how to write a bar mitzvah speech

Bar Mitzvah Speech

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(*Of course, if you’re looking for more than ‘advice’, check out all the different ways the Speechy team can help you write & deliver a great speech. Or check out our new AI-powered team member, SpeechyAI .)

Here’s looking at you, kid. Literally.

Regardless of whether they began walking at six months, became the cross-country champion or they have finally managed to eat their vegetables without crying, there isn’t a more intimate way of honouring a child’s transition to adulthood than a well-written speech.

How To Structure Your Bar Mitzvah Speech

• Welcome the guests: Acknowledge those who have come to celebrate this special day.
• Share some   anecdotes from either your childhood or your son’s. What quirks and habits have made him into the man he is today?
• Thank the family: Pay tribute to those who have helped raise you or your son.
• Finish with a nod to the future: Look forward to this new, wonderful chapter of your/your son’s life.

Let’s run through it in more detail…

Welcome The Guests

If you’re writing a speech for your son’s Bar Mitzvah, begin by welcoming those who have joined you for this joyous celebration.

Warm up acknowledging the fact you are no longer able to lie about your child’s age in order to purchase discounted theme park tickets. Confess that not only are you ready to part with your child’s youth, and certainly not ready to give up playing Nintendo with him.

If you are sharing a few words to commemorate your own Bar Mitzvah, it’s likely you’ll be doing so after your parents. Thank them for your kind words, but don’t forget to remind them that becoming an adult today doesn’t mean they can start charging rent tomorrow.

Share Some Anecdotes

As a parent of a young man entering the next chapter of their life, you’ll have a vault of memories and have witnessed the development of his personality traits. Reminisce on old stories and habits that will allow the room to recognise the person you’re talking about today.

It goes without saying that, as a proud parent, you’ll want to spend hours gloating about the qualities in your son that you admire the most, but remember, you’re a parent! It’s almost a given that you take each and every chance to embarrass them.

Humour always goes down well in the context of even the most emotional of speeches, and this could be the perfect opportunity to remind your son how he has been an adult way before his years…as he continuously ran around the house as a toddler in his mum’s high heels and lipstick.

Equally, if you’re giving a speech at your own Bar Mitzvah, you may want to reminisce on your earliest memories and share a few favorites. No doubt you’ll have many heart-warming moments with your parents as you explored your faith and being a child, but the room will definitely appreciate a funny throwback and forgotten tale to get them laughing.

Remember, storytelling is a social bonding juice, so don’t just rely on adjectives. Bring your descriptions to life with great anecdotes that illustrate your points.

Thank The Family

Whilst it can be argued that every amazing quality in your son comes from the genetics of you and your partner, there will also be many family and friends that have contributed to your son’s remarkable childhood.

If you have any grandparents that took on multiple babysitting duties, or a favourite Uncle who has helped you prep for this particular day, be sure to acknowledge those who have helped you on this journey.

To The Future

Closing the door on childhood and walking into the daunting life that is adulthood can be quite daunting. If you are writing a speech to honour your son, touch on the traits and stories you mentioned previously and say how you think these will develop into adulthood.

Being a stubborn teenager may be ever-so-slightly-annoying now, but not giving up on what they want will be an amazing trait to carry into their future. No matter how many embarrassing anecdotes you’ve shared, wrap up by reminding them about how immensely proud you are and that you have no doubts about the adult they’ll become.

And if you are concluding your own Bar Mitzvah speech, what do you think your version of adulthood will look like? Are there any dreams you have or career goals you want to achieve? Or you are happy just going with the flow whilst aspiring to be half the adult your parents are.

Writing a great speech is only half the challenge. You also have to deliver the thing! Read our Delivery Advice to get a few tips.

Of course, whether it’s writing or delivering your speech that you need help with, Speechy can help. We’re famous for our celebration speeches as well as our wedding work.

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Our advice has been quoted everywhere from  The New York Times  to  Grazia  and from Forbes to The Observer . Our founder has also featured on the  BBC Sounds’ Best Men podcast with Jason Manford and written ‘ The Modern Couple’s Guide to Wedding Speeches’ , published by Little, Brown.

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Home » Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech from Parents & Family: Step by Step + Examples

Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech from Parents & Family: Step by Step + Examples

Your child’s big day is around the corner…

I bet you’re excited… it’s a big day!

But hang on a sec…

Are you excited because it’s your child’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah?

Or are you excited (read: terrified ) because you’d like to give your son/daughter a nice Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech, but you have NO IDEA what to say (or where to start)?

I’m about to show you exactly how to write a terrific Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech – step by step (without putting your guests to sleep in the process).

Note: This guide is useful not just for parents. Any family member who’s looking to write a speech for the Bar/Bat Mitzvah: parents, grandparents, siblings, friends… you name it.

Note 2:  I also wrote a similar guide that helps  Bnai Mitzvah write their speech . Feel free to send it to them if they could use some help. 

Table of Contents

Creating the Speech Outline

Got your pen and paper ready?

Ready to write a speech that’ll make Stephen King’s novels look like children’s books? 

Hold your horses there, tiger!

Before you start burning the midnight oil, you might want to start off with a plan first.

After all… you wouldn’t build a house without drawing a blueprint first, now would you?

So why would you start writing without an outline?

A speech outline gives you structure. And it’s that structure that can save you hours of staring at a blank piece of paper trying to figure out what to write (or say).

Been there, done that, don’t recommendat.

Now… my spider senses tell me that you’re wondering: “OK, genius… how do I create an outline?”

Thankfully, you don’t have to reinvent the wheel. Here’s an outline you can use to write your Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech:

Note: I included a bunch of Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech examples at the end of this article that follows this precise outline.

• Thank everyone for coming . Mention a few names you’d like to personally thank (like your family who traveled from a distance to celebrate with you, your in-laws if you want them to finally like you, or your boss if you’d like to improve your odds of a promotion)
• Start your speech with a hook to capture your guest’s attention (they’re probably on their phones)
• Optional: Slip in a joke if it makes sense (like I just did above).
• Tell a personal story that relates to your son/daughter. Focus your story on your son/daughter’s qualities and likes.
• Optional: Throw a joke or two in the middle.
• Optional: Include a Dvar Torah
• Bless your son/daughter . Tell them how much you love them, and how much you’re proud of them.
• Wish everyone a pleasant evening
• Optional: Wrap it up with another joke for good measure

Now that we’ve got a rough outline – time to think of what we actually want to say.

Brainstorming: Collecting Notes, Ideas & Stories (and Jokes)

This is the fun part…

This is where you  brainstorm & collect everything you’d like to say to your son/daughter on their special day:

• Personal stories & anecdotes from the past
• Lessons, analogies, and metaphors
• Blessings & wishes

Let the creative juices flow.

Feeling stuck? Here are a few places you can draw inspiration from:

• Start with listing “bad” ideas . Good ideas often come from bad ones.
• Go for long walks & take long showers. Cliché, but it works.
• Ask your spouse for ideas. Who else knows your son/daughter (perhaps even better than you do)? Possibly your spouse…
• Ask your son/daughter . Who knows your son/daughter better than you AND your spouse? Yep – your son/daughter. Since it’s their Bar/Bat Mitzvah and you’re about to talk about them, who better to ask than the actual man/woman of the hour?
• See what other parents wrote for their children’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah . Use the example speeches I included below for some inspiration.

Got some notes & ideas written down?

Awesome… now, lock yourself in your office… because you’re about to start writing!

Writing the Speech

3…2…1 – start writing!

Now that you’ve collected a bunch of stories, ideas, and jokes – it’s time to put them all together and start writing your speech.

Here are a couple of writing tips you can use to write your Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech:

1. Write like you speak

Remember English class?

Good… now throw the textbook out the window and do the EXACT opposite.

Our natural tendency is to try and impress others with our fancy writing, trying to make Shakespeare proud. As a result – you end up walking to the fridge every 2 minutes to check “what’s new” (or worse – you open Facebook) = a.k.a writer’s block .

But here’s the thing…

When you give a speech – you shouldn’t sound like an English professor… you should sound like YOU.

Counter-intuitive, ain’t it?

Could you imagine people listening to your speech, and halfway through wondering: “ who the hell does this guy think he is ?!”

Bottom line : Write like you speak, Bevakasha…

2. Don’t write and edit at the same time.

When you write – write. When you edit – edit.

Writing and editing are 2 different mental processes. Don’t make the classic error of mixing the two of them together – you’ll just slow yourself down and drive yourself crazy.

3. Start with writing the body , then write the intro & wrap up

This is the 80/20 rule in practice: the body of your speech will be around 80% of your speech, so you better start there…

Once you’ve got the body written down:

• You can write your speech intro and smoothly transition into the speech body.
• You can write your speech wrap-up and smoothly transition from the speech body.

It’s like making a tuna sandwich: first, you prepare the tuna, then you wrap it up with the bread.

4. Don’t be boring!

Make your speech short & sweet, not long & tedious. People have short attention spans. If you start rambling endlessly you’ll notice people start to yawn and reach for their phones (if it’s not Shabbat).

Tip: Check out the “Practice, Practice, Practice” section below to make sure you don’t turn it into a snooze-fest.

Take Jacob Green, a Jewish young man from Florida. His little sister recently celebrated her Bat Mitzvah – and his father took the opportunity to play a few jokes on Jacob and his siblings:

“Rachel, I think you know this, but you’re the favorite. And you aren’t just our favorite, sometimes I think you’re everyone’s favorite. Wherever we go, the beach, the supermarket, a hotel – when we leave they’re always seem to be saying ‘bye Rachel,’ or ‘thanks for playing Rachel!’”

But does that mean you have to be a stand-up comedian to not be boring?

Heck no! You can give a terrific speech without forcing your awkward jokes on people.

5. Don’t force jokes if they’re not funny!

Don’t force the joke – spare us the “a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar” kind of jokes. The joke should either be relevant to what you’re saying or not be said at all.

Embarrassing your son/daughter on their Bar/Bat Mitzvah is a big no-no. You’ll have to live with the consequences (and probably make it up to them with one hell of a Bar Mitzvah gift ).

Editing the Speech

Hooray! You’ve got your first draft written down. Now, it’s time to edit it.

This is where you turn a blurb of text into something worth reading (or in this case, something worth listening to).

Many people don’t know this, but the real magic happens in the editing, not in the writing.

There’s a reason why newspapers and publications have both writers and editors on their payroll… And can’t succeed without the other.

Now, I don’t expect you to hire an editor to write a speech. Unfortunately (or fortunately) you’ll be the writer, editor, and in this case – also the speaker.

Don’t worry, I like keeping things simple.

In fact, to edit your speech effectively – all you have to do is remember RRRR (the 4 R’s) :

• Remove: Get rid of words or sentences you don’t need
• Rewrite: Rewrite complicated sentences to make it sound natural. Remember – this is a speech, not a college essay. Leave the complicated words out.
• Reorder: If a sentence breaks the natural flow of the speech, try moving it someplace else
• Repeat: Repeat until you’re satisfied.

Finally, proof read your speech to make sure it sounds good. Notice I highlighted the “read” part. This is a speech you’ll actually read out loud, not just submit to the local newspaper. Make sure it reads properly.

Tip: Don’t be a perfectionist about it. Your speech should sound authentic, not like a 1980’s radio news report.

Practice, Practice, Practice

Repetition breeds skill.

No, I didn’t hit CTRL+C and CTRL+V 3 times by accident. This was intentional – to illustrate how crucial it is to practice your speech and repeat it several times .

Here are a couple of speaking tips to keep in mind while you practice:  

1. Time yourself

Measure how long the speech takes.

Ideally, you’d want to keep it somewhere between 3-10 minutes. Otherwise, your guests will get impatient and bored (otherwise you’ll have to make it up to them with some pretty cool Bar/Bat Mitzvah souvenirs )

If it’s too long, edit your speech and try to make it shorter and snappier (remember RRRR ).

Your mirror is your friend. Practice giving your speech several times in front of the mirror, until it sounds “right”.

Tip: Your spouse is your 2 nd best friend (that sounded weird). Read your speech to your spouse to give you some cold-hearted truth.

2. Look at your son/daughter and your guests, not at your notes

If you haven’t practiced your speech properly – you’ll constantly go back and forth between your son/daughter, your guests and your notes.

That’s why practicing your speech is so important.

You’ll want to memorize your speech to the point where you (almost) know your speech by heart.

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have your notes with you when you speak. But use it as a helper, not as a guide.

3. Speak with emotion

You’re probably already emotional, so that should be easy.

Just don’t be afraid to show it.

Note: Yes, I’m talking to you dads out there who don’t like to show their feelings.

4. Match your body language and tone of voice to the words you’re saying

People overestimate the importance of the words and underestimate the importance of tone and body language.

A famous study from 1967 (!) showed that words are responsible for only 7% of personal communication (feelings and attitudes), while body language and tone of voice are responsible for 55% and 38% respectively.

• If you’re sharing a personal story – speak with emotion.
• If you’re telling a joke, tell it with a smile on your face.
• If you’re sharing a sad story, speak gently (and wipe that smile off your face).

In other words: don’t be a robot.

5. Be yourself

Be authentic. Don’t try to sound like someone you’re not.

Say what you feel and feel what you say.  

Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech Examples

Bar mitzvah speech example #1:.

This Jewish mother from LA shared the unique speech she gave her son, a computer gamer, for his Bar Mitzvah.

Take Notes: Notice how she uses a combination of stories, analogies, metaphors (from the Gaming world, of all places!).

Hello everyone and thank you so much for joining us for Michael’s Bar Mitzvah.

Now, I know for most of you, this isn’t your first time at the rodeo.

But for myself, my husband, and my extended family, Michael is the first Bar Mitzvah in decades!

I also know that many of the friends that have joined us here today have never been to a Bar Mitzvah or if they have they might not realize the whole tradition of the Bar Mitzvah ceremony . So I thought I would spend a little bit of time explaining what a Bar Mitzvah is, why we do it, what we are celebrating, and so on and so forth.

In essence, a Bar Mitzvah is the beginning of a child’s spiritual maturity. When boys are younger than age 13, and 12 for girls because everyone knows girls are more mature than boys, they are unaware of their spiritual selves. But after 12 and 13, a child, now a very young adult, can begin to form their morals, their values, and their spiritual beliefs.

Michael has been studying Hebrew and the Torah for pretty much his entire life. He actually had to memorize his Torah portion in order to be able to read it up here at the bimah!

As someone who has a terrible time remembering things, I find this feat to be extraordinary. But honestly, according to his father and I, Michael pretty much HAD to have a Bar Mitzvah. Everything in his life has been more or less controlled by myself, his father and to a certain extent his teachers and rabbis. Up until now, Michael’s life hasn’t really been fully his.

But now Michael is 13! He is leaving behind the era of being a child completely run by adults and is beginning to be able to spread his wings.

Like me, Michael was born wanting to control his life more than either his father or I really wanted him to. And now, finally Michael, you can begin to take control of your life starting with figuring out what kind of man you want to be.

The foundation of your morality has already been built through 13 years of teaching from your parents and from learning about Judaism. Now is the time you will learn who you really want to be and what kind of man you will become. But the good news is you don’t have to do this alone.

Even though you are now free to make more decisions on your own, you still have us, your family and your community to be here to help you when you get stuck. You have a wealth of love and knowledge sitting right here, celebrating you and your life!

The beauty of a Bar Mitzvah is it is the ending of one part of your life – being a child – and the beginning of the next chapter – learning how to truly be a good adult.

• Instead of just sitting in class and learning, you are now able to teach those who are younger than you.
• Instead of memorizing lines from your parsha , you can now begin to understand the meaning behind them and start to question things.

You are someone that has always needed to know what the boundaries are in any given task. You are now free to create some of those boundaries yourself instead of waiting for someone to tell you what they are!

Turning 13 means you’ll be able to fulfill more Mitzvot, such as the wearing of Tefillin …

The purpose of the Tefillin is to, besides becoming closer to G-d, connect the heart and the mind together.

As they say in the Spider-Man comics, “with great power comes great responsibility”.

Michael, you’re now about to begin a new era in your progression as a man.

The Tefillin isn’t another thing you have to do because you are Jewish and your father and I said so, it is a want to. You can choose to put it on, or not. But as someone who was born already possessing the abilities the Tefillin will help you acquire, let me tell you – it is worth it.

Frankly, I believe you, Michael, have already begun to develop as a man. Your growth this past year in school has been absolutely remarkable. Your father and I did our best to figure out how we could best support you as an individual, but ultimately the hard work was entirely up to you. And you did it!

Watching you blossom this year has been one of the most rewarding things I have seen in my life and I am honored that Hashem has blessed me with such a wonderful son.

Now I have a story for you:

This was back in the early sixties when the first mainframe computers were being introduced into business. Professor Abraham Polichenco, a pioneer in computer technology, visited the Lubavitcher Rebbe and posed a question to him:

“I know that everything that exists in the world, even something that we discover later in history, has its source somewhere in the Torah. So, where are there computers in the Torah?”

Without hesitation, the Rebbe answered, “Tefillin.” The professor was perplexed.

“What’s new about a computer?” the Rebbe continued. “You walk into a room and you see many familiar machines: A typewriter, a large tape recorder, a television set, a hole puncher, a calculator. What is new?

“But under the floor, cables connect all these machines so they work as one.”

The professor nodded enthusiastically. He hadn’t realized it before, but yes, this is all that a computer is: A synthesis of media and processing devices.

“Now look at your own self. You have a brain. It is in one world. Your heart is in another. And your hands often end up involved in something completely foreign to both of them. Three diverse machines.

“So you put on Tefillin. First thing in the day, you connect your head, your heart and your hand with these leather cables — all to work as one with one intent. And then when you go out to meet the world, all your actions find harmony in a single coordinated purpose.”

Michael, I know how much you adore computers and gaming. So, I am going to take the analogy of computers and Judaism a little bit further than the Rebbe did. I believe one could make an argument, that being a Jew is the ultimate in computer gaming!

You laugh but hear me out.

What is it about playing games on the computer that makes you so passionate about it? I think one of the reasons is the feeling of community you get when you’re working with your friends on a team to beat another set of virtual characters.

Judaism has the same thing! When we celebrate Shabbos every Friday night and make the prayers on the candles and bread and wine, we’re connecting to every other Jewish person on the earth who are also doing the exact same thing we are doing.

Do you remember the scene in Harry Potter when all of the good guys raise their hands up towards the sky and the light blows away the evilness of Voldemort?

That is kind of what I think happens when we light the candles on Friday night. The spirit of every Jew working together will be what brings Mashiach, right?

Another thing you enjoy playing video games is the challenge of learning how to win at the various levels. One more level mom! Turns out Judaism has the same thing!

The Zohar, otherwise known as the Jewish book of mysticism explains:

Viewed from the point of view of man’s service to G‑d, the levels of the soul may be described as five ascending levels of awareness of, and communion with, G‑d. They are called (in ascending order) Nefesh, Ruach, Neshama, Chaya, and Yechida. Regarding these levels of soul, the Zohar states that when a person is born, he’s given a Nefesh from the world of Asiya, the lowest world, representing the greatest concealment of G‑d.

If through his divine service and proper action, he makes himself worthy, he is then given Ruach on the plane of Yetzira. With greater effort, he can earn the revelation of Neshama, paralleling the world of Beriya. If he purifies himself greatly, he may be able to attain the level of Chaya paralleling Atzilut, and even Yechida — the G‑d consciousness of the level of Adam Kadmon and beyond.

Look, I barely understand what any of that means! But I DO know that if you continue to study and learn Torah, continue to be a good person and choose the right thing to do, you will eventually “level up” with your commitment and connection to G-D. And THAT is really something!

Michael, when you “win” a computer game, that gives you a strong sense of accomplishment. You DID something! You WON! Judaism can do the same thing for you. When you choose to eat a kosher meal, you are automatically winning! When you put on tefillin, you are winning! When you come to service and daven, you are winning! There are so many ways, 613 to be exact, that you can “win” at

Judaism! Now THAT is a game worth playing!

So, as I have just explained to you, Torah is really the ultimate “game”. One that I think you excel at playing. So today, on your Bar Mitzvah, I hope you understand that this is the ending of your have-to’s and the beginning of your want-to’s.

And if you choose to continue with your Jewish learning, there is no telling what you can accomplish.

Michael, I love you with all of my heart. I am so proud of you and may you be blessed with health and happiness for all the days of your life!

Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech Example #2: Short, Sweet & Funny

This is a speech given by Ronny, a father from Hartford, CT, who gave this speech on his son’s Bar Mitzvah.

Take Notes: Notice the witty jokes and the length of this speech: short, sweet and to the point.

Thank you, everyone, for joining us tonight in celebrating our beloved son’s Bar Mitzvah.

If you don’t mind, I’d like to say a few words to Yosef…

My dear son Yosef,

You’re celebrating your coming of age today… and because of that, look what happened – you forced your family from all over the world to come to your Bar Mitzvah.

But don’t worry, they have nothing to complain about. You’re our one and only son.

Could you imagine if they had to fly over and over again?

Yosef, I don’t know if you know how proud I am of you and everything you’re doing:

For those of you who don’t know: Yosef is at the top of his class, at the top of his Judo team and pretty much everywhere else.

Everyone knows that and sees that… But what no one sees is the hard work you put into everything do.

You’re a very talented young man… but talent can only get you so far in life.

It’s the talent, combined with your hard work that makes you so successful.

Sometimes your mother and I argue who you got it from (clearly, it came from me).

You inspire us and everyone around you to do dream big and do greater things.

And let me tell you…

In fact, I PROMISE you: if you keep working hard throughout your life, you’ll achieve amazing things… in life, in Torah, in Judo, everywhere…

Hard work – works.

I’m so proud of everything you’ve accomplished, and everything you’ll accomplish in the future.

I’m proud to be your father. Or, rather, I’m proud that you are my son…

I’ll always be in your corner and be your biggest cheerleader (I might even dance like one and embarrass you in front of your friends if I drink too much tonight)

Your mother and I love you very much… Forever and always!

Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech Example #3: The “Non-speech” Speech

Who said you have to give a speech, to begin with?

Miriam Snyder, a cantorial soloist from LA, gave me an interesting example from her son’s Bar Mitzvah:

You don’t have to make your guests cry on purpose… but hey, if you’re America’s next rising star (or whichever country you’re from) – then go hit the stage!

More Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech Examples

Take a look at this Bat Mitzvah speech given by famous TV & game show producer, Bob Boden (The Chase, Jeopardy & others):

Take Notes:  He uses his TV persona in his daughter’s blessing. Short, witty and emotional all at the same time.

Here’s a good example of a father telling the emotional story of his Bar Mitzvah being born. Notice the authenticity in his story, and the way he masterfully uses his tone of voice with the words he’s saying.

Take Notes:  Storytelling at its best: authentic, engaging and entertaining.

See… that wasn’t so bad, was it?

Writing a great Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech is easy if you have the right system.

Simply follow the steps in this article, and you’ll have an awesome speech ready in no time.

Note: It will definitely take you less time than it took me to write this article 🙂

And after you’re done writing your speech – I’d love for you to share it in the comments below… I’ll be more than happy to add it to the article!

How does that sound? 🙂

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i am looking for a funny poem for my brother yaakov his bar mitzvah is this week on friday night but i want a funny poem

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Crafting the Perfect Parent Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech

by Rabbi Danielle G. Eskow | Aug 24, 2023 | Life Cycle Events , Uncategorized

The Bar/Bat Mitzvah ceremony is a significant milestone in a young child’s life, marking his/her transition into adulthood according to Jewish tradition. As parents, it’s natural to feel immensely proud of your child and want to express your love and admiration through a heartfelt speech. This blog post offers a parent Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech sample, along with tips to guide you through crafting the perfect Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech, ensuring this special day is unforgettable for your child, family, and friends.

Short Summary

Parents must understand the importance of crafting a memorable Bar/Bat Mitzvah speech for their child.

Incorporate humor, emotion and personal anecdotes to create an inspiring and personalized speech.

Follow tips such as finding your voice, practicing regularly & incorporating Jewish values & traditions into your presentation.

Creating a Memorable Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speech

Creating a speech that will be remembered for many years is key to making an impression at a Bar/Bat Mitzvah. As parents, it’s important to share their child’s journey through life so far as well as express pride and thank family members and friends who have been supportive during the process. A memorable address can touch everyone present on such a special day in the boy’s life, leaving them with memories they won’t soon forget.

To craft this unforgettable moment effectively, it is vital to know what makes great Bar/Bat Mitzvah speeches: understanding parent roles in celebration events while including crucial components which bring emotion into play – all of these working together result in oration success!

The Role of Parents

Parents are essential to their child’s Bar and Bat Mitzvah celebration. This ceremony marks a spiritual transformation from child into young adult by instilling values and convictions as they enter adulthood.

The role of parents is crucial when it comes time for speech delivery at this special occasion. Words that express love and pride combined with accomplishments achieved throughout life will make your remarks memorable. Demonstrating encouragement in them maturing religiously makes it even more significant, which undoubtedly leaves an indelible impression on guests present at the event honoring your wonderful child!

Key Elements of a Great Speech

Creating a great Bar mitzvah or Bat mitzvah speech involves integrating humor, emotion and personal memories to captivate the crowd. Keep it succinct yet informative with an introduction, body and closing which will make a great D’var Torah. Acknowledge those who have helped you along the way, such as family members and friends, by expressing gratitude for their support. To gain ideas on how to deliver this powerful message, check out online examples of what other people used for successful speeches in years past. With these components combined there’s sure to be appreciation from all in attendance celebrating your child’s growth into adulthood impacting them positively throughout life moving forward

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Parent Bar Mitzvah Speech Examples

We have collected several examples of Bar Mitzvah speeches, which will help guide and motivate you in creating your own. These showcases illustrate the wide-ranging possibilities for constructing a speech that is reflective of your child’s unique history and character.

From deeply emotional to comical renditions, there truly is something available for every individual. To assist with conveying an address reflecting on this momentous occasion, these samples provide helpful insight into how to curate words specific to your recipient’s life story while simultaneously pleasing all who are present at the celebration!

Heartfelt and Emotional

For a truly special family moment, an emotive and touching speech is necessary to capture the audience’s attention. Incorporating storytelling along with humor or anecdotes can make your talk more memorable by highlighting your child’s remarkable qualities and accomplishments while also showcasing how important this event really is. It should be genuine in order for it to have the greatest effect on those present – making it an even more meaningful experience.

Humorous and Light-hearted

Creating a speech that is both humorous and heartfelt can result in an immensely proud moment for your child. One way to achieve this balance between humor and sentimentality while delivering the address is by using funny anecdotes or stories from their life. Using props, jokes, quotes, puns or gestures will boost audience engagement as well as help them remember it better.

Lighthearted teasing of quirks possessed by your child can be incorporated into the ceremony’s speech in order to bring smiles on everybody’s faces. Crafting such a combination of humor and sincerity ensures everyone appreciates what you have put together!

Reflective and Inspirational

Creating a speech to honor your child’s growth and encourage them towards their Jewish heritage can be an inspiring experience. Reflection on how the Torah portion relates to their journey offers a meaningful understanding of what accomplishments they have achieved. The talk should emphasize promoting good personhood while weaving in themes from Judaism – this will positively guide them through life’s challenges and create motivation along the way.

Tips for Writing and Delivering Your Bar or Bat Mitzvah Speech

As we have looked at some examples of speeches, it’s time to consider how best to write and present a meaningful Bar and Bat Mitzvah speech. By following these helpful tips, you can create an effective address that will be cherished by both your child and the gathered guests on this extraordinary day.

Begin with jotting down any thoughts or suggestions in just a few words as points. Take ample amount of time considering what essential facts should be included in the message. Then work through each point carefully so they are structured into one succinct narrative for the occasion of their Bar and Bat Mitzvah celebration!

Finding Your Voice

It’s essential to sound genuine and heartfelt when delivering your speech in order to create a strong connection with the listeners. Incorporate your own values, experiences, and beliefs into what you are saying for maximum effect. To discover this special voice of yours that resonates with audiences, think about who you really are as an individual. Crafting a narrative based on these aspects will make sure that everyone understands exactly where you’re coming from, enabling them to engage more deeply while listening.

Practice Makes Perfect

Preparing your talk is essential to make sure the delivery runs smoothly and that you have assurance during the event. Going over material thoroughly and rehearsing how it will be presented can help ease nerves when speaking before a crowd.

To use practice time as efficiently as possible, put these tips into action.

• Speak out loud while timing yourself.
• Practice in front of a mirror for observing body language or facial expressions made during speech presentation.
• Involve family members or friends who could provide constructive feedback on improving performance prior to delivering at an important occasion like this one today! Utilizing such methods should assist with better delivery overall plus making sure preparation has been completed beforehand so there are no unexpected surprises come showtime!

Engaging the Audience

Engaging the crowd is essential when delivering an effective Bar or Bat Mitzvah speech. Here are some tips for success: staying connected with your audience through eye contact, positive body language to emphasize points and boost a bond between you and them, plus demonstrate enthusiasm throughout your delivery. Utilizing these techniques can make sure that the address will be both unforgettable and enjoyable for all in attendance.

Effective posturing consists of gestures, facial expressions, as well as stance to help stress key thoughts while building trustworthiness among listeners – by knowing how to work with these methods you’ll capture everyone’s attention thus keeping it engaged during all parts of the Bar or Bat Mitzvah speech.

Incorporating Jewish Values and Traditions

For your Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah speech to be truly special, it is essential that you draw upon the rich Jewish values and traditions in order to make your words resonate with deeper meaning. By incorporating this cultural heritage into a heartfelt address at such an important milestone event for your child’s life, their Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah will become all the more meaningful.

The Torah Portion Connection

Creating a meaningful Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah speech that reflects your child’s journey with their Torah portion is possible by drawing connections between the two. Look for words, phrases or stories which have an impact on your own life and those of others around you – this will assist in forming strong ties from the scriptural text to your child’s individual experiences. This type of narrative can be very powerful when sharing at such an important moment as a Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah celebration. By reflecting upon these links and highlighting them throughout your speech, it gives greater recognition to both special people. The one being honored, Your child!

Blessings and Prayers

When making a Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah speech, including customary Jewish prayers and blessings serves to highlight the spiritual magnitude of this event as well as demonstrating honor for traditional Jewish practices. Such blessings such as Mi Shebeirach prayer for healing or even those traditionally offered by parents are commonly inserted into these speeches providing an intimate touch while emphasizing your child’s Judaism. Through doing so, you demonstrate respect for Jews’ customs and make it all more personal too. Creating a richer meaning not only in relation to your son/daughter but also on behalf of everyone present at the ceremony itself.

To bring together the perfect Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah address, one must include a unique combination of heartfelt anecdotes, humor and emotion while infusing Jewish values that are pertinent to this important life milestone. By using these tips mentioned here, you can create an unforgettable speech that will honor your child’s journey in celebrating his or her Bar Mitzvah and Bat Mitzvah event and be filled with joy, pride and lasting memories.

Frequently Asked Questions

What do you say in a parents bat mitzvah speech.

This morning, we were delighted to witness your strong sense of leadership as you led the congregation in prayer. We are so immensely proud [insert first name of your child], especially today on this special day when you have become a Bat Mitzvah! Congratulations and keep up the great work!

What do I say to my child on their Bar or Bat Mitzvah?

I’m filled with immense pride for you each and every day. Your achievement is the result of all your dedication, and I congratulate you on that!

Today marks a special occasion – let’s celebrate this Bar and Bat Mitzvah together!

What is the role of parents in a Bar or Bat Mitzvah speech?

In honor of their child’s coming-of-age, parents play a significant role in Bar Mitzvah celebrations. As part of this responsibility, they have the chance to express both love and pride for their son or daughter through meaningful words spoken during the speech. This is also an opportune moment to thank family members and friends who offered support throughout this time as well as recognize just how special achieving a Bar Mitzvah really is. Parents can share any advice from life experiences along with hopes for what lies ahead in store while addressing those gathered on such an important occasion.

How can I connect my child's Torah portion to their personal qualities or experiences?

Examining the topics of your kid’s Torah part and relating them to their own life is an effective way for constructing a thoughtful narrative that they can ponder upon.

What are some tips for engaging the audience during my Bar Mitzvah or Bat Mitzvah speech?

Maintaining eye contact, using confident body language and displaying enthusiasm are the best ways to make your speech engaging for any audience. Keeping a positive attitude will create an unforgettable experience that is sure to stay with those who have heard it. Utilizing these tips when delivering speeches ensures connecting with listeners in a memorable way.

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How to Create the Perfect Bar Mitzvah Speech

Your important coming-of-age ritual is fast approaching and that means you’ll need to articulate the components of your spiritual growth in front of your friends and family. You can even bring up other important rites of passage, like when the mohel circumcision procedure was conducted following your birth.

It’s time for your barmitzvah speech! Since you may have already heard a bat mitzvah speech and a bat mitzvah parent speech, you can easily brainstorm with your family to come up with a good story and flow. It’s not so scary when you know what to do. Below, we explain the steps you can take to secure a speech that makes everyone proud.

1. Start with An Outline of Your Speech.

Starting with an outline keeps you focused and allows your speech to have an easy-to-follow flow. Speeches are much like stories and require a basic structure that includes an introduction, a body, and a conclusion. Whenever you’re delivering a barmitzvah speech, there are certain elements to the message you can adhere to.

In your introduction, you can express gratitude to all attendees for their support of your coming-of-age ritual . In the body, you can share your personal feelings regarding your spiritual evolution and share an anecdote that epitomizes your strength and growth. When you conclude, you can turn your attention to your parents and 1) offer praise for their assistance in spiritual growth, 2) remind them they are loved immensely, and 3) finish by offering a blessing.

Think back to a memorable barmitzvah speech. Consider how the bat mitzvah speech you last heard was structured. Or try to recall the components of your favorite bat mitzvah parent speech. All of this will help you.

2. Identify Personal Stories.

As a young man emerging into the next phase of life, you house a vault of memories. Think about all the ways you have grown spiritually and jot down all the memories that come to mind. Try not to think of the “perfect” story, rather let the memories pour out from your heart. Put them on paper as they come, even if that means bullet points or long prose paragraphs.

This is also a good opportunity for you to connect with your family and discover what memories are most prominent in their minds, what has stood out the most from their perspectives, and what moments they cherish to this day. If you’ve heard them deliver a bat mitzvah speech, you know they remember all the little things. They may even help you recall stories from when you were younger and may have some anecdotes to share about your mohel circumcision procedure.

Here we summarize a few thoughts to consider, if you feel they deserve mention in your speech:

• How you have prepared for your special day
• What role you have taken with your family celebrations
• Your mohel circumcision procedure , which marked your faith and devotion from birth
• Your spiritual growth milestones, in the best way you can convey them
• Moments that demonstrate your growth into manhood

Don’t be afraid to incorporate humor here. This is a massive milestone in your journey and while speaking on your accomplishments and your religious progress is the main focus, you can always incorporate humor into your storytelling. Surely, there have been more than one or two moments during which you and your family have erupted in laughter. If you can weave humor into your speech, your audience is sure to be delighted along with you.

3. Incorporate the Torah.

As you brainstorm ideas for your speech, you will certainly come across a d’var Torah, which will help you better explain your evolution. There are many lessons to choose from and you can choose one which best relates to your personal experiences.

For instance, Abraham has always been a pillar in the realm of kindness, as he dedicated his life in service to others. Perhaps you can relate your inherent kindness to the story of Abraham and consider how you may have touched your friends with kind words and gestures, how you may have gone out of your way to help strangers, and how these lessons have gifted you with more wisdom throughout your life.

Abraham has taught many lessons, and two primary points he stresses in loving others include 1) exemplifying kindness with your entire heart and 2) going above and beyond in your quest to be helpful toward others. You can incorporate God’s words to Abraham, when he asked him to keep His covenant through the mohel circumcision procedure. Consider these teachings and how you have worked to exemplify them. From here, you are able to incorporate the Torah and correlate core teachings with stories of your own honorable behavior.

4. Write It All Down.

Once you’ve created your outline and you’ve jotted down the relevant stories you can recall, you can begin filling in the outline structure by putting it all on paper. Though it may feel counterintuitive, start your speech by filling in the body of it. Think of the last bat mitzvah parent speech you heard and recall how it was laid out.

The main portion of your speech is the body and should incorporate your personal stories and main points. When the body of your speech is filled out, it’s much easier to write out your introduction and your conclusion. This is because you already have the core of your speech completed and can easily incorporate it into both your introduction and conclusion.

Consider how you’d like to start your speech. Would you like to kick it off with a spiritual passage that you can weave into your entire speech? How about a quote that means something to you? You can also ask your parents about this and ask them to contribute some meaningful song lyrics or quotes they feel resonate strongly with them.

No matter what you choose to incorporate into your introduction and conclusion, note that unless the body portion of your speech is solidified, your intro and outro ideas may feel out of place, lacking congruence with the main portion of your speech. When you work around the body of your speech, you’re better able to create a harmonic flow that both sounds good once delivered and helps you stay on track once you’re in the moment.

5. Do Something Else.

Here’s another piece of counterintuitive advice: do something else. Whenever you’re working on something as important as a barmitzvah speech, it can feel like there’s a lot of pressure on you and you may experience overwhelm as you go through the process of developing it.

Your brain needs time to rest and reset after your initial writing session. Let your thoughts simmer on paper while you go off and tend to your regular day-to-day responsibilities. Try to recall your favorite bat mitzvah parent speech and what stood out the most. Feel confident with taking some downtime to engage with your favorite hobby, sit down with a cup of tea and a good book, or even watch a movie. All these actions give you sufficient time to let what you’ve written simmer, so when you come back to your filled outline, you have a new, refreshed perspective.

6. Edit and Rehearse.

With your fresh perspective, you’ll be able to identify pieces of your initial notes that come together seamlessly and also pieces that can be cut out of your final speech. Even when you have a great memory you’re excited to share, if it doesn’t fit into the overall flow of your speech, don’t hesitate to cut it out.

Most importantly, take the time to rehearse your speech from beginning to end. This will take a couple of tries but once you’re comfortable with the flow, you’ll be able to deliver it easily.

Delivering a barmitzvah speech (same with a bat mitzvah speech!) is one of the most satisfying experiences you are blessed to enjoy in your lifetime. This is an opportunity to make your speech your own and incorporate your deepest feelings of love and excitement along with being able to reiterate the importance of your Jewish faith .

So long as you deliver your speech with the fuel of love and kindness in your heart, you can’t go wrong. You will do a great job and represent your family and faith well. Here’s to a fantastic speech and celebration – Mazel tov!

We are excited to see you progress on your spiritual path! Did you find this article helpful? Share these tips with your friends on social media. They’ll thank you for it. Let us know how your speech goes and subscribe to our blog for more! And don’t forget – when you’re looking for a skilled Surgeon Physician Mohel, give us a call. We’re here to serve you.

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Guidelines for Bar/Bat Mitzvah Speeches

by Donna Jacobs Sife

A friend of mine living in Washington told me a story. When her son’s bar mitzvah was approaching one of her friend’s asked her “What’s your theme?” My friend thought for a moment and then responded, “Judaism”.

Thankfully, we are mostly spared the spectacle of extravaganzas here in Australia. But I think some of us still struggle with ambivalence at the thought of celebrating ‘Judaism’ at our child’s bar mitzvah reception.

One way of bringing heart and spirit to the occasion is through the speeches. It may be the only time the family can link the events in synagogue with the party that follows; the only moment in the whole proceedings that the family and guests can reconsider what they are doing, why they are there, and who they are honouring.

What follows are some ideas to consider when writing such a speech. It is specifically written for the parents of the bar mitzvah child, but may serve to guide anyone who intends to speak on the day.

• Share your own experience of becoming bar mitzvah. What it meant to you and your parents, what you did, how you celebrated. A meaningful speech can only come from the heart and therefore if you felt ambivalent when you became bar mitzvah, or didn’t have one, or it was not meaningful, then this is what you will say. And if, with reflection you can see what was missing, or what you would have liked, or how satisfied you felt about your own child’s bar mitzvah — then it is truth that is speaking and the heart is touched.

• Remember an anecdote that encapsulates the essential nature of your child. What are his/her qualities, what do you enjoy most about him/her? What do you see developing? What gives you pride? Do any of these qualities remind you of one of our forefathers or foremothers? Does he have the patience of Jacob? The depth of Moses? The kindness of Abraham? Or does she show astuteness and intuition like Rebecca, wisdom like Sarah?

• How did you feel when you heard him/her practicing and studying? What memories came back? Did you consider the parashah together? What insights, emotions, thoughts did you have coming into contact with the Torah like that?

• Try to find a connection with the portion of the Torah that was read. Through metaphor, symbol, imagery – sometimes it can be very meaningful to consider the portion with regards to your child, or your family history, or some other aspect of your lives.

• What Jewish values do you hold dear? Or if you feel more comfortable thinking of them as universal values, say that. What do you value in the world that you would like your child to also uphold? When you look at your child, how do you want him/her to see the world and be within it

• What does Judaism mean to you? Is it family, a way of life, a value system, a proud history? Talk about your own relationship with Judaism. This is a sacred Jewish passage, where a parent is handing his son or daughter to responsibility and adulthood. Let there be an inheritance of experience, ideas, reflection and pride.

• Include Israel, and mitzvot. Buy trees in Israel, organise beforehand to deliver leftover food to a shelter nearby — make your simcha bigger by asking your guests to give to a charity chosen by the bar mitzvah child, or bringing food for Mazon. This is the essential nature of a Jewish celebration.

• Consider using quotes from Jewish thinkers and scholars throughout the ages, or stories from particularly Chassidic sources (plenty on the web) that encapsualate what it is you wish to impart to the bar mitzvah child.

How rare and wonderful to stand before our family, friends and community to state what Judaism means to us!

Donna Jacobs Sife is a Sydney writer.

THE DELIVERY

by Pamela Lemberg

Some two years before its actual date, the average Jewish mother begins her frenetic preparations for her child’s bar or bat mitzvah.

Whereas the organisation of a successful party can be seen primarily as an administrative task, the writing of an effective bar mitzvah speech requires skills that many people find daunting. But the formula is really quite simple: begin at the present, the child that you see standing before you; return to the past, the journey that has taken the child from his/her birth to the here and now; and come back to the present and the future, the emotions of this milestone event and the appreciation of family and friends.

In order to create an easy, flowing presentation, the speech-maker should feel relaxed and confident. Too often the speeches are left to the last moment, are hastily written and so plainly under-rehearsed. Confidence can only come from adequate preparation, well in advance, and then much practice. And size is important too, five to ten minutes being the optimum length without becoming repetitive or boring.

Humour is a vital ingredient in the recipe for the success of a speech — not in the form of jokes, but more in the recounting of original anecdotes that create a picture of the child. Over-sentimentality should be avoided, as should the over-praising of the child in question.

A list of academic and sporting achievements while being a source of great pride for the parents, may not necessarily be of great interest to guests.

Unless one has a prodigious memory or is a skilled orator, it is safer to have a written, large-type transcript of the speech for reference.

However, if the presenter has rehearsed sufficiently and is comfortable with their speech, they may only need to glance at the notes from time to time.

Familiarity with the words will enable the speaker to look up and make eye contact with their audience, thus creating a bond.

Not having a transcript to follow creates the danger of drifting off at a tangent and losing flow and direction. And a smooth flow is paramount — the speech should run seamlessly from one topic to the next in a natural sequence.

When the bar or bat mitzvah child makes the speech, care should be taken to avoid the clichés that seem to be in vogue.

Some speeches are so predictable that you would be hard put to know whose function you were attending. For example: “To my mum, thank you for being there for me”. (Well, where else would a Jewish mother be?) “To my dad, thank you for shlepping me everywhere”. (What’s a Mercedes for?). Or, “Thanks to my grandma, who makes the best chicken soup and kneidlach” (Doesn’t that go without saying?).

The ideal bar or bat mitzvah speech should be informative, entertaining, not too long and just a little sentimental. It should make you laugh and it should make you cry — preferably at the same time. It should make you feel that you know the child well — and are glad to. And, above all, it should make every guest remember the event because of the quality of the speeches.

Pamela Lemberg is a Sydney-based speech writer and author of short stories and poetry.

These articles republished with thanks to the Australian Jewish News.

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Speechworks

Here’s a template for a parent’s bar/bat mitzvah speech.

I wrote this post before I attended my 13-year-old cousin’s bat mitzvah, the traditional service marking a Jewish child’s passage into adulthood. A highlight of many bat/bar mitzvah services is the short blessing or speech from the parents.

The best of these speeches are touching and often a little funny. They have stories that help the congregation get to know the young man or woman who has been studying hard to lead the congregation through that morning’s a Shabbat service.

Along with my wife, I’ve written and delivered three of these two-minute b’nai mitzvah blessings. So if you’re not sure what to say, or if you’re a little nervous, here is our template that you can use to honor your young adult.

Opening Your Speech

Start by telling your daughter how proud you are. Then tell her and the congregation some of the personality traits about her that you most admire.

“[Insert first name of your child]. Your [mother/father] and I are so proud of how well you did today, leading the congregation in prayer this morning. But more than that, we’re proud of the wonderful young man/woman you’ve become.”

“You’re [insert the positive qualities that you admire about your child. For example you might say “You’re sweet, and kind and responsible.” Or “You’re friendly and extremely outgoing!” Or “You’re hard working and generous with your time!” or “You’re not just a wonderful pitcher for the baseball team. You’re warm and caring older brother.”]

Stories are the Best

Next, tell two or three short stories that illustrate your child’s wonderful qualities. Stories are what make these blessings great and memorable.

[I said that you are outgoing and friendly. I remember when we moved to Atlanta from New York. You were sad leaving behind your friends. But you didn’t waste time finding new friends. As soon as we settled into our neighborhood, you found the neighborhood directory and started calling up kids your age in the neighborhood. You said ‘Hi, I’m Elliott. I’m new to the neighborhood. Would you like to play sometime?’” You have to be the first child in history to cold call for friends. The funny thing is that it worked. Several of those friends are here today.”]

[I also said that you were hard working. I remember your first dance recital. You were up in front of a lot of people and you fell down. It was a little embarrassing and you told me so. But you didn’t get frustrated. Rather on the way home you just said to me ‘Dad, I think I need to practice more.’ And that evening, I heard you in the basement, practicing. Now you’re one of the best dancers on the dance team and you’re teaching us moves that we’ve never seen. You’ve even started teaching dance to younger kids at the JCC. Of course you bring that same determination to your studies and to your preparation for this day.]

If you want to add a third story, knock yourself out. But remember that no one wants to hear a long speech. When the Rabbi says “Keep it to two minutes,” he or she really wants it short. Remember, this is not your day. It’s your son or daughter’s day.

End by Going for the Heartstrings

Finish with a sincere pronouncement of love and admiration.

[Of course, we are proud of how you performed today. But that’s not nearly as important as the fact that were are incredibly proud of the young man/young woman that you’ve become. We love you.]

Don’t Forget to Practice . . . A Lot

Once you have the speech written, practice. My wife and I practiced enough so that we could recite it without notes. Lots of practice will help you overcome the natural nerves you’re going to feel.

If you feel you have to use notes, that’s OK. Just read with gusto. You want it to sound like you’re just telling stories at a dinner table.

Practice hard and you’re son or daughter will be as proud of you as you are of him or her.

  Bar Mitzvah & Bat Mitzvah Speeches Reform Perspective by Rivka C. Berman

The Bar Mitzvah boy and the Bat Mitzvah girl are always expected to speak.  For kids who love the stage, here's an opportunity to shine. But for the shy ones, the thought of public speaking may be the source of angst, nightmares and unending fear.

Hence, when composing a bar or bat mitzvah speech for the celebrant, take into consideration the nature and tendencies of the child.  Remember that an audience's positive reinforcement will make or break the child.  Keep speeches short, relevant and entertaining.

Parents, or one of the parents of the celebrant should also take the floor.  Again, keeping it personal, short and to the point will endear the speaker to the crowd.

Grandparents, uncles and aunts, spiritual mentors and close friends may contribute as well.  Do not overload the ceremony with speeches, however, for this is a sure formula to render your affair lackluster and boring.

If the burden of writing speeches is too much, contact professional speech writers.  Canned speeches range from around $40 to $100+ per speech.  Personalized speeches are more expensive and depend on the individual requirements.  Click here for Jewish Celebrations Speech Writing Services

There is a tried and true formulas to bar and bat mitzvah speeches. 1. Opening -“Mom, dad, Rabbi ______, relatives and friends…” -Welcome 2. “This week’s Torah portion…” -brief synopsis of the Torah portion and/or the haftarah 3. “I was thinking about the verse…” -highlight one part of the portion that means something to you or -ask a question about one part of the Torah portion -highlight the deeds of some lesser known people in the portion. Describe the role of women in the parsha or how women may have reacted to the verses and commandments in the parsha. -answer the question based on: -a discussion with your rabbi or teacher “I was talking about this with Rabbi _____ and he explained…” -your own thoughts and feelings -a commentary. Ever since the Torah was given, Jews have been writing their comments on it. There are many books with explanations on each word of the Torah. (Sometimes you may want to read these books first. Find an interesting commentary, and then build a speech around it.)

4. “This reminds me of a story…” “This reminds me of the time I…” -Personalize your insight with a story taken from your own life (your parents, your friends, your uncle) or from Jewish history. 5. “With this in mind, now that I am a bat mitzvah …” -Describe the impact being an adult Jew will make. What will you do to show your ongoing, growing commitment to Judaism? 6. Thank you -Thank parents for… -Thank the rabbi and your tutor or Hebrew school teacher -Thank siblings for not completely embarrassing you. -Thank out of town relatives for making the journey -Thank everyone for coming. (At some synagogues, a limit will be put on thank you section. It is always recommended to keep it short!) Mazal Tov!

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Jewish Journal

Connect. inform. inspire., the easy way to write your speech for a bar/bat mitzvah.

• By Jewish Journal
• Published December 18, 2013

Most people are happier being reaudited by a fiber-deficient IRS agent than speaking in public. They’re even more fartutst about writing their own speeches. 

Sometimes, we have to do both. 

It’s easy for me. I’ve been a speechwriter all my life. But you can do it, too, anxiety-free, as long as you follow a few rules. In fact, if you’ve been asked to speak at someone’s bar or bat mitzvah, you may even find the process of writing a speech quite simple and fun. (Notice I said process.)

Where do you start? 

1. Prepare early . The minute the date is set and you know you’ll have a speaking part in the celebration, start thinking about what you might say. That gives you a year. Don’t wait until it’s 8:52 on Saturday morning, and the bar mitzvah begins in eight minutes. At that point, it’s almost too late for even a professional to help you.

2. Find a theme for your speech . There is a portion of the Torah read at every bar or bat mitzvah. It corresponds to that particular week and is called a parasha . It’s easy to look it up, along with its modern meaning. Maybe the theme is trust. Maybe bravery. Overcoming hardship. Tie that in with your special feelings for the child being celebrated. Add to it by sharing some of the best memories of that young person. “I remember the scooter when …” 

You could also refer to the honoree’s Hebrew name, connecting it to the biblical character with the same moniker, if there is one. However, if the child who is coming of age is named Boo Boo or Bugsy, you might have to be a little creative.

Your speech might also discuss the Jewish values and traditions you observe together. Lighting the Shabbat candles is one. Saying Kiddush. Celebrating Chanukah. That’s a classic approach. To be more contemporary, you could talk about how you and the bat mitzvah girl go rippin’ along the Pacific Coast Highway on your Harley every Sunday, or how you and the bar mitzvah boy have watched every episode of “Breaking Bad” over and over together, and are in the same 12-step program to stop. 

3. Don’t be intimidated . You’re not addressing Congress or the Supreme Court. This isn’t your Harvard entrance essay. It’s a private, family gathering. You’re not Jimmy Fallon and you won’t be appearing on national TV. You probably won’t even be on YouTube, unless the challah somehow starts dancing the lambada. It’s just you, your extended family and your friends. Everybody will be cheering for you. 

4. Make lists. Before trying to write sentences for my speeches, I make lists. Then my lists make lists. I move ideas around and add new ones. As a writer, I know better than to sit down at my desk, thinking I’ll nail something perfectly in the first draft. In reality, as ideas pop into my head, I scribble them on anything I can find, including the upholstery in my car. 

And rather than feel the panic of having to sit there and finish this speech tonight tonight tonight , I make an appointment with myself to write for five minutes a day on weekdays. Not everybody has a couple of hours each morning, but we all have five minutes — no skipping. I mark the appointment with me in my day planner. And even if the page is blank when my five minutes are up, I check off that time anyway. I’ve kept my commitment. Maybe tomorrow something good will appear during my warm-up session. Eventually, it always does. 

When I get a draft — no matter how scattered it is, I congratulate myself and haul out the candy corn. Rewards for good work go a long way. 

5. Hook ’em with a great opening. You have a captive audience. Don’t lose them by starting with recycled language. You’re not a cliché. Your speech at a bar or bat mitzvah shouldn’t be one, either.

In your opening sentence, be clever. Maybe a little funny, too. If you’re speaking at a reception, instead of simply thanking the chefs who brought hors d’oeuvres , how about, “The CIA confirms that Aunt Puddy, Auntie Lacy and Great Aunt Yakabovsky caught the carp, the whitefish and the pike themselves. Now that’s gefilte fish. And nobody named Manischewitz was involved.”

6. How long should I speak? Less is more. Keep it short. If you’re the only speaker, five minutes. If you’re sharing the time-slot, three. You want to say what’s in your heart, leave your fingerprint in the room, congratulate the honoree and his or her family, then sit down.

7. How do I end my speech? “ Mazel tov! ” and “ L’chaim !” get ’em every time.

Molly-Ann Leikin is an executive speechwriter and Emmy nominee living in Santa Monica. Her Web site is anythingwithwords.com .

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Five Tips For Bar/Bat Mitzvah Parents: How To Write An Impactful Bima Speech

After months (and often years) of planning, your child’s Bar/Bat Mitzvah day is finally here. You may be asked to give a speech during the service to acknowledge how hard your child has worked to prepare for this milestone. Like many of my clients, you may feel eager to give this type of speech, but struggle with how to put your thoughts together in speech form. You worry about what stories to share, how to avoid sounding generic and how to hold your emotions together on such a special day. When it’s time to craft your speech, keep these five tips in mind:

1. Think about tie to Judaism. Nowadays families can get so swept up in the details of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah party that the importance of the service can often play second fiddle. The parent’s speech is an opportunity to acknowledge the spiritual and religious significance of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah itself. You can consider talking about the role that Judaism plays in your child’s life or what Jewish values you prioritize at home. If you are not particularly observant, there’s no need to exaggerate, but finding one Jewish theme or teaching is a good way to remind your child of why he/she is having a Bar/Bat Mitzvah in the first place.

2. Be proud, but not too proud. When it comes to your child, it is expected that you will share your pride and joy with the family and friends who have gathered for the service. This is your opportunity to share just how exceptional your child really is. Just be cautious that your whole speech doesn’t become a bragging fest. It’s perfectly okay to talk about Jacob’s piano talents or Hannah’s prowess on the soccer friend, but do so in moderation. And make sure that you’re not sharing a laundry list of accomplishments. Your guests will be much more interested to hear about your child’s character or the unique relationship you have with your child.

3. Capture the highlights, not the full story. Think of your speech like a highlights reel rather than a documentary. Since you only have about five minutes to deliver your speech, you don’t have time to tell your child’s entire life story. Pick one or two heartwarming or funny stories that truly capture the spirit of your child. It may be tempting to share inside jokes, but remember that you want everyone in the room to be able to relate to what you are saying. Opt for the memories that will resonate beyond those “in the know.”

4. Make a wish. This is a turning point in your child’s life as he/she finds the delicate balance between adolescence and adulthood. It’s natural for you to look ahead and express your future hopes and dreams for your child. This is a nice way to wrap up your speech. At the same time, try to avoid using generic language so that you can end on a high note. Be specific. Let’s say your child loves ice cream. Consider saying something like, “May your life be filled the happiness that a mint chocolate chip, cookie dough ice cream sundae with extra fudge can provide.” This is much more impactful than saying, “My biggest wish is that your life is happy.”

5. Address your child directly. Toward the end of the speech, talk directly to your child. Say his/her name and make eye contact. This is the time to express or reiterate the two or three things you want your child to remember and take with him/her long after the Bar/Bat Mitzvah has ended. This is your moment to connect one-on-one with your child despite being in front of a larger audience. Make it count.

When it’s time to deliver your speech, know that you can’t go wrong with words from the heart. A parent’s love for a child is such a beautiful thing to express, so go with it. And if your emotions start to show, it’s okay. Trust me, your child will still be proud of you.

#Barmitzvah #BatMitzvah #BarMitzvahspeechforparents #BatMitzvahspeechforparents #bima

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Bar and Bat Mitzvah Parent Speeches

Sample bar and bat mitzvah parent speeches.

Most temples offer the parents of the Bat Mitzvah girl or Bar Mitzvah boy an opportunity to share some words of wisdom.  Even if you are the best contemporaneous speaker on earth, we always recommend jotting down your thoughts. We have attended hundreds of B'nai Mitzvot and have never, ever seen a parent speak who was not feeling intensely emotional at the moment.  If you take no other advice from PartyIdeaPros.com, please give yourself plenty of time to mull over what you would like to say to your child and write it down!

After many requests for sample speeches we are beginning to compile the best of the best.  If you would like to help out other parents searching for inspiration, please submit your speech to [email protected] for consideration.  We will publish the best of the best!

Bar & Bat Mitzvah Parent Speeches >> Sample 1

Your child's name –

When we began this journey, we viewed today as an individual rite of passage — a celebration of your birthday, the legal age in which you assume a role of responsibility in the Jewish community, and a celebration of your hard work and your efforts, and especially all of your enormous accomplishments. But with time, it became clear that this celebration is really much larger than just that – for mom and me, it is about trust in G-d.

At first we wondered, why this Torah portion. The answer … maybe it’s meant to be. Mom would say, “it’s b’shert.” As you well know, and will discuss later this morning, this week’s Torah portion is from Leviticus, the rulebook of the Torah. And although Leviticus lacks the great stories of Genesis and Exodus, those who know you well and understand you, would probably agree that this is your book. It provides structure and purpose to life’s vagaries. It elevates events of daily life to a higher moral ground.

You do best when life is unambiguous – You like clarity and lucidity. The clearer the rules the better. You welcome and find merit in ritual and easily appreciate the Torah’s bigger lessons. We proudly watched as you grew to understand just how valuable the weekly parsha, even this seemingly archaic portion, could be in your daily life. We hope that you will continue your studies and will continue to turn to the Torah throughout your life, for the sheer joy of study, for answers and for questions and mostly, for hope.

Today, in this temple, a house of worship and ritual, you join them. It is your turn to be encircled by family, friends and community – some of whom have never even met you, and yet were willing to make the effort to be here with us. We are all here to witness and celebrate with you, as you represent our trust in G-d, our hopes, our dreams. You are the promise. We watch you embracing the torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches.

The Torah is the authority that guides our choices in life. You will have many choices in your life. We have come to trust your judgment and your choices. But throughout your life you will be thrown curveballs, unexpected events happen. Remember that Leviticus and its rules is just 1/5th of the Torah, much of the Torah is about life unfolding and learning how our ancestors dealt with the life’s challenges, sometimes successfully and sometimes not. We want you to know that Mom and I will always be here for you as your life unfolds.

We also want you to know that family and friends are here for you too.  Your child's name , may you endeavor to be a good person. Remember that all G-d really requires from you is your just actions. It really is pretty black and white – it’s about mitzvot, it’s about your deeds.

It is about respect for and pride in your heritage, and living an ethical, balanced life with honor, integrity, and laughter.

May you learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes, and may you, too, always trust to G-d.

B'nai Mitzvot  Parent Speeches >> Sample 2

Your child's name , in your Torah portion, Moses says, “Dedicate yourselves to the Lord this day … that he may bestow a blessing upon you today.” And here we stand. You, like your Mom and I before you, and your grandparents before us and their parents before them, dedicating yourself to G-d. Looking out we can see just how blessed you are, surrounded by friends and family who love you and are here to support you. Know Mom and I will also always be here whenever you need us and even sometimes when you don’t think you need us. But today, we are all here to witness your commitment to G-d and the Jewish people and to celebrate with you. We watch you, embracing the Torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches.

From the day you were born, we intuitively knew you were especially blessed by G-d. And we were right. You have so many talents `… you are bright, you are creative, you are funny, you are athletic and you are a natural leader. We hope you recognize, celebrate and cherish these blessings as gifts from G-d to be used wisely and responsibly. Look to the Torah as inspiration and guidance as you face the daily joys and challenges of your life.

We know you love a good story and are drawn to the larger than life epics which unfold in the books of Genesis and Exodus. Embrace not only the stories, but also their lessons. Emulate the mighty intellect and conviction of Moses. Nurture the compassion and leadership skills of Aaron. And in these times of doubt and turmoil, adopt your ancestors trust in G-d. As your life unfolds, we hope you will more and more learn to value the other books in the Bible, too … yes, even the books dealing with the laws and rules. The Torah is the authority that guides our choices in life. The Torah teaches both balance and structure.

We hope you turn to G-d and the Torah to find that balance and to create structure in your own life, for you will need both to fulfill the promise in you, to find the holiness within and to appreciate, cultivate and celebrate the very special blessings G-d has bestowed upon you.

Not only do you have the writings and teachings of the Torah to turn to for guidance, you are encircled by family and friends who, too, have dedicated themselves to G-d: striving to live ethical, balanced lives with honor, integrity and laughter. You are surrounded by loved ones who are what Nanna and Bubbe, might call mentsches. You are blessed to have such wonderful role models.

And  your child's name , no boy called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah, could have better role models than your grandfathers. Both are professionally accomplished and successful. Both Grandpa and Popol are cherished by those whose lives they have touched. They are respected for their warmth, their dignity, their intellect, their virtue, and yes, their humor. And equally important, both are committed to the teachings of the Torah. They have devoted hours and hours to ‘Tikum Olam,” or repairing the world, and to doing “Mitzvoth” or good deeds. They know that if you endeavor to be a good person, life is much more simple. They understand that all G-d really requires from you is your just actions. So  your child's name , remember, it’s about mitzvoth, it’s about your deeds; it’s about the choices you make. You are so very blessed to have wise and loving grandparents. Emulate them!

As you know, Granny and Grandpa wanted to be here with you to witness you being called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah. They wanted nothing more than to be able to pass the Torah to still another generation and have expressed to you their pride in your accomplishments and joy in your acceptance of the responsibility of Jewish manhood. Tonight they will rejoice with us. Grandpa even sent you an email saying, “We plan to have a special bottle of champagne to celebrate on the east coast.” Once again, Grandpa gently guides us all, with grace and fortitude. He knows the Torah teaches us to serve G-d with joy. Performance of mitzvoth is to be celebrated!

Your child's name , we are so very blessed to have you as our son. May you learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes.

May you constantly re-dedicate yourself to G-d and may G-d continue to bestow blessings upon you. We wish for you, our family, friends, our country and Israel, the words inscribed upon your tallit: “Sim Shalom Tovah Uvracha …” “May G-d give peace, goodness, and blessing…”

We love you, yes we do..!

Parent Speech Sample  3

Our Dearest  your child's name,

Poppy from Chicago had a dream that his family would make a pilgrimage to Israel, together. At every Seder, every birthday, ok, all holidays, he would passionately, declare, “Next year in Jerusalem.”

Dreaming of a pilgrimage to Israel means different things to different people. Some of us are primarily interested in the vast array of historically significant sites, and for others the awe-inspiring beauty of the countryside is enough, but for many Jews, a pilgrimage to Israel is also a spiritual journey, for some, a search for spiritual peace. Rabbi Aaron Moss explains: “Jerusalem means ‘the city of peace’ – a place of peace between body and soul, heaven and earth, ideal and reality. When our body becomes not a prison for the soul but rather a vehicle for the soul's expression; when we live our lives according to our ideals rather than our cravings; when the world values goodness and generosity over selfish gain, then we are in Jerusalem, we are at peace with ourselves and the world.” This is the dream. You,  your child's name , personify this dream.

You are blessed with the gift of serenity: your family and friends appreciate your diplomacy and quiet calm, and horses respond to your touch. This is why,  your child's name , our little Yitzchaka, she who laughs (and yes, you laugh often and easily), Poppy’s namesake, it is even more fitting that it is you, a young lady of integrity, poise, generosity and serenity who has made his dream, “Next Year in Jerusalem” a reality.

As we stand here, your relatives and congregational family, on this special day, celebrating your becoming a Bat Mitzvah, in the land of our ancestors, it is important to remember those who came before us, who we cherish and who we respect. Your grandparents and their parents and their parents before them embraced a strong, enduring belief and trust in G-d. They accepted the responsibilities of the special covenant between G-d and the Jewish people, living their lives with honor and integrity. They performed mitzvoth and tikkun olam. They had dreams. They had hopes. They created traditions. They guided us, schooled us and modeled Jewish values, and as commanded, passed them on from generation to generation.

Now  your child's name it is your turn. We watched you embracing the Torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches. We are all here to witness and celebrate with you, as you represent our trust in G-d, our hopes, our dreams. You are the promise.

As you were preparing for your D’var Torah, Rabbi _______  posed to you a few questions to ponder. Some of the questions were easy, factual questions, but some required more thought. He asked you to think abstractly and philosophically about topics that probably have never even crossed your mind. We hope you continue to ponder, to think about matters of consequence, of meaning beyond the everyday minutia. Torah will help guide you in thinking about these issues. It will make your life richer and give you moral direction.

Your child's name , think about Torah as the authority that guides our choices in life. We hope you turn to it as you face your own choices. We have come to trust your judgment and your decisions. Nevertheless, throughout your life unexpected things will happen. Some days you will ride beautifully, other days you will be thrown off your horse, and at least once in your life, your horse will just plain refuse to move – just like in your parasha. Much of the Torah is about life unfolding and learning how our ancestors dealt with life’s challenges, sometimes successfully and sometimes not. your child's name, please know that Mom and I will always be here for you as your life unfolds. And, that family, friends, and clergy are here for you too.

Your child's name , remember the lesson of your Haftorah: that all G-d really requires from you is to do justice, love goodness, and walk humbly with your G-d.

May you absorb the years of history, knowledge, and wisdom this amazing land has to offer, learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes, and may every year be in Jerusalem!

We love you, yes we do, do, do, do doooooooooooooo!

B'nai Mitzvot  Parent Speeches >> Sample 4

From the day you were born into this world you wanted the whole world to know you were on this earth. We instinctively knew at that moment you held a promise. Your hand came out waving first, as if to say, “Here I am.!” You screamed the loudest scream we had ever heard and immediately grabbed and held your bottle to your lips. Granted you were born almost three weeks late, but we knew right then you held a promise and you wanted the whole world to see and hear you. Since that day, as you have grown from a toddler to a child, to a young lady of Bat Mitzvah age, you have each step of the way shown us you continue to hold a promise.

Always questioning, always either the best day of your whole life or even a paper cut could make it the worst day of your whole life, ever dramatic in life’s challenges and opportunities, but always sweet, poised and full of love. From the day you were born until this very day, you were blessed with the gifts of your grandmothers and their mothers before them, the gifts of warmth, poise, generosity, sweetness and dignity. Like your great grandfather, one of your namesakes, your eyes have always sparkled with the joy of life, full of love. This sparkle holds a promise in you.

So then, what is the promise you hold? The promise is the very values and traditions of all those who came before us, who we cherish and respect. The values and traditions of your grandparents and their parents and their parents before them, which we hope will guide you in your life – values of family, of community, of living your life with purpose and dignity, performing mitzvot and acts of tikkun olam.

And importantly, your ancestors not only accepted the responsibility of our peoples’ special covenant with G-d, they also modeled Jewish values, and as commanded, passed them on dor l’dor, from generation to generation, with the hope and dream that one day their children and children’s children would fulfill the promise of living their lives with honor and integrity and with those Jewish values which call upon us to reach out to those in need, and which commands us to play a part in making this a better world. 13 years later, we can say that you are well on your path to embracing and fulfilling your promise by living these values. And always our little drama queen, we have no doubt that you will allow the whole world to see your promise!

You and I have been coming here to this shul nearly every Shabbat morning for the past 13 years. Your mother and I celebrated our aufruf here, you and your sisters were given your Hebrew names here before the Torah, and now today, at this very same Shulhan where we celebrated these moments of our greatest joy, you were called to the Torah as an adult Jew. Today you have accepted responsibility for your actions as an adult Jew.

What does that mean? Today, you stand on your own before God, responsible for the mitzvot given us; it is up to you to always find your place among your people; you must now keep alive that two thousand year old connection to the Land of Israel; and now you too must hear the Torah’s call for Tikkun Olam, for you are now personally responsible to be an active part of healing this world.

Is it all about responsibility? We bring you to shul every Shabbat and holiday, send you to Jewish Day School and keep the traditions and rituals of our faith in our home so that you will have knowledge – an understanding of your people and your heritage. It is our hope that from this understanding will come respect for, and pride in, your heritage and a joy in embracing the richness of our traditions. As we watched you today embracing the Torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, and a sense of personal connection, we are confident that you will fulfill the promise passed down to you: to strive to live by the values our Torah teaches us – to live a virtuous life with honor, integrity and just deeds every step of the way.

Our promise to you today is to be there for you always, in joyful times and to wipe away your tears, to support you, teach you (even when you don’t want to heed our lessons), guide you through life’s challenges and prospects. Our prayer for you today is for a long life filled with peace, health, happiness and purpose, surrounded by family, friends and community. It is our hope and dream that you will turn the best days and the worst days of your life into a medley of meaning and joy. Cherish life and make each day full of purpose by enriching the lives of others with a smile, a kind word or a good deed. This will fulfill the promise. And, yes, …let the whole world see and hear you do just that!

We love you around the world and back, forever and always!

Parent Speeches Sample 5

Your child's name , from the day you were born, you have always been a blessing for the two of us, and for all your family. As a baby, you were warm and cuddly. And to this day, when you smile, we can see sunshine on a cloudy day, and when you laugh, you can take our minds off any unhappy thought. If one of your sisters has something else going on, and the other wants a playmate, you are always there. And, of course, if the phone rings any time from 3:00 to 11:00 p.m., we know it’s for you, as you are a source of happiness for all your friends.

But every person has many sides to them.

On the other hand, you have always been a determined person. (That’s a polite way of saying stubborn.) We were trying to remember your first word. Mom thought it was “Mama”, but I am pretty sure it was “NO!” If you didn’t want to do something, there was no changing your mind. While there are days that have been a little challenging as a parent, and we aren’t necessarily speaking in the past tense here, it is also something we admire about you. We admire it because it is most evident when it comes to your sense of justice and fairness. Even as an infant you would sometimes wail for hours, almost as if you were crying on behalf of all the injustices surrounding you in the world. While thankfully, you no longer wail, you still let us and everyone around you know that justice must prevail!

As we read your Torah portion, the first parashah in Vayikra, the Book of Leviticus, and the volume which is the source of so much of Jewish law, we were struck by how appropriate it was that your first act as an adult Jew should be to read aloud some of the detailed laws given to our people at Sinai 4,000 years ago. We have never seen you break a rule, and in your thirteen years, we have never seen you treat someone unfairly.

These are wonderful traits, and your sense of justice has been with you since you were a baby. You your child's name , are our righteous child. Even from an early age you instinctively knew what was right and what was wrong. Kindness, fairness and honesty have always been important to you. We know that even when it’s not popular, your compass always points north. You would rather part with friends than join them in mistreating someone.

We live in a world today in which decency, fairness, justice and order are all too often in short supply. These are lessons which the Torah, and specifically your parashah, teach us. We pray that they will forever guide you, and that you will always be known for them.

Hazakah u’beracha m’ija.

Your child's name , as you know we gave you something to share in common with us. Like each of us, you are the middle child. You know full well the challenges associated with being in the middle, but you also know the blessings – of always being surrounded by love and friendship from the two people who share the most in common with you, your sisters. And no one knows how to appreciate her sister’s love and attention more than you – the knowing love when you let  sibling 1 spend the night in your room after she watched a scary movie, or the excitement you show when sibling 2 wants to just hang and talk.

You also have a sense of balance in life that is wonderful and intriguing in its contrasts. You are incredibly cautious, but you ride and jump horses. You take your school work very seriously, but you spend hours every night chatting with friends. You have the lowest tolerance for touring an art museum, but you love doing art projects. For the last year, you have made clear that you were not happy being the designated Kiddush reader at our Shabbat table, but today you read the longest Haftorah of the year.

When we held your brit ha-bat nearly 13 years ago, we gave you two Hebrew names, name1 name 2 , the names of two of your great-grandparents of blessed memory who, along with all of your other great-grandparents and grandparents were role models for all of us who followed them.  Name1 came from Nona , your father’s maternal grandmother. She was a woman of courage and strength, whose dedication to her family helped bring them through some of the worst years our people have ever experienced. She had many talents and friends, but we all remember her most for her absolute dedication to her family.

Name2 came from Poppy , my paternal grandfather. A man of great strength who always had a smile and a warm embrace, who was respected for his generosity, good deeds, keen humor, and integrity. Poppy  lived his life zestfully, surrounded by family and good friends.   Poppy and Nona always knew how to do the right thing. Importantly, both were committed to the teachings of the Torah and doing mitzvoth, good deeds. May you draw strength from those that came before you and from the example of those who surround you today. Like each of your great-grandparents, and that day 13 years ago, this was our prayer for you – to live a life of righteousness.

Today, child's name , we can tell you that we know our prayer has been fulfilled, and always will be. In this most important way, you showed that you were ready to be an adult long before this day. We love you forever and always! And we are always proud of you. Mazel tov!

B'nai Mitzvot  Parent Speeches >> Sample 6

Child's name, from the day you were born you were termed our “easy” one.   Even as a baby, you didn’t cry much or seem to need much. It was almost as if you instinctively knew there was so much going on around you that you would try and make life a bit easier for those who loved and cared for you. As you have grown from a toddler to a child, to a young lady of Bat Mitzvah age, you have each step of the way shown us you continue to be the “easy” one. Rarely do you display a temper, a dramatic flair, or a competitive nature. Rather, you are always present with a ready smile, a kind thought, a calming demeanor, and a cute (child's name)’ism, our endearing term coined to refer to your always quick, sometimes serious, and always hilarious, even when unintended, remarks.

But don’t misunderstand, behind that quiet, relaxed manner, we have all witnessed the spirited (child's name), the mischievous sparkle in your eyes, whether you and (friend) are cutting each other’s bangs, coloring on our walls and your sisters dolls, being rescued from near drowning on the high seas, wandering off at a water park, bouncing around the house, or even just relaxing watching television, your playful, feisty personality sparkles with the joy of life, full of love.

Since you were born 13 years ago today, you have been both blessed and a blessing. You have been surrounded by people who love you and in turn you have been a source of love and amusement for all those who know you. These include four grandparents who have always been the recipients of your affection, even during your no kissing stage, your two best friends for whom your arrival heralded the completion of a close sisterhood that will last your life times.

For aunts, uncles and cousins, you have always been the youngest, but in so many wonderful ways you have always ensured you have not been overlooked, you found a wonderful group of friends when you began preschool who are with you here today but you have always remained open to newcomers and so your circle of good friends seems to always be growing , and for the two of us, you have been our never ending source of love, you have given us such pride and joy, and you still remain a source of endless cuddling.

You have taught us so many things, not the least of which is how to relax, put your feet up, enjoy life and how to appreciate the humor of the George Lopez TV show. While we joke about your stress- free, relaxed approach to life, there is something very refreshing, even valuable in your approach.

As we mark this special occasion, we are grateful that the wishes we expressed at your brit ha-bat, that you be imbued with the values and traits of your namesakes, your great grandmothers name and name : dedication to your sisters and family, graciousness and kind words for everyone around you, are the ways in which we think of you. And like your grandmothers and great grandmothers, yours is a gentle strength, quiet and relaxed, but always ready to act to help others when needed. May you always be known among our people for these hallmarks.

An amusing (child's name)’ism from when you were only five or six that speaks about your nature was when (sibling 2) was already discussing college, and in a moment of silence you said you weren’t sure yet what you wanted to do, but you wanted to know what would be a good school to attend if you wanted to be a veterinarian and what would be a good school if you chose to be a clown. At the time, we all had a great laugh. But we knew then what you had already decided to make priorities in your life – caring for others, including animals, and making others smile.

You are the one who on a Sunday morning will curl up with dog's name and play for as long as she has patience, and you took up horse riding inspired by (sibling 1) and wanting to find another way to share this passion with her. You have enjoyed developing your horse riding skills, but it is not the competition which keeps you engaged, it is the bonding with (sibling 1) and the horses.

And you are (sibling 2's) biggest fan, expressing excitement watching every single show she performs in. You are easy going and the peacemaker among your sisters, always willing to give up your preferences to keep the three of you together. And to this day, when I come home at night, you always greet me with a genuine, “how was your day Daddy?” You have the special gift of being attuned to the needs of others, being considerate of others and compassionate towards all.

In our tradition, we are taught to seek a shem tov, a good name. This is not a name given to you, but one which you earn from others. Regardless of what you encounter in life, these traits already so well exhibited by you are your path to acquiring a shem tov. We don’t know if you will become a veterinarian or a clown, or maybe even a Nielsen TV rater, but we hope for you that you find a passion that will excite you to last a career, and you continue to bounce to the beat of your own drum, and that whatever you do, we pray that you will always be described as someone who heals and someone who makes those around her smile.

And we pray that the love of family, of the people you come to know, of all living creatures, and of your people, our traditions, and the land of Israel remain the values which guide your life.

Mazel tov on taking your place as an adult woman in the community of the people Israel! As we close our remarks to you, I would like to make reference to the first recorded (child's name)’ism, and that is to tell you that “I have some pretty good news for you…”

We love you, forever and always!

  Planning a  Mitzvah?

• Bar Mitzvah Invitations
• Bat Mitzvah – Ceremony & Celebration– Themes and Mitzvah Basics

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What to write in a bar mitzvah or bat mitzvah card.

So you’ve got a bar mitzvah card or bat mitzvah card you need to sign? Mazel tov! Not only are these occasions inspiring to see and fun to take part in—they’re also a very big deal in the life of a person of the Jewish faith. When you write a personal message in your card to the bar or bat mitzvah, you’re adding to the joy and significance of their big day.

If you’re stumped on what to write in a bar/bat mitzvah card, this article has writing tips and ideas to get you going.

Inspired? Create and share by tagging @HallmarkStores .

But first, here’s a super-quick primer on the celebrations that might help, too:

Bar/bat mitzvah literally translates as “son/daughter of the commandments.” This rite marks their entry as adults into their faith community. These students of the faith put in a lot of hard work preparing for a special Shabbat service at their synagogue, in which they read aloud from the Torah and sometimes lead prayers or chants, too. Traditionally, bar mitzvahs are 13 years old and bat mitzvahs are either 12 or 13. It’s becoming more common for adults to become bar/bat mitzvahs, too, but no matter what the age of your recipient, they will appreciate your recognition and the time and thought you put into giving them a card.

From words of pride to blessings to congratulations, there are all kinds of messages that work well in bar/bat mitzvah cards. And it’s fine to write a little or a lot, depending on how well you know the bar/bat mitzvah themselves. The message ideas below are divided by theme, but you can mix and match to come up with the words that feel just right for you to send.

• Mazel Tov Congratulations
• Pride and Compliments
• Faith and Tradition
• Funny Messages
• Warm Closings

Mazel Tov Congratulations  

Literally translated, the Yiddish phrase “mazel tov” means something closer to “good luck,” but it’s more commonly used to congratulate someone. A short mazel tov message by itself works well for a recipient you don’t know as well, but you could also use it to round out a longer message.

• “Mazel tov, Bar Mitzvah!”
• “Best wishes and mazel tov to you as you celebrate your bat mitzvah!”
• “Congratulations and mazel tov, Bar Mitzvah! (I’m so proud of you, I had to say both.)”
• “This day is so meaningful, and you’ve worked so hard for it. Mazel tov.”
• “Congratulations on what you’ve achieved and on stepping into your faith community as an adult today.”
• “Congratulations! Your bat mitzvah marks a huge accomplishment—but it’s only the beginning of all a young woman like you is going to achieve.”
• “Mazel tov! What a happy and unforgettable day this is for you and for all of us who’ve had the joy of watching you grow to be a man.”

Helpful tip: Even for those of us who don’t come from a Jewish faith tradition, “mazel tov” is one in-culture phrase that’s easy to say or write without feeling awkward or like we’re trying too hard. But go with your gut—if “congratulations” feels more you, then go with that.

Wishes  

A heartfelt wish is another great thing to write in a bar/bat mitzah card. You could make it a wish for the big day itself or go bigger and make a hopeful wish for the bar/bat mitzvah’s future.

• “Wishing you so much happiness as you celebrate your bat mitzvah!”
• “May the wisdom you’ve learned studying for your bar mitzvah guide you all your days.”
• “We wish you an unforgettable bar mitzvah celebration and all the best in the exciting years ahead of you.”
• “Love, blessings and best wishes to you, Bat Mitzvah!”
• “Hoping your bar mitzvah day is a proud and happy one for you!”
• “Mazel tov, Bat Mitzvah. May you continue to grow in wisdom and faith from this day on.”
• “Wishing you a great time celebrating your bar mitzvah…I hope it’s a day you’ll always look back on with pride and happiness.”

Helpful tip: First timer? If so, you could make an added connection by mentioning that in what you write: “Your bar mitzvah is the first one I’ve been lucky enough to be invited to. It’s such an honor to be a part of it. Thanks for including me in your big day!”

Pride and Compliments  

One does not become a bar/bat mitzvah simply by showing up on the big day. There is diligent study and preparation involved, and that’s worthy of a callout. You might choose to highlight all the hard work and schvitzing (sweating) with a message of pride or with a compliment for the bar/bat mitzvah.

• “So proud of the dedicated way you’ve prepared for this day. Great job—and mazel tov!”
• “We were always proud of the girl you were, and we’re even prouder of the woman you become today.”
• “No one could have worked harder or done more to deserve this day. Way to show what you’re made of!”
• “I hope you feel proud of yourself as you wear the tallit and read from the Torah. And I hope you feel how proud you’ve made everyone around you, too.”
• “A bar mitzvah is more than a party. It’s an important step in your faith and a big accomplishment, too. So mazel tov and hats off to you!”
• “It’s so much fun to congratulate a bat mitzvah as smart and talented as you! Celebrating you today and looking forward to watching your life unfold in amazing ways.”
• “If ever a bar mitzvah deserved a great party, it’s you! Enjoy it! You’ve earned it!”
• “It’s no easy thing to stand up and be the center of attention on your bat mitzvah day, but we know how hard you’ve worked, and we know you’re going to do yourself and your family proud.”

Helpful tip: If it’s helpful, you could think of a bar/bat mitzvah as a little like a graduation. Of course, a bar/bat mitzvah has a spiritual significance that graduations don’t have. However, the sense of a worthy goal achieved, of pride in hard work and of a young person moving on to a new stage in their life—all these things hold true for both occasions.

Faith and Tradition  

Celebrating the faith and deep-rooted traditional aspects of a bar/bat mitzvah is another great way to go with your message. And luckily, you don’t have to have a rabbi’s understanding of the occasion to write something that’s both honoring and meaningful.

• “Here’s to you, Bat Mitzvah—shining bright today and carrying the light of faith into tomorrow.”
• “What a joy it is to welcome a young man like you to our community of faith. Mazel tov.”
• “Warmest congratulations on your bar mitzvah. It’s inspiring to think of you taking your place in your faith community and carrying on such an enduring tradition.”
• “Mazel tov, Bat Mitzvah. God bless you and guide you today and always.”
• “Today you follow in the footsteps of so many generations who came before you…and step into a future made brighter by your love for your faith, your family and your community.”
• “Blessings on you as you celebrate your bat mitzvah.”
• “Hoping you learned lessons that will always stay with you as you studied and prepared for your bar mitzvah. May the Torah’s teachings continue to guide you and bring you happiness throughout your life.”
• “Congratulations on your bat mitzvah! What a wonderful way to honor your rich heritage and celebrate your faith.”

Helpful tip: As part of the occasion, a bar/bat mitzvah will sometimes declare a cause that they plan to advocate for. It’s one way of embracing their new adult status and doing some real good with it. It’s a very cool thing—and it may inspire some new thoughts for you as you think about what you want to write.

Funny Messages  

Even though a bar/bat mitzvah is a serious occasion, there’s still room for a little good-natured humor—especially if you know the bar/bat mitzvah well and have a good sense of what they’d find funny. Money is a customary gift for a bar/bat mitzvah, so it’s an especially easy way to infuse a little humor into your written message.

• “Today you begin your journey into womanhood…but somehow you still have a 10 p.m. curfew. Oh well. One step at a time, right?”
• “Happy bar mitzvah! Have the most fun a guy can have with all your family right there watching your every move.”
• With money/gift card enclosed: “First of all, so proud of you! Second—and more importantly—here’s a little something to show you just how proud.”
• With money/gift card enclosed: “Hope the happy bat mitzvah glow just lasts and lasts. (This little gift is meant to help with that!)”
• With money/gift card enclosed: “For all that extra wisdom you’ve stored away in your heart…here’s a little extra cash for your pocket. Mazel tov!”
• “There’s never, ever been a bar mitzvah quite like you! (That’s supposed to be a compliment, in case you couldn’t tell.)”
• “Okay, so great new dress, cute shoes, awesome party…I’m a little jealous that I didn’t get all this when I was 13. Okay, a LOT jealous. But I’m still so happy for you! Mazel tov!”

Helpful tip: Joking about gifts and celebrating is one thing. Summoning up offensive stereotypes or poking fun at Jewish culture is another—and should absolutely be avoided. When in doubt, skip the funny and keep your message straightforward.

Warm Closings  

A warm closing before your signature provides a nice finishing touch for your bar/bat mitzvah message. Choose one of ours or come up with one of your own.

• Congratulations,
• Warmest congratulations,
• Lots of love,
• Love always,
• Much love to you,
• All my/our love,
• All the best,
• Proud of you,
• With pride and best wishes,
• greeting card messages

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