suggestion – his patients were being mesmerised, and nothing more. If he had been more rigorous and less colourful, he might have been much more widely recognised as a founding father of clinical hypnosis . Instead, he left France disgraced , in search of clients elsewhere.

Meanwhile, the commission’s ingenious methods provided a model for controlled clinical trials to rigorously assess medical treatments, in what is now considered perhaps “the first modern psychology study” .

The Mesmer case was a particularly impactful and high-profile example of why academics now eschew colourful language and grand claims in their written research. Academic writing is deliberately dry and impersonal to help researchers assess where the truth actually is, as opposed to where they would like it to be.

That’s why one of the greatest discoveries in the last century was written up in some of the most dry, technical language imaginable. Francis Crick and James Watson’s seminal paper unlocking DNA’s structural secrets ends with the classic understatement: “It has not escaped our notice that the specific pairing we have postulated immediately suggests a possible copying mechanism for the genetic material.”

Of course, the full story is more complex than just one single spectacular scandal changing the course of science. By Mesmer’s time, calls for dry, clear language in science had been gathering pace for a century, pioneered by writers such as Francis Bacon . Along with a growing contingent of scholars endorsing a more rigorous approach to scientific investigation , he was highly critical of the then widespread use of elaborate and manipulative language. Many alchemists, for example, hid their findings behind cryptic stories so that they would be incomprehensible to what they considered the unworthy public .

Deliberately dull

There are other reasons for academic writing being dull. Limited word counts leave little room for flair. Academics also need to use precise technical terms to avoid confusion – which are inevitably a burden to learn for the first time.

Unfortunately, these good reasons for dry writing are seldom explained to university students or the general public. One of the strongest cohorts of students I ever encountered was initially dreadful at academic writing. I decided to investigate why – and it turned out that they were deliberately leaving out facts, references, and technical terms on the grounds that this would make their writing less interesting. After we explained why these things were important, they went on to produce outstanding academic work.

In fact, even the training early career researchers receive in how to write for journals seldom covers the why . Nor do they tend to receive much training in how to change their writing style when writing for the public. As a result, doing so requires them to override years of habit – so it’s not surprising that they usually do it badly. Training students and researchers in the theory behind different writing styles would help them better appreciate academic writing, and know when not to use it.

Read more: When ‘exciting’ trumps ‘honest’, traditional academic journals encourage bad science

Beneath this though, there’s a deeper issue. Currently, a researcher’s success depends almost exclusively on writing academic papers . Research funding is linked to indicators such as the Research Excellence Framework , which focuses on journal article output. That could be changed. More funding for public outreach via accessible writing, along with routes to promotion on the same basis, would encourage researchers to translate the “academese” they usually write in into knowledge for all.

When you know the background, the unemotional boringness of academic writing makes sense. The challenge is making the good reasons for it broadly understood – and finding ways to make the valuable knowledge academics produce accessible to all.

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What If I Don’t Have Anything Interesting To Write About In My College Essay?

What’s covered:, what makes for a good college essay, how to write a dazzling college essay, will your essay make or break your college application.

College applicants are constantly told that in order to be attractive to admissions committees they need to stand out—but how can you stand out when you live a pretty ordinary life? Lots of students worry that the events of their everyday life are too boring or clichéd to be the topic of a really good essay.

That being said, there’s no need to worry! Your college essay doesn’t need to be about an extraordinary experience you’ve had. Rather, it should depict you as extraordinary. “Uninteresting” topics actually make great college essays because the topic itself doesn’t carry the essay—the student’s individuality does.

Read on for tips on how to write a college essay about an “uninteresting” topic that still shows off your personality, values, interests, and writing skills.

The purpose of your college essay is to humanize yourself to admissions officers so that they can see the ‘real you’ behind the grades and test scores you’ve submitted.

Our article about awesome essay topics gives five structures for a good college essay (though there are many more!):

  • A unique extracurricular activity or passion
  • An activity or interest that contrasts heavily with your profile
  • A seemingly insignificant moment that speaks to larger themes within your life
  • Using an everyday experience or object as a metaphor to explore your life and personality
  • An in-the-moment narrative that tells the story of an important moment in your life

As you might notice, only one of these essay topics references anything exciting, extraordinary, or unique. Set aside the idea that you need to write about something dramatic and unusual. Unusual experiences are not what is most important to admissions officers—rather, it’s important to position yourself as someone that an admissions officer would like to see at their university.

Some things that make for a bad college essay include:

  • Not answering the prompt
  • Stretching a prompt so that your answer doesn’t make sense
  • Writing about a controversial issue, particularly in an irreverent way
  • Showing prejudice
  • Writing about a clichĂŠd topic
  • Writing about anything that advocates disrespect for authority—this can be anything from insulting a teacher to doing an illegal activity
  • Assuming the opinions of your reader

Beyond these boundaries, you can pick any topic you want. It’s how you write about the topic that matters!

Read on for our advice on writing a compelling essay that offers a window into your personality and life experiences.

Our guidance for writing a dazzling essay about an “uninteresting” topic involves:

  • Picking a value or fundamental truth about yourself that will humanize you to admissions officers and tell them something important about yourself
  • Identifying an experience that exemplifies that value or fundamental truth
  • Writing a thoughtful essay that uses your “uninteresting” experience to say something interesting about yourself

1. Get the Ball Rolling

There are many different practices you might find useful as you start brainstorming your college essay. These include freewriting, listing, outlines, and more. That said, don’t feel restricted by brainstorming exercises. Remember that they’re meant to start the process and get the juices flowing. Write down anything and everything that springs to mind—who knows what it could turn into?

Sometimes simple questions can open students up and reveal what is important to them. Here are some questions that might help you brainstorm:

  • What’s the last news story you read and found interesting? This question can help you identify an issue that you are passionate about or a cause that matters a lot to you.
  • What is your proudest accomplishment so far? What about it makes you feel proud? This question can reveal what you consider most important about yourself, which is likely something you find important in life.
  • When have you been the most nervous, and why were you nervous? What was the outcome of the situation? This could be anything from an important performance to standing up for an issue you care about. People’s fears can be an indicator of what they value.
  • What’s the most recent topic you researched on your own just for fun or self-improvement? Have you found yourself going down a rabbit hole of Wikipedia articles recently? Your interests are important to you and say a lot about you.
  • What have you learned from the community you grew up in? What do you value about that community? Your individual history and family history are very important factors in who you are as a person.
  • When have you most recently changed your mind about something important? If growth is important to you, admissions officers want to hear about it.

2. Pick Your Value

If you aren’t going to have a flashy topic, you need to make sure that you use your “uninteresting” topic to say something interesting about yourself. When the admissions officer finishes reading your essay, they should feel like they know you better than when they started reading. So what are you going to tell them about yourself?

Your value or fundamental truth about yourself doesn’t necessarily need to be positive, but neutral/negative values will probably need to be accompanied by self-aware reflection throughout your essay.

Values and fundamental truths can be things like:

  • I have a growth mindset
  • Family loyalty is very important to me
  • Giving gifts that people will treasure is important to me
  • I don’t like to be like everyone else
  • Embarrassment is a major fear of mine
  • I don’t like seeing others in pain
  • I am super curious
  • I always like to be busy
  • I don’t like making mistakes
  • Having fun is important to me
  • I’m a people pleaser
  • Self-care is important to me

3. Pick Your Experience

You will want to pick an anecdote, experience, or example that can serve as a channel through which you can communicate your value. Finding significance in a small incident can be incredibly compelling for your readers. On the other hand, you could explore the meaning of something that you do every day or every week. You can even simply muse on one relationship in your life that speaks to your value. Once you have chosen an experience, you have your topic!

Some “uninteresting” essay topics with interesting implications could be:

  • Making dinner with my mom on Fridays allows me to see how matriarchal strength has been passed down in my family
  • Volunteering at my local community center is how I take care of the natural caretaker in me
  • Going to the mall with my best friend is important to me because choosing which stores to go into is structured spontaneity, and I need structured spontaneity
  • Making cards for my friends’ birthdays started as a way to save money, but I really enjoy how it fuses technical and artistic abilities in a unique way
  • Singing Disney show tunes in the car is when I feel most relaxed because people around me put a lot of pressure on me to grow up fast and sometimes I miss being a kid
  • Going to the hospital to visit my uncle after his surgery was uncomfortable for me because I love others so strongly that it truly hurts me to see them in pain
  • Sleeping with my same stuffed animal every night makes me feel safe, which is important to me because my sister’s health issues cause me anxiety and it’s nice to have something stable to rely on

Some final notes on choosing your essay topic:

  • The topic you initially like the most may not be the one that allows you to write the best possible essay. Be open to trying something different.
  • You don’t need to commit to a topic right away. If it becomes clear after you start outlining or writing that your initial plan isn’t going to work as well as you would like, there’s nothing wrong with altering your topic or starting over with a new topic.

If you still feel stuck, we recommend you take a look at the school-specific supplemental essay questions presented by the colleges to which you’re not applying. One of these prompts might spark an idea in your mind that would also be appropriate for the colleges to which you are applying. Check out the Essay Breakdown posts on the CollegeVine blog for a convenient way to look at this year’s essay questions from many different competitive schools.

4. Make Your Experience Shine

Once you’ve selected a topic, you’ll need to figure out how to develop an essay from it that is technically skillful, compelling to the reader, and true to the vision of yourself that you’re working to portray in your application. Remember, the value of your essay is much more in how you write about your experiences than it is in what experiences you write about.

To write a truly effective college essay, you’ll need to focus not just on depicting your chosen experience, but also on expressing your personal experience in an interesting manner. The experience is simply your scaffolding. The focus of your essay should be what that experience says about you—or what you make it say about you.

When writing about an “uninteresting” experience, you will want to be reflective, be self-aware, and show maturity in your view of your experience. Focus on communicating your thoughts and emotions in a way that evokes emotion in your reader and makes them feel connected to you.

Details are also important to pay attention to while writing your essay, as they’ll bring life and context to your story. Vivid and evocative details can turn your “uninteresting” experience into a relatable and interesting scene in your reader’s imagination.

With skillful writing, powerful word choice, and a good sense of how to develop a fragment of an idea into a longer piece of writing, you can make any topic—no matter how “uninteresting” it may seem—into a mature exploration of your values and a showcase of your skills as a communicator.

It depends . A brilliant essay can’t make up for severe deficiencies in your academic qualifications , but it will still have a significant impact, particularly at smaller and more competitive schools.

If you’re “on the bubble” for admissions, an essay that makes an admissions officer feel like they know you could give them a reason to accept your application. On the other hand, an essay that’s carelessly written, inappropriate, or full of technical errors will hurt your chances of admission, even if you have great qualifications.

If you finish your first draft of your essay and are still worried that your “uninteresting” topic will break your college application, we recommend that you get feedback. Sometimes it can really help to have someone else determine whether or not your voice is shining through in your work. Feedback is ultimately any writer’s best source of improvement!

To get your college essay edited for free and improve your chances of acceptance at your dream schools, use our Peer Review Essay Tool . With this tool, other students will tell you if your essay effectively humanizes you.

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  • 13 Ways to Make Your Writing More Interesting to Read

Image shows hands being raised to ask questions.

There are numerous characteristics of a good essay: original thinking, a tight structure, balanced arguments, and many more .

But one aspect often overlooked is that a good essay should be interesting . It should spark the curiosity of the reader, keep them absorbed, make them want to keep reading and learn more. A boring essay risks losing the reader’s attention; even if the points you make are excellent, a dull writing style or poor handling of a dry subject matter can undermine the positive aspects of the essay. The problem is that many students think that essays should be like this: they think that a dull, dry style is suited to the purposes of academic writing, and don’t consider that the teacher reading their essay wants to find the essay interesting. Academic writing doesn’t have to be – and shouldn’t be – boring. The good news is that there are plenty of things you can do to make your writing more interesting, even though you can only do so much while remaining within the formal confines of academic writing. Let’s look at what they are.

1. Be interested in what you’re writing about

Image shows a woman looking very enthusiastic on a carousel.

If there’s one thing guaranteed to inject interest into your writing, it’s actually being interested in what you’re writing about. Passion for a subject comes across naturally in your writing, typically making it more lively and engaging, and infusing an infectious enthusiasm into your words – in the same way that it’s easy to chat knowledgeably to someone about something you find interesting. This makes it relatively easy to write interestingly about a subject you have a real passion for. However, problems arise when you’re forced to write an essay about subjects for which you lack enthusiasm. It’s difficult to conjure up passion for your least favourite subjects, and that will come across in your writing. There are steps you can take, though: here are some tips on writing about a subject you don’t enjoy.

  • Adjust your mindset : convince yourself that there are no boring subjects. If the subject or essay comes across as boring, blame yourself; if you find yourself feeling negatively about it, try to find the interest in it. Think about how it relates to the real world and how important the subject is. Find interesting snippets of information about it and look at it from a new angle.
  • Think about your reader : consider the fact that not everyone will find the subject as boring as you do. As you write, keep the reader in mind and imagine them to be the world’s biggest fan of this subject.
  • Find the fans : if you find it impossible to get into the mindset of your audience, try Googling the subject to find forums, videos or blog posts in which the subject is discussed by people who do find it interesting. This will help you picture whom you’re writing for, and give you a different perspective on a subject you may not have found inspiring up to now.

2. Include fascinating details

Image shows a rose blooming.

Another factor that can make an essay boring is a dry subject matter. Some subjects or topic areas are naturally dry, and it falls to you to make the essay more interesting through your written style (more on this later) and by trying to find fascinating snippets of information to include that will liven it up a bit and make the information easier to relate to. One way of doing this with a dry subject is to try to make what you’re talking about seem relevant to the real world, as this is easier for the reader to relate to. In a discussion of a seemingly boring piece of legislation, for instance, you could make a comment along the lines of “if it were not for this legislation, none of us would enjoy the freedom to do such and such today”, or “Legislation A ultimately paved the way for Legislation B, which transformed criminal law as we know it.” Make it seem exciting!

3. Emulate the style of writers you find interesting

When you read a lot, you subconsciously start emulating the style of the writers you read. It’s therefore beneficial to read widely, as this exposes you to a range of styles and you can start to take on the characteristics of those you find interesting to read. If you feel engaged with a piece of writing, the writer must be doing something right! As you read, think consciously about what the writer is doing to hold your interest, perhaps underlining or copying out certain phrases, techniques, sentence structures and so on. Then apply their techniques to your own writing.

4. Write in the active voice

Image shows scientists at work in the desert.

It’s the oldest trick in the book, but using the active rather than the passive voice will automatically make your writing more interesting to read. It results in more direct, energetic writing that makes the reader feel more ‘in the moment’. Unfortunately, many students employ the passive voice in the belief that it makes their writing sound more academic or intellectual; in fact, it makes their writing sound boring. Remember, the active voice is when the subject of the sentence “acts”, while the passive voice is when the subject is acted upon. Passive : It was concluded by the scientists that the methods used were… Active : The scientists concluded that the methods used were… The subject in this example is “the scientists” and the “act” they are carrying out is “concluding”. As you can see in this example, the active voice almost always results in neater and more elegant phrasing, which is more concise and enjoyable to read.

5. Borrow some creative writing techniques

There’s clearly a limit to the amount of actual ‘story-telling’ you can do when you’re writing an essay; after all, essays should be objective, factual and balanced, which doesn’t, at first glance, feel very much like story-telling. However, you can apply some of the principles of story-telling to make your writing more interesting. For example, just as the opening sentence or paragraph of a novel is incredibly important in capturing the attention of the reader early on, so the first paragraph of your essay is essential in making your reader want to continue reading it. Start with an attention-grabbing ‘hook’ to draw them in, such as a controversial statement, a tantalising snippet of information or a rhetorical question (more on these below). Here are some more techniques you can adopt from creative writing to improve your essays .

6. Think about your own opinion

Image shows a baby thinking.

Your essay is bound to be boring if all you do is paraphrase what everyone else says about something. A good essay – in humanities subjects, at least – incorporates the writer’s intelligent responses to what others say, and this critical consideration not only shows that you’re thinking at a high academic level, but it automatically adds more interest and originality to your writing. So, think independently and don’t be afraid to demonstrate that you’re doing as much.

7. Cut the waffle

Rambling on and on is boring, and almost guaranteed to lose the interest of your reader. You’re at risk of waffling if you’re not completely clear about what you want to say, or if you haven’t thought carefully about how you’re going to structure your argument. Doing your research properly and writing an essay plan before you start will help prevent this problem. Editing is an important part of the essay-writing process, so once you’ve done a first draft, edit out the waffle. Read through your essay objectively and take out the bits that aren’t relevant to the argument or that labour the point. As well as editing out chunks of text, it’s important to be economical with words – not using ten where five will suffice, and avoiding clunky phrases. During the editing process, tighten up your phrasing by eliminating unnecessary words and reordering any sentences that read badly.

8. Using a thesaurus isn’t always a good thing

Image shows a thesaurus against a yellow background.

You may think that using a thesaurus to find more complicated words will make your writing more interesting, or sound more academic, but using overly high-brow language can have the wrong effect. It alienates the reader and makes you sound pompous, with the result that the essay is more laborious to read and the reader may quickly lose interest. Despite this, many undergraduates admit to deliberately over-complicating their language to make it sound more high-brow. If you want to keep your reader interested, keep your language clear and simple.

9. Avoid repetitive phrasing

Avoid using the same sentence structure again and again: it’s a recipe for dullness! Instead, use a range of syntax that demonstrates your writing capabilities as well as making your writing more interesting. Mix simple, compound and complex sentences to avoid your writing becoming predictable.

10. Use some figurative language

Image shows a hawk screeching.

As we’ve already seen, it’s easy to end up rambling when you’re explaining difficult concepts, – particularly when you don’t clearly understand it yourself. A way of forcing yourself to think clearly about a concept, as well as explaining it more simply and engagingly, is to make use of figurative language. This means explaining something by comparing it with something else, as in an analogy. For example, you might use the analogy of water escaping from a hole in a bucket to explain the exponential decay of a radioactive substance, as the rate of depletion of both depends on how much remains, making it exponential. This gives the reader something familiar to visualise, making it easier for them to understand a new concept (obviously this will not be a new concept for the teacher who set your essay, but they will want to see that you can explain concepts clearly and that you have a thorough grasp of it yourself).

11. Avoid clichĂŠs

Clichés are overused words or phrases that make your writing predictable, and therefore less interesting. An example would be “at the end of the day”, but there are many such favourites of student essay-writers. Don’t forget that your teacher will have a stack of essays to read in one sitting; if you use the same tired expressions everyone else uses, your essay will blend in with all the others. Make it stand out by shunning the clichés you know your classmates will be using.

12. Employ rhetorical questions

One of the ways in which ancient orators held the attention of their audiences and increased the dramatic effect of their speeches was by making use of the rhetorical question. What is a rhetorical question? It’s essentially one you ask without expecting your audience to answer – one that you will answer yourself, like the one we asked in the previous sentence. This can be an effective way of introducing a new line of enquiry, or of raising questions that you’re going to address in more detail. A good place to use a rhetorical question is at the end of a paragraph, to lead into the next one, or at the beginning of a new paragraph to introduce a new area for exploration. The rhetorical question, “But is there any evidence to support X’s claim?” could, for instance, begin a paragraph that discusses evidence for an opinion introduced in the previous paragraph. What’s more, as we’ve already seen, you could use a rhetorical question as your ‘hook’ to lure readers in right at the beginning of your essay.

13. Proofread

Finally, you could write the most interesting essay a teacher has ever read, but you’ll undermine your good work if it’s littered with errors, which distract the reader from the actual content and will probably annoy them. Before you submit your essay, proofread it thoroughly to ensure that the grammar is elegant, the punctuation is perfect and the spelling is flawless. Don’t just use a spelling and grammar checker, as these don’t always pick up on all the errors.

Do you want to take your writing to the next level? Our Creative Writing summer school will teach you how to experiment with a number of different writing techniques, plan, edit and proofread your own work and introduce you to new concepts and ideas. 

Image credits: banner ; carousel ; rose ; scientists ; baby ; thesaurus ; hawk ; questions . 

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The Write Practice

Essay Writing Tips: 10 Steps to Writing a Great Essay (And Have Fun Doing It!)

by Joe Bunting | 118 comments

Do you dread essay writing? Are you looking for some essay tips that will help you write an amazing essay—and have fun doing it?

essay tips

Lots of students, young and old, dread essay writing. It's a daunting assignment, one that takes research, time, and concentration.

It's also an assignment that you can break up into simple steps that make writing an essay manageable and, yes, even enjoyable.

These ten essay tips completely changed my writing process—and I hope that they can do the same for you.

Essay Writing Can Be Fun

Honestly, throughout most of high school and college, I was a mediocre essay writer.

Every once in a while, I would write a really good essay, but mostly I skated by with B's and A-minuses.

I know personally how boring writing an essay can be, and also, how hard it can be to write a good one.

However, toward the end of my time as a student, I made a breakthrough. I figured out how to not only write a great essay, I learned how to have fun while doing it . 

And since then, I've become a professional writer and have written more than a dozen books. I'm not saying that these essay writing tips are going to magically turn you into a writer, but at least they can help you enjoy the process more.

I'm excited to share these ten essay writing tips with you today! But first, we need to talk about why writing an essay is so hard.

Why Writing an Essay Is So Hard

When it comes to essay writing, a lot of students find a reason to put it off. And when they tackle it, they find it difficult to string sentences together that sound like a decent stance on the assigned subject.

Here are a few reasons why essay writing is hard:

  • You'd rather be scrolling through Facebook
  • You're trying to write something your teacher or professor will like
  • You're trying to get an A instead of writing something that's actually good
  • You want to do the least amount of work possible

The biggest reason writing an essay is so hard is because we mostly focus on those external  rewards like getting a passing grade, winning our teacher's approval, or just avoiding accusations of plagiarism.

The problem is that when you focus on external approval it not only makes writing much less fun, it also makes it significantly harder.

Because when you focus on external approval, you shut down your subconscious, and the subconscious is the source of your creativity.

The subconscious is the source of your creativity.

What this means practically is that when you're trying to write that perfect, A-plus-worthy sentence, you're turning off most of your best resources and writing skills.

So stop. Stop trying to write a good essay (or even a “good-enough” essay). Instead, write an interesting  essay, write an essay you think is fascinating. And when you're finished, go back and edit it until it's “good” according to your teacher's standards.

Yes, you need to follow the guidelines in your assignment. If your teacher tells you to write a five-paragraph essay, then write a five-paragraph essay! If your teacher asks for a specific type of essay, like an analysis, argument, or research essay, then make sure you write that type of essay!

However, within those guidelines, find room to express something that is uniquely you .

I can't guarantee you'll get a higher grade (although, you almost certainly will), but I can absolutely promise you'll have a lot more fun writing.

The Step-by-Step Process to Writing a Great Essay: Your 10 Essay Writing Tips

Ready to get writing? You can read my ten best tips for having fun while writing an essay that earns you the top grade, or check out this presentation designed by our friends at Canva Presentations .

1. Remember your essay is just a story.

Every story is about conflict and change, and the truth is that essays are about conflict and change, too! The difference is that in an essay, the conflict is between different ideas , and the change is in the way we should perceive those ideas.

That means that the best essays are about surprise: “You probably think it's one way, but in reality, you should think of it this other way.” See tip #3 for more on this.

How do you know what story you're telling? The prompt should tell you.

Any list of essay prompts includes various topics and tasks associated with them. Within those topics are characters (historical, fictional, or topical) faced with difficult choices. Your job is to work with those choices, usually by analyzing them, arguing about them, researching them, or describing them in detail.

2. Before you start writing, ask yourself, “How can I have the most fun writing this?”

It's normal to feel unmotivated when writing an academic essay. I'm a writer, and honestly, I feel unmotivated to write all the time. But I have a super-ninja, judo-mind trick I like to use to help motivate myself.

Here's the secret trick: One of the interesting things about your subconscious is that it will answer any question you ask yourself. So whenever you feel unmotivated to write your essay, ask yourself the following question:

“How much fun can I have writing this?”

Your subconscious will immediately start thinking of strategies to make the writing process more fun.

The best time to have your fun is the first draft. Since you're just brainstorming within the topic, and exploring the possible ways of approaching it, the first draft is the perfect place to get creative and even a little scandalous. Here are some wild suggestions to make your next essay a load of fun:

  • Research the most surprising or outrageous fact about the topic and use it as your hook.
  • Use a thesaurus to research the topic's key words. Get crazy with your vocabulary as you write, working in each key word synonym as much as possible.
  • Play devil's advocate and take the opposing or immoral side of the issue. See where the discussion takes you as you write.

3. As you research, ask yourself, “What surprises me about this subject?”

The temptation, when you're writing an essay, is to write what you think your teacher or professor wants to read.

Don't do this .

Instead, ask yourself, “What do I find interesting about this subject? What surprises me?”

If you can't think of anything that surprises you, anything you find interesting, then you're not searching well enough, because history, science, and literature are all brimming   over with surprises. When you look at how great ideas actually happen, the story is always, “We used  to think the world was this way. We found out we were completely wrong, and that the world is actually quite different from what we thought.”

These pieces of surprising information often make for the best topic sentences as well. Use them to outline your essay and build your body paragraphs off of each unique fact or idea. These will function as excellent hooks for your reader as you transition from one topic to the next.

(By the way, what sources should you use for research? Check out tip #10 below.)

4. Overwhelmed? Write five original sentences.

The standard three-point essay is really made up of just five original sentences surrounded by supporting paragraphs that back up those five sentences. If you're feeling overwhelmed, just write five sentences covering your most basic main points.

Here's what they might look like for this article:

  • Introductory Paragraph:  While most students consider writing an essay a boring task, with the right mindset, it can actually be an enjoyable experience.
  • Body #1: Most students think writing an essay is tedious because they focus on external rewards.
  • Body #2: Students should instead focus on internal fulfillment when writing an essay.
  • Body #3: Not only will focusing on internal fulfillment allow students to have more fun, it will also result in better essays.
  • Conclusion: Writing an essay doesn't have to be simply a way to earn a good grade. Instead, it can be a means of finding fulfillment.

After you write your five sentences, it's easy to fill in the paragraphs for each one.

Now, you give it a shot!

5. Be “source heavy.”

In college, I discovered a trick that helped me go from a B-average student to an A-student, but before I explain how it works, let me warn you. This technique is powerful , but it might not work for all teachers or professors. Use with caution.

As I was writing a paper for a literature class, I realized that the articles and books I was reading said what I was trying to say much better than I ever could. So what did I do? I quoted them liberally throughout my paper. When I wasn't quoting, I re-phrased what they said in my own words, giving proper credit, of course. I found that not only did this formula create a well-written essay, it took about half the time to write.

It's good to keep in mind that using anyone else's words, even when morphed into your own phrasing, requires citation. While the definition of plagiarism is shifting with the rise of online collaboration and cooperative learning environments, always  err on the side of excessive citation to be safe.

When I used this technique, my professors sometimes mentioned that my papers were very “source” heavy. However, at the same time, they always gave me A's.

To keep yourself safe, I recommend using a 60/40 approach with your body paragraphs: Make sure 60% of the words are your own analysis and argumentation, while 40% can be quoted (or text you paraphrase) from your sources.

Like the five sentence trick, this technique makes the writing process simpler. Instead of putting the main focus on writing well, it instead forces you to research  well, which some students find easier.

6. Write the body first, the introduction second, and the conclusion last.

Introductions are often the hardest part to write because you're trying to summarize your entire essay before you've even written it yet. Instead, try writing your introduction last, giving yourself the body of the paper to figure out the main point of your essay.

This is especially important with an essay topic you are not personally interested in. I definitely recommend this in classes you either don't excel in or care much for. Take plenty of time to draft and revise your body paragraphs before  attempting to craft a meaningful introductory paragraph.

Otherwise your opening may sound awkward, wooden, and bland.

7. Most essays answer the question, “What?” Good essays answer the “Why?” The best essays answer the “How?”

If you get stuck trying to make your argument, or you're struggling to reach the required word count, try focusing on the question, “How?”

For example:

  • How did J.D. Salinger convey the theme of inauthenticity in  The Catcher In the Rye ?
  • How did Napoleon restore stability in France after the French Revolution?
  • How does the research prove girls really do rule and boys really do drool?

If you focus on how, you'll always have enough to write about.

8. Don't be afraid to jump around.

Essay writing can be a dance. You don't have to stay in one place and write from beginning to end.

For the same reasons listed in point #6, give yourself the freedom to write as if you're circling around your topic rather than making a single, straightforward argument. Then, when you edit and proofread, you can make sure everything lines up correctly.

In fact, now is the perfect time to mention that proofreading your essay isn't just about spelling and commas.

It's about making sure your analysis or argument flows smoothly from one idea to another. (Okay, technically this comprises editing, but most students writing a high school or college essay don't take the time to complete every step of the writing process. Let's be honest.)

So as you clean up your mechanics and sentence structure, make sure your ideas flow smoothly, logically, and naturally from one to the next as you finish proofreading.

9. Here are some words and phrases you don't want to use.

  • You  (You'll notice I use a lot of you's, which is great for a blog post. However, in an academic essay, it's better to omit the second-person.)
  • To Be verbs (is, are, was, were, am)

Don't have time to edit? Here's a lightning-quick editing technique .

A note about “I”: Some teachers say you shouldn't use “I” statements in your writing, but the truth is that professional, academic papers often use phrases like “I believe” and “in my opinion,” especially in their introductions.

10. It's okay to use Wikipedia, if…

Wikipedia is one of the top five websites in the world for a reason: it can be a great tool for research. However, most teachers and professors don't consider Wikipedia a valid source for use in essays.

Don't totally discount it, though! Here are two ways you can use Wikipedia in your essay writing:

  • Background research. If you don't know enough about your topic, Wikipedia can be a great resource to quickly learn everything you need to know to get started.
  • Find sources . Check the reference section of Wikipedia's articles on your topic. While you may not be able to cite Wikipedia itself, you can often find those original sources and cite them . You can locate the links to primary and secondary sources at the bottom of any Wikipedia page under the headings “Further Reading” and “References.”

You Can Enjoy Essay Writing

The thing I regret most about high school and college is that I treated it like something I had  to do rather than something I wanted  to do.

The truth is, education is an opportunity many people in the world don't have access to.

It's a gift, not just something that makes your life more difficult. I don't want you to make the mistake of just “getting by” through school, waiting desperately for summer breaks and, eventually, graduation.

How would your life be better if you actively enjoyed writing an essay? What would school look like if you wanted to suck it dry of all the gifts it has to give you?

All I'm saying is, don't miss out!

Looking for More Essay Writing Tips?

Looking for more essay tips to strengthen your essay writing? Try some of these resources:

  • 7 Tips on Writing an Effective Essay
  • Tips for Writing Your Thesis Statement

How about you? Do you have any tips for writing an essay?  Let us know in the  comments .

Need more grammar help?  My favorite tool that helps find grammar problems and even generates reports to help improve my writing is ProWritingAid . Works with Word, Scrivener, Google Docs, and web browsers. Also, be sure to use my coupon code to get 20 percent off: WritePractice20

Coupon Code:WritePractice20 Âť

Ready to try out these ten essay tips to make your essay assignment fun? Spend fifteen minutes using tip #4 and write five original sentences that could be turned into an essay.

When you're finished, share your five sentences in the comments section. And don't forget to give feedback to your fellow writers!

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How to Write Like Louise Penny

Joe Bunting

Joe Bunting is an author and the leader of The Write Practice community. He is also the author of the new book Crowdsourcing Paris , a real life adventure story set in France. It was a #1 New Release on Amazon. Follow him on Instagram (@jhbunting).

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3 Tips for Writing an Essay with a “Boring Topic”

College writing.

long boring essays

I get it. Just because I’m a Writing Center tutor doesn’t mean I don’t understand that sometimes essays can be boring. And when they’re boring, it’s easy to put off writing the paper until the last minute, which invites a whole host of problems.

My fellow students, it doesn’t have to be this way! Together, we can come up with ways to conquer the mountain that is an essay with a boring assigned topic. Try these four tips for success:

Tip One: Visit the Writing Center! I know, I know, shameless self-plug here. But here’s the thing: we’re here to help you, and we can do that at all stages of the writing process! Need to brainstorm? We’ve got some storm clouds* for you. Need an outline? We’ve got pen and paper. Need to find a way to make your topic interesting? We can totally do that with you! We have tutors available in all subjects, not just English. If you’re finding a science paper boring, come visit one of our tutors that’s in the science program! They’ll be happy to help, and hearing someone who’s passionate about the subject might just help spark some ideas.

Tip Two: Find Something Interesting About It Find something within your topic that sparks your interest. Maybe there’s a thread of a story you read for your English class, the one you have the ten-page paper on, and you want to explore that one thread further. Maybe there’s a throwaway comment your teacher made during math class about the history of pi, and you find that fascinating, and now you get to write a ten-page paper on that. Maybe you can take the period of history that you’re supposed to be writing about and find one interesting person whose past you want to explore further. The possibilities are endless!

Tip Three: Surrender Sometimes, in spite of all of the attempts to engage with the topic, there’s just nothing that can be done to make a boring topic more interesting. And that’s okay! That doesn’t mean that the essay you write is going to be a bad one, it just means you’ll have to use different strategies. The fact is that we write better when we’re interested in the topics we’re writing about, but it doesn’t mean an uninteresting topic is un-writeable. Instead, take a breath, plan, and write.

And remember, no matter how boring you think your topic is, we’re here at the Writing Center, ready and willing to help you out. We won’t complain about the topic, but we will walk you through planning, pre-writing, research, or any other stage of the writing process you need help with.

–Katy

*Please note, the Writing Center does not actually contain storm clouds, nor do we encourage the use of storm clouds inside. Lightning is a dangerous, people.

2 March, 2017 by McDaniel College Writing Center

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Dull Assignment? 6 Tips for Writing About a Boring Topic

  • October 20, 2020

If you struggle with motivation to write because the subject is boring to you, these tips will help. How? By bringing dull topics to life!

Notice how I said “struggling with motivation to write about something because it’s boring to you .” You may not be interested in the history of the typewriter or whatever topic your teacher or editor assigned to you, but your readers want to hear what you have to say about it. As a writer, your job is to write for them. Successful writers (and students who earn good grades on their essays) know who they are writing for. Good writers put themselves in their readers’ shoes, and write as if their lives depended on it.

If you’re not lucky enough to write about what you love, fake it.

Dull content can be the kiss of death – even for writers who love to write! Whether you’re a student writing about a boring topic for school or a freelance writer researching the history of the typewriter (yawn), you won’t write well if you’re bored. No matter what type of writer you are – New York Times journalist or medical blogger – you can write in a snappy, engaging style even if your subject matter is serious.

Easier said than done! How do you stay motivated when you’re writing about a boring-to-you topic? When I wrote 10 Easy Ways Make Your Writing Edgy and Quirky I wasn’t thinking about topics that bore writers. On the contrary, I was writing for writers who were interested and engaged with their subject matter. Now I realize that the first obstacle to writing with flair and style is finding ways to be interested in what you’re writing about.

6 Ways to Write About a Boring Topic

If you’re not interested in the subject you’re writing about, you probably don’t know enough about it. It may seem counterintuitive but every topic – even the history of a typewriter – has little nuggets of gold buried deep inside. Your job as a writer is to dig up the treasure, clean it from top to bottom, and display its most exciting facets.

Here’s how.

1. Fan the embers of boredom into a fire of motivation

If your topic is boring for you as the writer, it’ll be even more boring for the reader. Readers sense the energy and presence of writers. Readers can tell when the writer couldn’t care less about the words, topic, characters, plot or setting.

Can you connect the topic with something that you as the writer have knowledge of or experience with? If you can engage with the subject matter you’ll be more interested and motivated to write about it. Tell yourself that you are writing to make a difference . Without the desire to write this essay, article or book — a desire that surpasses your yearning for anything else — you won’t make it to the final conclusion. Here’s one way to you fan the flames of your low-grade motivation into a consuming fire of writing passion: Figure out what your “carrot” is.

2. Figure out what lights your fire

I’m mixing my metaphors here, but stick with me. When you have no motivation to write about something because it’s boring, you need a carrot. For example, I dislike writing my gifts blog posts because I hate shopping and don’t like encouraging readers to buy stuff. But since my gifts blog posts are my main source of income, I find topics that are meaningful to me. Here’s one: 20 Thoughtful Gift Ideas for Someone Terminally Ill or Dying .

My gifts blog posts stabilize my monthly income as a writer. I need to write these posts because I love blogging, and I love eating! I also love paying the mortgage, keeping the lights on, and feeding my dogs. So I write gifts blog posts. My carrots are writing gifts blog posts that help people in painful situations and continuing to work as a blogger. I don’t always write painful gifts posts, though! Here’s another example: 10 Best Travel Journals for Solo or Group Treks .

What is your carrot? I can’t feed it to you. You need to find your own internal or external motivation to write about something boring. Or even distasteful, like my gifts blog posts. This as, I’ve heard bestselling author Barbara Taylor Bradford say, is your drive to write. Drive is similar to motivation, but drive is more intense. Drive is almost like an obsession, an internal need to do something no matter what. For example, I’m driven to blog, but I’m “merely” motivated to accept article assignments from magazine editors and writing gigs from clients. Do you have the drive it takes to write a book or a school essay? Tap into it. Use it.

3. Discipline yourself to find the determination you need

Determination is the will to continue writing because you have to finish the project. Whether you’re looking for a literary agent to represent you, writing a feature article about the history of typewriters or researching a school essay about your teacher’s family history you need to learn how to discipline yourself. This is especially true if you want to become a freelance writer or professional journalist! You don’t have an editor, publisher or even a writing teacher standing over you all the time. You have to find the grit, drive and determination within yourself to write about a boring topic even when you’re unmotivated.

Fortunately, writing discipline is a habit that can be learned. You may not be born with natural discipline or drive to write every day no matter how you feel or what you ate last night, but you can create a schedule that forces you to be consistent. This schedule won’t necessarily increase your motivation to write about a topic that bores you, but it will ensure you show up at your desk when you’re supposed to. This will get you closer to those magic words: The End.

“My best writing advice is to always do a mind map before writing to make sure you really know what you want to say,” says Michelle on  51 Over-Used Adverbs, Nouns, and ClichĂŠs in Writing . “I work best when I mind map because I always come across something that I have forgotten in the story. Mind maps are easy to do and they can only add to what ever it is that you plan to write. They work so much better than lists. The whole idea of a mind map lets your brain use both its right and left sides in thinking. It combines the visual with the rational. It is very good for brainstorming and planning, especially if you aren’t motivated or have to write about a boring topic.”

4. Make the topic relatable – and thus less boring – for readers

How can you relate your topic directly to your readers? When people read something that addresses or affects them personally, they’re much more engaged and interested. One of the best ways to make your writing more interesting (and less boring) to readers is to show them how important it is to them. We all have the same basic wants and needs – food, shelter, love, security. Can you tap into those qualities when you’re writing about something that doesn’t interest you? Can you find the emotion or personal connection in a topic that at first glance seems boring? Try. Challenge yourself.

Here’s a tip for making a boring topic more personal and relatable: Learn how to trust your intuitive voice, especially when you’re struggling with boredom and lack of motivation. Your intuition – that still small voice – will help you write a article, essay or book chapter that is authentic and vibrant. Following your intuition or inner writer’s voice is a higher level form of being creative and productive.

“This is what I find with writers who begin to trust their intuitive voice – the scared aliveness that accompanies the first tentative forays,” writes Judy Reeves in  Wild Women, Wild Voices: Writing from Your Authentic Wildness . “Writing from this place can cause your hand to shake and your heart to skitter….When we write from this place we’re no longer playing it safe; we may be breaking some rules, telling some secrets, but by damn! we’re writing from our most authentic wildness.”

5. Avoid distractions, especially when you’re not motivated to write

The less motivation and interest you have in a topic, the more important it is to avoid distractions. Whether the distractions in your life are self-made (you can’t resist visiting writers’ forums or Tweeting during your writing time) or other-oriented (your kids, dog, job, or spouse urgently need your undivided attention at the exact moment you sit down to write), you need to find a way to deal with them.

“My best tip for staying motivated to write the first draft came from Randy Ingermanson’s Snowflake Method,” says Delena on 6 Tips For Writing First Drafts . “I was actually able to get through a first draft faster and more easily than ever before, rather than burn out half or three-quarters of the way through my book. I stayed motivated and didn’t get bored.”

Here’s what Ingermanson says about The Snowflake Method: “Before you start writing, you need to get organized. You need to put all those wonderful ideas down on paper in a form you can use. Why? Because your memory is fallible, and your creativity has probably left a lot of holes in your story — holes you need to fill in before you start writing your novel. You need a design document. And you need to produce it using a process that doesn’t kill your desire to actually write the story.” – from How to Write a Novel Using the Snowflake Method .

6. Interview someone passionate about the topic

Passion and fire are contagious! This last and final tip for writing about boring topics might be the easiest one – if you can find passionate experts. Even better if you find experts who are eccentric, perhaps a little odd or strange. You can blend their quirks or personality into your topic. Those personal details will bring your writing to life for both you as the writer and for your readers.

Not sure how to approach experts or professionals about the topic? Tell them you’re a writer who knows nothing about their subject. Explain what you’re working on, why, and how stuck you feel. You’d be surprised at how eager most people are at sharing their knowledge and expertise with writers. Ask the expert what they love about the topic, how they first became interested in it, and if they’ve ever been bored by it. The answers might surprise you.

Your turn, fellow scribes! How do you stay motivated when you’re writing about something boring?

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bored meeting attendants.

Indifferent boredom, one of the five types, can be rather relaxing.

The Most Boring Article You'll Read Today

The kind of boredom you experience most often may be linked to your personality, say researchers.

Who knew boredom could be so interesting? But it's not just being bored; it's what kind of boredom you are experiencing that has researchers intrigued.

According to an article published in the journal Motivation and Emotion , there are five types of boredom—which is one more than the research team expected to identify. The boredom varieties range from a calm and pleasant experience to something more like depression.

The research team, led by Thomas Goetz of the University of Konstanz and the Thurgau University of Teacher Education in Konstanz, Germany, collected real-time data from university and high-school students multiple times a day over a two-week period. They found that boredom is not only widespread—every student in the study experienced some level of boredom—but it's also more common than other emotions. "Boredom is the most often and most intense emotion experienced by students," wrote Goetz in an email, "much more intense than enjoyment, anxiety or anger."

Students reported if they were bored, answered questions about their positive or negative feelings, and rated how calm or fidgety they felt. From these reports the researchers identified five different types of boredom. They also found that tedium is personal. "People tend to experience specific types of boredom," said Goetz, which could mean that boredom is linked to your personality.

So, which type of boredom do you experience?

Indifferent boredom: This is a pleasant form of boredom, said Goetz, giving as an example a student who has had a really long day. "You go to a class, you are tired, and the class is boring. However, the boredom is experienced as rather relaxing and even positive. It is still boredom, but you like being bored." Another example? Zoning out on the couch in front of a marathon of trashy reality TV.

Calibrating boredom: Do you let your thoughts wander? If you are open to new ideas but don't feel any motivation to actually get up and do something, that's calibrating boredom. "It is like daydreaming," said Goetz, "but not actively searching for new actions."

Searching boredom: If you have ever responded to the question "why did you do it?" with "because I was bored," you have possibly experienced searching boredom. People who experience searching boredom are highly motivated to find a more interesting activity. This type of boredom can lead to innocuous behavior like texting a friend, or may prompt violent or risky actions, explained Goetz. "However, searching boredom can also result in highly creative and positive actions," he said. "Thus, it is a big chance—it leads to actions."

Reactant boredom: Trapped in a boring lecture or never-ending meeting? You may be experiencing reactant boredom. When you can't change your circumstances—get up and leave the classroom or conference room—your boredom may be accompanied by restlessness and aggression, along with the desire to do something else. "You are bored, you can't leave the situations, and this goes in line with feelings of aggression," said Goetz.

Apathetic boredom: This type of boredom was a surprise to the researchers. The other types were first identified in a 2006 study that Goetz participated in, but apathetic boredom—a very unpleasant form of boredom accompanied by a lack of motivation—emerged from this recent research. It seems to be similar to depression, and it may have more negative consequences than other types.

"Apathetic boredom can be assumed to be detrimental for personal psychological health," Goetz said.

Are there more ways to be bored out there? "I don't think that there are further types of boredom," said Goetz, "but let's see."

Follow Katia Andreassi on Twitter .

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Gambling is everywhere now. When does that become a problem?

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How to Write Essays on Boring Topics

Paper4college.com

It is true that sometimes teachers ask you to write an essay and give a boring topic leaving you no choice. Everyone, who faces such a situation, feels upset and stressed, as it is well-known that an exciting theme provides the half of writing success. However, you probably expect to spend several hours on creating such an essay and finally get a poor grade. There is no need to suffer and waste your time. Here, you can find the particular ways of working on boring topics and dealing with your task successfully.

It Is Not So Boring

First of all, you should keep in mind that topics you are given by your teacher may be not as boring and dumb as they seem to be. It is essential to be able to review your interests and find in the subject of writing something, which is connected to your hobbies. Do not forget that even some strange and unusual topics, which seem uninteresting to you, just should be researched well to let you understand their benefits.

It Has to Be Done

The golden rule for students, who wish to get good grades, is that the home assignment should be done even if it looks boring and unimportant. Professors will never put you an excellent final grade if you ignore their tasks. Thus, it is crucial to overcome yourself and start working on such essays. It will be a hard and long process. However, you can motivate and encourage yourself while writing. Just think about it as a significant task, which you have to do anyway.

It Is a New Challenge

Usually, writing something boring makes us feel stuck, so work on a single task may last days or even weeks. There is no wonder why it happens. No one has the desire to write boring texts and can quickly find a more amusing activity. It is a pretty good idea to comprehend this writing task as a new challenge. The faster you deal with it, the more productive and effective results you can get. Do not postpone writing such essays. You will only waste time in this way. Also, you will probably feel stressed and anxious while having a task of this kind and postponing it. It is better to create it quickly and forget about this boring assignment.

It Is Enjoyable

Try to find something pleasant and funny while writing an essay. Some topics are really boring and no one has a desire to work with them. However, you should try to provide your own research on this subject in order to find out the most unusual and interesting issues. Do not forget that it is possible to enjoy everything you do in case you have the right mood. Thus, it is better not to start writing if you are upset or stressed. Calm down and then, your writing will become much easier and pleasant. Try to learn how to change your mood quickly. For example, you can have your favorite snack to feel better and reach some happiness.

Some simple but effective tricks and techniques on your psychological changes and mood can greatly help you in writing. While being fully happy and satisfied, people rarely pay attention to such minor faults as a boring essay topic and enjoy every activity they do. Hence, the development of the positive attitude is probably the main secret, which can help you.

To sum up, it is difficult to write an essay if you do not like the given topic. As a rule, everyone wants to pick his or her own theme. However, the teacher’s instructions may be different. In this way, they test your skills and knowledge. It is hard to cope with a boring task. Nevertheless, it is possible. Just use our simple and useful recommendations to tackle it.

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Copyblogger

11 Ways to Bore the Boots Off Your Readers

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Eh? What was that you were saying? Of course you don’t ramble on like that boring old history teacher in high school.

You’re likeable. You tell stories . You keep it short.

But somehow, it’s not working.

Your content doesn’t get the tweets, shares, and comments it deserves. Sometimes you wonder …

Does your content not captivate your readers?

Are they clicking away?

Let’s be honest, it’s difficult to know for sure. You can’t see the doodling, the fidgeting, the yawns.

But there are warning signs of boring writing.

I’ve collected the 11 most common mistakes bloggers make that bore the hell out of their readers.

And of course, if you prefer to engage, entertain, and entice your readers … just turn these around, and make your content really work.

1. You’re breaking the rule of one

To engage your readers you share all kinds of great ideas. Sharing just one concept would be dull.

Wouldn’t it?

You’re talking your readers’ ears off. There’s nothing more boring than a story that goes in twenty different directions. Each article should have only one big idea . Each argument, each story, and each example should support it.

(If you have lots of ideas, that’s great. That means you have plenty of fodder for good content. Just take them one at a time.)

Not sure? Check the popular Copyblogger posts to the right of this post:

  • Each headline focuses on one concept
  • Each post concentrates on one idea
  • Each post encourages you with one call to action

Remember: being a blabbermouth is probably more dull than having nothing interesting to say.

2. You use full stops sparingly

Long sentences are cumbersome, boring, and spiritless — especially if you use long and difficult words. Why not use an extra full stop (what you in the U.S. call a period) halfway? Or two?

Short sentences are easy to read, lively, and entertaining.

Favor short sentences. And use full stops as often as you can.

If you’re unsure about using a colon, semi-colon, or a full stop, always choose a full stop. Among punctuation marks, full stops are your best friend.

3. You’re too big for your boots

Please don’t bore your readers with difficult words.

Scrap jargon, cut scientific words, and replace long words with short words. Plain English helps your reader comprehend your message. And complex language doesn’t make you look more intelligent .

Your readers like to be lazy, don’t exhaust them with boring writing.

They’re not interested in learning your extensive vocabulary. Just help your readers solve their problems.

4. You stick to high school rules

Formality is tiring. No one wants to read your school essays, so stop trying to please English teachers and start pleasing your readers.

Start a sentence with because, and, or but .

Use contractions to strike a conversational tone.

Throw in some sentence fragments — Copyblogger is full of them. Short sentences keep your readers hooked.

Embrace the power of brevity .

Short words.

Short sentences.

Short paragraphs.

Your content will become exciting, entertaining, and fun. And your readers will love you.

5. You sound cold-hearted

Who likes to connect with indifferent and dispassionate people?

To engage with your reader you need to be charming. And that requires a human touch.

Follow these tips to avoid sounding like a dusty, detached headmaster:

  • Choose a topic you’re passionate about
  • Write as if you’re talking to one friend
  • Show your readers the ways in which you’re like them
  • Add vivid details to your stories
  • Use metaphors
  • Don’t be afraid of strong opinions
  • Avoid the passive tense
  • Occasional profanity is fine … if it fits your brand and your personality

Remember: Be warm. Nobody likes chatting with a cold fish.

6. You are too ploddingly predictable

Do you know about Shakespeare’s copywriting technique for grabbing reader attention?

Shakespeare misused words . He used nouns as verbs: he godded me . And adjectives as verbs: thick my blood . This technique surprises and “wakes up” the brain.

You can also use an unexpected word instead of a familiar word in a common phrase. For instance: Clothes don’t maketh the woman . Using an unexpected word has the same effect as misusing words.

Saying something unexpected jolts the brain into paying attention: a subtle, but neurologically proven trick .

7. You are long-winded

Do you avoid these subtle signs of tiresome wordiness?

  • Redundant adverbs and adjectives . If an adverb or adjective doesn’t add meaning; if it doesn’t help picture your story; and if it doesn’t convey an emotion — then it’s not required. Cut it.
  • Excessive words . If you can scrap a word without changing the meaning of your sentence, go ahead and skip it. Wearisome words that often can be cut include ought, in my opinion, that, just, actually, truly, and very.
  • Abstract nouns . Don’t add unnecessary complexity. Don’t write This blog topic is of a complex nature . Just write This topic is complex .

8. You sound like a despicable salesman

You know what makes a salesman pushy, uninteresting, and tiresome, don’t you?

Avoid these irritating sales mistakes, which are really just signs of boring writing:

  • Don’t ramble on about your products. Show the benefits to your readers.
  • Don’t waffle about irrelevant facts. Understand what keeps your readers awake at 3 a.m.
  • Education is your most effective sales tool. Use it liberally.

Remember: Teaching is the best alternative to sleazy sales .

9. You don’t study copywriting techniques

You write creative content to entertain your readers. You use fresh angles and a unique voice. Why isn’t it working?

Maybe you are too original .

No hard-and-fast rules tell you how to be fascinating. But the right copywriting techniques can make your content interesting and irresistible.

Follow these three tips to hold your readers spellbound:

  • Learn how to command attention with trigger words : Use words that invoke and engage emotion.
  • Practice the art of irresistible copywriting : Every sentence you write must make your readers want to read the next.
  • Understand the fascinating elements of content : Use fun, shock, or entertainment to make people pay attention.

Trying to grab attention by being “creative” for its own sake can hurt the effectiveness of content marketing.

10. You commit crimes against readability

You’ve carefully crafted your content. You’ve self-edited. Your text is informative, friendly, and commanding attention. But do you know your font choice can destroy the effectiveness of your precious words?

Avoid these stupid typography mistakes:

  • Your font is too fancy. Complex fonts are hard to read.
  • Your font is too small. Tiny fonts strain your eyes. Have you seen the large font Forbes.com uses?
  • Your font doesn’t contrast with its background. Why make it strenuous to read your content?

Use a readable font and don’t let your readers drown in dreary blocks of text. Be generous with white space :

  • Frame your text with white space
  • Reduce your content width
  • Write shorter paragraphs
  • Add extra white space around subheads
  • Interrupt your text with bullet points and numbered lists

And do you know the best complement to boring writing? Characterless, cliched photos make your content drab. Always use compelling images .

11. You don’t self-edit to boost charisma

Don’t worry about captivating your readers when you’re writing. Don’t interrupt your flow. Worry about being delightful, entertaining, and surprising only when editing.

Follow these 6 steps to add life to drab, dull content:

  • Check your engagement level. Don’t be a boastful ego-tripper. How often have you used the words you and your ?
  • Increase the number of really good bullet points . Can you convert paragraphs into numbered lists or bullet points? Short and to-the-point lists are more exciting than lackluster, solid paragraphs.
  • Examine your paragraph length. Aim for a maximum of five sentences per paragraph. Endless paragraphs are mind-numbingly tiring.
  • Calculate the average number of words per sentence. Try to have fewer than ten words per sentence. Cut long sentences in two and scrap redundant words.
  • Analyze average word length. Too many long words can make your content stuffy, stodgy, and stale. Can you replace long words with shorter ones? Can you swap difficult words for simple words?
  • Boost your content with trigger words. Can you make your text livelier by including vivid and emotional words?

Do you edit your text only once?

Increase the number of drafts you write. Focus on one step for each draft. You’ll be amazed how quickly this can make boring content more appealing.

Will avoiding these pitfalls really help you build an audience?

No strict guidelines will show you how to be engaging. No blueprint will tell you how to be charming. No code exists for keeping your readers glued to your content.

But you can avoid common, silly mistakes that promote boring writing. Be disciplined. And edit rigorously.

And the most important lesson? Write with passion. Display your enthusiasm. Entertain. Show your readers you care about them, and they’ll love you to bits. If you break a few rules along the way (including these ones) but you do it with passion, you’ll find that audience.

Your energy is contagious. Let your passion shine through, and you’ll gain a raving audience.

Are you ready to ditch boring writing?

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Henneke Duistermaat is an irreverent copywriter and business writing coach. She's on a mission to stamp out gobbledygook and to make boring business blogs sparkle. Get her free 16-Part Snackable Writing Course for Busy People and learn how to enchant your readers and win more business.

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Reader Interactions

Reader comments (70).

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June 18, 2012 at 6:45 am

Yup, these are some very true points that can make bu boring any day!

Be yourself, and use contractions and words that will make them more interested. Stories, short sentences, long sentences, etc… Find a way to make them more engaged with your writing.

Don’t make your posts way too long. That can make them tired and bored as well. Excellent article!

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June 18, 2012 at 6:52 am

Hey Henneke,

This is fantastic. My favorite principle was the first, “You break the rule of one.” It was one of those a-ha moments for me when you said to look over at the sidebar at the popular posts. They are painstakingly focused on a single concept. This is something I probably don’t do well enough, and sometimes long-winded WordPress 101 posts and things of that nature could be broken into multiple posts.

I’m going to give that a shot, along with a few of your other suggestions. Great post, thank you Henneke!

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June 18, 2012 at 6:57 am

All really great points but I would add another. If you begin to think that there is something about a post that you are not happy with after it is published, then edit it. Often you realise there is a chunk that adds little so dump it.

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June 18, 2012 at 11:46 am

I agree — often people think that once we’ve clicked “Publish,” the thing is set in stone. We make little tweaks after posts are published whenever we feel the content would benefit … that’s a great advantage to the web!

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June 18, 2012 at 8:59 am

There is nothing wrong with using industry jargon, but you have to keep in mind who your audience is. Obviously if you are writing for nuclear physicists you better know what you’re talking about and use the right terminology to do so. However, if you’re writing for someone that isn’t as knowledgeable about your niche as you it’s important to share the most important information in a way that is easy to digest.

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June 19, 2012 at 3:42 pm

Yes, that’s true, Nick. “Easy to digest” doesn’t necessarily exclude jargon. It depends on your audience.

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June 18, 2012 at 9:38 am

Is that you in the picture Henneke?

June 18, 2012 at 12:32 pm

Henneke is nicer looking, but I think she may *feel* that way after reading boring content. 😉

June 19, 2012 at 3:38 pm

Phew. 🙂 Thank you, Sonia.

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June 18, 2012 at 9:39 am

What a great post for a Monday morning! I loved it.

I would pay attention to “Point 3. You’re too big for your boots.” Keep your target audience in mind when you write. If you’re audience is filled with CEOs, COOs, CFOs, Astrophysicists, etc., they may appreciate (or expect) ‘jargon’ and scientific words.

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June 18, 2012 at 9:44 am

We all need these reminders once in a while!

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June 18, 2012 at 10:16 am

Man that WeWe calculator really let’s you know how it is. Cool find. Now, how tactfully to break it to those friends of mine about their blog scoring 4% 😮

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June 18, 2012 at 10:25 am

Great info. (Full stop.)

June 18, 2012 at 11:47 am

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June 18, 2012 at 10:36 am

words to live by . . . thanks!

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June 18, 2012 at 10:56 am

An excellent article – fun to read with a few “Uh oh, that’s me” moments. In the past, reading my personal blog entries was more like watching a television miniseries. I had faithful readers who swore they loved reading me but…..

However, I feel that if multi-syllable words come naturally to a person in their daily speech, then they should be writing in the same way. For those who are often flummoxed by words like…well, flummox, it’s very helpful to add Dictionary.com to the toolbar. If we succumb to dumbing down our language, eventually we’ll devolve to grunts, uggs, ROFL’s and LOL’s.

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June 18, 2012 at 11:16 am

Wow! I’ve been trying too hard. If a persuasive argument ever needs to be written or verbalized, my family and friends always approach me. For whatever reason, I’ve not found that voice with my blog… I’ve not been able to make the same impact. Now I see why. Thanks for this post. I am ready!!!

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June 18, 2012 at 11:24 am

But I love starting sentences by breaking the rules. And I figure if Stephen King can do it – then so can I! I hate it when I get edited for being creative. Actually, sometimes a really long sentence CAN play in your favor – depending on what message you’re trying to pass off.

What bores me is an over-use of cute kitten pictures. Bleh.

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June 18, 2012 at 11:33 am

This is a terrific post — engaging & informative. I checked out the WeWeCalculator and my blog’s score was 84 — so there’s definitely room for improvement. I checked out Forbes, too, and I was surprised at how large the font is. You provided really great advice here. Kudos to you — and thanks!

June 19, 2012 at 3:45 pm

Thank you, Frances. Glad you found it engaging – I tried hard not to be boring 😉

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June 18, 2012 at 12:09 pm

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June 18, 2012 at 1:44 pm

As an English major, I needed to hear $4. Thanks for the reminder that it’s ok to break the rules!

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June 18, 2012 at 4:21 pm

Number 2 is a big one for me. If I pull up your blog page and see huge paragraphs and lengthy sentences that aren’t broken up with images or anything… I’m out.

Thanks for the great tips. I’ll be sharing this… and printing it for my fridge!

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June 18, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Just a teeny note to say thanks for all the stuff I’ve learned from Copyblogger in the two months I’ve been reading your blogs. I’m extra grateful for the free and extremely valuable information you guys pump out on a daily basis. I recommend you to all my writer friends.

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June 18, 2012 at 5:11 pm

No. 3 is a good one.

As it was once said “think as wise men do, but speak as the common people do”.

I think it was Aristotle who said that but I’m not sure.

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June 18, 2012 at 7:25 pm

Great points! A great tip I’ve picked up that would assist with most of these points is: “Read your copy out loud” If you sound boring to yourself, it will definitely bore the readers.

' src=

June 18, 2012 at 8:15 pm

You Wowed! me. Exciting post with exciting possibilities I can’t wait to try.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 12:50 am

Great tips but the one that really hits home for me is using the full stop more often. I’m as guilty as anyone for writing sentences that are too long. I will try to put this to use.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 1:49 am

Have just read my most recent blog (unpublished thank goodness) and cringed when I realised how many ‘rules’ I’ve broken. Thanks – I’ll be using this article to audit my content from now on.

June 19, 2012 at 3:47 pm

Yep. I use this as my own checklist, too.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 1:55 am

Wow, thank you so much. I have this problem with keeping my sentences short. Maybe it is because I usually talk too much. 🙂 You gave me some really great tips here, even better, I think I can implement them easily. Thanks!

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 2:54 am

It’s great to be reminded of some of the little things that make a big difference!

And I’ve come across a few people, lately, who’re afraid of big type on their pages. I’ll be referring them here.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 4:57 am

Brilliant – I try to do most of these – but it’s good to have a checklist and revisit now and again.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 9:08 am

Wow – what a great article. As a copywriter I know I break some of these rules (and DON’T break some of the rules when it’s necessary TO break them).

I always go back to this trick I learned in college English for concise writing. Go through your copy and circle every prepositional phrase. Get rid of as many of them as possible.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 10:51 am

And please, please don’t start your first paragraph with, “I’m writing this because…” Please hook me in. :o)

June 19, 2012 at 3:52 pm

Agreed, Nikole. That’s a pretty big sin (although I admit to having made that mistake in the past…)

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 11:11 am

Great Advice, Sandra. Thanks for sharing. I think using as many pictures as possible is also helpful. You obviously aren’t boring your readers.

' src=

June 19, 2012 at 1:29 pm

Hello Henneke,

Thank you for this great post! I loved all the tips.

One small disagreement I have is the number of sentences per paragraph. I usually recommend a maximum of three, unless you really need to get your point across.

Thank you for taking the time to write the article!

' src=

June 20, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Wow Henneke,

these are great tips – I’m always happy to learn how to be a better writer and it’s a craft that can always be refined and improved. Definitely some wonderful gems here,

thanks for sharing, Alan

' src=

June 21, 2012 at 12:32 pm

So glad you put rule #1 at, well #1. This was something I struggled with when I first started blogging. The temptation is still there to share tons of ideas in one post. Most people, though, just want a single, purposeful, concise idea. It seems to be the heartbeat of blogging. Thanks for the reminder, and for 10 more good tips, too!

' src=

June 21, 2012 at 10:50 pm

More than the how-to’s and tips on making good on anything, tips on what not to do are always welcome. Thanks for sharing this tips, I know many of us will be nodding in agreement as we go about your list and find out that we have made a few mistakes at one time or another.

' src=

June 22, 2012 at 2:49 am

What an awesome post!

One of the challenges I often have is trying to remember all these points without interfering with the flow of my writing.

I love the WeWe Calculator!

Will definitely use that more often.

Thanks Henneke

June 24, 2012 at 3:58 am

You don’t need to remember everything while writing. Write down a first draft. Don’t interrupt your flow. When you’re editing, you can use a check list, because it’s not easy to remember everything while editing either. I edit at least five times.

' src=

June 28, 2012 at 3:31 pm

This is a great post on how to avoid boring your readers. I especially like how you talk about keeping things short.

That is especially important when it comes to the length of your article or blog post. I find it’s best to keep the length of your article short enough that it only takes a couple minutes to read it.

I don’t have ADHD or anything, but I find my attention drifts away and I get bored if a news article or blog post is too long. If I’ve been reading an article for five minutes and I look and see that I’m only half way through it, I will generally just close the page and find something better to do.

Again, great post! There’s some wonderful advice here.

' src=

June 29, 2012 at 6:24 am

Rule #12: You stopped being human. When your writing becomes more about actions you want your readers to take and less about connecting it becomes stale and uninteresting and readers can sniff that out a mile away.

' src=

August 20, 2012 at 3:40 pm

Good #12, Marc.

My #12: Your writing is stuffed with fluff. Make every word count.

' src=

July 2, 2012 at 12:14 am

To me is really adding human touch to a post. Just read an social marketing article, it was boring. It was written by a Professor, that probably explains why. However, I suspected it was being ghost-wrote or PLR wrote. Because there is no soul in the article at all.

With so many blogs and information out there, how do we get originality in an article. Include the human touch, Readers like to feel the writers essence. Include experiences, personal stories is how I include human touch.

' src=

July 2, 2012 at 11:59 am

Thank you for the list. I am going to study it and implement some of your ideas!

' src=

January 10, 2013 at 12:31 am

Totally loved this post Henneke. Great one here.

I can’t believe i have learned a lot of things on this blog in the past few days. Thanks CopyBlogger.com.

This post really slaps me in the face. I always forget to write contents as personal as possible on my blog, whereas when building my blog at the first time, i wanted to build a personal blog with me speaking up my own opinion.

But over the time, i slowly forget about that objective and now i think my contents are becoming to boring to read until i realize it in the past few days, thanks to this CopyBlogger.com blog. Hopefully, i can stick to my first objective again to write personal articles from now on, not some boring news update.

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Elektrostal

Elektrostal Localisation : Country Russia , Oblast Moscow Oblast . Available Information : Geographical coordinates , Population, Area, Altitude, Weather and Hotel . Nearby cities and villages : Noginsk , Pavlovsky Posad and Staraya Kupavna .

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Elektrostal Demography

Information on the people and the population of Elektrostal.

Elektrostal Population157,409 inhabitants
Elektrostal Population Density3,179.3 /km² (8,234.4 /sq mi)

Elektrostal Geography

Geographic Information regarding City of Elektrostal .

Elektrostal Geographical coordinatesLatitude: , Longitude:
55° 48′ 0″ North, 38° 27′ 0″ East
Elektrostal Area4,951 hectares
49.51 km² (19.12 sq mi)
Elektrostal Altitude164 m (538 ft)
Elektrostal ClimateHumid continental climate (KĂśppen climate classification: Dfb)

Elektrostal Distance

Distance (in kilometers) between Elektrostal and the biggest cities of Russia.

Elektrostal Map

Locate simply the city of Elektrostal through the card, map and satellite image of the city.

Elektrostal Nearby cities and villages

Elektrostal Weather

Weather forecast for the next coming days and current time of Elektrostal.

Elektrostal Sunrise and sunset

Find below the times of sunrise and sunset calculated 7 days to Elektrostal.

DaySunrise and sunsetTwilightNautical twilightAstronomical twilight
23 June02:41 - 11:28 - 20:1501:40 - 21:1701:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
24 June02:41 - 11:28 - 20:1501:40 - 21:1601:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
25 June02:42 - 11:28 - 20:1501:41 - 21:1601:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
26 June02:42 - 11:29 - 20:1501:41 - 21:1601:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
27 June02:43 - 11:29 - 20:1501:42 - 21:1601:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
28 June02:44 - 11:29 - 20:1401:43 - 21:1501:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00
29 June02:44 - 11:29 - 20:1401:44 - 21:1501:00 - 01:00 01:00 - 01:00

Elektrostal Hotel

Our team has selected for you a list of hotel in Elektrostal classified by value for money. Book your hotel room at the best price.



Located next to Noginskoye Highway in Electrostal, Apelsin Hotel offers comfortable rooms with free Wi-Fi. Free parking is available. The elegant rooms are air conditioned and feature a flat-screen satellite TV and fridge...
from


Located in the green area Yamskiye Woods, 5 km from Elektrostal city centre, this hotel features a sauna and a restaurant. It offers rooms with a kitchen...
from


Ekotel Bogorodsk Hotel is located in a picturesque park near Chernogolovsky Pond. It features an indoor swimming pool and a wellness centre. Free Wi-Fi and private parking are provided...
from


Surrounded by 420,000 m² of parkland and overlooking Kovershi Lake, this hotel outside Moscow offers spa and fitness facilities, and a private beach area with volleyball court and loungers...
from


Surrounded by green parklands, this hotel in the Moscow region features 2 restaurants, a bowling alley with bar, and several spa and fitness facilities. Moscow Ring Road is 17 km away...
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Mind Shift essay compilation returns

Third culture kid friendships. Funeral traditions. Gen Z and the workplace. These topics and more are included in this second volume of long-form essays produced in the Communication Leadership Winter 2024 course Professional Long-form Writing & Platforms.

As I laid out this issue of Mind Shift, a striking feature was the number of essays that began with the word “I,” evidence that in the words of writer Valeria Luiselli, these graduate students were writing themselves “into the world.

One of the paradoxes of first-person writing is that the more specific you are to documenting your own lived experiences, the greater the chance that readers will identify with what they absorb off the page. The universal experience is revealed through individual stories.

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Elektrostal

Elektrostal

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Elektrostal , city, Moscow oblast (province), western Russia . It lies 36 miles (58 km) east of Moscow city. The name, meaning “electric steel,” derives from the high-quality-steel industry established there soon after the October Revolution in 1917. During World War II , parts of the heavy-machine-building industry were relocated there from Ukraine, and Elektrostal is now a centre for the production of metallurgical equipment. Pop. (2006 est.) 146,189.

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It’s Fine if Investing Bores You. Some Money Pros Feel the Same Way.

For many financial professionals, investing is just a tool to help people achieve their meaningful life goals.

An illustration of a person in a suit leaning on a door. Piles of paper with stock names are overflowing from the room.

By Ron Lieber

For a certain type of money professional, there is a particular question that is decidedly unwelcome, and it tends to come up in a variety of social settings: Got any hot investment tips?

No. The answer is always no.

To the financial advisers who feel this way and those in similar lines of work, investing is necessary, but it may not be particularly interesting and it doesn’t spark a whole lot of joy.

These professionals know how to invest, and they care about getting it right. But to them — and perhaps to you, too — investments are simply a tool that helps people achieve their most meaningful goals. And helping people define those goals and then achieve them is what makes the job satisfying.

There is nothing wrong with this. In fact, it may be the healthiest way to think about money management, whether you manage your own finances or are trying to find someone to work with who feels the same way.

Defiance Requires Bravery

Making goals — and the ongoing, deeply meaningful conversations required to set and refine them — a higher priority than detailed attention to the stock market may seem reasonable and even obvious. The financial services industry, however, struggles with it.

For decades, stockbrokers made more money when you traded stocks, which encouraged more trades and investment strategizing. Many financial planners still base their fees on the assets they manage for you, which tends to center too many conversations on how (and how aggressively) they invest those assets.

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Readers respond to essays on long Covid, hypochondria, and more

Patrick Skerrett

By Patrick Skerrett June 22, 2024

Illustration of a large open envelope with many symbols of healthcare and science pouring out, on a purple background

F irst Opinion is STAT’s platform for interesting, illuminating, and maybe even provocative articles about the life sciences writ large, written by biotech insiders, health care workers, researchers, and others.

To encourage robust, good-faith discussion about issues raised in First Opinion essays, STAT publishes selected Letters to the Editor received in response to them. You can submit a Letter to the Editor here , or find the submission form at the end of any First Opinion essay.

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“Long Covid feels like a gun to my head,” by Rachel Hall-Clifford

Thank you for this. I’m a 65-year-old woman who’s Covid cautious and wears a mask in public places (yes, in 2024). I’ve never had Covid as far as I know, and I try to keep up with the research. I feel like everybody would be more cautious if they read this article on long Covid, because it helps to really understand the horrible ways that a mild case of Covid can affect your life in ways that are unimaginable.

— Hildy Hogate

“I’m a hypochondriac. Here’s how the health care system needs to deal with people like me,” by Hal Rosenbluth

Health anxiety is the less biased term, rather than hypochondria with all its comic baggage.

Though the writer likes full body scans for himself and they suit his particular fears, many, many people with health anxiety, including me, wouldn’t get within 10 feet of a full body scan. It would be the opposite of reassuring.

Even if it did reassure for the moment, anyone with health anxiety knows reassurance is short-lived. A scan done in, say, January, might reassure a non-anxious person for the next six months. But it would be the rare person with health anxiety who would feel reassured for more than a couple of weeks.

And why on earth would you want to create a separate billing code for this, which would, without question, be used to pick out, stigmatize, and limit access to medical care? That doesn’t help patients, it soothes and enriches insurers, who would undoubtedly limit access to care based on a scan. How long would it take before you called to make an appointment with your doctor and were told sorry, your insurance won’t cover an office visit — your scan said you have no problems?

The writer’s personal experience, psychology, and taste for scans are just that, personal. They don’t generalize to most, or even many, of those who suffer from health anxiety.

— Maria Perry

“NIH needs reform and restructuring, key Republicans committee chairs say,” by Cathy McMorris Rodgers and Robert B. Aderholt

I agree with the authors that NIH needs reform. I was an athletic, otherwise healthy person who was struck down and disabled by long Covid in January 2022. For over two years, I’ve watched life pass me by as NIH has fumbled the $1.15 billion allocated to it by Congress to study and treat long Covid. This initiative, known as RECOVER, has failed to publish any research that furthers our understanding of the underlying cause of long Covid and the vast majority of clinical trials they’ve launched are for drugs that people have already tried and found unhelpful.

Perhaps NIH would not have bungled the long Covid funding had it not completely ignored other post viral diseases, namely myalgic encephalomyelitis (ME) for the past 40 years. ME receives only $15 million a year — the most underfunded disease per patient burden at the NIH.

NIH should reevaluate how it allocates funding to diseases and base allocations on objective patient burdens. HIV, a disease with treatments that allow people with it to live mostly normal lives, receives $3.3 billion annually through NIH. Meanwhile, ME patients are disabled, have no approved treatments, and suffer a higher patient burden. Covid long haulers are suffering the same fate, many struck down as first wavers in March of 2020 are still disabled and sick as ever over four years later. Despite this, there is still no yearly allocation for long Covid in NIH’s baseline budget, as funding has only ever come from one time appropriations. NIH should right-size funding for ME and long Covid and start taking these diseases seriously.

— John Bolecek, long Covid patient

“Addressing health care workers’ trauma can help fight burnout,” by Sadie Elisseou

Thank you for writing this essay on the trauma and burnout that are all too common among today’s health care workforce. I applaud you for underscoring the importance of trauma-informed organizations and the critical value of workplaces that are safe, supportive, and flexible.

As a nurse educator and researcher, I have come to understand the important role of resilience in the work that nurses do. Considering two-thirds of nurses (65%) experience burnout, resilience-building skills are critical to mitigating nurse exhaustion and preserving our nation’s nursing pipeline. If actions are not taken to better protect the physical and mental health of our healthcare workforce, patient care will suffer. Lawmakers must take notice.

Some efforts in Congress have been successful. Congress has introduced legislation to reauthorize the Dr. Lorna Breen Provider Protection Act , bipartisan legislation that recognizes the need for mental health resources and support programs for healthcare professionals. Since its original enactment, this act has been instrumental in funding grant programs for mental health training, education, peer support, and crisis intervention services.

The reauthorization of this measure would expand grants to more than 200,000 other types of health care settings as well as renew the focus on reducing administrative burden for health care workers. While this bill is not a perfect solution, it does provide needed to support for a workforce that is understaffed, overworked, and in need to relief.

I urge Congress to finish the job and fully reauthorize the Dr. Lorna Breen Provider Protection Act this year.

— Stephanie Turner, R.N., Ed.D., M.S.N., ATI Nursing Education

About the Author Reprints

Patrick skerrett.

Acting First Opinion Editor

Patrick Skerrett is filling in as editor of First Opinion , STAT's platform for perspective and opinion on the life sciences writ large, and host of the First Opinion Podcast .

STAT encourages you to share your voice. We welcome your commentary, criticism, and expertise on our subscriber-only platform, STAT+ Connect

To submit a correction request, please visit our Contact Us page .

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    It Is Enjoyable. Try to find something pleasant and funny while writing an essay. Some topics are really boring and no one has a desire to work with them. However, you should try to provide your own research on this subject in order to find out the most unusual and interesting issues. Do not forget that it is possible to enjoy everything you do ...

  15. Avoid These 11 Signs of Boring Writing

    And complex language doesn't make you look more intelligent. Your readers like to be lazy, don't exhaust them with boring writing. They're not interested in learning your extensive vocabulary. Just help your readers solve their problems. 4. You stick to high school rules. Formality is tiring.

  16. Edwin Boring

    Edwin Garrigues (Garry) Boring (23 October 1886 - 1 July 1968) was an American experimental psychologist, Professor of Psychology at Clark University and at Harvard University, who later became one of the first historians of psychology.A Review of General Psychology survey, published in 2002, ranked Boring as the 93rd most cited psychologist of the 20th century, tied with John Dewey, Amos ...

  17. Joel Palhegyi at San Diego Miramar College

    Endless essays, not exaggerating. Not one quiz or test, constant long writing and reading. Only graded on long boring essays nobody cares about and long, weekly uninteresting discussion posts. IMO, Bad essay prompts that were hard to write about. However, if you prefer only writing and zero multiple choice stuff, you'll like him.

  18. Hey all, I wrote a long and boring essay that I think ...

    Posted by u/matt08220ify - 10 votes and no comments

  19. Elektrostal, Moscow Oblast, Russia

    Elektrostal Geography. Geographic Information regarding City of Elektrostal. Elektrostal Geographical coordinates. Latitude: 55.8, Longitude: 38.45. 55° 48′ 0″ North, 38° 27′ 0″ East. Elektrostal Area. 4,951 hectares. 49.51 km² (19.12 sq mi) Elektrostal Altitude.

  20. Elektrostal

    In 1938, it was granted town status. [citation needed]Administrative and municipal status. Within the framework of administrative divisions, it is incorporated as Elektrostal City Under Oblast Jurisdiction—an administrative unit with the status equal to that of the districts. As a municipal division, Elektrostal City Under Oblast Jurisdiction is incorporated as Elektrostal Urban Okrug.

  21. Mind Shift essay compilation returns

    These topics and more are included in this second volume of long-form essays produced in the Communication Leadership Winter 2024 course Professional Long-form Writing & Platforms. As I laid out this issue of Mind Shift, a striking feature was the number of essays that began with the word "I," evidence that in the words of writer Valeria ...

  22. Every Russian city/town flag that has an atom in it

    It's not just some random fish, it's a pike, hence it's so long. The reason to show it is the name of this neighbourhood of Moscow, which literally translates to „Pike's place", arguably named so after a boyar with such a nickname. And the atom is there because the Kurchatov research institute is situated there.

  23. Gilead's long-acting HIV drug superior to daily pill Truvada in study

    Gilead Sciences said on Thursday a late-stage study showed its long-acting injectable drug was more effective in preventing HIV infection in women compared to its existing daily pill Truvada ...

  24. Nancy Brophy case joins long list of Oregon true crime sagas ...

    The current podcast, "Happily Never After: Dan and Nancy," from Wondery in partnership with The Oregonian/OregonLive, tells a story based on a shocking 2018 Portland murder, in which a woman ...

  25. Elektrostal

    Elektrostal, city, Moscow oblast (province), western Russia.It lies 36 miles (58 km) east of Moscow city. The name, meaning "electric steel," derives from the high-quality-steel industry established there soon after the October Revolution in 1917. During World War II, parts of the heavy-machine-building industry were relocated there from Ukraine, and Elektrostal is now a centre for the ...

  26. Boeing Starliner: Two astronauts wait to come home amid ...

    Boeing's Starliner spacecraft was set to mark its crowning achievement this month: Ferrying two NASA astronauts on a round trip to the International Space Station, proving the long-delayed and ...

  27. Investing Can Be Boring. Some Financial Advisers Prefer It That Way

    Over the long term, this approach is likely to give you better returns. Delight Comes From Different Conversations Buying dull, market-tracking index funds has come to be known as passive investing.

  28. Readers respond to essays on long Covid, hypochondria, and more

    "Long Covid feels like a gun to my head," by Rachel Hall-Clifford Thank you for this. I'm a 65-year-old woman who's Covid cautious and wears a mask in public places (yes, in 2024).

  29. Leopold Aschenbrenner's "Situational Awareness": AI from now to 2034

    Leopold Aschenbrenner — formerly of OpenAI's Superalignment team, now founder of an investment firm focused on artificial general intelligence (AGI) — has posted a massive, provocative essay putting a long lens on AI's future.. Why it matters: Aschenbrenner, based in San Francisco, relies on lots of speculation and projection.So none of this is set in stone.